


In the Time of the Bells

by MysteriousStranger



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Carmilla's backstory, F/F, I have some shame but not much, I hope someone forgives me for how much making out there is in this, Mild Horror, Purple prose (sorry), Unavoidable sexytimes, Waking Dreams, some violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-19
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-08 05:58:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 87,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3198002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysteriousStranger/pseuds/MysteriousStranger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Laura keeps having strange dreams that seem very real, featuring the same dark and brooding stranger who is, perhaps, a bit too hands on. What secrets is this strange girl hiding?</p><p>They meet across a number of dreams, at different times, each getting increasingly weirder and scarier, until we get to present day Silas University.</p><p>Features Victorian Carmilla and Oblivious Laura from Le Fanu's original novella.</p><p>Slightly off-kilter version of the web series, Silas University is still a strange and dangerous place where the bells of the carillon in the old clock tower ring daily in preparation for some kind of mysterious jubilee celebration the Dean is planning.</p><p>Okay, I don't want to give too much away but this might be a ridiculous retelling of a famous Scottish fairytale...</p><p>
  <a href="http://strangeandsombre.tumblr.com/">http://strangeandsombre.tumblr.com/</a>
</p><p>Please Note: Rated M for unavoidable sexytimes, violence, mild horror, general horribleness from evildoers and a lot of purple prose. (I would be honored if you give this little story your attention past the first chapter, it's probably the weakest unfortunately).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She came from the shadows, but when the band of moonlight fell across her face, Laura could see that she was dark, in a brooding kind of way, and utterly beautiful. Her loveliness was indescribable, so much so that Laura was frozen in place, staring at her. Her hair was dark and glossy in the dim light, her eyes were a dark liquid ink and they stared intensely, refusing to let the gaze between them drop. She moved deliberately and silently, catlike. Swiftly she came towards Laura, almost like a ghost, her tapering, slender fingers rising slowly up as though she was pointing at something or someone, her bare arms pale in the silver light.

It took a split second for Laura to realise the girl was moving too fast towards her and by the time she thought to flinch and politely step back from the beautiful stranger invading her personal space, those slim fingers had already somehow, shockingly, tangled in Laura's hair, hands cradling her head, pulling her insistently, and soft lips were kissing hers, really kissing, kissing her all over, frantically, as though they were long lost lovers meeting again after an absence. It felt strangely familiar and alien at the same time.

"Mmmf!" said Laura in sudden surprise, flailing a little at the onslaught, her arms everywhere, before her eyelids grew heavy with want and confusion all mixed up and her mouth opened, panting hard. She felt cold lips sliding over hers and sucking her bottom lip with a tug and a gentle bite, as the strange girl let out a low, throaty laugh. A feeling of terrifying joy was starting somewhere very much below the pit of Laura's stomach and jolted her hips forward, crashing into this body she knew so well yet didn't know at all. She was pinned there by a strong, slender arm that slid along her back until a cool hand caressed the skin there, teasing lightly. Laura shivered and trembled at a desire she didn't understand. She clung to this silent, beautiful girl who held her in her arms, her eyes closed, breathing heavily as though she'd run a mile a minute. It felt safe to be held like that... dangerously safe.

They kissed in the moonlight at first, before the stranger pressed against her body, pushing her closer and closer to the shadow of the trees. Laura took a step back, and then another. The stranger murmured something low and soft and laughed against her skin again, but Laura couldn't make out any of the words. The wanting feeling inside her was growing more urgent, more needy, and a moan escaped Laura's lips, just as she seemed to hear faint bells from a distance ringing over and over. Bells?

_Beep, beep, beep._

Laura awoke to a pillow being thrown at her head just as her hand hit the snooze button on her alarm crossly, clumsily.

"Some dream, roomie," said a voice, as though she was hearing it from underwater.

"No, no, no," moaned Laura, blindly hugging the pillow she was thrown and muffling her voice into it. She scrunched her eyes, trying to get back to sleep, back to the dream. But the bells were too loud and distracting.

"'Fraid so, Hollis," said the voice, getting clearer by the second, "You asked me to wake you for your 8:30am class otherwise I wouldn't dare disturb the moaning beast before me. Which by the way, I wanna hear about."

Laura opened one bleary eye to see Betty, mid-yoga pose, with one eyebrow raised, staring at her with amusement. Still the bells rang on. They were getting louder.

"That was some moan, Laura Hollis, don't be holding out on me," smirked Betty. "So how was dear old Danny?"

"Who?" said Laura, distractedly, still thinking of her dream and trying to fix the mysterious girl's face in her memory. That girl and her lips, oh god. She was blushing beet red. She could just about catch it, a glimpse of her face, if only Betty would. Just. Stop. Talking.

"Whoa! Back the truck up, girl!" said Betty in surprise, "You weren't dreaming of your tall, handsome gay TA? You know the one you've been going gaga over all semester? The one you can't stop talking about till you've driven your roommate insane? Which, by the way, I'm sure I'm not your first roommate, just saying."

Laura groaned and turned, dragging Betty's pillow over her face and hiding her red face.

"Shut up Betty Spielsdorf!" yelled Laura into the pillow. She kicked up a leg and let it fall with a thud on the bed in frustration.

"Girl, you got it bad for someone. That was the most - I mean that moan, oooh lady, I think everyone on this floor could hear it. Tell Betty all about it."

"Oh god, I'm gonna be late again, nooo! Why does this always happen to me?" said Laura suddenly, looking at her phone. She jumped out, nearly tripping over, flustered, trying to look anywhere but Betty's amused grin. "And I know Silas likes its traditions and all but why the hell do the carillon players have to play with their bells so early in the morning?"

"Yeah, no kidding, some of us are trying to sleep and get off to some mysterious person in our dreams they won't tell their sweet, lovely roommate about. Spill it."

"Betty, I'm late!"

"Okay, Hollis, but you won't avoid me this afternoon. Wanna have coffee? Roomie bonding time. There's a roommate code that says you tell me everything, every nasty detail, especially when it's sexual and really embarrassing for you. And do not put on that shirt Laura Hollis, for the love of all that's unholy. No. No. Yes, that one."

"Argh!" Rolling her eyes at a grinning Betty, Laura dashed out the door.

* * *

 

Laura so far had managed to avoid Betty that afternoon, who was always forgetting that she'd lined some boy or other up for a study session, and with this distraction, forgot to text Laura about getting coffee. Which was good because Laura couldn't bear to be interrogated about the dream she'd had this morning. It was weird to feel loyalty to a dream but she felt as if the girl in her dream would have hated to have everything out in the open. She seemed so mysterious, though it was not as though Laura had anything to base that on. They didn't exactly do that much talking. Laura blushed suddenly and then felt silly for worrying about a dream.

But today Laura had to get through an 18 hour work day, which she did semi-successfully, until the weird yet highly interesting dream she'd had faded away into the background. It was not until she got home to an empty room before it came to mind again, and even then it was tinged with regret. It wasn't as though she'd have the same dream again, no one she knew could dream on command and certainly not her, who, if she dreamed, usually dreamed of being late with her assignments or getting some question wrong on her exam paper.

Betty was still gone when Laura went to bed. She was tired, bone tired from her day, and dropped off to sleep immediately.

* * *

 

She was staring into the girl's eyes, and the girl was smiling at her, some kind of secret, sultry smile. Okay it was weird, because no one had ever smiled that way at Laura, not even Danny the tall gay TA she'd been crushing on. It wasn't bad weird, just... Laura had never felt this way before. It didn't make sense that some totally hot imaginary stranger would find her remotely attractive like this, did it?

"Hey," said Laura, a little awkwardly, because she could never not be awkward, even in her own dream.

"Hey," said the girl softly, in dry amusement, tilting her head and bending a little to lock eyes with her. Timidly, Laura wanted to look away but the gaze was too intense for her to break away. Laura trembled as those eyes stared back at her, unreadable.

The girl tucked Laura's hair behind her ear, still smiling her secret smile, and moved closer, but more slowly this time, her finger trailing along Laura's jawline, teasing. As she got closer, Laura looked up at her, trying to memorize her features, until she half closed her eyes, expecting a kiss. Wanting a kiss. But when the kiss came, her eyes flew open in confusion, for the girl had kissed the tip of her nose. Then kissed the bridge of her nose, before moving to her eyebrows, forehead, every part of Laura's face but her lips was being thoroughly and gently kissed until the girl took an earlobe between her lips and sucked, hard. Laura moaned again at this, without being able to help it, just as those cool lips started nibbling down her neck, making her shiver, until she felt the light scrape of teeth against her skin, and she froze a little. The kissing stopped then, hesitantly, but Laura could feel the girl's cheek caressing her skin softly, nuzzling. Oh god. Laura's face was burning up with blushing and she shrunk into herself a little. What was she doing here? Freud would have a field day with this second dream. This was not her at all, she would never kiss a stranger she'd just met - and they hadn't even been introduced yet!

"Uh -" started Laura, and even in the dream felt she was being ridiculous. Was now the time to start introducing herself? If Betty was there she'd be egging her on. _"Girl, go get some, whew! It's about time,"_  she'd say. There was no room for awkward introductions and talk and learning about each other. That was for real life. _"I think you might be missing the point of these kinds of dreams, Hollis,"_ Betty would say.

But the girl was holding her gently, rubbing her tense shoulders and back until she relaxed. Now this beautiful girl with her secret smile was slowly but insistently backing her up until Laura felt the rough bark of a tree behind her and could go no further. Laura froze again. Why did this feel so real? Ow! She'd scraped her palm against the bark and it had snagged against a splinter.

With some concern, the girl dragged her eyes from Laura and pulled her hand slowly up. A thin streak of blood was visible in small droplets on her palm. To her shock, the strange girl slowly pulled Laura's hand towards her lips and dragged the tip of her tongue across the streak, kissing her palm with an open mouth, sucking a little. Oh god, her hand had some connection to some other part of her body, deep, deep inside her. She was shaking so hard. This was crazy.

Laura wasn't sure what she should be feeling about this, but she knew what her body was feeling. Her hands, all by themselves, grabbed this insanely gorgeous person and pulled her body towards her. The girl laughed her throaty laugh then and sunk her body into Laura's till they were almost touching at every point, hips pressing against each other. Finally, finally, the strange, wordless girl bent down and kissed her lips, licking tentatively, nibbling, sliding their lips together till everything was a warm, wanting mess. Laura whimpered and the girl murmured appreciatively, smiling through the kissing. Laura's face was being cupped by soft, cool hands, caressed by a gentle thumb. Laura almost couldn't breathe with all the confusing things she was feeling. Her face, her entire body, had never felt so hot.

She broke away, panting as the girl lay her forehead against hers. She couldn't see her eyes clearly at this close range, but she could hear her.

"Next time," the girl murmured, in a low, silky voice, "you'll have to tell me your name, cupcake."

The bells were ringing by then, louder and louder, insistently, merging in with the sirens, and the loud voices shouting at her.

"Hollis! Yo!"

"Wake up frosh, your hair's on fire!"

"Laura, I don't know how you can sleep through this din, it's amazing but really, you have to get up now."

"Maybe if we tickle her nose."

"You do it."

"No you."

"I'll do it. With my pinkie. I'll be gentle. Laura. Lauuura."

Laura sneezed and her eyes opened to find Danny hovering over her, retracting a pinkie guiltily.

"Whaa-?" said Laura in confusion. "Danny, what are you doing here?"

"Fire drill," said Perry, from behind Danny. "I'm really amazed you slept through all this noise."

"Luckily Danny came by with her pinkie, who knows how else we would have done it," smirked Betty.

"We've been trying to wake you for ages. I was ready to take a bloody sample, frosh, to check if you were alive. Looks like you got an open cut on your palm so I could easily have done it in your sleep. Relax! This won't hurt a bit!" And LaFontaine suddenly waved around an extra large syringe.

"Hey! No! Don't you... just check people's pulses to see if they're alive? Or like, with mirrors? You know, like how they check to see if vampires breathe? Or something?" Vampires, where did that come from? Laura was so confused, she was babbling.

"Yeah, but blood samples are so much more fun." LaFontaine grinned.

"Su - LaFontaine, that's enough, stop scaring all the froshes."

"If they're having a fire drill why are the carillonists still playing the bells?" said Laura blearily, holding her head. The bells seemed to be ringing inside her head.

"Oh well they only have so much time to practise for the jubilee so they have a special dispensation. But you know, for the rest of us the drill is pretty serious, so come on everyone, hurry up. We don't want to keep the Dean waiting."

As they filed out the door, Laura still in her pyjamas with the baby owls all over them, Betty nudged her.

"You owe me, roomie," she smiled wickedly, "I told them you'd been having a lot of nightmares lately. Accounting for all your _very_ interesting sounds. Which, by the way, I'm still waiting to hear about."

"Ssh!"

"Don't ssh me, Hollis. Who was she? Come on, I'm dying here. You know I'm not going to stop asking."

Laura looked ahead to where Danny was walking with Perry and LaFontaine. Danny looked behind her, caught Laura's eye, and winked. Laura stopped in her tracks again, blinking in confusion. Did she really just... ?

"Oh no, come on, you crazy fool," said Betty, dragging her. "Spill it, Hollis. I've got plenty of time."

"I don't know," said Laura, helplessly. "Just a dream person. I'd never seen her before. She had dark hair, a little taller than me, dark eyes. Pale skin. She called me cupcake?"

"Whoa, that's funny," said Betty, frowning a little, "and by funny, I mean super weird. I mean, I kinda had a dream last month with a dark haired girl in it. She called me cupcake too."

"I thought you liked boys?" said Laura in confusion.

"What's that got to do with it?" Betty grinned suddenly, "Oh my god, get your mind out of the gutter Laura. It wasn't like that. Actually it was kinda weirder than that. She wanted to be my friend, or something, kept trying to give me something, or take something from me, I can't remember which, but then I don't remember much more than that. I do remember that there was no moaning. Ahem."

"That is super weird," Laura said slowly. Betty hooted at this.

Laura smiled faintly. She felt too odd to laugh at Betty's teasing. She suddenly felt very strange and brought her hand up to push her hair back, before she stopped short at the sight of her hand. There was a red streak on her palm, a scar of thin, dried blood. Oh. Even now she could remember the way that beautiful, mysterious girl had licked, slowly and languidly, across her palm. She had to stop herself from shivering. The dream had seemed so real, and now there was this. Could she have done this in her sleep without realizing? Scraped her palm on a loose nail on the bed frame or something?

"Does it matter?" Betty was saying, "Silas is all about the weird, I've totally stopped counting how many of the weird coincidences there are. Like I had a study date with Jason the other day and then Dan showed up and apparently I had a study date with him as well and then they turned out to be twin brothers! Who knew?! We probably ate the same expired cupcakes from the dining hall that day. It was just a dream. Just glad you enjoyed it Laura... so very very much...mmmm," she laughed and gave Laura a gentle bump with her shoulder before catching up with the others.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura meets the mysterious girl in her dreams, but this time the rookie reporter has questions she wants answered. Doesn't quite end how she expects...

"Hi," said Laura shyly, drying her nervous palms surreptiously against her hips, even though she was pretty sure she knew what was going to happen.

"Hello to you too, cutie," smiled the girl. She came closer, they both did, quickly as though drawn by magnets and unable to keep away from each other.

Her lips were so soft and gentle, the tip of her tongue tentative against Laura's. Hands were sliding against Laura's back, pulling her close. She leaned in closer as their mouths kissed. It felt perfect, she felt, for the first time, as though she belonged somewhere, everything fit. But she still had time to think how weird this was. These dreams she'd been having did not make any sense, it was ridiculous. They didn't know each other. Laura was curious why it was that night after night, she'd been dreaming of the same imaginary girl. Where had she come from? This was bordering on the obsessive. She'd never seen an imaginary person in her dreams so clearly before, so real. She felt so solid, and soft, with some strange sweet floral scent lingering around her that Laura couldn't place, but that was intoxicating.

"Wait," she whispered against the strange girl's lips, but kissing her back, unable to help herself.

"Hmm?" the girl murmured, nibbling and sucking on her bottom lip, her tongue slipping in, exploring. Oh god, it was warm and wet and wonderful. Laura whimpered and the girl smiled against her lips. No, no wait, Laura wanted to know, she did. She had to know.

"Wait," she said a little louder, trying to move away, and failing. Her mouth was stopped with a kiss, then another. But Laura couldn't help wanting to know the answer to things, wanting explanations for mysteries, and these dreams, if nothing else, were a mystery. It had always been a major flaw of hers while awake, curiosity at inappropriate times. Well, here in dreamland there were no cats for curiosity to kill. What could it hurt?

"Wait, wait, wait!" she pushed back, panting hard.

"Oh, what?" groaned the mystery girl, in a low growl that was possibly the most attractive sound Laura had ever heard, in her dreams or anywhere for that matter. "You're killing me here, cupcake." She moved back a little and Laura saw that her eyes were looking a little dazed and heavy, her rosy lips were parted slightly. _She_ was looking dazed?

"Why are you always kissing me?" asked Laura, as awkwardly as only Laura knew how. "Why are you always in my dreams?"

The girl raised a finely arched eyebrow and looked both perplexed and incredulous that Laura would even ask that question, particularly at this time.

"Seriously? Why am I always in your dreams? Why are _you_ always in _my_ dreams, sunshine?" the girl said with dry amusement. "And why wouldn't I kiss you? What kind of a - It's not every day I see someone like you in my dreams, I thought I should make the most of it. Newsflash: it's a dream! I didn't know when you'd disappear, creampuff. What do you expect?" And then she gave Laura an obnoxious pat on the head and a kiss on her nose.

"Wait, what?" said Laura, dazed at what she'd just heard.

"And... just my luck to dream about a chatty cupcake who wants to make small talk instead," the strange girl sighed heavily, dramatically, "This is not how these dreams are supposed to work, dream girl. I specifically ordered a dream where we'd just make out. With no talking." She glared hard at Laura, who was too caught up in her mission for the truth to notice.

"No wait, what do you mean, someone like me?" said Laura, confused, holding onto the point and not letting go. "You're the imaginary dream girl, I mean it makes sense that I would dream of you, I mean look at you, with that black lace - ok, wow. You're the most stunningly beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life. Anyone would dream of you. And I'm -" Laura trailed off lamely, not knowing where to look. There was a beat.

"Oh," said the girl, smiling a little shyly. Well, that was unexpected. She slid a finger along Laura's jawline, watching it trail downwards to her neck, until Laura looked up again.

"You think so?" she said softly, "But you know, I could say the same of you, so where's your grand theory now, sweetheart?" Her voice was low and smoky as she ran her fingers gently through Laura's glossy honey hair, playing with it. Laura trembled at the touch, her eyes closed, concentrating on breathing normally. Then her eyes opened as she realized.

"Wait, you think I'm imaginary? Like in your imagination you'd dream of someone who looks like me? And that's okay? I mean, you're not disappointed it's me?"

Laura expected the girl to say something dry and snarky, or laugh or mock her or something other than what she did. The beautiful girl looked at her carefully, as though memorizing all her features. There was an odd expression on her serious face, almost like fondness. Laura saw her eyes, sad dark eyes they were, shimmering in the light, almost as though she was about to shed tears or something. But she didn't cry, instead she leaned close and placed a soft kiss against her cheek.

"I'm not disappointed," she whispered in her ear. Laura released a breath she wasn't aware she'd been holding.

"Oh. _Ooh_!" Her eyes widened, and she could help the slow smile blossoming all over her face. She couldn't help feeling smug now. "So you, um, maybe sorta like me. Okay!" The girl smiled ruefully back, shaking her head and rolling her eyes at Laura.

"Okay?" she asked gently, before sighing a little. "Well. I sure know how to pick them." She arched her eyebrow and looked skeptical. But by this time Laura's face had caught fire, and bashful, she didn't know where else to turn but to press her face close into the crook of the strange girl's neck, who laughed in response and wrapped her arms around Laura, tight and secure.

"I thought this was supposed to be more than just a PG-rated dream," the girl smiled against Laura's hair. "We're wasting time, sweetheart."

"Hey, it's my dream and if I want to cuddle with an imaginary girl I met here, I will," retorted Laura into her neck.

"It's actually my dream, imaginary princess, but fine, have it your own way." She nuzzled into Laura's hair. "I don't cuddle much in real life. Not the cuddly type."

Laura lifted her head to stare into the girl's eyes at this.

"I don't even know your name. If you're real, who are you? Why are we in each other's dreams? Who are you?"

The mystery girl smiled slowly, wonderfully at Laura, whose heart was beating faster and faster, and opened her mouth to speak.

Suddenly, Laura saw her expression change, hardening to something like panic and fury, a face that frightened her, really frightened her. The girl's muscles had tensed into some kind of fight or flight mode. Before she knew it, the strange girl pulled her bodily further into the shadow of the trees by the dream road they were on, as though she was a mere feather.

"Don't look, don't look," she ordered roughly, twisting and cradling Laura's head away from the road, not at all gentle now. She suddenly bent down and kissed her, just as roughly, hungrily devouring her, her tongue slipping inside and exploring wherever it wanted until Laura was limp and breathless and had closed her eyes as a matter of course, kissing her back hard, passionately, without knowing what she was doing. Some strange thrall had descended on her, electric jolts coursed through her every nerve as competing feelings of utter fear and utter desire warred within her. She gasped. Her hips pushed against the girl, wanting her, even as her head blared urgent warning alarms at her.

The second she managed to open one heavy eyelid, even as she was being kissed frantically, her whole body hidden behind this mysterious girl, a massive black car, glossy and shining in the moonlight, drove slowly by, almost silently, threateningly. Laura shrank behind the girl's immoveable shoulder, but even without seeing it go by she could feel the waves of evil flow over her from the body of the car as it drove on, surrounding them like a cloud of invisible poison. The lips that were kissing her again were trembling. Arms gripped her tightly, hands soothed her back in circles.

What was this doing in her dream? And what was this girl doing to her? This wasn't a joke anymore. She pulled away, or tried too, but the girl's arms still held her quiet. The girl's head turned slightly as she watched the black car passing them. When she turned her face back, it was frightened and apologetic at the same time, and this was unnerving. Laura was more scared than she could remember, and lashed out in fear.

"What the hell was that?!" she burst out, trying to push the girl away. "What did you do to me?"

"I'm sorry -" the strange girl started, and she was shaking, her distracted hands still rubbing Laura's back, but then she trailed off as though she was thinking of something else, listening to something else. Her jaw clenched over and over. She ran a nervous hand through her hair.

"Oh no, you did not just pull the I'll Just Kiss a Random Girl to Hide From Someone I'm Avoiding routine on me," said Laura furiously, clinging to whatever explanation was normal. She couldn't help pushing the girl's shoulder with a light punch. "You hurt me! You scared me! What was that? Who was that? An ex?"

"I'm sorry, cupcake" the girl said dully, her shoulder barely moving as Laura shoved her. "I'm sorry. Even in a dream, I knew this would -"

She looked up, and saw Laura's eyes clouded in confusion, angry and frightened and not understanding, not wanting to understand. She reached for Laura's face, who instinctively flinched. Her expression changed yet again, into something cold and unreadable, giving a mirthless laugh, as if she didn't care, just as they heard the car stop not too far away. A car door opened, and then closed with a deliverate slam. Footsteps crunching towards them, slow and deliberate. The dream girl closed her eyes for an instant, seeming to take a deep breath, before opening them and staring at Laura intently, with eyes that were deep and piercing.

"Can you really blame me, cupcake? You give it up so easily," she drawled with an aggravating smile that never reached her eyes. "I don't expect you'll ever want to see me again after this, even in my dreams." She leaned down close to Laura's face towards her ear, grinning cheekily, dangerously. Her voice was a low growl now and Laura, frozen in fear, had to strain to hear the words. "But if you want me..." She quickly flicked a look in the direction of the car "... come find me." The girl suddenly bared her teeth, and quickly sank the fangs that glistened in the moonlight deep into Laura's neck, sucking hard.

Laura screamed, more with surprise and fear than with pain, and her screams merged with the bells, the ever ringing bells that rang out incessantly in her head.

* * *

 

"Laura!" called a frantic voice, "Laura, Laura, it's just a dream. Wake up, it's just a dream! You're okay! Shh, you're okay." A door banged.

"Is she okay? What was that noise?"

"She just started screaming suddenly. Scared the hell outta me."

"It's those nightmares you mentioned. It's those nightmares, right?"

"Um, yeah, right, the nightmares, right."

Laura opened her eyes in the din of the bells and her friends calling out at her, looking anxiously down at her. Her neck, god, her neck. She could feel it.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" She said, flustered, clapping her hand to her neck.

"What's - what's that on your neck, Laura?"

"Laura, what's wrong?"

"Oh my god! My dad is going to kill me!" She leapt up and ran to the mirror. She could see it clearly, a vicious bite mark, red and raw on her neck.

She ran around flustered, not knowing what to do, her hands shaking, holding onto a wooden spoon she'd picked up from the dish rack in shock. Was she losing blood? Oh god, she was losing blood. Yep. Blood. What was she going to do? She tapped her head with the spoon a little, trying to calm herself, holding it to her head like a talisman. 

"She got bitten by a spider or something in the night it looks like. Whoa, roomie, don't do that."

"Spiders?! Spiders on my floor?" said Perry anxiously. "Laura, do you have bandaids? I have bandaids, do you need bandaids? Laf, run and get the first aid kit."

"Laura, stop. Stop running around like a headless chicken. What is up with you girl?" Betty took the wooden spoon from her hands and handed her a face towel to press into her neck. "Ah, it looks bad, it's bleeding."

Betty took one look at Laura's pale face and brightened her tone.

"Don't worry roomie, spider bite could happen to anyone. Hey, I'm just glad it happened to you and not me. Which, by the way, thank you." Betty wrapped a long arm around Laura's hunched shoulders and gave her an affectionate shake.

But Laura wasn't in the mood for laughing. She looked up at Betty, her eyes big and starting to brim with tears.

"She bit me," said Laura in fear, "Betty, she bit me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this doesn't disappoint! I'd love more comments about what you think is going on if you have time. :)
> 
> Thanks for reading and commenting.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caution: some Laura + Danny scenes for those who do not like them together, I give you fair warning.

Laura didn't sleep for the next two nights.

"Well, I'm planning to do some late night laundry and then a spot of cleaning if you want to join me," offered Perry, looking at Laura with some concern. "I mean I can poke you with the duster if you start dropping off."

"I just got a new specimen to dissect in the lab, it'll be way cool, frosh. You should join. Plus, then maybe I can take a blood sample from that bite of yours!" LaFontaine was nothing if not enthusiastic. "Hey! I can poke you with this syringe if you start fading fast."

But all of that got old pretty quickly.

It was the third night, and Laura wasn't sure how she was going to stay awake, especially after all her 18 hour work days. She was desperate to stay awake, to never experience fear like she had again. After two days the bite mark had healed somewhat, but she was still in freaked out mode and had refused to think about how it got there or really to answer any questions, no matter how many times LaFontaine probed her for answers. Denial, denial, denial. If it was good enough for Egypt, it was good enough for her.

In the back of her head she somehow knew, without being able to admit it to herself, that she had another, much greater fear. That she actually craved these intense feelings, just like that fear. Fear of desire, fear of the unknown, fear of running into danger, fear of never being able to overcome terrors on her own. Laura was never going to be the person who did the rescuing, she just wasn't strong enough, too small, too childish, too foolish, that's what they always told her.

Now that she was away from home, away from the cotton wool life her dad had put her in, she often felt reckless, she wanted to break out somehow, but early training to watch out, be careful, follow the rules, made it hard for her to make a clean break with safety.

Laura sighed and rubbed her bleary eyes. God she was so tired. She pinched herself on the arm and jolted upright.

"I would totally stay up with you again, Laura, totally, totally," yawned Betty, "but I've been feeling super tired lately. I'm getting a _[yawn]_ reputation for falling asleep everywhere. Which, by the way, I'm not down with. No, no, NO, girl. We got parties to go to, I take university verr serrusly..." And with that she was out like a light. Laura sighed.

Danny. Her name popped up like a saviour.

"So what I'm hearing, Hollis, is that you'd like me to keep you up all night," smiled Danny. "I think that'd be something we can collaborate on. We'd make a good team." Oh. Was Danny fl- ... was that... what was that?

But suggestive words from Danny the swoon-worthy TA now didn't quite have the same impact as it might have done a week ago. A week ago she was still trying to take surreptitious shots of Danny in action around campus with her camera... creepy spywork masquerading as Laura's journalism blog on Silas current events was so much harder when your dad only let you have a flip phone.

"So, you wanna come over to Summer Society House? I'll come pick you up. It's not safe for you to be walking in the dark alone."

And now, if an imaginary dream girl, even a nightmarish one, was getting in the way of her feelings for Danny, Laura had to wonder if it had even been a crush she'd had. But of course it was, she was just skeeved out now, by what had happened. Laura felt so confused, so mixed up inside with fear and loathing and desire. It was not acceptable that she should still feel the rough and breathless kiss of mysterious lips on her lips. Especially lips that didn't even exist, much less lips that were prone to misbehave outrageously. God, it seemed so real. But it wasn't.

Danny, bright and beautiful, full of health and vitality and a smile like warm sunshine - who wouldn't hero worship her a little? She did everything well, she was so fit and she was smart and well-read and so caring and brave enough to stand up to those zeta bro jerks when someone needed protecting. There was something wrong with her if she wasn't crushing on this gorgeous girl. At least she was real and you could depend on her not to bite you in the neck every time a car drove by.

Laura sighed. She had to stop thinking about a mystery girl who didn't even exist. It was just a dream. Her body was not allowed to remember what it felt like, to be desired. It was not. She raised her hand to her neck without thinking, touching the mark there, rubbing the bandaid. Like many things at Silas, it was something she couldn't explain.

"Laura? Earth to Laura! Hello, are you in there?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Stop touching that spider bite, or it'll never heal and you'll be marked forever." grinned Danny. "We don't want that now, do we? I said I'll come pick you up. Summer Society's a bit more comfortable than your dorm room."

"Okay," said Laura, distracted. She pulled her hand away, suddenly feeling small and helpless like she did with her dad, who was forever full of good ideas for what Laura shouldn't be doing if she didn't want to fall into another scrape and hurt herself badly. Oh god, dad. He'd be so upset and she could never tell him. How could she even begin to explain? What was there even to tell? That a dream frightened her and she woke up with a mark on her neck, bleeding?

"You should drink some soy milk or something, you're looking a little pale. And no more of those cookies, Hollis, they're so bad for you."

"Yeah, you're right," sighed Laura. But she felt a twinge of irritation. Danny often forgot she wasn't the TA of Laura's life. It was a small price to pay, Danny was great company otherwise. They had so much in common, so much to talk about. Not like some others.

"Okay so see you soon?" Laura disconnected the Skype call and just like that, Danny was gone.

"Oh my god, Hollis, does Danny know she's not the boss of you?" mumbled Betty from across the room. "Doesn't she know it's a frosh requirement to live entirely on cookies? Ugh, she's so wholesome she makes my teeth hurt."

"I thought you were asleep! Sorry, I should have put on my headphones."

"I am asleep," said Betty's muffled voice, "but you know as soon as I hear the sweet dulcet tones of gorgeous gay Danny's voice, I just go all gooey and can't help myself. It happens to the best of us."

Groggily, she propped herself on an elbow, blinking.

"Sure you don't wanna stay up with me?" said Laura in a small voice, picking at the pages of an open textbook.

"Oh Laura, I would love to but I am so beat, I don't know what's the matter with me, cause honey, I literally am the laziest girl on the planet -"

"I know, you're tired, you should rest. I'm a bad roomie. I'm sorry you've been feeling so tired. Maybe you're coming down with something."

"You'll have fun with Tall Gay Danny, I'm sure she'll take your mind off evil dream girl. And tomorrow, we'll talk? In the sunshine the nightmares will go away, seriously. Which, by the way, it might help for you to tell me a leetle more about. What even happened?"

"I can't right now. It was just - I just -"

"Yeah, I know. Okay well, I'm here if you need me... unless I'm at a party. That takes priority." Betty fell back onto her pillow, shielding her eyes with the back of her hand as though the light from Laura's laptop hurt her, just as Laura tossed a pillow at her.

"You're awful." Betty chuckled tiredly.

"Enjoy Tall Gay Danny, this night will be like a dream come true for you," she smirked.

"It's not like that!"

"Suure, it isn't. Tell that to your shrine. Well, well, speak of the devil," said Betty as there was a knock on the door. She shut her eyes, smirking widely and cooing in a ridiculous voice "G'night, roomie. G'night Tall Gay Danny."

"Argh!" Laura made a strangled noise in her throat and rolled her eyes in frustration, her cheeks flaming red. If Danny heard...! Clearing her throat, she called out "I'm coming!" Her voice was overly enthusiastic.

"Okay!" replied Danny's muffled voice on the other side, copying her cadence.

* * *

 

"I like night walks when the air is cool like this, don't you?" said Danny as they headed towards Summer Society House. "With the moonlight too, all silvery. It's magical. Makes Silas look not quite as disreputable."

"Yeah," said Laura, trying to sound more eager than she felt. Moonlight. Magic. Her. She shook her head clear. Gah! Stop thinking about her!

"Whoa, watch out," said Danny, putting her hand on Laura's lower back and steering her bodily out of the way of a small puddle. Mystery girl pushing her up against a tree and kissing her from here to the end of next week. When Danny pushed her it felt like her overprotective dad. What was wrong with her? She should love that Danny cared enough about her to look out for her. But it was frustrating too. She wasn't a precious little doll, why did everyone treat her like one?

"Danny, it's a puddle, I can walk over it," said Laura dryly. Danny laughed.

"I know, I'm just trying to be thoughtful, and a puddle is as good a reason as any to -" Danny casually dropped her arm over Laura's shoulders. Oh. Laura cleared her throat and a strangled whimpering sound came out of it.

"You wanna, maybe sit out here a while and enjoy the moon?" said Danny, smiling at Laura.

"Oh, sure," said Laura faintly. God, what was wrong with her, she should be falling over herself and squealing right now. Determined, she sat close to Danny and leaned against her. Danny felt warm next to her, solid. Safe. Danny's arm felt heavy and leaden on her shoulders.

"So why do you want to stay up all night again? What for?"

"Um, for science?" said Laura feebly. Danny laughed again. Her laugh was actually quite cute. Laura smiled at her.

"For science, right. I thought you were a journalism major?"

"Journalists can be interested in science too Danny," retorted Laura, as Danny held up a hand in mock surrender. Danny was funny too, and sweet. There was nothing wrong with her, nothing at all. Gazing into her eyes, Laura felt the sudden urge to talk, to explain, to have someone understand her. "I don't know, have you ever had an experience that was kinda disturbing so it made you afraid to go to sleep?"

"Hmm, sounds serious," said Danny, considering. Her thumb was stroking Laura's shoulder. It tickled a little. "I've had nightmares that were pretty bad, especially when I was a kid. So you had a nightmare and now you don't wanna go to sleep?"

"Something like that."

"Well, you know what you need is to rest in some kind of a safe, secure environment. Maybe if you took a nap and I was, er, with you, it wouldn't be so scary. I'm pretty good at scaring away the monsters," said Danny, smiling down at her. Laura's neck was aching at that angle, looking up at Danny. She let her head fall against Danny's shoulder and Danny's arm tightened around her. This was good. Safe. She felt so tired.

"Just try closing your eyes for a bit, Laura, Laura," Danny whispered to her softly. "You'll be safe, I promise. I'll be here to watch over you." Laura's heavy eyelids fluttered downwards. She could feel Danny's warm breath tease her eyelashes as she drifted off.

* * *

 

Laura stood in the moonlight in front of a grave. Trees and their uncertain shadows surrounded her as she stood in the clearing which contained nothing more than the grave and herself. Grass grew around the tombstone which had been left uncared for and had fallen into decay. Lichen marked the chiselled letters, which read simply:

 

**Mircalla Karnstein**

**1680 - 1698**

**R.I.P**

 

Some poor eighteen year old girl. Where the hell was she? To dream of a grave was not helping her night terrors. _Danny, wake me up, please_ , Laura pleaded in her head. Then she stilled herself. Her scalp crinkled in fear as out of the corner of her eye she saw something black flash past. Dreaming or not, it was terrifying. Her skin began to tickle as goosebumps rose and the hair on the back of her neck stood up. Oh no.

She felt something behind her, even before she heard the voice.

"Know you this maiden?" asked the low, careless tones of the girl she knew. That voice was still pure attraction for Laura. She couldn't help shivering. But when she looked over, somehow the girl looked different. She wore different clothes, of a different period. It was a black dress of some sort, in rich fabrics but rather sombre, as though she had come from a funeral.

"Hey," she said, unable to help herself, trying to breathe normally. She flicked a look at the girl's lips quickly. The figure in black looked at her, puzzled, with no recognition in her eyes.

"You have the advantage of me, fräulein, have we been introduced?" The tones were haughty, cold and icy. Not at all friendly. _Danny, please, why did you let me sleep? Danny, wake me._

"Do you know the family Karnstein?" asked the girl abruptly, in a tone that suggested she was used to people following her orders.

"No, I don't." Laura, feeling reckless, peered into the girl's eyes. Though the expression in them was outwardly empty and almost seemed inhuman, there was a depth to them, and Laura searched for some sign that the dream girl she'd known for so short a time, yet so intimately, was in there. This new mystery girl seemed slightly taken aback by Laura staring at her, and turned her head away, disconcerted.

"Who was she?" asked Laura curiously.

"A young maiden, like all other foolish maidens, much like yourself no doubt." The girl sounded disdainful. "A countess who thought too much of herself. She thought herself safe, invincible, and having never experienced the world, went to a ball where she was viciously slain." The mystery girl laughed soundlessly. It was dreadful.

"How very amusing. Good riddance, to someone who would have been witless enough to become a monster to others had she lived. Let her die a monster and have an end to it." The mystery girl almost spat out the words. There was a silence as the dream girl tugged at her elegant gloves repeatedly as if in frustration.

"She is to be pitied," said Laura, finally, surprising herself with those words. It didn't sound like her. She looked down and saw that she herself was wearing some period costume she was unfamiliar with. Was this some kind of weird cosplay thing? Who was she playing in this dream? Was she not herself, and was that why the girl didn't recognise her? Did that mean... did that mean that the dream girl had kissed someone else, someone who didn't look like her, all those dreams ago?

The girl was looking at her curiously now.

"Do I know you, my lady?"

"Do you not remember me?" said Laura, a little peeved, though there was no reason why the girl should, especially if she was someone else in this dream. Still, she was upset that their moments had obviously meant more to her than it did an imaginary girl, which was ridiculous, and at the same time her gaze dropped down to the girl's lips. She couldn't look away. This did not go unnoticed as the girl raised an eyebrow.

"I think I would remember a charming beauty such as yourself," the girl smiled, but it was a sly smile, and the unsubtle flirting made Laura apprehensive rather than flattered.

"However, there is all the time in the world for us to get to know one another... as intimately as you would wish it, my lady." With this, the mystery girl bared her teeth in a dreadful, wide smile and started walking closer with deliberately slow steps. She meant to seem menacing, and she was succeeding.

If Laura had not experienced this before, half expecting this, she would have been more shocked and afraid. It was less scary the second time round but still nothing to take lightly. _Damn it Danny, why did you let me sleep? Please, please wake me up._  Nothing. Damn it, she was just going to have to stall for time.

"Uh, that's fine. I'm fine. Thank you though!" babbled Laura, walking quickly behind the tombstone. "I just remembered I have somewhere to be. Like yesterday."

"Truly, your speech is passing strange," said the girl, suddenly puzzled and surprised that Laura seemed unafraid of her. She continued walking slowly towards her. "I must be a fool to - Yet there is something about you... From whence do you hail? Who are your people?"

"Crap, how the crap do you walk in these gowns!" Laura muttered to herself, flicking the excess fabric around and stumbling. The girl raised both eyebrows now in amazement as Laura pulled up her petticoats and her ankles came into view.

"My lady - who are you? You amuse me and interest me greatly. Won't you speak with me a while? Sweetling, I would know your name."

"Honestly, I'm sure there are better things you have to do with your time, I wouldn't want to be a bother." Laura laughed nervously as she moved till the grave was between them. Something like a genuine smile danced around the girl's lips, her fangs hidden now from view.

"No, indeed, the life of a lady is one of leisure as you well know, with not much to do but read novels and learn ancient Sumerian. I have plenty of time to indulge on my lady of mystery," smiled the girl. This time her eyes seemed amused. "I regret if my behavior was too cold earlier. I do not often speak to people, I forget how. Sweetling, why do you run from me? I would be friends with you." She continued to circle the grave, following Laura without haste and without the clumsiness that Laura had with her skirts. She looked on in amusement as Laura kicked her skirts away.

"Oh you know, one... one always needs exercise, doesn't one, cooped up in these things. Don't you find?" Laura's voice had grown high pitched, she almost squeaked. Whoops, she almost tripped. The mystery girl was outright laughing now, a sound of silvery joy that had Laura's heart twisting against itself in confusion. Blushing, Laura couldn't help but smile at her, which seemed to surprise the girl greatly. Her laugh merged with the curious sound of bells that were getting louder and louder. Oh.

The laugh died on the girl's lips as she reached out a slender hand towards Laura.

"Wait, do not leave me! Please."

The last memory Laura had of the dream was that of sad, dark eyes full of loneliness and frustration looking back at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you guys think is going on? I would love some comments with your theories...


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens! Dum-dum-dum!

She was in Danny's bed, lying in the bright sunlight. Danny was still asleep next to her, an arm draped over her. Ookay... she did not remember this part of the evening at all.

The din of the bells from the old clocktower was much louder here at the Summer Society House than at the dorms. Apparently the practising carillonist this morning had decided to play "Time Warp" on the large bells, giving everyone an equal opportunity headache. Ugh. Charming. She wished they would stop practising every morning, dedication was one thing but this was going to drive her nuts.

"Danny," said Laura, dropping Danny's limp arm back on her side and shaking her awake. "Danny! Wake up!"

"Mmm?" murmured Danny. She yawned awake, smiling widely at Laura, happy to see her. Oh god, she was cute and so cool... but somehow things between them just didn't fit properly. Nothing seemed to make sense ever since scary dream girl had appeared on the scene.

"Oh damn, what time is it? I'm usually up by now for my morning run but I generally don't sleep so soundly. I guess it's not everyday I have someone so cute in my bed."

Laura brushed off the compliment impatiently, but not without some guilt.

"Why the hell did you let me sleep Danny?" asked Laura, frustrated. "It was really, really important for me to not sleep so deeply, I needed your help, I asked for your help. Why didn't you wake me?"

"Why, didn't you sleep well?" said Danny, distractedly blinking in the sunshine.

"No, Danny Lawrence, I didn't sleep well." Laura rolled her eyes. "How did I even get in your bed?" Because Laura sure as hell hoped nothing had happened while she was playing ring-o-rosy around a dead girl's grave with an impossibly gorgeous but possibly murderous sad-eyed dream girl. "Last I remembered I was just resting my eyes on your porch and you were supposed to make sure I didn't fall completely asleep."

"Well, you did fall asleep! So I carried you in and tucked you in bed. Don't worry, I made sure you were safe, I was here the whole time protecting you."

"And you let me keep sleeping? Danny! After what I said to you? About my disturbing nightmares? You do realise that protecting me physically doesn't actually protect me from the nightly terrors that have been infiltrating my sleep!"

Danny ran her hand through her hair in frustration, not understanding why Laura was making such a big deal out of this. She took a deep, patient breath.

"Yes Laura, you needed a lot of rest. You hadn't slept in two days. When you're that tired you're not going to be having nightmares, everyone knows that. And at the end of the day, they're just nightmares. They're not real, Laura. I thought it was more important that you get your sleep, so I didn't wake you. I don't think you're being very fair here, Laura. It was for your own good."

"You thought it was more important, I -" Laura was annoyed now, gesturing with her hands at every word and groaning in frustration. "Danny, I appreciate you trying to help but I don't need you to decide what's good for me. I don't need someone to think for me or save me from dangerous puddles. I don't need a knight in shining armour, I need a friend, Danny, a friend!"

A loud knock came and a blonde head looked in without waiting for an answer.

"Your friend's here," the girl said dryly. The girl raised an eyebrow at both of them in bed together. Laura noticed then that Danny had tensed up, looking away. "A girl." She looked at Laura, giving an irritated sigh. "Another girl."

There was some noise behind her, and the girl looked back.

"Oh, and two other randoms." She rolled her eyes and left.

"Who was that?"

"Elsie," said Danny shortly. She chanced a look at Laura. "We, um, might have dated once, it doesn't matter, she went all a bit weird after a while. But listen, Laura, I think I understand what you're saying but that's what I do, I'm good at protecting people I care about. I care about you. What's so wrong about that? I mean, is there something else you're not telling me, why are you so upset?"

There was a commotion at the door as footsteps dashed in.

"Laura! Laura, Laura, thank god you're here." It was Betty, completely flustered, out of character for her. She was followed by Perry and LaFontaine.

"I - er... welcome to my room guys?" Danny said awkwardly.

" _Now_ you know how I feel," muttered Laura to herself, gesturing at the invasion in the room. They did all barge into her room fairly frequently.

"Thanks Danny, that's a nice Laura you've got in your bed there," nodded LaFontaine. "We were kinda looking for one."

Betty ignored them both.

"Laura, girl, I saw her! Your cupcake dream girl with the seduction eyes, I saw her! Which, by the way, whoa, for a small town girl you sure dream big. Girl was hella hot in that -" Betty motioned up and down her body "-get up."

"Seduction eyes?" said Danny, her eyes widening, "What seduction eyes?! Who? What girl is this?" She flashed a look of upset confusion at Laura.

"What? Where - how?" Laura felt flustered at the idea of all of them talking about what had been a private dream between her and... dream girl.

"In my dreams last night, you know, I was out like a light, next thing I know I'm on this road, right, all shining in the moonlight, with some trees or woods or something to the side. And this dark figure was just standing there looking out at the road, like she was looking for someone, you know?"

"No way!"

"Exactly what I said, I said, 'No way!' and she turns and says 'Cupcake?' so that's how I knew it was her. She's rushing up to me, like she's freaking out or something -"

"You've been dreaming of some girl? This is your horrible nightmare that I was supposed to rescue you from??" fumed Danny. "After all your talk about being independent or whatever, this is just about another girl you can't get over?!"

Betty ignored her.

"So I said, 'No, bitch' -"

"Oh Betty, you didn't..." Laura placed one hand on Betty's arm, pressing her other hand to her temple. What with the bells playing loudly and her lack of sleep, and now this, her roommate taunting an angry bitey girl, a massive headache was definitely in full force.

"Yeah, no, bitch, that was my friend you were messing with. She's really upset, she can't sleep because of you. What the hell did you do to her? I mean, biting her? Really? And I pushed her, but she was like stone, she didn't move, she just laughed this really nasty laugh, just completely joyless, you know?"

"Wait, she bit you? That was some girl biting you, not a spider?"

"Whoa!"

"Exactly what I said, I said, 'Whoa, who even are you?' and she said, 'Nobody for you to mess with. I have no idea who you're talking about and I don't have time for this. God, why am I always surrounded by toddlers?!'" Betty was breathing heavily, she was talking so fast and took a moment to calm down.

"Anyway so I said, 'nobody messes with my friends and gets away with it', so then weirdly, she looks all sad and she sighs and says 'Tell your friend, I'm... tell her I wish things had been different. But I warn you and all your friends, never to go by Karnstein Hall again, whether awake or asleep.'

Then her ears prick up like she's listening for something, and then she says 'Oh goddammit, I hate this! Life is Hell!' all melodramatic, you know? And then she turns and says furiously 'Get out of this, you fool! If you know what's good for you' and she starts to push me towards the trees, but this black car stops on the road and I can't really see clearly but the tinted window rolls down and this creepy woman's voice says 'I see you've made a little friend. She looks a trifle familiar, dear. Won't you invite her in?' and then -"

Betty stopped to take another deep breath and suddenly looked pale as the blood left her face. All of a sudden, putting her hand to her forehead, she paused, leaning too much on one side, and fainted, sinking to the floor in a crumpled heap.

Laura screamed in shock.

"Betty, oh my god, oh my god, Betty!" She knelt down on the floor, pushing Betty's hair out of her face, not knowing exactly what to do.

"Quick, put her on the bed - Perry, run and get some water from the bathroom please, there's a pitcher just on my shelf there. Laf, help me." That was Danny, good old Danny, always efficient, always ready in an emergency. Laura felt more helpless than ever, but she got a magazine and started fanning Betty's face.

"That's good, give her some air, uh, Laura, don't overdo it! Oh god Perry-"

"I got the water!" said Perry, and in a panic, dumped it over Betty's face. Betty came to with a cough and a groan but seemed unable to speak coherently. Laura grabbed a towel to dry her off, until Betty stopped her with a shaking hand, wide-eyed.

"I'm just so tired all the time, Laura, what's wrong with me?" she murmured, as though she was struggling against some powerful drug. "I can't do anything anymore. I can feel it inside my head, ever since I came to Silas."

"Nothing, you just need rest, Betty, we're going to take care of you. Please, Betty, don't die on me or anything," said Laura in an anxious voice, at the brink of crying.

"Just so freaking tired. Laura, I think it touched my face. I couldn't breathe. Don't go back there. Please don't go." And Betty released her wrist and fell back.

"Has she fainted?"

"No, it looks like she's asleep, like properly asleep." Laura stroked Betty's hair, looking worried and scared. They all looked at each other, frightened in the bright morning sunshine.

"Ok," said Danny, holding up a hand, "care to tell us what the hell is going on here?"

* * *

 

"This is totally weird even for Silas," said LaFontaine. "So you've been having the same nightmares about this girl in the woods, by the road, whatever, right?"

"Um, yeeep. Yep, nightmares. Just nightmares. Nothing else." Laura cleared her throat.

"And two days ago in your dream she bites you on the neck and made you too frightened to go to sleep?"

"Right."

"What about the seduction eyes?" asked Danny.

"Oh, that was just Betty's little joke, you know how she jokes," said Laura lamely, laughing nervously. Danny didn't look convinced.

"Ok, let's think about this logically. We all know what this is right? Girl, with fangs, bites innocent little Laura here -"

"I'm not innocent! I mean, I know things! Lots of things!" Laura protested. LaFontaine looked at her and then continued.

"Girl, with fangs, bites not-so-innocent Laura here, seems soulless inside, wears black and lurks around at night. Vampire, yes? Vampire, vampire, vampire?"

"Laf, I don't think you can just jump to that conclusion. There are no such things as vampires. Lots of people like to lurk around the forest, late at night, dressed in black, and bite... young girls." Perry trailed off with some uncertainty.

"Right, Perr. So the really weird thing is, why are Laura and Betty both dreaming about the same fang girl?"

"And she met her before me too - about a month ago she thinks."

"And Betty said something about a warning that Mistress of the Overbite gave her - something about Karnstein Hall and never to go there?" Danny reminded them.

"Oh my god!" said Laura, remembering suddenly. "My dream last night - I saw a grave that had the name Karnstein on it! Mircalla Karnstein, that was the name. The girl said she was a monster and it was a good thing she was dead. Maybe she haunts the place? Karnstein Hall?"

"By driving up and down the road and causing Toothy McToothsome to stress bite complete strangers?"

"Interesting, frosh, you know what's super interesting?"

"What?"

"I think vamp girl might have her eye on you. If you dreamed of her last night, that's the first time it's happened outside your dorm room."

"You're right, every time, it's been me sleeping in my room when Betty was away. And then I was gone last night and Betty dreams of her. But then why did I have a dream of her as well, and it was all a different time period too?"

"She was obviously looking for you or is just really connected to you now. Maybe she was dreaming of her past and you fell into the memory? Whatever it is -congratulations, Mina Harker, I think you've attracted the nocturnal attentions of a vampire."

"Gee thanks Laf."

"This is a crazy theory!" said Danny, huffing. "She doesn't get to dream Laura into her memories. I'm not having that."

"Doesn't mean it's wrong, Summer Society."

"So," said Perry, trying to understand, "Is there something in their room which is causing this... odd person to transmit themselves into their dreams?"

"Wait, Betty did say something. She said the girl kept trying to make friends, trying to give her something or take something from her. She couldn't remember, you know Betty. What if that girl gave her some charm that's in my room right now, that's causing the dreams?"

"Ok, I love it when a plan comes together. Let's take Betty back to your room and we'll start searching. And then after that -"

"After that there's the Dean's Town Hall meeting on the Jubilee," reminded Perry primly. "With bells on."

"Okay, town hall, then after that, it's time to start research on mysterious Karnstein Hall so you know, gang, we're going to have to -"

"Go to the library!" said Laf and Laura in one voice, looking at each other.

"Oh no," said Danny, dropping her face in her hands, shaking her head. "What would you geniuses do without me." From under her bed, she pulled out a wooden baseball bat, sighing heavily.

"Okay, let's go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for everyone's comments so far, it's been really great hearing from you all. More clues... drop me a comment if you have any ideas. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A revelation! In which we finally learn the name of the mystery dream girl, and her long lost love, in a cheesy brooding lover across the moors kind of way. And other weird stuff happens.
> 
>    
> This chapter is a bit long and may seem overly filler-y but it's all necessary information. Thanks for sticking with it!

"You know," yelled Danny, as she slogged another flying paperback with her baseball bat, "It would help if you guys would get a move on. This isn't as easy as it looks."

"Maybe we should have tried, you know, googling this stuff first?" said Laura, flipping through an old book frantically and ducking as a paperback flew over her head. "Oh that was a close one."

"I've lost track of the exits! Where are the exits?!" screamed Perry, hugging some large scrolls to her chest and running around aimlessly. "Laf, why do I let you talk me into these things?!"

"I didn't think anything could be worse than listening to Call Me Maybe played on the bells over and over at the town hall meeting today, especially just after the Dean banned us all from leaving campus until the Jubilee is over, but this is definitely getting there," said Laura, ducking another book just in time, only to have another book sneak up on her and whack her on the back of the head. "Ow!"

"Don't be silly Laura, she didn't ban people from leaving campus, no one could do that. People merely have to fill out a form in triplicate a week in advance and submit to a short interrogation session when they return. You know, it's for the good of the university, like a survey or something. To improve traffic conditions," said Perry, flapping her hands to shoo away a curious paperback.

"Yeah, right, because Silas gets so much traffic isolated in this lonely valley in the Styrian mountains in the middle of nowhere."

"Uh... Guys!" warned Danny, as a wall of paperbacks advanced on her menacingly and did whatever the paperback equivalent was of cracking their knuckles. "Whose genius idea was this?"

"Ok, ok, I think I've almost got something but... I'm not sure this is helping, the weird is definitely kicking our asses tonight, let's get out of here," said Laf, as they ran out with their arms over their heads to deflect the onslaught of flying books.

"Oh gosh, the Head Librarian is not going to like the state of this place tomorrow morning," said Perry, picking up up a fallen display stand. LaFontaine hesitated a split second to grab her hand and pull her along.

"Perry, can you not clean while our lives are in danger?! Run!"

* * *

 

Betty's experience with mystery dream girl had thrown up so many feelings Laura still didn't understand into complete commotion. There was always the undercurrent of fear lurking in her mind, especially remembering that wave of evil that had flowed from the mysterious black car. She wasn't going to get over how horribly frightening that felt any time soon. But Laura couldn't deny, especially after spending the night with Danny, that there was something she was missing, something important, and for whatever reason, this ever-so-slightly dangerous dream girl, who had held her tight and had really stood between her and the evil, was the one who could tell her what that was... as long as Laura could keep her from biting her.

"So what do we have so far?" asked Laura, trying to push these overwhelming thoughts of the girl out of her mind for now.

"Well, a lot of information, a ton of vicious paper cuts and not many answers," said LaFontaine.

"The Karnstein name seems to be that of a noble family which died out in the late 17th Century. Countess Mircalla Karnstein was the last of her line for that noble branch anyway. She died at eighteen but I can't find out how or anything about her. Unless we consider a rich, bratty teenage girl a monster I don't see any stories about her doing anything particularly monstrous or ghostly. There are still one or two Karnsteins around the area but it's doubtful whether they're actually from the same family or just named after the place they lived in."

"Oh! And I've found the site of the old Karnstein estate I think!" said Perry, unrolling one of the scrolled maps she'd taken from the library. "Of course, it was a very large estate and a lot of the old maps appear to have been destroyed, so we can't really know exactly where the hall might have been but I think it's generally around... here." Everyone looked on as Perry gestured in a broad circle at the entire map.

"Great. So short of exploring all of Styria, how do we figure out where Karnstein Hall is?"

"Is it even a place? I mean we're just assuming it was the great house of the estate, right? What if it means something else?"

"Hey guys, wait, wait, I think I've found something," said Laura, excitedly, "Wow. I was reading an old book of folklore in the library before the books attacked us so I just grabbed it when we ran out. Look at this I just found." Laura showed them the page, where it was written:

 

_O I forbid you, maidens all,_

_That wear gold in your hair,_

_To come or go by Karnstein Hall,_

_For young Carmilla is there._

 

_There's none that goes by Karnstein Hall_

_But they leave her a gift or wish,_

_Either their rings, or memories all,_

_Or else their true love's kiss._

 

The four of them exchanged worried looks. Something about the plain nursery rhyme lines felt like a hidden threat that came off the page like a sudden flame.

"Well, it says Karnstein Hall all right. And that's very definitely a warning. But who the hell is Carmilla?"

* * *

 

"Laura, I really think I should sleep in your bed tonight," said Danny, blushing a little as she said it, unable to look Laura fully in the eye.

"Um, excuse me?" said Laura, incredulously, her jaw dropping open.

Betty so far had shown no outward signs of illness, but she was completely out of it to say the least. When she wasn't conked out asleep, she'd attempt to murmur things they couldn't understand, even if they could tell she was trying hard to answer their questions. It was like seeing someone struggle desperately to move while being strapped down to a bed. It was alarming enough for Perry to call Student Health Services for advice, but unsurprisingly to anyone except Perry, they were completely unhelpful.

Perry looked up Betty's emergency contact but they were shocked to find out Betty's father was her only family. Even more, her father turned out to be General Spielsdorf, the guy who'd had a brief 15 minutes of fame for coordinating some nighttime swat team field test, armed with wooden sticks no less, that had gone a bit off the rails and ended up surrounding some poor defenceless woman, cowering in the dark. Anyway, not only was he still trying to live this down (the night vision video had been embarrassing, not to mention the internet memes that came out of it), he was out in the field and impossible to reach. This made Laura all the more determined to fight for Betty, to do everything she could. Betty was like her, having only a dad who was far away.

"Well with Betty the way she is, and your new stalkery fang girl, I think it's high time I gave this mystery girl a piece of my mind," said Danny staunchly. "Maybe armed with some choice weapons for Miss Dark and Broody."

The search for some kind of charm so far turned up negative - Betty had plenty of trinkets and knick-knacks here and there but they'd all been at Silas long enough to know there had to be something out of whack about a charm if you looked long and hard enough, and everything of Betty's seemed pretty normal so far. Still, LaFontaine was double checking the weirder items with some kind of geiger counter thing she'd borrowed from the Alchemy Club kids. Danny had been so frustrated with not finding anything useful that Laura was sure that meant trouble for someone once they did find something. She was somehow relieved that they hadn't found it just yet.

"You know, I'm not sure if it works that way Danny," LaFontaine said, thinking it over. "I mean don't get me wrong, I enjoy a death and glory march into a murderous vampire's dreams as much as the next person but both Betty and Laura seemed to have been targeted or marked for attention previously. I mean you could sleep in Laura's bed but all you might be doing is sleeping in Laura's bed. Which -" Laf coughed signifcantly.

"Well we can't do nothing while this - this - stupid unholy creature of the night preys on defenceless young girls!" Danny paced up and down Laura's room, clenching and unclenching her fists. "I mean, look at Betty now. And if she was able to bite Laura in real life _through_ her dream, who knows what else she could do?!"

"She could eat her!" said Perry, wide-eyed. "I mean, that is if vampires actually existed... she might just be a serial killer. Cannibal. Something normal like that."

"Really, this is where you're going with this, Perr? A serial killer who hangs out in people's dreamscapes looking for prey instead of a _vampire_ who does exactly the same thing? What definition of normal are we working with here?"

"Guys, can we not talk about me and Betty as though we're not here? No one is sleeping in my bed except me."

"Well I'll stay up with you," offered Danny defiantly. Laura sighed. LaFontaine and Perry had taken one look at them and then at each other, then silently filed out the door.

"Danny," said Laura, trying to be as fair and understanding as she could, "You're sweet, you're always so sweet to me and I appreciate what you're trying to do. But I don't need you to wrap me in cotton wool so I don't break. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself. I'm not going to stay awake out of fear anymore. It's no use running away. I'm going to sleep and I'm going to find this girl and get some answers."

"Laura, no, it's not safe. You don't know what you're doing. How are you going to wake up if you're in danger? Should I call you every hour?"

"Nothing's safe anymore Danny, don't you understand? How long can we hide? If it's not safe for me, it's not safe for you either. Just _please_ stop being a knight rescuing damsels in distress and just be my friend, who trusts me and listens to what I have to say. I like you Danny, I really do, but I can't live behind bars to stay safe. No one can. There's a whole world out there and I want to know it, I want to know everything about it. I won't stop just because someone out there wants to hurt me." Laura paused sadly. "I guess what I just said to you I really want to say to my dad."

Danny sighed, running her fingers through her hair in frustration.

"You're really infuriating," she looked down at Laura, rubbing her temple. She looked despondent and shrugged uselessly. "What if I don't know how to be anything else but a knight?" Laura put her hand on Danny's arm gently.

"Maybe you're just going to have to wing it like the rest of us are," Laura smiled at her, "but after tonight, I'll definitely call you if I ever need to do battle with a library again."

* * *

 

When night came around, Laura was now desperate to fall asleep. She had to push Danny bodily out the door and had fairly jumped into bed with anticipation, clutching the blankets to her and scrunching her eyes shut, her heart beating so fast and so loud she could hear it in her ears. She couldn't help going around in circles in her mind, thinking of what she would say and what she would do. Sleep couldn't come quick enough.

Laura had a restful sleep and woke the next day to the morning bells.

One night, two nights passed where Laura slept more soundly than she ever had before. Every night, it was the same, nothing happened. It was so totally frustrating. Now that she was ready to face her, it seemed dream girl didn't want to see her after all. Laura tried not to feel so disappointed inside. This playing hard to get routine was wearing her down and it was occurring to her that she was getting a little too obsessive about seeing some stranger who'd bitten her. Who'd also given her the best kiss she'd ever dreamed of, but that was by the by. It was just for answers, Laura told herself. She needed answers. Betty needed answers.

_"If you want me, come and find me."_ That's what the girl had said, in her low teasing growl. Was it supposed to be some kind of mocking challenge, or an actual invitation?

Who was she, and why had she warned Betty of Karnstein Hall? What had her message meant, she wished things had been different? Was she maybe a victim of this Carmilla monster herself, who maybe was the creepy lady in the black car with the tinted windows? Perhaps she was in thrall to her and trying her best to warn others? Laura just didn't know anymore. She needed to see the girl, to talk to her. Just to talk.

Five nights later and Laura had given up in despair. Whether awake, whether asleep, the dream girl was nowhere to be found. Laura had tried sleeping at all hours of the day, but still nothing. Laf's tests on the potential charms had come back inconclusive. It was like she'd been a figment of her imagination after all, an imaginary girl who she just couldn't stop thinking about.

Laura could no longer deny that in some weird way she was longing for her. 

On the seventh night, without expecting anything different from the past week, having fallen asleep over her lit paper, Laura found herself waking up in a place that was strangely familiar, yet unfamiliar.

The air seemed golden all around her, a sepia glow, with a blue sky dotted around with fluffy white clouds.

She stood by a road, perhaps it was the same road, or perhaps not. Nothing seemed exactly the same. A stand of trees leading to the dark shadows of a forest was on one side of her, and on the other a hedgerow overgrown with roses bordered the gentle rolling fields that rose up a hill in the distance. And everywhere, there was a dreadful silence. No birds sang. No wind rustled the leaves. Every sound was magnified ten times over. It felt a little claustrophobic.

It was like being in some old painting of pastoral life, somehow unreal, as though she was standing outside herself, observing her own actions in the dream. Looking down at herself, she saw she was dressed in a fine gown, something 19th century-ish, but she wasn't sure exactly what period it was. It was just as constricting as the last gown, perhaps more so as she felt the corset under her ruffles. She walked as though she was trying out the fine leather boots on her feet for the first time, clumping across the road, the sound of her heels echoing, turning, attempting to swirl in her skirts. Oh this was awful, this was not something you wanted to wear if you ever wanted to flee the scene quickly. Laura was finding it hard to breathe in the corset.

She lifted up her skirts the best she could and walked to the other side of the road. The roses there grew in profusion, but Laura's eye was particularly attracted by one budding white rose that grew just out of reach, one of the few white roses in amongst the pink. For some reason, she had to have it, it was calling out to her. She jumped awkwardly for it. Darn. Ow! She missed. And again! This time she'd been able to hold onto it, but she had nothing to cut it with. She needed this rose, she had to have it. Laura gritted her teeth and pulled.

A rush of hooves sounded out behind her, loud and ominous in the general silence, and as she turned, she saw _her_. Dressed in a black riding habit with flowing skirts, the dream girl was seated on a coal black steed and looking both gorgeous and furious. The horse reared, snorting from its nostrils, as rider and horse clattered dangerously close to Laura, who was still standing there awkwardly holding onto a rose that was far above her reach.

"How dare you," said the girl in a low angry voice, handling the powerful stallion expertly as though they were one creature, without fear. Laura was stunned by how attractive this was, the picture of skill and beauty in one. Her jaw dropped a little. 

"I, uh... hey?" said Laura lamely. She smiled nervously. The dream girl's brow wrinkled in brief confusion.

"Who gave you leave to be here? Do you know what land this is? You dare to pick a rose, it seems you were born foolish, my sweet," said the girl, haughtily, staring at Laura as if trying to remember something. "Perhaps you need saving from your own idiocy and that I would be glad to provide."

She tapped her riding crop against her boot lightly, her dark eyes flashing, and at first Laura's eyes widened in fear at the menacing gesture. Then she got peeved. Who did this girl think she was, prancing around on a silly horse as if she owned the place, threatening people like some kind of brooding Heathcliff. After waiting a week to see her, this was really not what she expected. Laura was frustrated to say the least and stared defiantly up at her. The girl's profile was handsome and haughty, with fine lines drawn from her nose to her jawline and slender neck. Long, dark locks curled around her pale skin. In the late afternoon light, she was even more impossibly beautiful than Laura remembered. It was just a pity she was such a bitch, as Betty would have said.

"My father owns these lands," retorted Laura, to her own surprise, "and when I am of age and heaven forbid my dear papa is gone, these lands shall be mine. So I'll thank you not to get on your high horse... er... again. Metaphorically speaking that is."

Laura swayed a little but obstinately refused to let go of the rose. She pulled a little, trying to be cool and nonchalant, but the rose refused to be picked.

The girl arched her fine eyebrow and seemed to suppress a smile. She cleared her throat.

"Indeed, sweetling," she said shortly, "but it may be that the earth has long known a far greater owner than your _dear papa_."

"Oh, and that's you I suppose?" mocked Laura, "with your tender years - no doubt scarely a score - to his fifty? You cannot be more than eighteen, like me."

Laura, observing herself speak in utter surprise, was egging her dream self on. _You go girl!_ She didn't know who she was supposed to be or where she came from but she sounded so feisty and was not about to take any nonsense from this obnoxious girl like some demure Victorian young lady.

"You think I'm like you? Dear, sweet, naive girl," laughed the dream girl. It was hard to tell whether there was malice in her tone or not.

She trotted her horse closer and closer, but furious, Laura refused to back down. The girl looked impressed in spite of herself.

"I see you hold on tight to the things you desire. You are a brave one, or very foolish indeed."

Laura squared her shoulders, not letting go.

To her surprise, the girl laughed, and taking off her riding glove, she bent down and wrapped her soft, cool fingers around Laura's, brushing against her skin slowly. She couldn't help but feel a frisson of excitement at the light touch. The dream girl's eyes sought out Laura no matter where she looked, until they caught.

"Let your fingers go, my darling," whispered the mysterious girl finally, smiling that secret smile and staring intently all the while.

Laura, disconcerted by the shining dark eyes in front of her, considered things for a while and slowly released her fingers and they slipped away out of the girl's hand. Laura felt the lack of touch immediately and blushed without being able to help it.

To her surprise, the girl easily plucked the rose, from the height of the horse, but gasped as she did so. In one swift motion, she had dismounted, and stood close to Laura, almost too close.

"A hard won prize indeed," said the girl quietly, and offered her the rose. But the white had been marred by a drop of blood on it, from where the girl must have pricked her finger.

"Thank you," said Laura softly in surprise. The girl nodded slightly, and shrugged as though she couldn't believe it herself. The gaze between them never broke.

"Who are you?" Laura asked after a while, hiding her nose in the white rose and looking up secretly at the girl.

The girl laughed shortly and looked away into the distance. There was a long pause.

"They call me Carmilla," she said, sighing for some reason. _Carmilla?! Was this Carmilla?_ "And what shall I call you, my sweetling?"

Every instinct was blaring out warning alarms at maximum volume, telling Laura to run, to hide herself. She couldn't deny the magnetic pull the girl had for her, the sparks that were flying every which way between them, but that made the fear of her just as great. Somehow the girl was already holding Laura's hand, absentmindedly stroking her fingers with the pad of her thumb. Laura felt so confused, so conflicted. The corset was making her breathing go all haywire, and this girl, standing so close, her lips parted, waiting for her to speak, was really not helping.

But this was the Carmilla of the rhyme, the rhyme that warned maidens never to come here. The dark-haired, mysterious girl who had kissed her so heartbreakingly all those dreams ago, and not the creepy lady in the car of Betty's nightmares, was Carmilla, the possible monster of Karnstein Hall.

"Sweetling?" repeated the girl, pressing a little closer, her face drawing near enough for - well, for Laura to tremble. Laura closed her eyes briefly.

"Uh, you can call me... you can call me L," said Laura, desperately trying to think of a way out.

"Elle," murmured Carmilla in a low, thoughtful voice. "It's a beautiful name." She kissed Laura's hand gently, gazing up at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possibly not my best writing work, sorry! Thanks as always for reading and commenting. Tell your friends about this story if you like. I love feedback...
> 
> For those who know the rhyme I slightly altered, you will now know the fairytale on which this is based. But don't let that fool you! Forgive the cheese but I was being true to the tale.
> 
> By the way, in the original tale, maidens lose way more than just a kiss, who knows how that may play out in this story.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura gets to know her brooding lover racing across the moors/forest a bit better.

It was difficult for Laura to tell how much time had actually passed since Carmilla had kissed her hand. They stared at each other and kept staring, as if they'd never seen each other before, as if they'd always been searching for each other.

Carmilla the unknown, the girl who kissed her in a dream, a vampire who had attacked her, a stranger who had held her safe against the coming of some unnameable evil. Carmilla, the sometime monster of Karnstein Hall, who, most puzzlingly, had warned them all, through Betty, against herself. Who was Carmilla? Maybe she was someone good who could not be trusted, someone bad who perhaps could be loved.

What she was was utterly confusing for Laura. A melancholy paradox. Who was still standing closer to her than was socially acceptable and still holding her hand and making her feel all kinds of -

Laura pulled her hand away.

"Uh, it's nice to meet you. Carmilla."

"Enchantée, the pleasure is all mine," said Carmilla, with a shy little smile.

It changed her whole outlook. It was crazy how at one moment she could be so obnoxious and haughty and at the next... almost bearable, decided Laura. Her expressions changed so frequently, she was hard to read.

It happened again in that moment - Carmilla's ears suddenly pricked up at the sound of a rumble on the road, somewhere in the distance, and her expression hardened.

"The pleasure is all mine," she repeated, "But it may be another's before long. It isn't safe for young ladies to stray out here, I give you fair warning. You must leave. Now!"

"But you're a young lady yourself," Laura retorted. This girl had an overly commanding air. She really hoped Carmilla wasn't going to be another protector type she'd have to deal with. Danny was lovely, but one Danny was quite enough.

But it appeared Carmilla was planning on abandoning her to danger and leaving her to her own devices.

"I'm different, sweetheart," smirked Carmilla, getting back on her horse quickly with hardly any effort, though it was the largest and meanest looking horse Laura had ever seen, and he gave her a baleful glance before ignoring her pointedly. Carmilla's horse pranced in place, seeming impatient to be off. Carmilla didn't seem to be in the mood to stay either.

"I might be different too," said Laura, looking intently up at Carmilla, who looked back down, consideringly, and then looked behind them. She sighed heavily and looked back down at Laura.

"Maybe you are, at that. Well said, give me your hand," said Carmilla abruptly. "I must be a complete fool." Laura put her hand out sadly, expecting Carmilla to shake it goodbye, but instead she grabbed her firmly up to the elbow and before she knew it, Laura was seated on the horse in front of her, her legs dangling to one side.

Laura squeaked in surprise as Carmilla wrapped an arm around her middle, as she sat side-saddle against her, and kicked the stallion into a canter. The wind rushed through her hair and Laura found time to gasp and feel exhilarated and alive, especially with Carmilla's slender body propping her up from behind, both of them fitting in place, before fear of what was behind them settled in the pit of her stomach. What was happening now? Something that Carmilla was afraid of, this girl who seemed so fearless, had to be much worse than anything Laura could imagine.

"Stay low, little honeycake, this may be a wild ride," said Carmilla grimly, as the rumble of wheels could be heard from behind them.

"Don't look behind you, you little fool," said Carmilla through her teeth, as Laura tried peering behind them. Carmilla's arm pushed her back to the front, but by that time Laura had glimpsed the black coach that was rapidly gaining ground, though it seemed to be moving at a slow and leisurely pace. Two horsemen in black rode before the coach and four, and two rode behind them. The entire equipage had that same ominous evil feeling that flowed outward from whatever was within that she remembered from the black car. Laura felt sick to her stomach.

"Stay low, little one," said Carmilla again, holding onto her tightly. Laura was getting a little annoyed at all these orders.

"Why should I? Who are you calling little?" said Laura indignantly.

"Just do as I say!" ordered Carmilla crossly, "Before I throw you off this horse. Truly, princess, you are a most annoying child. Explanations can wait. Right now, it would behoove us to avoid certain death."

That seemed reasonable. Laura shut up. Oh, what was it behind them, gaining at every second? She huddled against Carmilla's body as Carmilla gripped her tightly. Too tightly, for Carmilla's hand on her wrist was so tight it was cutting off the blood flow. Clutched so tightly to her, she could hear Carmilla's heart rate go up alarmingly. Carmilla had her head down and seemed to be concentrating on racing across country like a bat out of hell. They turned into the forest and low branches threatened to whip them before Carmilla and her horse veered away expertly at the last moment.

"Carmilla, you're hurting me," said Laura. The bumping of the horse galloping away did nothing to help.

"Mea culpa," said Carmilla, distractedly. "Just merge into the movement of the horse, lean into me, instead of flopping like a sack of potatoes, and it will give you less pain, plum pudding o' mine."

"Plum p-! I'm not sure I quite like your names for me," said Laura primly, "After all, we've just met, it does seem like an awful liberty. Can you not just call me by my name?" Laura could feel Carmilla shaking her head in disbelief, but it served to get her mind off whatever dangers were approaching.

"I'm not sure I quite like the bad decisions I've made since I met you, dearest," retorted Carmilla, "They are not going to like what I just did. They will know what has gone missing. And I must admit the case is against me with my fleeing from the scene. With an unknown maiden no less. Your hope is that they have not seen you. That they cannot detect you."

"Who are 'They'? What are you talking about?"

"Trust my luck to come across a lovely creature who is fond of asking the most inane questions at the point of escape. Can this not wait, sweetheart?"

"You're kind of obnoxious," huffed Laura.

"And you are an inquisitive little fool," said Carmilla, as her body tensed and the horse suddenly jumped across a ravine. Laura screamed at being unexpectedly airborne and Carmilla's hand clapped over her mouth.

"Who likes to scream during intense moments. We can't have that just now my darling," she said, her jaw clenched, "save that for later."

With a delicate hand clapped her mouth and her body trapped by a slim but incredibly strong arm, Laura wasn't sure if she should feel like she was being kidnapped or violently courted. Perhaps this was what a damsel in distress felt like. Well Laura Hollis was no damsel in distress and this girl had better know that sooner than later.

"Mmf," said Laura, struggling a little. "Mmfff!"

"Those sounds you make are music to my ears, dearest one," said Carmilla, breathing in her ear. Laura shivered as Carmilla's lips bumped lightly against her ear.

Laura, ignoring any internal feelings of melting into a dizzying mess, frowned and huffed, glaring. Carmilla laughed lightly in her ears. Laura had an idea and pursing her lips, kissed Carmilla's hand. Though Carmilla's hand twitched, and her eyes looked amused, nothing more happened. They rode on.

Laura stuck out a tentative tongue and slowly licked Carmilla's palm, clamped to her mouth.

"Oh," breathed Carmilla, "You seem intent on misbehaving, princess, but it won't -"

Laura bit Carmilla's hand.

"Yow!" yelped Carmilla at the sudden nip, removing her hand. "You little wildcat!"

"Don't treat me like a -" Laura burst out.

"Quiet!" growled Carmilla.

They were riding through a trail in the forest alongside the road. Nothing could be heard in the forest but the sound of the hooves galloping onwards. Then they heard it, the unhurried rumble of a coach that seemed to be so close, and with it, that sickening feeling of evil that pushed against them like magnetic poles repelling. No matter where they turned, some sense of the black coach followed them. And it was getting closer. Carmilla's shoulders drooped a bit in resignation.

"Damn me," she said through gritted teeth.

"Can't we turn into the fields?" whispered Laura.

"We'd be an open target there, there are eyes watching me everywhere. The only safe place to hide is the forest." Carmilla hesitated, then suddenly threw a dead branch that had tangled into her horse's mane, vehemently. "I should not have taken you with me, the danger is greater when you are with me. When anyone is with me."

"What do you mean? Who are these people following you?"

Carmilla gave no answer but took a deep breath. She jolted her horse into a sudden and rapid burst of speed, making a sharp turn along a trail that was so narrow Laura was afraid the trees would cause an unhappy end to them after all.

Laura clutched Carmilla's arm in panic as all of a sudden the horse made a giant, impossible leap, sailing through the air directly at what seemed to be a thickly tangled wall of thorns and vines. They landed with a thud and reached a small clearing, far from the road, with the shrubs and underbrush growing matted all around them, parasitic vines choking the trees up to their canopies and forming a thorny wall. Here the silence was greater than it had been, but in the distance they could still hear the faint creaking of the coach wheels, ever present.

"We can go no further than this, sweetness."

Carmilla stilled her horse with a gentle call. The stallion breathed heavily, and Laura could feel him trembling under them. Carmilla soothed him with murmured words, reaching past Laura, patting him down with her hand, until after a while, he also settled into silence. Laura took the opportunity to stare at Carmilla as she nearly lay across her lap, calming her horse down. The dark locks had fallen around her face and only the tip of her noble nose was visible, then her jaw and her pale, delicate skin. She rose, lifting her head, glancing at Laura and Laura looked away guiltily. Carmilla frowned a little.

"What is this place? Why have you taken me here?" asked Laura. "Who are those people behind us?"

"There is much I cannot say, I am bound by laws that cannot be gainsaid." Carmilla hesitated. "One might say I am cursed, and that is not entirely metaphorically speaking, as you would say." She looked at Laura carefully. "Though I may seem an ordinary young lady to you, suffice it to say I am different. You cannot understand, thank god for that. This is not a place you belong in." She looked at Laura with sadness.

Laura opened her mouth to speak, to reassure her... of something, but the moment passed.

Carmilla had shifted and turned, peering through the forest. Laura could see nothing through the shadows. Already, the late afternoon light was fading. Dusk was fast approaching, and in the still forest, there was a chill in the air that spoke of a stale autumn, musty and already decaying. It was not hard to believe that evil lurked here, all around them. It was very different from the golden wheatfields and rolling hills she'd seen before.

Laura shivered, closing her eyes, and felt Carmilla lean closer, her body close, her face even closer. Everything was tense, like a cat about to pounce. They both heard it at the same time.

"Hush, little dove," said Carmilla in a voice so low Laura could hardly hear it. "Not a sound."

The creaky wheels crept closer, slow and deliberate, louder and louder until... it stopped. They heard a laugh then, a woman's laugh, like silvery bells from some dreamy fairyland, that should have seemed beautiful and captivating, but somehow made Laura's skin crawl. Horses snorting and hooves trotting around the road told them that a search was underway.

They held their breaths, trying to listen to every sound they could catch, both of them tense with the fear of being found. Around the clearing there now came the loud rustle, incessant rustle of leaves, of horses stamping at the underbrush. It sounded terrifically loud, and terribly frightening. Laura's heart beat fit to burst and she cringed at every noise that rustled around them. Carmilla had her finger up to Laura's lips in warning, her face close. It seemed they stayed there, staring at each other for a long time, neither of them remembering to breathe.

In another moment, finally, the rustling noises stopped, the horses moved on, back to the road. The sound of the creaky wheels commenced again, and Carmilla did not move until the sound had completely died away.

Laura breathed out slowly, around Carmilla's fingertip. Her gaze dropped to Carmilla's lips. Carmilla seemed to have just realised that her finger was still there, and in moving it away slowly, she lightly parted Laura's lips. Laura gave a shaky, shuddering breath, which she hoped could be explained by the scare they had just gone through. It turned into a nervous laugh, which was stilled as Carmilla touched her fingers gently to her face.

They were close. Very close. Carmilla was staring hard at her, at her lips, and Laura was starting to feel faint. Her eyelids fluttered shut...

She felt a shift then, opening her eyes to see Carmilla looking despondently away, though nothing could be seen in the encroaching dark.

"What was that?" ask Laura in a disgruntled voice.

"It's time for you to go home," said Carmilla curtly, ignoring her question. "Youll have to find your own way from here, I can go no further."

"You haven't answered my questions," Laura pointed out petulantly,

"And I don't have to," said Carmilla coolly.

"Ugh! You're so aggravating!" fumed Laura. "You're the most awful person I've ever met."

"You catch on quickly, little dove."

"And stop calling me those names!"

"From here, you can reach the road if you follow north and turn right at the old stone wall." Carmilla ignored her and patiently directed her, pointing in the dark, seemingly unaware that her other hand was still holding Laura steady on the horse. The horse snorted derisively and pawed at the ground.

"I can't see a thing, how do you expect me to find my way home after you've just kidnapped me and taken me to the middle of nowhere?!"

"Well, an independent young lady like you shouldn't have any trouble," smirked Carmilla. "I thought you said you were different?"

"I'm sure I could find my way very well in the dark without your aid," said Laura crossly, "but you could be a gentlewoman and take me home, since you brought me here and won't answer any of my perfectly reasonable questions."

"I cannot leave here," said Carmilla, her jaw clenching. "Do you not understand? Or must I spell it out for you in nursery letters such as they make for children?"

"Explain it to me then," said Laura softly. But Carmilla lowered her head and would not respond. Laura sighed. "Well at least let me stay with you this night. I can find my own way back in the morning light. After the scare we just had, which you refuse to explain to me, that is the least you can do."

Carmilla laughed without joy. "My home is not fit for one such as you, little dear."

"Or do you mean I am not fit for it?" Laura challenged. "If you are too noble and far above me I can stay in your stables if need be, I just need a safe place until morning."

"It's not that," said Carmilla, hesitating. "I just -"

"Tell me," said Laura gently.

Carmilla seemed to set her shoulders back and made a decision. She clucked gently at her horse, who started walking a circle around the clearing before speeding up.

"Hup!" called Carmilla, and they sailed over the underbrush a second time, only this time in the dimming light. Laura clung to Carmilla - as exhilarating as it was, it was never not going to be scary, being airborne on this black charger.

But they cleared it, and the horse made its way slowly along a crooked path that led deeper into the forest.

At the river, there was a bridge which they passed over. They rode along silently, passing by walls that once seemed high and noble, and now had crumbled into rubble. There were signs of scorched earth, the general feeling of decay and that true evil had once lived there, perhaps was still asleep here, infesting the ground with its presence. The once lovely grounds had been despoiled by pits in the lawns and the smell of stale smoke still lingered on what remained of the timber frames of outbuildings.

As they rode up the gentle slope, an enormous castle rose up against the sky. Laura could see that it, too, had crumbled into ruins. Some towers were still standing, but most of it had fallen into decay - even more, it seemed some of it had been deliberately destroyed. Grass and weeds grew over everything. Rubbish and detritus lay about.

Laura shivered again at the imposing, fearsome structures around her, that spoke of death only. Carmilla looked at her without saying anything, or showing any emotion.

Finally, they reached the end of that solitary path and passed an enormous gate which still stood tall to forbid unhappy visitors from entering. Some awful sense of despair and unhappiness had settled on the whole place. All that could be heard was the regular clopping of hooves and the jingle of the buckles on the reins.

Laura looked silently at Carmilla, her eyes wide.

"So you see," said Carmilla bitterly, "this is my home now. " She laughed, an empty and futile sound that rang out in the silent night.

"Welcome to Karnstein Hall."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must admit I enjoyed writing this gothic chapter with an extra side of cheese. It is a bit different from the other chapters so hopefully it doesn't distract too much.
> 
> Let me know what you think. :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back at Silas University, the gang uncovers even more disturbing news.
> 
> Meanwhile, Carmilla and Laura have a tea party (you see how ridiculous this story is). ;)

Laura woke up to the sound of the bells ringing.

"No, no, no," she murmured sleepily. "M'not ready. Stay."

She tried to get back to sleep but it was no use. The bells were obliging by being a lot quieter than usual at least. No good. She'd have to get herself up now what with Betty so strangely sick and unable to lob the usual pillow. She missed Betty so much. And oh god, did she even finish her lit paper? This semester was kicking her behind in more ways than one.

She lay there, awake, but unwilling to open her eyes and see the same dorm room ceiling with the brown water damage stain in the corner. On the other side would be Betty, still asleep no doubt. They had to figure out what to do about Betty. Heck, she had to figure out what to do about herself. The things she was feeling were unreal... probably literally.

If she kept her eyes closed, she could imagine she was back with Carmilla, strange, exciting, annoying Carmilla. Intoxicating in a way that was just all kinds of bad. She could feel her heart speeding up just thinking about it. God, she had to figure out what to do about Carmilla too. Figure out what it all meant. There were so many questions they didn't have the answers to when it came to that girl. And Carmilla didn't seem the cooperative type.

She was definitely bad news. Definitely. But there was something about her which was so magnetic and intriguing Laura couldn't get her out of her mind.

Damn those bells. Her head ached, her body was so sore. At least they weren't playing some solemn arrangement of a ridiculously cheesy pop song this morning.

Laura opened her eyes finally, blinking in the morning light. The first thing that struck her was that someone had removed the ceiling. The second, was that something was on fire.

She sat bolt upright, confused. A feeling of pure relief and a shrinking despair overwhelmed her all at once. There, lying on a threadbare rug on the cold stone floor, was Carmilla, her dark hair in disarray framing her pale, beautiful face. She looked so young and so helpless while asleep. Laura was sitting up in a four poster bed, all alone. It was cold. The fire in the fireplace had just gone out, and the logs were smouldering. A wispy finger of smoke had wafted its way over to her.

She hadn't left the dream. The bells were ringing, and she was still there. Why hadn't she woken up yet? Why were the bells still ringing, somewhere on the Silas campus, when she was dreaming she was awake here in this other place?

But the next thought that struck her left her cold. Was she stuck here for good? Had she become desensitized to the sound that had always brought her home before?

Carmilla shifted in her sleep, murmuring something unintelligible. Suddenly, Laura was thinking less of her charms, of the magnetic attraction between them, and more of the palpable sense of evil which had hit her like a sledgehammer to the face the day before.

At the time, knowing she was in a dream, though the whole thing had been so frightening, it was like a nightmare, it hadn't seemed quite so real, quite so serious as it could be. As soon as the bells rang, she knew she had a way out. But now - it was not just about these strange creepy people in the black coach who had some bizarre connection to Carmilla. It was Carmilla herself. The question she always came back to. Was she evil? Did she intend to hurt her and was all this intermittent... _bearableness_ all a trick to get her blood? It had happened once before. Laura just didn't know.

What if there was no escape from this? Laura shuddered to think about it. Perhaps Danny had been right, she had been reckless, going in without considering a backup plan. At least she hadn't given Carmilla her real name. That was one thing she'd done right. Who knew what evil magicks could be perpetrated on a name, she'd learnt some caution going to Silas at least.

"Elle," said Carmilla gently, "Good morning to you."

She smiled wanly, as though she wasn't sure of the reception she'd get. Laura would never cease to be surprised, wondering which side Carmilla would show her next.

"Oh, er, hey!" said Laura, too brightly. "Good morning to you!"

Carmilla winced at the loudness and Laura mouthed a sorry. Carmilla shook her head ruefully.

"Between your regrettable early morning enthusiasm and those blasted bells, I hardly know how my head stays together in one piece, truly, my suet pudding."

"I'm so sorry you had to sleep on the fl - wait. You can hear those bells?"

Carmilla looked at her as if she'd grown two heads with nary a brain cell to rattle between them.

"Is that so surprising? Do you think me a lackwit who has forgotten how to use her ears? Sleeping on the floor by no means endangers one's hearing, that is but an old wives' tale," she said dryly.

"No, no! Well, I mean, what are those bells?" asked Laura, flustered.

"I had forgotten perhaps your family had but recently moved to the area," said Carmilla, looking at her curiously. "Those faraway bells you hear are from the bell tower at Silas Field, one of the few remaining structures left to us here."

"Us?"

"You see, when I d- that is, my family fell on hard times but once we owned many of the lands around here, not just the Hall but also the nearby town that bore our name. I wasn't lying to you, before about being the older owner of these lands. Of course, that is all gone and destroyed now. But it is a long tale for the telling and perhaps too early of a morning for that. I regret I have little to offer you but hot chocolate, let me -"

"And the bells? Why do they play if there is no town left to listen?" Laura persisted.

"Ah," said Carmilla, her face filling with a sudden hatred. "They are practicing for the Jubilee."

* * *

 

In the old quad, Danny, Laf and Perry spotted each other walking along the various paths that headed towards Summer Society House, the dorms and the library.

They ran towards each other, meeting in the middle, breathless and babbling over the top of each other.

"I have bad news!" They all told each other at once, before their faces fell.

"You first."

"No sorry, go ahead."

"I'll go," said Danny. "In a nutshell: two more girls have fallen into this sleep-waking-tired coma thing, like Betty."

"I just checked on Laura and she's been asleep for at least 18 hours and counting and won't wake up. I've tried shaking her, tickling her with my pinkie, everything!" said Perry, "I'm really worried, it's not healthy for someone to sleep that much."

In silent agreement, they all turned the same direction and headed towards the dorms.

LaFontaine puffed out her news in between breaths as they rushed towards the dorms.

"Mine's less urgent, but still pretty bad - I've found out a bit more about the Karnsteins with the help of a new friend - well that is, Perry was right about the Karnstein estate being large - it was massive and even had a town named after it. But after Mircalla died, for some reason the entire town and most of the estate was torched, razed to the ground, the works. For hundreds of years no one ventured near the place. Maps were destroyed, many references to it were utterly destroyed. Question is, why?"

"New friend -?" Perry started to ask, but they had arrived at the dorms and rushed in.

At the entrance to Laura's room, they found an overgrown specimen of a Zeta Omega Mu brother, sans trident and salted herring, pacing the corridor.

"Hey, hotties," he said genially, "does little nerd hottie live here?"

Danny glared at him and stood at the door, her arms folded, standing guard.

"You know, what's her name, the nerdy hottie who's in my... lit class." His voice trailed off a bit as he noticed Danny's baleful looks. He nervously looked between them all.

"Will you please stop saying hottie?" said Perry, upset and flapping her hands to shoo him out of the way.

"Don't you have some kind of stupid hazing ritual to screw up so your stupid ass misogynistic frat hovel can be closed down once and for all?" asked Danny tersely.

"Whoa, psycho summer - sexy society, why all the negativity? Is this because we beat you guys during the -"

"Because people like you cause it so it's only right that you should get it back."

"Okay psycho society, I don't know what stowed away in your pants this morning but you're kinda being a dick."

"Takes one to know -" started Danny.

"Okay, the both of you. Not. Helping. We have things, urgent things that we need to be worrying about. First, who are you, and what do you want?" demanded Perry.

Everyone was stunned at her directness. Perry was usually so moderate in her tones, the weird was clearly getting to her.

"Uhh," mumbled Danny.

"Er... err..." stumbled the zeta brother.

"Speak up!"

"I'm Kirsch. Kirsch! Lauren! Laurel? Laura! I just want to talk to her," blurted Kirsch. "Don't hurt me angry floor don hottie!"

"Why do you need to talk to Laura?" asked Perry.

"Well, it's kind of a private mat-"

"Tell me now or I will give you a thousand papercuts with this Silas Super Fun Guide for Floor Dons and then spray you with lye."

"Okay, okay it's about my girlfriend! Sarah-Jane. We were talking to nerd hottie - Laura - in class the other day and she mentioned her roommate had this sleep condition thingy. Because you see Sarah-Jane has been feeling super sleepy lately, and not even up to any... well a dude needs to get in touch with his, like, feminine side sometimes, you know?"

"Oh, god, ewww. I don't even want to know what -"

"So I was like, worried about her and hoping Laura could tell us more. She's the smartest person I know! She's the only nerd I know." Kirsch hesitated. "Thing is, I went to see her - SJ - and... and... she can't get up. I mean she can't do anything, she can't even talk properly. I'm kinda worried. You know I asked my bros but they - well they didn't have anything helpful to say," he finished, a little angrily. "They just laughed." He gulped down some unnameable feeling and turned his face away.

"So that's number three," said Danny quietly, in the silence that followed. "Sarah-Jane, Betty, Natalie the one I found out about this morning and... and... Elsie, my - a sister from Summer Society."

"What is going on here?" wondered Perry, her brow furrowing. "Could they all have eaten something bad in the dining hall, maybe something containing eyeballs? I don't like this, this is not how it's supposed to - this is not acceptable!"

"And then there's Laura," added LaFontaine.

"Oh my god, Laura!" They entered the dorm room, Kirsch hovering in the back looking in curiously. Laura was still out for the count, splayed out at her desk, drooling on what appeared to be her lit paper. To the side Betty was asleep, but tossing and turning weakly, murmuring something they couldn't understand.

"She's been like that, frozen in that same position since last night," whispered Perry.

"That looks hella uncomfortable," whispered LaFontaine. "Frosh is going to have back problems in later life."

"I just hope that dream bitch hasn't done anything to her like she has to all the rest of these girls," Danny said in a piercing whisper.

"Hotties," whispered Kirsch, leaning over them, joining in the scrum, "why are we whispering?"

Danny pushed him away impatiently.

"Let's move Laura to her bed at least," said Danny in her normal tone of voice.

"Do you think that's wise?" said Perry, wringing her hands anxiously. "They say not to move people who've been involved in accidents."

"Oh this was no accident Perr, I think she meant to drool on that lit paper."

"LaFontaine! I mean, she may be in a delicate state internally, should we really move her?"

"Laf, help me out here," said Danny. But in the end it was Kirsch who took Laura's ankles and Danny who carried her arms and they placed her gently on her bed, looking at her in consternation. They looked from her to Betty, who was still murmuring.

"No!" Betty yelled suddenly. They all jumped, and Perry barely stifled a scream.

"Betty, Betty, are you okay?" asked Danny, running to her.

"No, don't make me go in there," murmured Betty. "Bells, bells, bells, bells, bells."

"There aren't any bells playing this morning, thank god they're taking a break. Betty, it's just a dream, you're okay."

"Who do you see, is it that evil girl in black in your dreams? Did she give you something? Some charm?"

Betty giggled inanely.

"Noooo, silly, she was already charming! Likes cupcake. Was the other one met on the road. Creepy lady. She gave it to me. Dad shouldn't send me here alone for frosh... so tired don't member. Laura don't go in there. No!"

They looked at each other.

"Betty, Betty!" said Danny, quickly, "Can you tell us... oh god." Betty had fallen asleep again, snoring slightly.

"Ask her if she knows what happened to Sarah-Jane," said Kirsch belatedly, poking his head between their shoulders.

"Seriously?!" said Danny in disgust.

"Um, yeah, like, I wanna know..." he backed off, as Danny turned the full force of her glare on him.

"Guys, uh, it kinda sounds like Betty's saying she met this creepy woman when she first got here, for frosh week? So maybe not in a dream?"

"Who the hell knows, can we make any sense of this at all?" said Danny tiredly, rubbing her temple in frustration. "I just think that murderous vamp is behind this all. If she can reach people through their dreams and do things to them, she might be alive in real life, right?"

"Maybe she's even in the area, on campus, if she's able to project her thoughts. Unless she has super powerful ESP or something," mused LaFontaine.

"And if she's alive, charm or dream or no dream, I'm going to find her, and I'm going to make her pay."

* * *

 

Carmilla placed a delicate china cup in front of Laura and was pouring hot chocolate into it from a silver chocolate pot. Laura's eyes were drawn to her pale, slender fingers, before she raised them to meet Carmilla's darkening eyes looking back at her.

"This is really all you eat or drink? How are you still alive?" said Laura, clearing her throat. A rosy tinge was barely detectable on her cheeks. Her fingers played nervously with the small glass vase in which she'd placed the hard-won rose that Carmilla had given her. Surprisingly, it had not suffered for having been squashed during the hell-for-leather horse ride yesterday and still seemed as fresh and beautiful as if it had never been plucked.

"Oh, well, I eat other... things, here and there," said Carmilla, suddenly looking anywhere else but Laura's face.

Carmilla tried taking a sip of her own cup, but it was hot. Laura was fascinated to see she had a catlike trick of testing for heat with the tip of her tongue, rosy and delicate, licking the rim of the cup and then sipping. It was really not the time to find this cute, and yet Laura found it adorable as the dangerous and haughty Carmilla of Karnstein Hall winced from the hot chocolate burning the tip of her tongue.

"I don't get many visitors you see." There was just a hint of bitterness in her tone.

Laura shook her head clear. Fascination was the word of the day, for this morning Carmilla had set aside her haughty demeanour of the young noble lady, the intense, flirtatious charm of the vampire and even the dry, obnoxious humour of the wit, in favour of something completely astonishing. Carmilla was playing the shy, ladylike hostess to a guest in her shabby home and pouring out hot chocolate for Laura as though they were having a tea party in the stateliest of stately homes. Truly, Carmilla had more facets than a diamond.

Somehow Carmilla had given up her cool façade of mystery this morning and allowed herself to be laid bare, well metaphorically speaking that is. Laura blushed at the direction of her thoughts. That is to say, she was more open and amiable, almost as if she enjoyed the chance of talking to someone, as though she had thirsted for conversation for years but had only ever received silence.

Laura's brow furrowed. It had never occurred to her until now that this mysterious, dashing, beautiful girl might be rather a lonely person. A lonely, evil person? Was that even possible?

She looked up to see Carmilla scrutinising her thoughtfully. Without thinking, she smiled a wide, heartfelt smile and saw the stunned shock register on Carmilla's face. She was far too pale to really blush, but her mannerisms were telling. Her cup and saucer clattered, a silver teaspoon fell to the floor. Laura could just about see Carmilla place her palm to her face in a nervous gesture as she bent to pick it up. But things were put to rights quickly and Carmilla assumed a calm and cool demeanour as before.

"Am I the first you've invited to tea?" asked Laura, smiling.

"No one else was as obnoxious to demand it," smiled Carmilla to show there was no rancour, "I wouldn't want to make a habit of it but I find myself having no objections in this regard." She returned Laura's smile shyly. Oh.

Sitting together at this small breakfast table, Carmilla's hand lay idle, flat on the table top near her cup. Laura's hand was close enough that their little fingers were close to touching, so close. Laura knew Carmilla saw it as well, they were both very aware of it. It was such a little distance and cost nothing to breach the gap, yet might cost everything in all other respects. So they sat there a while, not touching. Finally, it became too much and impulsively, Laura slid her little finger over and laid it over Carmilla's gently.

Carmilla looked away, but did not move her hand. She sipped, looking around her, and Laura's eyes followed.

It was a cosy space they were in. Carmilla had made her home not in the ruins of the castle, but an old cottage of some sort which still stood intact nearby. The many windows that let in the light suggested it had been some holiday place for the family to get away from the schloss, perhaps a hunting lodge or caretaker's house that had been once fixed up. Here and there were signs of the decay that beset the rest of the estate, but the house still had good, strong bones. There were exposed wooden beams and rafters and shelves that lined the walls with a myriad of different books. Carmilla was well read, then.

Besides the breakfast table they were sitting at, an old stone fireplace, a fourposter bed and a battered love seat with a knitted afghan thrown haphazardly over it made up the rest of the room that Laura could see. Carmilla, with no servants to attend her, was a messy, messy girl. But the place had a pleasant, old-fashioned look that was warm and inviting. It was simple, spare, and oddly cosy for a mostly angry and obnoxious noble. Wait. Old-fashioned. That reminded her.

"What year is it?" asked Laura suddenly.

Carmilla stared at her as though she'd lost her head. Laura would come to know this look rather well.

"Your non sequiturs and tangents never cease to amaze me thus far in our two days of acquaintaince," said Carmilla dryly. She took a sip of her cocoa. Laura slowly stroked Carmilla's little finger with her little finger. Carmilla froze, her lips against her cup.

"1872," answered Carmilla, a little grumpily. She took a sip and exhaled. Laura hid a smile. "What a strange question to ask. How can you not know the year? Ridiculous." But Carmilla had hooked her little finger delicately around Laura's and for a while they sipped their hot chocolate in silence.

So it was 1872. It explained a lot, and yet nothing at all.

Aside from the fact that Laura had many questions about how she got here, how she was going to get home, and what this strange adventure even meant, Laura had often wondered why it was Carmilla had not recognised her. That morning she had passed by the glass to see her own face looking back at her. She was herself, she looked like herself at any rate. She must have met an earlier Carmilla by the grave of Mircalla Karnstein. In the intervening years, perhaps Carmilla had forgotten that brief, late night encounter. As for the Carmilla who kissed her and kissed her and then mocked her so meanly just before biting her, when did _she_ come from? There were too many more questions arising every time she found an answer.

But no matter how hard she tried she couldn't come up with an answer for why she was even in these dreams in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The mystery is slooowly unfolding. Thanks again for reading so patiently.
> 
> I love everyone's comments, they make my heart sing!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The emerging, possibly epic story of Elle and Carmilla continues, with extra bonus Le Fanu dialogue from the original Carmilla text, worked into the picture. This is 1872 Carmilla after all.

The morning after their crazed night time escapade, Laura had meant to start interrogating Carmilla on what the menacing black coach was, who was inside it, and what harm they had meant to Carmilla. Really, she did. But then they were sitting together drinking hot chocolate as if they were just two girls who were maybe sort of becoming friends. Somehow she was distracted by the unexpected magnetic pull of Carmilla's little finger linked to hers as they sat together companionably. It felt strangely right yet ever so slightly dangerous, though Laura couldn't explain why. Before long, without meaning to, there were other fingers touching, and then other fingers knitted together, until they were holding hands, palms resting closely, a building heat between them, as Carmilla's thumb stroked Laura's hand without thinking too much about it.

There had been no talk of the things that frightened them in the night this morning. Not yet. Laura watched with something like awe, a little smile on her lips, as Carmilla spoke animatedly about some obscure fact about the history of philosophy over her hot chocolate. She spoke of Héloïse and Abelard, who Laura knew were famous lovers who had been torn apart by fateful circumstance, never to meet again, and found each other again through writing letters, the only way left to them. She found time to wonder why Carmilla was bringing up the subject of lovers kept apart, but then Laura was watching her lips move and not hearing a word she said. Carmilla's melodious voice washed over her, her eyes brightened with interest every time she looked at Laura, and it made Laura want to do things, anything, to make her look at her again. She'd misbehave even, just for one more look her way, even if it was just Carmilla rolling her eyes at her. Oh this was bad, as Betty would say. This was very very bad.

"...Aaand you are not heeding a word I'm saying, are you, sweetling?" said Carmilla dryly. She waved a hand in front of Laura's face.

"What? No, I am, I was just thinking my dad would love to meet you," said Laura absentmindedly, turning the vase with her precious, perfect rose around and around.

"Who?"

"Oh, I mean my papa. He would love you. He loves philosophy."

There was a pause, as Carmilla sighed heavily and looked as though she would rather have heard anything but that. Laura fancied she saw regret in her eyes, and it reminded her of the lonely look she'd seen, fading away, of the other past Carmilla from her dream.

She had been so animated, talking of all kinds of subjects, conversing so cleverly on things Laura knew little about. It was amazing to see her, but heartbreaking at the same time, knowing that she mustn't have had that many people to talk to in this desolate place. And Laura, who would be lonely but for her father and her friends, had a big heart for girls who were lonely.

Carmilla had removed her hand and seemed to be chewing over something distasteful. Laura felt the loss with some confusion.

"Yes. Your father. I suppose you must leave now, your papa might be missing you." Oh.

It was ridiculous. But she didn't want to leave this strange girl who she had only know all of two days. What was between them - this couldn't be a thing that she was imagining on her own could it? It felt too sudden, too great, too overwhelming. Her heart was in her throat. The fact was, she was at a loss. This was a world that she didn't belong to, and all she knew here was Carmilla.

Laura laid her warm hand over Carmilla's. But Carmilla slipped it away. Laura hesitated.

"Ah. About that. My papa is far away, so at the moment, I'm all alone."

"I see," said Carmilla, looking away thoughtfully.

"Carmilla," said Laura, shifting closer.

"Elle." Carmilla shifted away a little further, looking at Laura nervously.

Laura laid her hand gently on Carmilla's slim leg. The fabric of her black riding breeches was soft under her hand, and under that, the muscle of Carmilla's leg tensed.

"We're friends now, aren't we?" said Laura softly.

She waited, but Carmilla didn't answer. Laura took a deep breath and tried again.

"I think my father would like that I've found - that I've found a friend. It gets lonely at home. Can't I stay with you, as we are, at least until my father returns home? He would thank you. You must get lonely too, I think."

"Must I?" Carmilla laughed harshly. "No. I don't see how that is possible, and I don't think that would be wise. " She shook her head, laughing again at nothing, mirthlessly. "Why would you even want to stay here? This place is a living hell." She lowered her head into her hand.

"But with you here, I thought that -"

"Did you not hear a word yesterday? Danger lurks here, my foolish one. Evil has a home here. Anyone who is with me is in danger. You are a child and you know nothing. There are things here that you should be very afraid of."

She glanced up, and something in her face hit Laura right in the chest. She looked exactly as she had in the dream where they had kissed for the last time. Laura still remembered, her body still remembered the frantic hunger of that kiss, and then the look of absolute fear and mute apology in Carmilla's face, just before she laughed so mockingly and bit her.

 _"If you want me, come find me."_ Laura set her shoulders, determined.

"Well, maybe I am a child and know nothing. Everything was a blur yesterday. But if you told me what was going on, I would know something at least. Yet you tell me nothing." Laura absentmindedly rubbed her hand up and down Carmilla's leg as though she remembering how Carmilla calmed her horse down. Carmilla froze.

"Why go through the trouble of saving me from some danger you won't even tell me about and then let me go back into that danger unprepared. I mean, maybe you weren't intending to save me but -"

"Don't be silly, of course I was," she sighed grumpily, as though Laura had worn her down, "trying to save you from yourself and your reckless, headstrong ways. What a fool I've been. In merely two days you've - Do you know you are a bothersome little gnat? Did you not hear me say that it is more dangerous with me than without me? It's me you should be afraid of, don't you understand?" Carmilla burst out crossly but there was no real malice in it anymore.

"Oh I heard you. But I'm willing to take that chance," said Laura, noticing Carmilla's shift in tone and breaking out in a relieved, sunshine smile, feeling as though she had just won a prize. Carmilla shook her head.

"You are a fool and no mistake."

"We can be fools together then, for if I am one so are you. Can we be friends now or are there other insulting things you wish to say to me? I'm sure somewhere deep down inside that dark and brooding exterior there must be some feeling you have for me besides dislike," Laura teased.

"I tolerate you," said Carmilla haughtily. She rolled her eyes. "I suppose I can tolerate you for another day, since you insist on placing yourself in danger and clearly need supervision."

"Oh thank you!"

Neither Laura nor Carmilla expected that Laura should hurl herself bodily at Carmilla in a sudden, violent hug, warm and tight and slightly disorienting - but it happened.

Carmilla patted Laura on the arm shyly, almost awkwardly, but then Laura leaned back and their faces were a hair's breadth apart, lips parted. They stared at each other as though someone had just come by and hit them both over the head with a blunt instrument and they were seeing stars. Laura's eyes were beginning to feel far too heavy, but as they began to close and lean closer, Carmilla jumped up, flustered, oddly flustered for such a cool headed mystery girl.

"Come, I will show you," Carmilla said, her voice hoarse and low, "there are certain rules you must understand."

"Rules. Rules are good. I like rules," said Laura, red-faced and somewhat flustered herself. She cleared her throat.

"Just enough so you can break them, I suppose," Carmilla said, leading her to the door. "Are you half in love with danger that you would disobey my orders?" 

"Having not been told what those dangers are, I wasn't aware I had to follow your orders, in this or any other matter," retorted Laura, smiling in obvious insincerity. Carmilla hid her smiles.

Before she knew it, they were out in some beautiful garden with a walled shrubbery by the old cottage, which made a confusing picture against the backdrop of ruinous destruction just beyond. A profusion of roses grew here too, bordering the garden, but no rose was as beautiful as the one Laura had chosen and Carmilla had picked for her.

Carmilla began to explain the boundaries and the landmarks that were safe, and beyond, the places that were not.

"I suppose you've already deduced this entire place is under an enchantment," said Carmilla tentatively, as they walked together. "For instance, I might as well tell you time doesn't flow here exactly as it might anywhere else outside. A day, a week here might pass without being noted outside the boundary. It makes life very... dreary sometimes, when you have no one to talk to. But at least your papa won't be anxious by your absence." Their hands bumped against each other as they walked and it seemed a natural thing to hold on.

"I had no idea, it looks like a perfectly ordinary, abandoned estate full of unknown terrors to me," said Laura dryly. "So, wow, it's enchanted." Carmilla bumped her shoulder.

"As am I," added Carmilla, risking a glance at her.

"I thought that was just your natural winning personality?" Carmilla rolled her eyes at Laura.

"I am bound by certain laws that I cannot speak of, tasks that I must perform," she continued, "but others who would do harm are bound by them also. The rules are so... oddly important for an enchantment to work." She looked at the sun shining on a distant hillside, far away from them. Evil seemed very far away from them at this moment.

"Sometimes that means if you follow the rules very strictly, you might find a space in between the rules, perhaps a chance -"

"A chance?"

"Hmm. You know, to find some way to be free of it." Carmilla shrugged as if she didn't quite believe that was possible. "But no doubt the stars have to align and all that kind of thing for that to happen. Making it almost impossible." Her voice trailed away uncertainly.

"Well I'm not bound by any rules, so I can ask you questions right?"

"Do I have any choice in this matter with one such as you, curious little bumblebee?" said Carmilla in a dry tone, "You can ask but there may not be an answer. It is perhaps better that you ask no questions for your own safety." She chewed on her lip, thinking. "Does that scare you, to be lost in the dark?"

"No," said Laura, turning her head. "Not while I'm with you." They stared at each other. Carmilla's eyes dropped for a second and then stared ahead.

"So you are unafraid of magic, of enchantments? Or m- monsters?" she asked lightly, as though she didn't care about the answer.

"I wouldn't say I was unafraid," said Laura, pondering the question, "but I guess I try not to judge the unknown or the unusual without knowing anything. Everyone deserves a chance, even monsters. Unless they clearly mean harm to me," she added, looking at Carmilla carefully. "You're right, maybe I know little of the world. But I'd want to know the world, Carmilla, not to hide from it."

"Sometimes you don't have a choice," said Carmilla, sadly, "but to hide. Sometimes you cannot leave. Do you know what it's like to be unable to be free, always looking behind you?"

"A little," said Laura, thinking of her overprotective dad. These dreams had in some ways allowed her to be freer than she'd ever been. Especially rushing through the world with Carmilla on horseback, running from danger, the wind against them. She'd never felt so reckless, so alive, and it wasn't even real life. If only she could merge her dream life bravery with real life.

Carmilla gave her a curious, searching look.

"If you stay here, with me, you'll be safe enough by the cottage, I think. From some things. No one would dare face a va- um, but if you venture too far out, I cannot vouch for what will happen," Carmilla frowned. "Also, I am probably a terrible host, I sleep a lot and am apt to be very grumpy if woken up too early in the mornings. Do you still want to stay?"

"You know I do," said Laura softly, squeezing her hand. Carmilla smiled at her then, a brilliant smile, as if her heart were in it. Laura forgot to breathe. If she hadn't known better, Laura could have sworn they had known each other forever.

* * *

 

"Now tell me about the black coach and four," said Laura staunchly. "Tell me why they chase you, what do you run from? Why are you here, in this place?" They were sitting on the grassy patch just outside the stone step by the doorway of the cottage. Carmilla was showing no care for the grass, as she nervously kept plucking blades of grass and ripping them to shreds or throwing them into the wind.

"Most young ladies would not want to hear about such fearsome subjects," said Carmilla, "but you, dearest, you like to rush headlong into matters that do not concern you."

"Well, as I said, you and I are different from most young ladies, aren't we?" retorted Laura. "If you'd suddenly been kidnapped by a strange girl who gave you a perfect rose after yelling at you for trying to pick it, and then raced all over the countryside to escape a black coach of pure menace, I think you might be a little curious too."

"Touché."

But still Carmilla seemed too frightened or too stubborn to say more. Suddenly Laura got up and plumped down on Carmilla's lap, straddling her, so she couldn't escape. Surprised and not a little... affected, Carmilla leant back on her arms.

"What are you doing?!"

"I'm just sitting here until you tell me. Don't worry, I won't bite," smirked Laura, before realizing what she'd just said. She tried to ignore the fact that Carmilla's sad eyes dropped to her bare neck. "I'm sorry, are they the questions I should not have asked?" Carmilla signed heavily.

"Elle, you are quite right to ask me that, or anything. I don't mean to be always so cold, so difficult. But I am under vows, no nun half so awfully, and I dare not tell my story yet, even to you. The time is very near when you shall know everything. You will think me cruel, very selfish I think."

She paused, despondent, and another clump of grass met its death upon the wind.

"Were you ever at a ball?" she asked abruptly.

"No, never. What was it like?" Laura was wondering where this was going, and she patiently waited.

"I almost forget, it was years ago. Well, I remember everything about it--with an effort. I see it all, as divers see what is going on above them, through a medium, dense, rippling, but transparent. There occurred that night what has confused the picture, and made its colours faint." Carmilla hesitated, staring at the ground, then went on. "I was all but assassinated in my bed, wounded, and never was the same since."

"What?! What do you mean? Were you near dying?" said Laura, confused by her words, worried. The silence around them had made Carmilla's strange words even more potent.

"Yes, very," Carmilla laughed again, that joyless, almost soundless laugh that had frightened Laura before. "Call it what you will - call it --a cruel love--strange love, that would have taken my life." Carmilla swallowed and an expression of pain twisted her face into something heartbreaking.

"Love will have its sacrifices. No sacrifice without blood."

Carmilla stopped for a moment and suddenly pulled Laura close as she sat in her lap, squeezing her body tight. Laura wasn't sure what she should feel, but she cradled Carmilla's head to her chest, tangling her fingers through her hair.

"Are you afraid? Of me? You do not understand, do you?" came Carmilla's muffled voice.

"No, I don't understand. But I - I want to. It sounds terrible, horrible. Were you attacked? Did the people in the carriage who chase you now, attack you?" said Laura in concern. "Why do they want to harm you?"

Carmilla laughed again, her face buried and Laura felt her body shake. She was beginning to suspect that Carmilla laughed in that way every time she wanted to cry, but could not. She held her tighter and after a while, Carmilla was calm.

"No, quite the opposite. Worse. If anything, the tale would tell that she saved me, she raised me till I was no longer a child, stole me away from what would have been certain death, by her own hand. And now I am bound and I can't get out."

"Who? Who are you speaking of? Who is doing this to you, who is making you afraid?" Laura persisted, running her fingers gently through Carmilla's hair.

"My Mother."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Modern Carmilla is, um, a little tied up at the moment, so don't expect her to appear too too soon. I am also anxiously awaiting her appearance, believe me!
> 
> For now, you'll have to be satisfied with poor past Carmilla and her tragic backstory if that's okay. ;)
> 
> Thanks for reading, enjoy!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our crazy kids, gay broody Carmilla and 'Elle' have, um, a moment, complete with some original quotes from Le Fanu and a lot of purple prose from me.

Something was going to happen tonight.

Laura could feel it in her bones, in every atom of her being, she could feel it. The air was oppressive. It pressed against her, pushed her into place. It was like the day had just wanted to comfort her, and holding her close in a tight embrace, it ended up suffocating her.

Something was going to happen.

Laura had lost count of the days, of how many days she had not woken up. It had been only a few days, or had it been more? Carmilla had not been exaggerating when she spoke of time flowing differently in that place. Some days it seemed to stretch as long as year in a day, and at other times she was sure that she and Carmilla had simply known each other as children and all the years after. There seemed to be memories, so many fleeting memories, which filled up all the days before she lost track.

Every morning, the bells rang and every morning she was still dreaming. And awake. What was she still doing here? Why was she here? Would she ever get home? She was getting antsy for answers. The days had all blended into each other now that so much of her attention had been taken up by Carmilla. Talking to Carmilla, staring at Carmilla, thinking about Carmilla. Trying not to touch Carmilla, so much. Investigating Carmilla, of course, that probably should have headed the list.

She was slowly forgetting that she still had to be wary of Carmilla, that she was an unknown quantity. She so far seemed more like a snarky and occasionally haughty girl than a monster. But she'd also confided in Laura, trusted her, little by little, and though she refused to admit it, to Laura they were friends now. She hadn't tried to bite Laura once.

The few times Laura did remember to beware, she felt incredibly guilt-ridden. She wasn't sure if she was relieved or felt really guilty that Carmilla still knew her as Elle, that she was hiding so much from her. But they were even, for Carmilla hid even more, that much was clear. From her past dreams, she knew there was so much more mystery to Carmilla. For some reason, Carmilla wanted to pretend that she was simply a girl under an unfortunate enchantment. She would say nothing more.

The truth was, there were so many lies between them already, they had all just tangled up till you couldn't tell one end from the other. Laura didn't exactly know what to do about that. It made her uncomfortable. A relationship - well, a friendship - founded on lies of omission was perhaps not the strongest foundation they could have had. And if Laura ever woke up from the dream... well. She didn't want to think about it.

Laura was waiting. She paced anxiously. She'd already started stress cleaning, Perry style. It was long, long past the time that Carmilla usually came back from her travels outside.

* * *

 

"I'm going on patrol, don't leave the cottage," Carmilla said tersely. "Try not to do anything foolish, little Struwwelpeter." She'd said this every day so far. Though Laura had hopes of tagging along on her dangerous patrol rounds, Carmilla so far had successfully avoided taking her along.

One thing Laura's ace reporter skills had observed was that the curse apparently demanded that Carmilla had to ride around the old grounds of the ruins and act like an obnoxious and bratty noble to anyone who dared venture near. Of course, Carmilla never confirmed this in so many words, but she did roll her eyes and didn't deny it.

Thus every day she would ride out on her black steed to slap the hands of anyone who dared pick a rose from the side of the road which bordered Karnstein Hall. That, in a nutshell, was what the scary rhyme probably referred to. Hand-slapping for petty flower theft. In 1872, people clearly had too much time to kill.

Carmilla ignored this Laura version of events and calmly pointed out that it was also useful to patrol the grounds to ensure no undesirable elements ever dared enter.

And then her horse pawed at the ground and gave Laura the stink eye.

"Er, I don't think your horse likes me very much," said Laura, backing away tentatively.

"Oh he will like you, if I say he must, if he knows what's good for him," said Carmilla sternly, directing her words at her horse, tapping her riding crop on her boot significantly. The horse snorted, unafraid.

"Oh. _Ohh_!" said Laura, realizing. "You want your horse to like me too." She couldn't help smiling. She picked off a piece of hay that had stuck to the top of Carmilla's riding boot and then brushed some invisible dust from Carmilla's leg, smiling to herself.

"I never said I - It's not because I like - I'm just saying it would behoove him to like everybody," said Carmilla, flustered.

"Because one way to be a Big Bad deterrent is to have your grumpy horse like everybody who comes in here?"

"Oh be silent!" Carmilla said crossly, before riding off.

If there was a more attractive view than Carmilla, dressed in an elegant black riding habit, riding off into the distance on a stallion, Laura didn't know what it was. Gah. _Worst. Crush. Ever._

* * *

 

It was silly, but they did silly well together sometimes. Laura liked that. She liked all the sides of this Carmilla she'd seen so far.

That silly exchange seemed so long ago.

Night had already fallen, and this black evening, a thick blanket of clouds covered the stars. A storm was coming, lying wet and heavy on the air.

Just as Laura was really starting to worry, Carmilla came back, much grimmer than she'd left. She looked shaken, but said nothing. Laura couldn't help but throw herself at her into a tight hug of relief, and to her surprise, Carmilla returned it just as tightly, her face lingering just a fraction too long by Laura's, until she abruptly pushed her away.

"Is everything... okay?" asked Laura tentatively. "I was getting kind of worried."  
"Fine," came the curt response.

Something strange was in the air, a magnification of all the time they had spent avoiding getting too close of late, some crackling, electric spark that threatened to set everything ablaze. Laura felt it immediately, and felt confused, molten with a sudden desire that came completely out of nowhere, and not a little frightened.

It got a little better inside. After a while, things were aping normality. As normal as it got anyway. The fire was lit and the cottage warmed up with a comforting yellow glow that pressed up against the windows and kept the coming storm at bay.

At first they talked, long into the night, not wanting to go to bed, for there was only the one four poster bed in the cottage. Too many nights had been spent sleeping far apart, sharing the large bed, only to end up far too cosy together by morning. They never spoke of it.

Laura wanted to make her laugh, she joked and teased and told her all the funny, silly stories of herself she knew. She told her the sad story of how she was bullied as a child, and the happy story of how it got slowly better.

Then Carmilla was talking, talking, talking of anything but what had happened that day. It was worrying, but Laura tried not to pry, as hard as that was for her to do.

Carmilla spoke of stories she'd loved as a little girl. Tristan and Iseult, the great lovers. Guinevere and Lancelot. Laura loved the sound of her voice, the musical cadence, watched her as she spoke, as she ran a tired hand through her hair. Noticed as Carmilla flinched when their hands touched when she passed a book from her shelf to Laura. That was just a brief moment where the mask fell and then all was well again when Carmilla smiled.

"It's this one, Undine, by Baron Fouqué, have you read it?" asked Carmilla, animatedly, opening the cover of the old book. "One of my favourites."

"No, what's it about?" asked Laura, peering over the colour plates, feeling very aware of how close they were.

"About a water spirit who marries a knight to gain a soul. But he finds out she's an otherwordly creature, and though he tries in the beginning not to be repulsed, eventually he rejects her because of what she is and who her family is, and marries another, a human maiden instead. Then Undine comes back and kills him, with a loving kiss. His heart breaks from the heaviness of her tears. It's a wonderful, difficult, mixed up story, for a fairytale. Of course nothing ends happily." Carmilla stared at the pages, smoothing them down with her hand.

"It sounds... very sad, Carmilla," said Laura, looking at her carefully. Carmilla was in a dark mood. Perhaps now was not the time for jokes or the impromptu puppet theatre she sometimes did with the teaspoons. She was curious. "Why - why do you speak of so many stories about troubled love and enchantment and lovers broken apart through circumstance?"

Carmilla seemed to suddenly realise that they were sitting close to each other on the love seat, their heads bent over the pages together. She drew back and stared at nothing in front of her.

"How romantic you are, Carmilla, with your wild nonsense" said Laura, smiling, gently teasing. "Whenever you tell me your story finally, I think it will be made up chiefly of some one great romance."

Carmilla shook her head gravely. She didn't smile, she refused to be teased, in fact the whole atmosphere in the room had grown sombre and serious. She drew a finger over the open page, feeling the texture of the paper. Laura touched the page too, until their hands lay side by side.

"Is it because - have you ever been in love, Carmilla?" Laura asked softly, hesitating. It was always difficult to broach private things with her. "You spoke before of a cruel and strange love, that nearly killed you. At this moment, is there -" She covered Carmilla's hand with her own, squeezing.

Carmilla laughed shortly, and removing the book from Laura's hand, closed the book with a snap, a little viciously. She sat in silence as though gathering her thoughts, her head in her hands. By now, Laura knew her well enough to wait, but she felt a sickening dread that she wouldn't hear what she wanted to hear, and an even worse fear that she would hear exactly what she wanted to hear.

"I have been in love with no one, and never shall," Carmilla whispered, staring at nothing, until she finally turned and stared intensely at Laura, "unless it should be with you." Her voice was so low as to be hoarse, as though she had to force the words out. The air stilled between them.

Laura stifled a gasp. Her heartbeat suddenly sounded so loud it was deafening. It was in her oblivious little head to wonder what Carmilla meant, what she could possibly really mean. It was one of those slippery things to say. To go from hardly any word at all, to this word. This word. All in the space of - well who knew how long? No one had ever in her life said anything remotely like that to her, and the sound of it was a heady rush. She'd been on casual dates before, sure, had romantic relationships - but nothing so deep, nothing so important for the word love. Her face flamed. She felt dizzy and dreadfully happy. She felt a tumultuous confusion, as though she was living underwater and the 21st century, with all its words designed for a short attention span, seemed very far from her just now. 

Without knowing what she was doing, like one who sleepwalks, she took the book gently from Carmilla's hands and got up to put it back on the shelf in its place. She needed space to think.

It had been taken from the high shelf, so Laura slowly climbed the ladder that had been propped up there earlier. She tried. She regulated her breathing, she regulated her climbing. She tried to regulate everything she could regulate, but she was drunk on something heady and intoxicating. Carmilla was everywhere.

Up high on the ladder, her only focus now was the book. She tried and tried again to put it away, but her hands shook badly.

Suddenly, she felt a weight on the ladder below her. It was Carmilla, who climbed slowly up until she too was as high as she could go. Her body pressed gently against Laura's and she could feel them touching at every point, with hardly any space between them. Carmilla silently took the book out of Laura's trembling hand, brushing against her fingers, and easily reached the last few inches to replace it on the shelf.

Laura stifled a soft whimper that escaped from her lips. Every nerve was shivering now. Her head had grown too heavy, too dizzy, and she leant it on the rung closest to her, gripping the ladder till her knuckles were white. She breathed heavily as though thorns had grown inside her and every raspy breath had to fight to enter or escape. She was afraid, but god she wanted her so badly.

But Carmilla had removed herself and climbed down the ladder as silently as she'd come up. Looking down, Laura could see that she was looking away, again staring at nothing. But she was breathing heavily herself and no longer trying to hide it. Her shoulders were set as though she had made a decision. Still no words passed between them.

Outside, it had begun to storm. The rain came down, beating an uneven staccato rhythm on the roof. It was hard to hear anything in this storm, but some enchanted cocoon seemed to envelop them both.

Laura descended slowly, almost fearfully. Near the middle, the ladder felt firmer, for Carmilla had turned, putting her hand on the worn wooden frame, and was steadying it for her. One step. Two steps. Getting closer.

Carmilla did not move away, neither out of politeness nor anything else. Her hand stayed where it was, propping up the ladder, waiting for her to come down. As Laura descended her loose flowing skirt draped over Carmilla's arm, lifting slightly, then higher. Then suddenly Laura felt Carmilla's soft hand slowly sliding up her thigh under her skirt, scarily hot, and as she took her last step down Carmilla's body leaned against hers, half trapping her. She turned and gasped, only half knowing what she was getting into. Carmilla bent forward, the softest lips she ever felt were on hers, kissing her deeply and hungrily, as though they were made for that purpose. Then Carmilla pushed her against the shelves, never breaking the kiss, and the books shook with her.

Carmilla was, oh god, finally kissing her and she felt a terrifying passion rush through her, jolting her hips against her, making her knees buckle and her bones melt in some way that she wouldn't have believed before now. These things just didn't happen in real life, did they? Then with soft sighs, Carmilla was licking with her tongue, nibbling, biting at her lips gently, dragging her soft lips down her neck in hot, sucking kisses, burying her face in her hair. All the while her hands roamed up and down her body as though she could never get enough of touching her.

"Darling, darling," she murmured strangely, urgently, almost as though she were speaking to herself, "I live in you; and you would die for me, I love you so."

Laura didn't know what to think. The words set her on fire but they were so strange to hear that fear was never far behind. Her body was deciding for her, but something in her mind was screaming incoherently and she didn't know why, for desire, for love, for danger or darkness.

"Carmilla, I don't understand -" Laura murmured back, before dizzyingly returning the tumultuous kisses. Laura's tongue slipped into Carmilla's mouth, touching, exploring that warm, soft space, all kinds of feelings exploding deep inside her, and she didn't care what happened anymore. She held Carmilla's head tightly, running her fingers through her hair, pulling her impossibly closer.

Her mind was useless right now, suppressing any alarms. Was she in thrall? Was Carmilla in thrall? Carmilla's hand had frantically moved from stroking her thigh under her skirt to her soft breast, palming it gently over cloth as she kissed her long and hard. Her leg was in between Laura's, pushing against her, her trembling fingers undoing laces before reaching in, touching soft skin. It felt like nothing she could remember, and Laura moaned despite herself. She leaned further into her wandering hands as they played and toyed and teased, needing her. Every fibre of her being was trembling for her.

"You must come with me, loving me, to death; or else hate me and still come with me, and hating me through death and after," murmured Carmilla in a low voice, sucking hard on her soft skin with warm soft bites.

"Come with you where?" sighed Laura, distractedly. "Oh, Carmilla, wait, wait. Please, wait." Laura tilted her head back a little, and it landed with a thud against the books.

Carmilla waited. She stilled herself, her head against Laura's shoulder, breathing heavily, only drawing her fingers over the skin of Laura's collarbone lightly. Laura cradled her head in her hands, her chest heaving.

"What is happening?" asked Laura, dizzy, her lips swollen, her eyes heavy. "What are we doing?" She caressed Carmilla's hair, her face, her neck, crooning gentle words in her ear, trying to comfort a hurt she didn't understand. "Love -"

At that fateful word, Carmilla wrapped her arms around Laura, holding onto her tightly. They stood there, holding onto each other for a long time. Then her hands moved to stroke Laura's back gently, until her nails scratched slightly at her shoulder.

"Come to bed with me," she whispered in Laura's ear, low and hungry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings gentle readers!
> 
> Yeah, so that happened. I hope you guys don't hate this chapter. I reserve the right to maybe change it later, I wasn't entirely happy with it. But the plot must move on!
> 
> They're in this kind of dream like world of 1872 and there is a grand, passionate love affair between 'Elle' and Carmilla that causes all sorts of changes in the present day. Carmilla of 1872 is a very brooding, romantic person who's prone to melancholy and vampiric heroics (no matter what she says), especially as an enchantment has been laid upon her. Poor Laura is still oblivious to a certain extent, a little bit more like Laura from the novella. Just making this point because Le Fanu's Carmilla is so very out there and so are her words.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading my little story and thanks for your comments!
> 
> (Also, updates will take longer from here on in because life).


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla and 'Elle' just keep having that moment. Or, other moments. Interspersed with silliness and some more revelations.
> 
> Extra long chapter so, buckle up creampuffs.

"Don't be frightened," whispered Carmilla, her lips pressed against the top of Laura's head. "Are you?"

She withdrew slightly to see Laura's mute reply in her wide eyes staring back, lips parted. Her breath was ragged. Laura was seated on the edge of the bed and Carmilla was standing before her, cradling her head close, as tenderly and caring as if Laura had woken up from a nightmare. Laura felt so confused with the conflicting emotions inside her, that had screamed to an unbearable pitch. This was madness. A dream, yet not a dream. Everything was happening too quickly. What was happening, what was she really doing here? Was it time to run? Was it time to wake up? Laura was torn into so many little pieces. Finally she would be scattered into the wind.

All around them was lamplight and firelight, shadows flickering around the walls as the flames leapt and threatened escape from the hearth. It was a dark fairytale world. It was warm enough, yet Laura shivered.

A steady patter of rain drummed on the roof, and every now and then a forceful gust of wind, howling with fury, shook and rattled the window panes with heavy droplets falling from the eaves. She leaned imperceptibly closer to Carmilla, as if she could protect her from her confusions, when she was the source of it. She could feel Carmilla's tense hesitation.

Despite her earlier ferocity, pushing Laura against the old books with a heady, hungry need, Carmilla had grown gentle as they came to bed. She pushed back Laura's hair from her face, she kissed her forehead softly, then kissed a slow line from the corner of Laura's eyebrow, down her cheek to the corner of her lips, which trembled.

"We need not do what frightens you, little dove," said Carmilla quietly in her ear, before nuzzling into her, running her hands in circles on her back. "Do you understand?"

Laura knew what Carmilla meant. Did she understand what was going to happen? After all, she was a sheltered, isolated maiden of this age, likely kept in the dark by her elders when it came to human relations. Would she know what two people did in bed, alone on a dark night? Well Laura of the 21st century _technically_ understood, but she didn't really.

Laura had been on casual dates. Sure she had. Laura had had romantic relationships. Well, a fling. Well, a relationship. A fling. Laura didn't know what it was, it hardly seemed important now. It lasted all of three months, before her dad found out and looked disappointed, saying she was perhaps too young and should focus on school. At the time, she didn't mind so much, dating was just a thing everybody else did in her small town, so she did it too, but there weren't many in her small town who she had much in common with. School did keep her pretty busy, what with the school paper and all. Laura was always hunting down the answers to some story or other. Then she was a freshman at Silas, and there were yet more casual dates when she had the time in between her 18 hour work days - and there was Danny, a crush which was hardly anything at all and never had a chance to begin since this distracting dream girl took over her life. So, being so busy, she was still - _you know_. And not that it was hugely important but she wouldn't mind not being - well, _you know_.

But then, this was a dream wasn't it? Even if it felt so real, even if some things carried over to real life, did what happen in the dream stay in the dream? If she - _you knowed_ \- would she still be - _you know_ \- in real life? It wasn't as if Laura was all about romance but this was as scarily romantic as it got, in the most eerily gothic way possible, that she was sure her mind must be playing tricks on her. Because Carmilla was... Carmilla was... well she just _was_. There, ever present, impossibly beautiful, vibrant and real and unreal and so very troubling to Laura's senses, awake or asleep.

Was it even possible that her first real love could be a dream? To lose something of yourself, what everyone said was such an important part of you, to a dream, what would that be like? Would it be embarrassing and awkward and not something she could ever tell anyone ever? Would it be wonderful and fantastical and again not something she could ever tell anyone ever? Or would it be just plain frightening, to be so heavy with want and desire for something she just didn't understand?

Carmilla was looking down at Laura, with something like tenderness in her eyes, but hidden behind that was something else, something dark. Perhaps something monstrous. She didn't know what the truth was. There were far too many layers and Laura wanted to unpeel them all and get to the real heart of Carmilla herself. Metaphorically speaking, that is.

"What if I want to do what frightens me?" whispered Laura.

Carmilla stilled her fingers, which had been running through Laura's hair, lightly teasing the locks until they ran like some golden liquid through her hands. She sighed heavily.

"God, what am I doing?" she muttered under her breath, "Naive, provincial girl. Entirely too tightly wound. I ought to know better." Oh. Really.

"Uh," said Laura, her eyes narrowing, "I can hear you. I'd like to point out that you are also a girl who lives in the provinces. And you never seem to want to leave this place either." She was boldly flippant to hide her growing nervousness, though Carmilla standing so close right in front of her was doing dangerous things to her heartbeat.

"Well there's a difference between not wanting to leave and being unable to leave," retorted Carmilla, as she caressed Laura's face with a lazy finger, smiling a secret smile.

"What do you mean you can't -"

"Hush," said Carmilla, a finger to Laura's lips. "You have a habit of ruining my moments. There's just something about you. Just when I think you cannot be more ridiculous, you surprise me with -"

On instinct, Laura parted her lips and took Carmilla's finger between her teeth, the tip of her tongue licking it into her mouth, her lips closing around it, sucking lightly. She felt the shiver speed from her lips through Carmilla's finger and spread throughout her whole body. She looked up at Carmilla, her eyes wide, shocked at herself, and released her finger slowly, guiltily. Carmilla looked astounded and stood there for a split second until her knees buckled suddenly and in the end, it was Laura who pushed her onto the bed and kissed her wildly until they were all tangled up together.

It was Laura who pushed Carmilla's dazed hands away and slowly unlaced her nightgown, staring at her all the while with darkening eyes, who kissed her there and there, on her beautiful pale throat and collarbone, working her way down the soft skin with tiny little nibbling kisses.

Blushing furiously, Laura rested her hot cheeks against smooth skin that was so cool to the touch, caressing, breathing heavily and feeling Carmilla's chest rise and fall rapidly. Her fingers eased their way to Carmilla's soft breast and touched her there, shyly and tentatively, teasing her with a light fingertip until she could feel a hard bud rise up under the thin cloth. Oh dear god. Carmilla gasped and suppressed a whimper, and Laura was in awe at the realization that it was she who could make those noises come out of Carmilla. She wanted more.

Something was boiling up inside her, between them both, she could feel it, and dazed with the desire that pushed her body to behave in ways her mind couldn't keep up with, she simply followed her instincts. Carmilla's soft, wordless sounds were making her dizzy with the delight of it all. Her hand slipped between cloth and skin and she felt and touched and stroked everywhere, until it became too much for Carmilla and they struggled and fought, hungrily, hands on wrists, legs straddling hips, with their mouths on each other, never wanting to part.

First Carmilla let herself be pinned to the bed, her rich dark hair fanning out against the pillow and Laura straddling her and sucking her bottom lip into her mouth, nipping with her teeth. Laura flipped her smooth mane of honey brown hair to one side and there it lay, a curtain of hair in contrast against Carmilla's dark locks. For a beat, they stared at each other, before Laura leaned down. Everything around them darkened, they were in a world of their own. They kissed, their tongues exploring each other. Then Carmilla gave a low growl and Laura was flat on her back, her wrists held above her head. Carmilla's lips had travelled further down, until she spread open Laura's nightgown, placed her hot lips on her chest and kissed, sucking hard at the smooth skin.

"Oh god," sighed Laura weakly, as she looked down and saw a dark red mark on her skin. Carmilla had marked her. Carmilla smirked then, opening her mouth. "Don't say it," warned Laura, breathlessly, her hips shifting under Carmilla's weight. "Don't say what you were going to say."

Carmilla raised her fine eyebrow and bent down again, only to place her soft lips at Laura's breast and lick lightly and languidly, before sucking gently.

"Ohh -," Laura felt her entire body shudder at this almost alien feeling she had never felt before.

Some force had taken over her, jolting her insides with a visceral heat all twisted up inside, pulling and tugging at her. She wanted to scream, but all that came out of her was a strangled noise from her throat. She tensed up. Every atom was on fire there was none left to think. The air in the room turned suddenly, entirely serious, no longer playful.

"Shh," soothed Carmilla at her ear, her voice low and languid, sucking the earlobe gently, "Dearest, ask me to cease if you would have me cease."

Laura's only answer was to turn her face and kiss her desperately, and Carmilla covered her body once more with her own, hands and legs all tangled up in confusion, pulling their hips together into place, as close as they could get. It felt so right, so warm and safe, but Laura was still so afraid of it all. In the back of her head a thought came unbidden, what if Carmilla had put her in some kind of thrall? Was she really herself? What was she really doing? This was not like her, and yet, having never done anything like this before, could she really be sure it wasn't her? She doubted everything before her, even as they fit together so well.

Carmilla's hands roamed around her body freely now, exploring, squeezing, feeling whatever part of her she desired, and what she desired seemed to be all of it. Laura could not work it out, why it was her here with Carmilla, half naked, clothes all rumpled, and not someone else. Before too long all their clothes were off, and their naked bodies touched and slid against each other. Laura had never felt such soft skin against hers. They caressed each other by merely being pressed against each other, both of them shivering from the lightest touch. Never had she felt so tenderly loved.

Carmilla's hands and lips were everywhere, nails dragged lightly down her back, until they were where Laura needed them to be. She froze and her body stiffened as Carmilla's hand slid up her thigh, in a memory of earlier that evening, on that ladder, under her skirt.

Carmilla's voice was a whisper so quiet Laura could hardly hear it.

"Don't be afraid," she said softly, nuzzling Laura with her nose. "Dearest. Dearest. You do not know how dear you are to me. Trust me with all your loving spirit. You must not -" her hands gently but insistently pulled Laura's shy and timid legs, that were pressed so tightly together, slowly apart.

Then Carmilla's slow fingers teased, exploring delicately, and each stroke and caress sent strange fluttering feelings to Laura's nerves that built up higher and higher into an unwieldy tower that was sure to shake and collapse at any moment and destroy her. Carmilla's tapering fingers slid easily against Laura, determined to learn every inch of her, in circles and up and down, sliding in heady, slippery repetition, driving her crazy, until they eventually slipped inside her wetness and warmth. Laura half gasped, half moaned at the intrusion and felt surprised and alarmed at how quickly her body wanted it, sucking in the finger tightly, hips moving of their own accord as Carmilla's other hand was teasing at her breast and her lips were kissing her and kissing her. Was this what it was really like? This wonderful, dreadful, otherworldly experience? Yet Laura had never felt so vulnerable and human as now.

Carmilla was lost to herself and to Laura, her eyes half sunk with desire, her lips swollen. Laura began to hear half-spoken words here and there come from her lips as she kissed her, but she couldn't quite make out anything until finally Carmilla's voice grew desperate with wanting her.

"You are mine, you shall be mine, you and I are one for ever," Carmilla whispered, almost with a sob, pushing in deeper. Laura felt full of her.

Even as that possessiveness frightened Laura, it thrilled her as well, and she gave a low moan. Carmilla was inside her, she was a part of Carmilla. They moved together now, on pure instinct, thinking of nothing but pleasure, bodies rocking together, fingers stroking in and out, slow and then fast, thumb teasing circles into her. The sighs coming from Laura lit a wild fire in Carmilla's eyes. That unsteady tower grew higher as Laura's hips pushed up against Carmilla's teasing hand, drawing her fingers in more deeply still. They moved frantically, erratically, Laura's voice gasping and sighing at every new feeling Carmilla's fingers pushed inside her, growing tighter and tenser in some wicked embrace, until finally, finally Laura came apart in her hands with a gentle cry, hips jerking, shuddering and trembling against her. Her body shook and fluttered around Carmilla's fingers. The tower toppled to a heap on the ground as Carmilla held her close, utterly destroyed.

Laura breathed heavily, deep ragged breaths, she hardly knew what she felt, her body felt everything and was now part of the whole universe at last. There was nothing left of her, Carmilla had taken it all.

Carmilla was still. She slowly withdrew her fingers, caressing her skin, soothing her. Laura felt empty and spent with the loss of it. A trail of wetness, evidence of desire, lay on her skin, but Carmilla didn't seem at all troubled by it and in time Laura forgot to feel awkward. Laura raised her eyes shyly to lock gazes with her and was astonished to find Carmilla looking back with a kind of adoration and marvel, almost as though she'd never seen or experienced this before and she thought Laura must be some kind of miracle. Oh to be loved for who you were, really who you were. Laura's eyes began to brim over with unexpected tears, a stupid thing to do, a foolish, helpless damsel thing to do. She tried to fight it, but they came anyway, sliding down her cheek silently, only to be kissed away.

"Oh Elle," breathed Carmilla, lovingly. "My beautiful Elle."

Laura froze in her arms. This was so wrong. She wanted to be called by her name, her real name. But how could she tell her now? More silent tears came, unbidden, brushed away by Carmilla's gentle thumb.

Carmilla held her tight, and if Laura stopped thinking about all the things behind and before them, the lies they told each other and the truths they didn't tell, it was perfect.

"Run away with me," whispered Carmilla, twirling a lock of Laura's hair around her finger. "Elle, let's go away, together, away from this place." Laura looked at Carmilla, hesitating. The guilt was worming its way through to her consciousness. One day she would wake up and all this would be... over.

"Where would we go?"

"I know not," laughed Carmilla happily, "anywhere, just away from here. Paris. Vienna. Everywhere. Just you and I."

"I thought you said you couldn't leave?" said Laura, wonderingly.

Carmilla stilled her fingers, before bending down and lightly kissing her lips.

"It's true, I cannot leave," she started, looking serious.

"Tell me," breathed Laura, tucking a fallen lock of Carmilla's hair behind her ear.

"I can leave, but I will grow weak, as time passes. Or so it is said. In this place I am strong, away from it I fear I shall waste away slowly, ever dying."

"But Carmilla, everybody has to -"

"Do you know what a geas is?"

"Uh, I'm assuming you mean something to do with fairytales and not the -" Carmilla laughed shortly.

"Yes, dark fairytales for the living. Or the ones that never lived. It's part of an enchantment, rules I must follow lest a dreadful fate befalls me. It has been laid upon me."

"But how - why?"

Carmilla seemed to be considering her words carefully, biting her lip.

"I must thank you for not prying overmuch into my affairs thus far. It is hard for me to speak of, and indeed I am forbidden from saying very much at all. But I cannot be without you." She sighed. "Everything has changed now. Now I think, well perhaps I can be free. Perhaps happiness waits for me, however improbable that seems."

She gave Laura a troubled look, mutely asking for comfort. Laura reached out and caressed her face, waiting. Still, the guilt spread through her veins.

"Would it make you afraid of me to know that I -" she hesitated, "well I was - I had an accident, a severe accident, at the only real ball I ever attended, as I tried to tell you of.

It was - such a glittering affair, so wonderful, with the music and the gowns and the dancing. Oh Elle, you can't imagine. But, I was a foolish young girl, I had a little too much champagne, and even now I cannot say what happened.

This part you may find hard to believe, as I did, but as I lay, injured to the point of unconsciousness, a woman came out of the shadows. I did not know if it was a dream or real. She said she was the Queen of the Faeries, and she certainly looked the part but," Carmilla laughed, "I may have been a naive girl then but not such a fool as all that. I couldn't believe her at first and to be honest, I was in no state to try."

She hesitated, giving Laura a sidelong glance to gauge her reaction. But Laura didn't know what to think.

"After various magical proofs to me, as I lay near death, she offered me a choice. She could revive me back to health, and give me back my life, with certain conditions, if I would promise to be her daughter, as I had the likeness of her child who had passed away, she said. But what choice did I have, really? Who would choose an ignoble death? I was but a child, my parents were - I had to promise. I didn't know you see. I didn't know!"

"Was that your Mother?" asked Laura, her skin prickling at the memory of that sombre black couch and four, following them upon the road.

"Yes," breathed Carmilla slowly. "My Mother, or so she insisted that I call her. Not my true mother, for she had... died. I was once a mortal girl, like you. None of my family survived. I am the last of my kind." Laura held her close.

"She bound me to her, she wanted me never to leave, and so one of the conditions placed upon me was that I could not leave my home. Even through all the destruction, the burning, the mad, ruthless violence, the death of so many - here I stayed. People can be - so cruel." Carmilla's voice was neutral, as though she was seeing this through frosted glass and felt disconnected from it all. "And I, I found out I could be the cruelest of them all." Carmilla glanced at Laura.

"If I strayed, if I tried to run, I would start to feel the pain inside me, tearing into me viciously, forcing me to return. I must also ride around the boundaries of this place, protecting it from the outside world, for here lies one of the entrances to faeryland. No one may find it by will alone, so it matters not if I tell you. Is that not an impossible story for you to believe?"

Laura was silent for a moment. It was one of the strangest stories she'd heard and she really didn't know what to believe. Being at Silas had prepared her for some things, but this? It was all too overwhelming. And why hadn't Carmilla mentioned anything about being a vampire? Had they been all wrong about that? Carmilla looked so serious, she couldn't be lying, could she?

"And the rose?" asked Laura suddenly, as she caught sight of her single white rose on the table across the room.

"It is - special, as you might have guessed."

"But how? What does it do?"

"Dearest Elle, please do not ask too much of me," Carmilla hesitated. "I would answer all your questions, you have every right to ask, but that one I cannot. So many conditions my Mother placed upon me, I believe it would be almost impossible for me to ever leave. But in return she gave me certain powers."

Carmilla ran her palm lightly over Laura's middle.

"Yet I care nothing for these powers and would only have you, my love," she murmured, kissing her gently.

"How can we run away, if it kills you to be away from here?" persisted Laura. Carmilla sighed.

"I do not know. I have struggled against this, in vain, you must have seen. I cannot be without you. I want you. I want everything about you. Elle. For every enchantment, there is a way out, however slight, however impossible, and it is the time of the bells soon. With you here, I feel I can believe in such miracles again."

"You speak so cryptically Carmilla." Laura yawned suddenly, for the night had been long. She stopped to struggle back into her nightgown, for the air had grown chilly. "I want to understand. What about the bells, tell me -" Her head flopped back onto the pillow.

"No no, do not sleep, stay here with me," coaxed Carmilla. A hint of worry and alarm had entered her voice.

"Why, this is a bed, shouldn't we use it for its true purpose?" said Laura drowsily.

"Oh but we know now its true purpose is not for sleeping in," smiled Carmilla, her hands sliding up under Laura's breast. "And that is certainly something we can explore further if my Lady Beautiful wishes."

"But I am tired, all day I was worried for you," murmured Laura sleepily. The hands stopped.

"You were worried?"

"Yes, you were gone so long, and then you didn't say what had happened." Laura's eyes drooped wearily.

"No," said Carmilla, "I didn't." She hesitated, then glanced at Laura. "No, no, sweetheart, do not sleep just yet. Please, I beg you."

"Carmilla, I'm tired, you've tired me. Can't we talk tomorrow? I feel unable to -"

"If you sleep," Carmilla said slowly, "I don't know what will happen. She is spiteful, you can't think. Elle, do you hear me? Elle! If somehow, something happens - oh god," Carmilla thought for a minute. "If we are apart, if you are lost, follow the sound of the bells to Silas Field. You cannot miss that, no matter what enchantments are woven around the land. I will look for you there. I will find you. But I warn you, you must take care, you understand? It is a dangerous place and I hesitate to - please stay awake until the sun rises, my darling."

"I'm trying, I - mmf!!" Carmilla had kissed her with some desperation, which after a while, Laura returned languidly. Impossibly, a new flame of desire threatened to flicker back to life inside her. "Carmilla, as much as I'm enjoying this, I don't think this is going to help me keep awake."

"Ask me a question. Anything. I know how curious you are. I promise to do my best to answer, and not be so foolish, as long as you try and stay awake." 

"Umm," hummed Laura sleepily, her eyes fluttering shut, "all right what... what is your horse's name?" She yawned.

Carmilla blinked.

"You can ask me any question, about any of this - mystery," waving her hand around, "and you want to know what my horse's name is?"

"Mmmhmm," breathed Laura, nodding slightly, "I want to know so I can befriend him and he can stop hating me and you'll take me with you tomorrow. Oh it was wonderful, riding in the wind with you." She stretched her arms out slowly before trailing off.

Carmilla burst out laughing, shocking Laura into opening her eyes for a second.

"Oh you are wonderful. Wonderfully, adorably mad. There is no one like you that I have ever known, no one quite so ridiculous."

"So I've been told. Name please." Laura smiled with her eyes closed.

"His name is Calm Liar." Carmilla said, grinning to herself. "I call him Liar for short."

Laura opened one eye, frowning.

"Why on earth would you call your horse Calm Liar?" asked Laura dubiously. "That doesn't seem very nice. No wonder he hates everyone."

"Oh, I named him after me." She laughed to herself as though it was the greatest joke in the world. "Perhaps it's a little narcissistic of me but there you have it."

"I don't understand."

"It matters not, little bean, just a private joke between me and my horse. Next question?"

"Mmm," Laura whispered, pausing. "I have so much to ask you I can't even think."

Carmilla waited, but in the end she waited too long. Laura had finally fallen asleep, worn out by the night's events. No touching or prodding or poking would wake her.

Carmilla sighed heavily, leaning on one bare arm, naked in the firelight. She looked down at Laura, her dark eyes brimming over with sudden tears that threatened to fall, yet never did. Suddenly she got up, putting on her nightgown, and walking over, opened up a box on a nearby shelf. Taking out a small pair of scissors, she returned, and at the nape of Laura's neck, she cut a slender tendril of Laura's golden brown locks. Kissing it lightly, she placed both back in the box and returned to bed. Laura shifted and in her sleep, she felt Carmilla settle behind her, feeling warm and happy. She pulled her arm around her, lacing their fingers together. As the fire died down to embers, they both slept the sleep of the dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, gentle readers!
> 
> Life has been kicking some delicate part of my person, so sorry for the lack of updates.
> 
> A note: I actually wrote a number of different drafts to avoid any kind of unnecessary 'intimate relations' aka bad smut because I just can't write that stuff very well, with a straight face anyway. I know, very immature. I'm not sure it really fits the atmosphere of the story. Anyway, I realized after a while the story kinda had to have it to make sense later. So here it is, and I hope you all forgive me. Hope it wasn't too bad. :\
> 
> Additional note: Kinda cheating to tell rather than show in the chapter but I just wanted to quickly address something about Carmilla's character - it may seem like this is happening too fast, considering modern Carmilla is more of a 'gentlewoman' but keep in mind that time is doing wacky timey-wimey things (they've known each other way longer than we've seen, we don't know if it's a month or a couple of days), in isolated 1872s Styria people get close really quickly because there weren't that many opportunities to meet people (see Carmilla being all over Laura in the original novella) but most importantly from the story's point of view there is an air of desperation and fear in Carmilla, like this is the last chance she has before the big bad dangers come to wreak havoc. I meant it to be unsettling and slightly disturbing, at the same time that you see 'Elle' and Carmilla come together and start to really fall in love at the worst possible time for romance, both with their own secret agendas. No they really are not safe. Anyway, not sure if that really came across in the writing (I'm still learning!), I feel like I might have distracted everyone with their bedroom activities... Though I love hearing what you guys enjoyed and what you didn't. :)
> 
> Thank you for continuing to follow this story and as always I love hearing from you all. Comments put a spring in my step! :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, back at the ranch...
> 
> A flashback from Betty Spielsdorf.  
> It has also just occurred to the Silas gang that Silas University is all about the weird...

"Dad, do I have to?" Betty complained irritably, "I have so much to do and I thought it was settled, I'm going to Princeton?"

Not unusually for him, the General was polishing a prized samurai sword he usually kept on display in the den, puffing away on a chewed up cigar. Betty wrinkled her nose at the smell. On the kitchen table in front of him lay pieces of a rifle and a standard issue Enfield bayonet from 1917.

"Just, visit. Have a look around. For your old dad. What could it hurt? It's the closest international school to base and I'll be stationed here for the forseeable future. It would nice if you were nearby so you'd be safer and I could keep an eye on you."

General Spielsdorf held up his palm before Betty could say anything.

"Sweetheart, I know it's no Princeton or Harvard or Oxford, and I know it has a reputation for being a bit odd, but your grandmother Rheinfeldt went there and she always spoke of it with great affection."

"Dad, you put Gran in an instutition for crazy people!"

"Enough Betty. It's a nursing home with a focus on geriatric mental health. And that has nothing to do with the school she went to."

"Well can you at least drive me there, Dad? I don't want to go among weirdos without backup. It's a creepy place in the middle of nowhere. It probably doesn't even have the internet!"

"That's no way to speak of Gran's alma mater. It'll be good for you to be a little independent in a safe environment, you're always complaining I don't let you do enough on your own. It's a lovely little school housed in a pastoral valley in the Styrian mountains. It's the safest place I can think of, no harm can possibly come to you unless you crash into a mooing cow or a singing milkmaid. And even then there's no use crying over... spilt milk. Be a soldier, Spielsdorf!" The General gave a salute, which had always amused her as a little girl, but this time she rolled her eyes.

"Dad! Your dad jokes are getting worse and worse."

Having finished polishing the sword, the General put together the cleaned rifle in record time, everything snapping into place. Suddenly, steely-eyed, he flung the bayonet clear across the room through to his den, where it landed right between the eyes of a curious old antique painting of a dark haired young woman. Betty rolled her eyes again. Her dad had always been a little obsessed with weapons, being in the army and all, to the exclusion of all else.

"Just don't crash into a singing milkmaid and you'll do fine." That was as encouraging as he got. The General got up from the table and kissed a petulant Betty on the head, his cigar between his tobacco stained fingers. Betty coughed as the smoke drifted across her face. Sitting down at the armchair in the next room, he rustled his newspaper as a sign he was done with their conversation.

"Ok fine. But I won't like it. I'll go, take a look around and then I'm going to Princeton," Betty called out, grumbling as she carried a pile of textbooks under her arm and went to her room.

****

Silas University, unbelievably, was not on Google Maps yet. And Betty's cellphone coverage out here was shoddy at best. It wasn't long before she was lost somewhere between the valley and the mountains, with rolling green fields stretching before her and some kind of creepy forest to the side.

Betty stopped the car by the side of the road, rustling flat the old map her dad had bought for her. He was so old-fashioned. She'd never admit it, but she used to be ashamed of him coming to parent-teacher night, when all the other kids' parents were young and cool and her dad was a much older, much greyer general forever chewing on an old cigar who had a tendency to make strangers stand at attention and quake in their boots more than anything else.

She tried to compare the old map to the cartoonish touristy map she'd got sent from Silas University, which listed only the 'cool' landmarks on campus itself in an effort to promote itself as some dumb party school. Whatever, Betty didn't have time for parties, she didn't have time for Silas, she was valedictorian for goodness sake. No roads in, no roads out. Really helpful, Silas University map makers. What was her dad thinking, sending her here. Why would anyone want to go to this school?

Maybe if she could see the landscape better she'd have a clearer sense of where she was on the map. The compass on her phone was going all weird and haywire. Just great. Thanks Dad. Thanks crazy grandma Rheinfeldt.

Betty got out of the car, slamming the door with unnecessary force, and took a few steps forward. It was empty before her and behind her. No real landmarks of any note. She sighed and walked a bit further on, trying to peer between the trees, before turning.

To the side of the road, there were these amazing wild roses growing like a waterfall over the hedgerow. Betty wasn't one for wasting time admiring flowers, but there was one white rose which really caught her eye. It really was... the loveliest thing. She wanted it. It would look beautiful on her desk. Maybe she could press it into some book. Might as well get something out of being lost in this godforsaken hole, right?

Betty was nothing if not organised. She took out her swiss army knife on her keychain, jumped and reached the rose she wanted, and then snipped it off with the nail scissors. Yes! Got it. A prize indeed.

Just as she did so, a black flash rushed by her, ruffling her hair, the dirt on the road, dead leaves into a mini whirlwind around her. She froze in shock, clutching the rose, but dropping her swiss army knife.

A girl in tight black leather pants and a lacy black top stood before her, standing like an impossible model on the runway of life, arms folded, frowning slightly. Everything about her was - wow.

"Now why did you have to go and do that, cupcake?" said the girl in a low, lazy drawl. "You're pretty cute, I'll give you that. But I'm in no mood to deal with a blonde bimbo right now."

"Hey, who are you calling a bimbo?" said Betty, offended out of her shock, "I'm the valedictorian at my school. I'm lost, looking for Silas University, do you -"

"Filthy humans, always taking what isn't theirs. You dimwits never learn," grumbled the girl, as if she hadn't heard.

"Uh, well, I'm sorry, but I didn't realize this was private property, I didn't -" Betty stepped back at the girl's expression.

The girl laughed unpleasantly. She took a few steps closer to Betty, slowly, menacingly. As she opened her mouth to bare her teeth in a dreadful smile, Betty saw two pointed fangs. Betty took another step back in horror.

"Run," said the girl languidly, as if she didn't care very much. "Now." She suddenly snarled.

Betty turned quickly, freaked out by the unexpected ferocity, wanting to get in her car and drive far far away. Her palms had become sweaty, clamped around the rose which she'd already forgotten about, clutched as though it were a lifeline.

But before her, on the other side, was a large black car with tinted windows. She hadn't heard it drive up, she hadn't heard a thing. How did it get there? What was going on? Something like a thick cloud of evil pushed out from the car like a magnetic force. It hit her in the face like a sudden gust of wind. Betty shook with a fear she had never experienced before. A feeling of utter nausea spread through her. Pains like severe pins and needles shot through her head and pierced through the place behind her eyes. She held her head, gasping, trying to cope with the unexpected agony.

The tinted window slowly rolled down. She couldn't see the face very clearly, her vision had blurred a little with the pain, but she could hear the voice coming out more clearly than she ever wanted to. The voice made the hairs on the back of her neck rise and shiver.

"Now, now, I hope you weren't planning on letting this _lovely_ creature get away," said the low, sensuous voice. "You will have your little fun, Mircalla, but love _must_ have its sacrifices. No sacrifice without blood."

It was an older woman's voice, rich and dark, that spoke of style and timeless elegance and yet some sense of rotting, decadent pleasure. The voice made Betty quake in her boots. She held her stomach as the sickening feeling inside grew stronger. Her mouth opened and closed, no words, no sound came out.

"William, my sweet William, since our darling Mircalla seems loath to touch the new pet, won't you bring her here to Mother?"

"Yes Mother," said an obedient voice with just a hint of smug victory. Emerging from the driver's side of the car came a dark-haired young man, beautiful and pale in the light. He was slight and athletic, with a hidden strength, the kind of guy Betty might have looked twice at, if she wasn't afraid for her life.

"You never learn, do you Kitty? Just gotta push it that much further," he smirked at the girl in black, who lazily raised a middle finger.

Betty was frozen in fear as the young man grabbed her with unnecessary roughness, laughing with an ugly joy, and pushed her towards the dark passenger side of the vehicle, kicking up the dust in the road. Betty coughed.

A pale, aristocratic hand emerged and with a slow, deliberate finger, trailed down Betty's jawline, down her neck, and down her breast.

"Mmm, a fine little creature. I do like a nice willowy blonde."

"No -" whimpered Betty, finding her voice, struggling in William's arms.

"Shh, my little poppet, no need for fretting," drawled the woman, pretending to pout, "Or I'll think you don't like me. And here I just wanted to give you a little gift."

Betty shivered in horror as the lone, slender finger came out of the window again. Attached to it was some kind of metal implement that had been shaped like a curved rose thorn, something out of an earlier age. Tapped against the side of the car, it rang hollow and metallic. The thorn scraped against Betty's skin lightly until without warning, it pierced through her chest. Betty screamed in pain and the young man held her still with a grip like iron.

The rose thorn finger withdrew, leaving blood drops on her chest, and Betty, shaking uncontrollably, saw a pale, delicately pointed chin and the reddest lips she had ever seen half come out of the shadow of the car. A rosy pink tongue licked the tip of the rose thorn finger until droplets of blood stained the tongue tip a deep red.

"Delicious," smiled the red lips, laughing lightly. "She will do nicely."

The elegant fingers flicked a sign and William brought out a long, evil looking needle, piercing it into Betty's pulsing vein at her neck.

"Ahh -" Betty cried, as her body slowly became limp. She couldn't move, she couldn't speak, but her mind was going a million miles an hour.

"Oh I _do_ love those little sighs they make," said the amused voice.

"Not that I care, but are you really going to hold her in some pen until the Summoning?" said the girl indifferently. She blew on her nails and buffed them on the side of her leather pants. "Feed her gruel by your own lily white hands? For an entire semester? Seems like a lot of work to me but whatever floats your boat, Mother. Don't want to mess with tradition, right?"

"Oh my dear, one would think you've been living in a coffin for seventy years," the voice laughed like the ringing of happy bells.

"Technology has advanced since your last little - _attempts_ at insubordination," the woman's voice answered, positively dripping with evil. "You won't need some elaborate breakout plan. I'm going to let this _sweet_ little babe of the woods go."

"Let her go? You are?" asked the girl in sudden surprise, taking a step forward. She stopped, realizing she seemed too eager.

"Oh yes, why keep such a pretty songbird locked up in a cage when she will come to me, at the time of the bells," the voice laughed a silvery laugh, "I can hear all her lovely cries of fear out in the wild. She will come when I call. I like it when the wild ones obey me." The words ended in the hint of a vicious snarl.

"Mother -" started the girl in black, taking another step closer.

"But of course, my darling daughter, you must answer the call too. We must follow the letter of the law, musn't we? If we don't have the law, what do we have? This rebel without a clause act you've adopted is tiresome and tedious. One would think all your years in Paris would have taught you that." The voice laughed a metallic laugh that was light and melodic but gave the feel of being dangerously off-key.

Betty, unable to feel her body, held up by the dark-haired young man, could feel her eyes dropping slow tears. Why did her dad send her here? Why? She had never felt so alone, so helpless, so scared.

"Regretfully, it is no longer the 19th century and I have precious rings enough. To think I wasted all that time like a common thief chasing after baubles. Well we all make mistakes, don't we, when it comes to our pets? _Hmm_?" The finger was caressing her face again and Betty felt like cringing, but she couldn't move.

"As much as I positively _adore_ watching you steal true love's kiss from unsuspecting maidens, my lovely Mircalla - and you are so very good at it, just as I raised you to be - I think this time... I should like her memories, don't you think? She looks the type to love a good book. Her mind and her memories will be something to salivate over." The voice gave a low laugh as Betty's eyes widened. She clicked in false pity. "Oh no _no_ , my little pet, you are fearful, come sit by me and I shall comfort you."

William opened the door, the air of evil burst out with a terrible intensity. Her body was weak but she struggled as much as she was able, which was hardly anything at all. His strength was far greater, and he pushed her into the car, into darkness.

* * *

 

"Have you guys noticed anything weird lately?" asked Perry. Everyone looked at her oddly.

"Is the sky blue? Is the Alchemy Club full of weirdo little creepers?" said Danny. "Which out of the million and one weird things happening right now are you talking about? This is Silas!"

"Well I just thought it was odd that there are all these complicated preparations for Jubilee, the bell people have been practicing non stop every morning for goodness knows how long, well, except for the last few days, and we keep getting called to town hall meetings and fire drills and our movements in and out of campus are heavily restricted -"

"Yes, and?"

"And no one actually seems to know what Jubilee is. I mean, what are we celebrating?"

"Maybe it's to celebrate the founding of the university? Weird, everyone's been too distracted to ask, we just assumed. But you're right, why hide that?"

"Then again if there is something weird about the Jubilee, then that would mean the Dean has something to do with it, since it's pretty much been her baby for the past semester," Perry babbled, thinking out loud, "and I can't imagine a university administrative official like her being involved in any nefarious evil pla- waaait a minute -"

They all looked at each other.

"Perr, you're a genius!" said LaFontaine, giving her a sudden kiss on the cheek. Perry, surprised, smiled at her shyly.

"JP! Are you there?" Perry's smile drooped.

"Greetings everyone!"

"We have a possible lead. We need to find out more about the Jubilee and cross-reference it to whatever keywords that seem significant. Karnstein, Carmilla, Mircalla... hells, even bells!"

"Sounds like an excellent afternoon project for me. I'm on it!"

JP was LaFontaine's new friend that she'd met in the library. He was a kind of spirit who had been stuck in the library catalogue years ago, and now that Laf had put him on a USB stick he was so happy to finally be able to travel around the internet and "see the world" as he put it, he was willing to dig in and do all the tedious research work they needed from the library without putting all their lives in danger.

As a result, Laf had been spending a lot of time with JP, and frankly, Perry wasn't sure how she felt about that. He was handy, sure, and friendly too, which was a plus for anything coming from the library... and always there. That was the kicker. It was like she didn't really have Sus - LaFontaine as her best friend anymore. She didn't know what they had. Everything had changed so quickly, and for the weird.

"You know what's super weird, hotties?" said Kirsch, slowly, as though thinking was hurting his brain.

He'd been hanging around them a lot ever since Betty had partially woken up. He was still very much engaged in Zeta life with his bros, especially his best friend Will who they'd met briefly giving a pre med student a wedgie before running off with his blood bank medical cooler in typical Zeta style prank mode. But like a large puppy dog Kirsch often tagged along with them hoping to find out something to help SJ. He was nothing if not dedicated, in the densest way possible. He infuriated Danny constantly, who was already feeling pretty guilty and helpless that she hadn't recognized the symptoms to Elsie's change in behavior before they broke up, and she had little patience for his stupid, sexist remarks.

Though Danny thought he was an annoying pig, he had an unfortunate habit of asking them the right dumb questions at the right moments and always being there to lend a hand. The two of them had actually made a good, but unfriendly, team.

"Well, it's about the bells, those crazy bells. Do any of you hotties think it's weird that Sleeping Betty woke up as soon as the bells weren't ringing? And SJ did too, but I wasn't there," he said sadly, "but she wrote me a note." And he showed them an illegibly scrawled note that said something like "I luv my boo. Help mee."

"Yes but Laura didn't wake up," Perry pointed out.

"Yeah. Well, maybe it's nothing, but we should check it out anyway. Leave no weird unturned. I mean if the students complained to the Dean Almighty about the incessant bell ringing and they make it stop I don't think anyone would be too upset," said LaFontaine.

"You really think the student council is ever going to complain about anything to the _Dean_?" said Danny incredulously. "The university doesn't even want to acknowledge there's a freaking epidemic of girls falling into this weird coma thing. If we want the bells stopped, we'd have to storm the bell tower ourselves, kidnap the bell ringers and I don't know, throw them off the bell tower till they get the message? Anything we want done, we've gotta do it ourselves."

"Whoa, intense, Anger Issues hottie. Throw them from the bell tower? Unbell-ievable. Ow!" Danny punched Kirsch on the shoulder.

"Laura isn't babbling like the rest of them either. I mean, it's like she's just happily sleeping away while all this is going on. We need her here, with her, you know, investigative reporter skills. Why doesn't she wake up? It's been two and a half days she's been asleep. I just wish Laura was here. Why can't things be normal for a change?" Perry threw her beloved Floor Don handbook petulantly aside.

"I wish little nerd hottie was here too," said Kirsch sympathetically, patting Perry's shoulder. "I miss seeing her walk in front of me to class. Ow! Dude!" Danny punched him in the shoulder furiously again.

"Maybe our intrepid girl reporter is, you know, in the middle of an 'intimate' in-depth investigation and can't spare the time to wake up right now," said Laf, crooking two rabbit ears with their fingers.

"What do you mean?" asked Danny, incensed.

"What do you think I meant, I mean I used air quotes, I think that's pretty obvious. She has a total crush on that vampire girl in her dream."

"Why would Laura have a crush on someone who _bit_ her?"

"I don't know, why would anyone have a crush on someone with seduction eyes? Bites me! Geddit? Bites. Beats me. Oh never mind."

Danny glared at LaFontaine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A respite from the dark intensity of Victorian Carmilla and Oblivious 'Elle', sitting in a tree.
> 
> Thanks for reading, and feel free to let me know how you think the story is going. (I welcome criticism also). :)


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a rollercoaster ride  
> Of all the trouble kept her inside...
> 
> Very slightly fluffy... before it all goes to hell.

Three unexpected things happened in the night.

The first was a dream. Soft whispers had infiltrated Laura's sleep, until the whispers became the rush of a stream. Then out of the river of whispers, a voice she did not know, at once sweet and tender, yet altogether terrifying, called to her, saying

_"Your mother warns you to beware of the assassin."_

It seemed to Laura that moonlight had flooded the room, and she woke, rubbing her bleary eyes. She blinked to see Carmilla standing before her, at the foot of the bed, in her white nightgown, expressionless. But from her neck down, she was bathed in one great stain of blood. As Laura screamed awake at the terrible sight, she seemed to see Carmilla, looking confused and anguished, lift her bloodied arm up for help.

She awoke to blackness, but lips were seeking hers for comforting, and Carmilla's voice, very much not dead, was then soothing in her ear. Her heart beat fast as she felt Carmilla's arms around her, pale as they always had been, not bloodstained, and she held her body tightly to her, not wanting to let go.

"What is it?" whispered Carmilla, nuzzling in the dark, gently caressing her.

"Nothing. It was nothing. A dream," murmured Laura, holding her close, breathing her in.

"Just a dream then," said Carmilla, with a low chuckle, "and dreams aren't real. You're safe here." Laura stiffened at the thought of this. It was all too confusing. Dreams might not be real but her body felt so different now. _She_ felt so different. She sighed. Carmilla smoothed down her hair, thinking she was frightened. How loving and strange and intense she always was.

"It seemed so real," said Laura, her heart beating fast, "I dreamt of some voice saying to me 'Your mother warns you to beware of the assassin' and then I saw you, covered in blood from the neck down. Oh, it was so horrible to see you like that! And I couldn't do anything to help." She squeezed tighter.

Carmilla lay still, her hand absentmindedly tangled in Laura's hair.

"Carmilla?" whispered Laura. Carmilla seemed to come back to the present.

"It's over," she soothed, cradling her head close. "You're here. I'm here. You haven't been spirited away, and dawn will soon be here." She laughed delightedly, as though it was Christmas. Carmilla pressed in closer, tangling their legs together. They lay there, peacefully for a moment.

"I wish I'd known you as a child," whispered Laura suddenly. "I wish we'd known each other then." She tentatively touched Carmilla's fingers, feeling them with her fingers, until their fingers met and knitted together in a warm bond.

"So I could fight those horrid children who made your life a misery?" smiled Carmilla, tickling Laura's nose with hers. Laura laughed quietly.

"No, I don't need you to fight for me, I can do that myself."

"Mmm, I don't doubt it, I've seen your wildcat side before," laughed Carmilla softly, placing a breathy kiss on Laura's head.

"No, it just would have been nice. To have someone. To have a friend with me, just to hold onto. Um, maybe not exactly like this," as Carmilla's legs tightened, "But maybe things wouldn't have been so terrible then."

Laura could feel Carmilla looking at her thoughtfully in the dim light.

"You don't let go easily, do you?" asked Carmilla cryptically. "I like that about you, you stubborn - little - fool. You hold on tight. No matter what happens. To roses at least," she smiled, kissing Laura's hand like a gentlewoman in love.

"Hopefully to someone you might - like... ?" She murmured, kissing her wrist with a gentle, warm open mouth.

"And... maybe also to grudges." She teased, kissing Laura's fingertips, before licking the tip of her index finger into her mouth. Oh. God.

"Are you mocking me while I'm pouring my heart out to you?" demanded Laura indignantly, but shivering from the kisses. "After I just woke up from a horrible nightmare?"

"Never - never - never. Just think about this, Elle," she kissed Laura lightly on the forehead, "and this," a kiss on her nose, "and this," she kissed her deeply, distracting her from her dreams.

"Are you trying to distract me?" said Laura in a low, hoarse voice. In the dark, her hand smoothed across Carmilla's shoulders and chest, reaching up to cup her face, trying to remember the feel of Carmilla's body, as though she was blind.

"Always... always - always," murmured Carmilla with a laugh, kissing her passionately, gently sucking her tongue into her mouth.

From smouldering embers, a fire flickered back to life deep inside her. That was the second unexpected thing that night. Carmilla was making her forget, forget her own name, forget the questions that needed answers, forget such a lot of things. But this time Laura would get her revenge, before they fell asleep in each others' arms again, just before the dawn, exhausted.

****

The third thing was unexpected and yet she had been warned. No one could say she had not been warned. Feeling safe in each other's arms was not the same thing as being safe.

When Laura woke the next morning, she did not expect to find herself standing by the roadside, fully dressed, as though someone had used her as a doll and had placed her where they wanted to. She was getting really sick of the universe treating her like a puppet. Laura uttered an expletive.

She'd gone to sleep in Carmilla's arms finally, after that very eventful night, and looked forward to waking up in her arms the next morning. That was the way it was supposed to go. Instead, she was wide awake, and standing outside somewhere she didn't recognise. She was lost. Her mind ran around in circles, trying to figure out what she should do now.

She was still stuck in the dream, it looked more and more like she was stuck here forever. Worse, away from Carmilla's intense, magnetic personality, she could think with a bit more clarity and she was kicking herself for her idiocy. Laura Hollis, budding investigative journalist, had been going to do her utmost to investigate Carmilla and ask the tough questions. Carmilla had even offered to answer them.

There was still the mystery of that snarky vampire girl in black, a girl Carmilla would perhaps become in the future, in a time that seemed so far away in Laura's past. The black car, a menacing upgrade to the black couch and four, clearly, but that sense of palpitating evil had not changed. What was that thing inside it? All these questions that had never been answered. Instead she'd fallen asleep at the crucial moment after a crazy wonderful night spent in the arms of her supposed target. This was pathetic. Professor Cochrane would side-eye her so hard for this, if not rip her to shreds for behaviour unworthy of a journalist.

The hardest part though, that Laura found hard to admit to herself, was the feeling of loss and longing that filled her entire body, now that she stood here in the middle of god knew where, completely alone. She didn't understand it. She stood there in that isolated place, feeling her face, her skin, her body, clenching and unclenching her fists as though they were alien hands and she was trying them out for the first time. She was different. She had changed now, because Carmilla had touched her. Somehow she was more anchored to the earth, she was more human, more flesh and blood and bone now than she had been yesterday. She had hunger and thirst, not as a child for ordinary food and drink, but for something else stranger and more wanting. Every nerve, every sense in her seemed to crave something. Carmilla.

Was she in love? Could she be in love so quickly, so completely? No. It was impossible. No. No. Impossible, she told herself, before she realized she was actually pacing along the road back and forth, creating mini dust storms in her wonderings as her skirt dragged the ground. She would never be able to think of skirts the same way again, without thinking of Carmilla's hands sliding up under them and then kissing her ferociously. Ladders were no longer ladders, books and beds and innocent flowers were nothing like they had been, because Carmilla had touched them.

"Oh god, I'm in love with Carmilla," she said out loud, shocking herself into silence. She blushed crimson at how loud her voice echoed.

In the quiet, the dust settled. She heard only her own breathing.

But then the vibrations started. She heard the rumbling, seemingly from a distance. The very road seemed to start quaking in fear as the sound got ever closer.

"Oh no," said Laura, her mouth dry.

A black coach and four creaked into view. Before it, two masked riders on massive black steeds rode in advance. Two masked guards behind it fanned out on the road. And the coach crept inexorably closer, so slowly, and yet in an instant it was there before her. Nowhere to run. Not any more. _Carmilla!_  Laura screamed for help in her head.

Inexplicably, the bells in some location Laura couldn't place started ringing loudly, too loudly, jangling their ceaseless cacophony in her head. She closed her eyes, but when she opened them again nothing had changed. There was no hope of waking up anymore.

The horsemen surrounded her, their black cloaks and masks making them menacing figures out of some gothic horror story, something that should have been so far removed from reality as to be laughable but had somehow ended up being entirely her life now. The black coach had halted to a stop in front of Laura, the horses snorting and rearing dangerously.

The window shade was pulled away, and something like a black oil slick evil slithered out, flooding and pooling around Laura's shivering frame and threatening to pull her insides out through her silent screaming mouth and nostrils and through her ears and eyeballs and laugh mockingly while doing it. This - this was pure evil. She was unable to utter a word, frozen in terror.

A hand reached out slowly, languidly, unafraid of the passage of time, fully aware of its own power.

"Oh my poor darling dear, are you lost?" purred a low, sickeningly luxurious voice. A cold sweat broke out on Laura's forehead and the back of her neck, and the sudden gust of a chilly breeze made her shake. She wanted to be sick, the voice made her sick, it made everything around her sick with dread.

The long, slender finger slid out to touch Laura's collarbone - and then suddenly hissed sharply.

"She has been marked," said the voice, snarling. "Bring her to me." A hessian bag was suddenly pulled over her head from behind and Laura saw only blackness.

* * *

 

Laura awoke in darkness, hearing just the sounds of horses' hooves steadily clopping along the road, every now and again there was the crack of the whip as the coachman cursed the horses onwards. She was inside the coach, which swayed this way and that as the horses rode on.

She lay still, pretending to still be in a dead faint. No one touched her, though she could sense the presence of two people in the coach with her. She could feel nothing but the rough bag over her head, but through that she could see no light, the interior of the coach was as black as night. And all around that pervasive evil slid against her, threatening to seep into her very pores. She couldn't give into fear now, she couldn't. She was a Lois Lane, she was a Veronica Mars, she was a Laura Hollis and she wouldn't be put down. _Carmilla_ , she pleaded in her head.

The bells in the distance got louder and louder, but no amount of closing her eyes and opening did anything at all. She was definitely not waking up. But wait. The bells. Carmilla had murmured to her, something about Silas Field, where the bell tower was. She would be there, looking for Laura, she had to be. But she'd also warned Laura to take care and now Laura was in the worst possible situation she could be, in the hands of the very people Carmilla had wanted to avoid. _Good going Hollis_ , Laura thought furiously at herself. A single, frightened tear slid down her cheek, but that was all she would allow.

The thought of Carmilla warmed her, gave her hope. No matter how strong this evil woman was, and her minions, Carmilla was a force to be reckoned with, strong, mysterious. With the both of them together, back to back, against the world, Laura had faith that they could get through this. Carmilla had to be there, at the end, searching desperately for her. Was it too childish and too romantic to think of Carmilla on her horse, riding up and pulling Laura away, fleeing to safety?

The bells were starting to sound like a flock of angry crows by now, raucous and ready to tear anyone apart, when the coach finally halted.

The doors to the coach opened, and one figure got out, perhaps to assist its evil mistress. The coach swayed as steps were pulled down, and a light entered. Through the hessian cloth Laura could see backs to her, no one before her on the other side. Taking an impulsive, foolhardy chance, she whipped the bag off her head and dashed out the coach door on the other side.

She was a little hampered by her skirts, but she ran, she ran till her breath was ragged, across the grounds of what looked to be an old churchyard, dotted about with decaying gravestones. She expected to hear yelling and shouting from behind her, as she ran so desperately, but most frighteningly, she only heard laughter, mocking and careless.

"Oh let the dear little fox run out of her hole," laughed the woman's voice smoothly and easily, "she'll get her exercise and will be all the better for hunting."

No matter how fast she tried to run, some invisible force held her back, just like those horrible nightmares she'd always had as a kid where total weakness would take over her just when she needed to struggle and fight for her life. She ran and ran but she couldn't get very far, no matter what she did, and in the meantime, unhurried footsteps came after her, calling for her in an unconcerned, sing-song voice.

"Oh little lost la-aamb," giggled a voice. "Come out, come out to play."

Pushing against the force that held her back, Laura broke free, step by unsteady step, as though her feet were weighed down with anvils, to the edge of the churchyard. Behind her was the stony belltower, with its bells deafening her, and confusing everything around her. It was almost unbearable.

Suddenly - thankfully - Laura's heart almost sobbed and burst with relief at the sight and sound of Carmilla, galloping madly towards her on her horse. All in black, she looked the very picture of a hero. She halted abruptly, dismounting, and with an engaging smile, rushed quickly towards Laura, not saying a word.

"Oh where are you-u?" sang a voice behind her, before bursting into inane laughter.

Laura's heart dropped to the pit of her stomach as she saw the smile fade from Carmilla's pale face, a look of utter horror and repulsion replacing it, as her eyes dulled and emptied itself of all expression.

Laura's last memory was of Carmilla, frozen before her, not moving, not speaking, not saving, doing nothing at all, as many hands grabbed and groped her from behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story moves on relentlessly, much like an evil couch and four.
> 
> Have I lost readers with how convoluted this story has got? I hadn't planned on this story being quite so long so thanks again for sticking with it guys. :)
> 
> I may re-edit this chapter later, it was written in a bit of a rush, but here it is!
> 
> Always happy to hear what you guys think, shoot me a comment and I'll be yours for-evah.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hold onto your hats, creampuffs, it's a bumpy ride!
> 
> Showdown...
> 
> I think this verse is fitting:
> 
> Hear the loud alarum bells,  
> Brazen bells!  
> What a tale of terror, now, their turbulency tells!  
> In the startled ear of night  
> How they scream out their affright!  
> Too much horrified to speak,  
> They can only shriek, shriek,  
> Out of tune,  
> In a clamorous appealing to the mercy of the fire,  
> In a mad expostulation with the deaf and frantic fire,  
> Leaping higher, higher, higher,  
> With a desperate desire,  
> And a resolute endeavor  
> Now—now to sit or never,  
> By the side of the pale-faced moon.  
> Oh, the bells, bells, bells!  
> What a tale their terror tells  
> Of Despair!

Once again, the dirty hessian bag was over her head. It smelled of dust and soot and rot, making it hard to breathe. Was it simply to make her more afraid or actually to hide where they were taking her? All she could assume was she was at the bell tower at Silas Field. But Laura didn't need eyes to fight back.

Laura had heard sharp hissing as many hands grabbed and pulled at her, dragging her, but they all eventually released her as she struggled and kicked. She fought, she scratched. They were going to wish they'd tied her up when they had the chance. Damsel in distress be damned. She heard someone howl in agony as she blindly used one of her krav maga moves, thrashing in midair. She could feel those surrounding her backing away, circling her.

"Cease this absurd dance with this child and take her," drawled the bored voice of the dark mistress.

Then someone else caught her arms together, lifted her, so deftly, so easily, so light, as though she was a snowy dandelion pod floating on the wind. They were arms that she knew. She knew them intimately, she knew how they made her feel. Hands that had changed her, that had pulled her out of herself, turning her into someone else she wanted to be. Hands that even now spoke of a gentle caress, even as they stopped her from lashing out blindly. She could smell the gentle, sweet smell of roses, _her_ scent, that spoke of tender times in a cottage garden, away from all this. Tears suddenly stung her eyes, within the hessian mask, and she stopped struggling with the shock of it, her body limp. No.

_Betrayal._

Could it really be true? Had everything been a lie?

She was carried, down what sounded like stone stairs. She could hear the slow drip of moisture somewhere, the smell of damp. And she could feel, without wanting to, a thumb stroke her skin slowly, absentmindedly, almost comfortingly. It was not a thing she could pin her hopes on. She was ashamed to feel almost safe in those arms.

"Release her," commanded the deep, rich voice of the mysterious woman. She would never forget the sound of that voice.

Someone dragged the bag off her head finally, none too gently, her hair floating wildly in static disarray, wanting to escape as much as she did. There was a titter of amusement from behind her. She blew it out of her eyes and blinked to see Carmilla standing in front of her, looking serious, but with the hint of an evil sneer on her face. She seemed ever so slightly disgusted by what she saw in front of her. No. No, it couldn't be true.

"Carmilla," said Laura, in a hollow voice, despite herself.

The sound rang in the darkening room of stone. Smeared around the walls were dark red stains - oh god, was it - it had to be blood. The place smelled like death. Wooden and iron beams, chain links - some kind of contraption. Only one door leading up, and that was behind her. Surrounding the place were grey and black hooded figures, like so many silent acolytes serving a queen. She felt sick and so afraid. She hoped the trail of tears on her face wasn't too obvious.

"Last time I heard that you were screaming my name, my little dove," Carmilla drawled with a nasty leer.

Laura was in complete shock. No. This couldn't be happening.

Laura wanted to look into her eyes, wanted to see for herself if there was something else lying behind it. Maybe this was all some elaborate trick. Maybe it wasn't betrayal. She had to know. But she couldn't bring herself to do it, she just couldn't. She looked down at the dirty, dusty floor, using all her willpower to stop herself from making a fool of herself. Stop herself from crying over a girl who -

"Oh? _Carmilla_ , is it now?" laughed the amused voice of the strange woman. "How absolutely _wonderful_."

Laura looked up to see a tall figure of decaying beauty, yet still formidable, walk slowly out of the shadows. It was so hard to determine what she looked like clearly, for the sticky, clingy cloud of evil floating around her forced Laura to look away in utter horror.

This then, was Carmilla's Mother, who she'd called the Queen of the Faeries. Exceedingly tall, blonde and elegant, but with a face always under dark and forbidding shadow, with the fear of the unknown only serving to intensify the unbearable evil flowing from her.

The dark Queen chuckled lightly, deep in her throat.

"Oh my darling Mircalla, I can hardly keep up with all your lies. Truly you amuse me so."

Laura looked up in shock. Mircalla? As in Countess Mircalla, the so-called monster of Karnstein Hall, who they'd all thought was some kind of ghost? But then, why had Carmilla called herself a monster who didn't deserve to live?

"Oh yes, my little - dove. You look as though you've had quite a _shock_. Oh dear. Did you not know how my darling daughter lies? Everything she says is a lie."

The figure sauntered towards Carmilla, who quickly took a few steps backwards, away from Laura, to meet her. Somehow, the mysterious woman's face stayed partially in shadow, no matter where she walked, and it hurt Laura's eyes to stare too long into that face. The woman laid a slender hand on Carmilla's shoulder, the red talons of her nails glinting in the light, gripping as Carmilla's shoulder raised a little, whether in pain or to give her Mother support, Laura couldn't tell.

"My dear daughter is quite the trickster. Left to her own devices she might change her name and become someone else entirely and then simply _flutter_ off into the world like a pretty little butterfly and leave her poor _dear_ family to miss her."

The woman waved her hand elegantly into the air, fluttering her delicate long fingers, as Laura stared in horrified fascination at the red talons, sharp and claw-like. She smiled, baring her pointed teeth horribly, enjoying the sound of her own voice and her own speeches.

Still, Carmilla said nothing, made no movement.

"Girls are caterpillars while they live in the world, don't you know, to be finally butterflies when the summer comes; but in the meantime there are grubs and larvae, don't you see--each with their peculiar propensities, necessities and structure. The rules are so _very_ important. We love the letter of the law, don't we sweetheart?"

The long fingers gripped Carmilla's shoulder tighter, but she showed no reaction, save to lift her shoulder slightly higher.

The dark Queen really loved the sound of her own voice. No one else made a sound.

"Carmilla," pleaded Laura, as if she had no real hope. "Carmilla, please!"

But Carmilla showed no sign she'd heard.

"Silence!" said the Queen sternly, before breaking out in a sudden smile.

"Oh I do love my Mircalla's wild heart, but I had to make it a little _teeny_ tiny rule for my darling daughter. Names are so very important to the nobility you see. Play with her name, she might, but without the omission or addition of a single letter. I insisted on that. Otherwise, who would we know who she belongs to?"

The elegant lady laughed delightfully, as sickeningly as a sweet confection left to decay. She squeezed Carmilla's shoulder in a false display of affection.

 _I named him after myself_ , Carmilla had laughed, when Laura had asked about her horse. Of course. Calm Liar, a ridiculous anagram name that was both entirely true and was a stupid, secret clue to one of the many conditions she couldn't talk about, which had been placed upon her by this rotting Queen with her evil rotting heart, spread right out in the open for anyone to know. Laura didn't know whether to laugh or cry at how silly and stupid it was, yet it was something of a hopeless, helpless shout in the dark as well.

Carmilla was clever. She was a liar, an expert liar, who laid traps for everyone. What other clues had she left, what other traps? It seemed Laura had fallen into the biggest trap yet.

_Betrayal._

"Dearest, your little heart is _wounded_ ," said the evil woman to Laura, pouting a little. "Think her not cruel because she obeys the irresistible law of her strength and weakness. Do you fear you never _knew_ my dearest daughter? Is that the fear in your eyes? Why then, let me introduce you."

The tall, elegant lady laid her hand with tenderness on Carmilla's head, which bowed down heavily as if in benediction.

"May I present my _darling_ daughter, Mircalla, Countess Karnstein, of Karnstein Hall. She is famed throughout these lands you know. You've heard of the mythical _monster_ of Karnstein Hall, I am sure your governess and your nurse and half the villagers have warned you. A marvelous _vampire_ of renown, my own child, who I raised from the jaws of death itself. Oh, you didn't _know_?"

For the first time, Carmilla looked up with her eyes, locking onto Laura's. Her expression was unreadable but Laura saw her jaw clench and unclench as though she was under great stress. Laura stared back like a fool and was left wondering what she should be feeling. Carmilla quickly flicked her eyes away carelessly. If she could just see some special sign from Carmilla that she had not tricked her. Something. But Carmilla's name died in Laura's throat.

The dark Queen went on with her absurd, tiresome speech, and all the hooded idiots stood around and listened rapturously. From Carmilla, she could sense no emotion at all. Not anymore.

"A mother is so _proud_ , I need ask nothing more than a fine reputation for my daughter... and her many loves," laughed the woman delightedly. "So many young girls, it is quite a _marvel_. Oh - did you think you were _special_ , my pet? But surely - have you not heard that village rhyme that they bandy about the taverns? Indeed, you must have, oh how does it run?

 

_O I forbid you, maidens all,_

_That wear gold in your hair,_

_To come or go by Karnstein Hall,_

_For young Mircalla is there._

 

_There's none that goes by Karnstein Hall_

_But they leave her a gift or wish,_

_Either their rings, or memories all,_

_Or else their true love's kiss._ "

 

So there it was. Carmilla was a monster after all.

Carmilla's Mother laughed loudly then, and the black cloaked acolytes standing around her started laughing horribly, like so many hyenas. Laura shivered at the sound. She looked at the floor, anywhere other than Carmilla.

That was the betrayal.

Not that Carmilla was a monster, but that she, Laura, was not and had never been special. Not to anyone. Not even to a monster. She was now just one of many girls who had been used and discarded. She'd fallen for the oldest trick in the book. And here, she'd been hoping, half believing in Carmilla's innocence. But it was no use. Inside, Laura's entire being was already forming tangled knots of an immense hurt that couldn't be soothed.

"Oh but where are my _manners_? And what is _your_ name, my darling dove?"

The Queen smiled brightly with her ferocious teeth on display, a rod of iron behind her velvet voice.

"Mother -" started Carmilla suddenly, taking a half step forward, before the back hand of her Mother instantly and efficiently whipped across her jaw without so much as her losing a hair out of place.

Laura's mouth dropped in shock and fear and anxiety for someone she couldn't afford to care about anymore. Even someone who had hurt her so much didn't deserve this woman's evil.

"You dare defy me?" the woman almost spat through her clenched teeth, showing passion for a split second. "Do not presume to interrupt - while I am talking to our _delightful_ guest." The woman resumed her honeyed words and her imitation of a sunshine smile.

Carmilla was working her jaw tentatively, as a small trail of blood dropped from the corner of her lips. She looked as though it meant nothing, as though it was a common occurrence that she had ceased to care anymore.

"I beg pardon Mother," she said in a dull monotone, but through gritted teeth, "you know I adore your - many speeches, and I do full honour to them. " Laura could not even tell anymore if Carmilla was being sarcastic or serious.

"But it is not worth your time to know the name of this - creature."

She gestured carelessly at Laura with a hint of disgust, turning away from her, so she couldn't see her face.

"She is nothing. A mere bagatelle to pass the time. She is worthless. She is nothing."

Laura clenched her jaw, determined not to break down. She wouldn't give them the satisfaction. Damn Carmilla. Why did she do this? Why? Laura hurt in so many ways she wasn't sure if she could take anymore, but she was going to damn well try.

"Ohho," laughed her Mother, "She is nothing, indeed, a _filthy_ human. As they all are. But you, my glittering girl, are a diamond. And stone _cannot_ love flesh. You see your Family understands you. You would do well to listen."

The woman paused, before pushing Carmilla towards Laura, seemingly without force, and yet Carmilla appeared before her in no time at all.

"Yet," said the dark Queen in ominous tones, "You did not bring your _worthless_ little pet to me when Mother asked you to, my sweet Mircalla. So close to Jubilee and you chose to defy me yet again. Why was that? Do you think I enjoy playing steeplechase with my runaway daughter up hill and down dale for all the countryside to laugh at? Do you make mock of me?"

Carmilla was close enough now to reach. How stupid to be thinking of how easy it would be to pull Carmilla into her arms. _Stupid, stupid._ There was nothing left of the Carmilla she knew and had fallen in love with, so short a time ago. It was all trickery. Carmilla's face gave nothing away, if there was anything but neutrality, it was disgust. Laura was just a filthy human after all.

"Mother," said Carmilla evenly, staring Laura in the eye with an unreadable expression. "Let me explain. It was a gift - to you. I had to run from you, to make her trust me. I have made her lo - made her love me." Carmilla's voice was low.

Laura felt the sound of her heart breaking could be heard from miles away. If she thought too much about it, she would break down. She would never let Carmilla see that anything she did affected her. A cold anger started up inside her, where there once was fire. She felt dirty, like she could never be clean again. To have had that one beautiful night, to think you were loved, and then to be mocked by these menacing strangers - only anger could drive that feeling out.

"Carmilla," said Laura in disgust, hardly knowing what she was saying, only wanting to hurt as she'd been hurt, "you said wanted to run away with me. I hope you run away and I never have to see you again." Laura's lip curled and she hissed out her heartbreak.

"Good riddance, to someone who would have been witless enough to become a monster to others had she lived. Let her die a monster and have an end to it." Laura swallowed a lump in her throat.

"Go away, Carmilla. Go run and hide. We’re done."

There were loud hoots and shrieking giggles from the crowd of cloaked figures. They all ignored her last, confusing words, but Carmilla, for the first time, showed some emotion on her face. She looked at Laura strangely, her face pale. Her mouth opened up to speak, but no words came out.

By then the dark Queen's mocking laugh rose high above the others.

"Oh, oh, that is _precious_. Run away together? To die as lovers may? How touching and _romantic_. Am I to understand that you have taken her _true love's kiss_?" she tittered.

"Yes." Carmilla's voice was dull, bored.

"After _all_ these years you finally exert yourself, daughter, to bring me a prize worth keeping? You have taken her maidenhead I trust?" The last words were a growl of dangerous excitement. The contrast between that and the honeyed words was all the more frightening.

"Yes," said Carmilla slowly. She stepped closer to Laura, who shrank back, trying hard not to let the tears spill over. How dare she. How dare Carmilla do this to her. Carmilla could go to hell and Laura would help her get there if it was the last thing she did.

"And she _begged_ for it," Carmilla drawled suddenly, with an angry, ugly smile, amidst the shrieking laughter. Then, bending towards Laura, she murmured in her ear something unexpected, that only Laura could hear.

"Don't tell her your name."

Carmilla kissed Laura, mockingly, and furious, out of pure instinct, Laura raised her hand and slapped her hard. The sound of the slap rang off the stone walls, as the hoots and hilarity got louder. But the hooded figures drew closer, to help Carmilla subdue her.

"Don't you dare speak to me again," Laura spat out ferociously, through clenched teeth. She pushed angrily against Carmilla's torso, but she was immoveable. Carmilla easily grabbed her wrists with a vicelike grip, stopping her. Suddenly two vampires were right next to them, and Laura kicked one of them in the shins.

"Oh no, my little wildcat." Holding Laura's wrists down, Carmilla worked her jaw back and forth against the pain. Blood from her first wound had slid down the pale skin of her jaw, making her look more of the vampire than ever before. But Laura was now too purely angry and hurt to be scared, even surrounded by all these hateful, evil, horrible people. Carmilla was the worst of them. To make fun of her, to make fun of their time together, however fake it had been from Carmilla's side, just to get out of trouble with her Mother. It was unforgiveable. She would never forgive her.

"Mother, I ask a boon," Carmilla drawled lazily, hardly breaking a sweat against a struggling Laura.

"Speak, daughter."

"Since I have spent many days with this one, befriending her, bedding her, all in honor of you, I have not fed. I am hungry. I ask leave to feed from her before you take her."

"And have you _mark_ her again? Mar her lovely skin? I think _not_ , child."

"It matters not if she is marked for the Jubilee. She will be worthless to me soon. But now her blood is up, she still has love for me - oh yes you do, little one - and it will be doubly potent. You need me in good health, I think, Mother, for the Summoning."

"Hmm, you speak truly and I am moved to look upon you favorably since you bring me _such_ a gift. At such a time too. Is such a thing to be _believed_ after all these years? I hope now you will see that everything I do, I do it for the best. But marking such a l _ovely_ creature for an _amusebouche_ , my dearest -"

But Carmilla did not wait for more speeches. She was impatient. In a split second, she held Laura firm in her arms and immediately leant down. Before Laura even had time to be shocked, Carmilla whispered in her ear.

"Goodbye, Elle."

Carmilla bit her suddenly and harshly on her pulse point and sucked in deeply.

Laura screamed more loudly than she ever had before, a piercing shriek of pure anguish, and horrifyingly, it merged with a gasp of something like pure sensual pleasure, spreading out through her neck from Carmilla's bite. _No._ Just as she felt her body slump limply, anchored against Carmilla's confusing lips, losing all consciousness, she whispered groggily,

"My name isn't Elle."

She felt rather than saw Carmilla's shock, but by then the bells were playing so loudly as to be deafening, ringing over and over the same alarms in her head. All that was left was darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh-oh, what's going on?
> 
> Enjoy speculating, and tell me what you think in the comments pleeease! :)
> 
> (Just a note that I may not be able to update for the next few days, due to deadlines).
> 
> Thanks for reading! So happy people are enjoying this story. :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will your faith in our non-heroic vampire be restored or not? Find out...
> 
> Kudos to those of you who guessed what happened to 'Elle'.

The worst thing in the world is to love someone you hate.

To hate someone you love.

And then to long for them, helplessly, knowing you may never see them again.

The bells had done their job this time, and so cruelly. The bells from Laura's world, the real world, had finally rung, rung desperately on and on in panicked alarm, and called her home.

"She's been lying like that for three days now, with that nasty looking bite on her neck," Perry said in a low voice to the others, looking concerned. "Worse than any spider bite. Worse than it was before. " She shook her head, frowning.

"This is bad. I know I said we needed Laura back - but not like this - this, this is way worse."

"Frosh has gone from lying there sleeping for three days to just lying there awake. Walking around like a zombie when she's not lying around like a zombie."

"And crying," added Perry. "Well not even really crying, just leaking tears silently."

"When we find her, I'm going to kill her," said Danny through gritted teeth, who had just come into the room. She'd been away the last few days, looking after Elsie and all the others, organizing a Summer Society led infirmary routine. She looked exhausted. "That - that -"

But Perry shook her head at Danny and she fell silent, her hands at her sides uselessly, clenching and unclenching her fists. Danny started pacing uncertainly this way and that, wanting action, wanting to do something.

"Laura," said Perry gently, trying again, squeezing her shoulder sympathetically, sitting on the bed, "talk to us, it might help. Please. We're all worried about you. Danny's here, see?"

But Laura was still, her back turned to them.

"Come on, frosh, what happened?" LaFontaine persisted, trying out a bit of tough love. Perry put her hand on Laf's arm but Laf shook it off impatiently. "I may have my aspie moments sometimes but I'm not trying to be a jerk, it's just any information she might have might really help the girls. It might help her. "

"Yes, but this might not be the time, Laf, I - maybe we should give Laura more time."

"You know how serious this is, Perr, after what we just found out. We might not have time." Laf raised their voice a bit louder. "Hollis. Come on, this was your thing in the first place. You're the ace reporter. We need you, Betty needs you. L! Can you hear us -"

_Elle._

Elle was a lie. Everything was a lie.

Laura suddenly turned towards them. Her mouth was open but no cry came out. Her face was full of twisted hurt, which was all the more heartwrenching because she was so clearly trying to hold back from showing any emotion at all. But she was not stone, she was flesh.

She sat up wearily, groggily, falling onto a surprised Perry as one might fall from a great height, killed by gravity. She couldn't help herself anymore. She cried, noiselessly at first, but then her body heaved and jerked as though the hurt was growing inside her and struggling to burst out of her very body like some alien creature. The crying became a rushing of waves, a release of all the anguish she'd been saving up and putting away for a rainy day.

LaFontaine reached out a hand at first, in shocked, mute apology, feeling ashamed, but Perry brushed it aside, frowning, and held onto Laura tightly as she wept and shook uncontrollably, rubbing her back comfortingly and soothing her as her mother had always done.

Everyone else stood in silence, in shock. They had never seen Laura, had never seen anyone cry like that before. With such heartbreaking grief, like something was broken inside her.

"Carmilla." Laura whispered through her tears.

They all exchanged worried, scared glances at this. Knowing what they knew, what JP had been able to find out, they saw the frightened looks reflected on each of their faces. As though with one thought, Danny and LaFontaine silently lay their arms around Laura and Perry. After a few minutes the door opened, and a tall body came, hesitated, and then hugged them all tightly. Danny didn't even shake Kirsch off this time. Laura needed all the hugs she could get.

_Carmilla._

* * *

 

Carmilla didn't wait for anyone to be surprised at the sudden, startling disappearance of Elle, or the girl who had called herself Elle. Even as Carmilla smiled a wry and twisted smile to herself, in a split second she'd already taken down six of Mother's worthless minions.

It was poetry if she did say so herself, everything had worked out with mathematical precision just according to her rapid calculations. A roundhouse kick of her sharp heeled riding boots took out two of them, who crashed into two others with painful speed. She threw sudden, vicious punches to the necks of another two and she'd just about pulled the hoods down of the two at the door, leaping over their heads into midair when she teleported out in a blinding flash, whistling to Liar as she did so -

Only to see the dark murder of crows, scratching and clawing, descend from on high, surrounding her in some black shadow swarm, impossible to escape. Liar reared then, unable to get closer to her. He screamed in a way she had never heard before, as the black cloud of talons and sharp beaks rushed around him and he fell with a heavy thud, dust rising up from the ground. Liar. No.

Before she knew it, the swarm disappeared as quickly as it had come, sucking itself inward into a different form, but with an unchanging black heart. Just as Carmilla solidified from her teleport, in that split second, clawed talons already held her at the neck, squeezing dangerously. _Mother._

Well, it had been worth the chance. Had she really ever believed she could escape? What happened to Liar would happen to her, and she was ready. No time for tears, she would rather laugh death in the face. What could really be worse than not having to exist anymore, not having to deal with any more of life's nonsense? She thought she was ready. Elle was gone, just a brief, beautiful dream that could never be. There had never even been an Elle. She was a fool for betrayal, it met her at every turn. There wasn't anywhere to run she hadn't tried before.

Carmilla slowly choked in the firm grasp of Mother's slender white hand, which was just tight enough for torture. But Carmilla was too stubborn to struggle and try to prise open the iron fingers at her throat. She stood still and defiant.

" _Worthless_ child, you would dare use my own powers against me? The powers I bequeathed unto you? You little fool." Mother was not amused, clearly.

"Where is the girl?" Mother squeezed tighter. "What arcane magicks have you wrought here? Speak!"Carmilla had just enough will to point at Mother's claws, shrug and roll her eyes, seemingly without fear, before Mother looked impatient and threw her bodily away as though she was a rag doll. Carmilla coughed and gasped, unable to help rubbing her fragile neck as though she was some poor, cowering minion herself.

"Your childish insolence is tiresome. I did not raise you for this."

"No? Why did you raise me? Fun and games? A second at whist at the card table? I would love to oblige, Mother, why don't you enlighten us all with _the truth_?"

Carmilla stood up and dusted herself off as nonchalantly as she could. In a flash, Mother's invisible power had suddenly dragged her forward, in choking distance again. Carmilla would not cower, not this time. Mother's hooded minions had now recovered and surrounded them out in the courtyard. They would never be on her side, none of them. She'd always walked alone. But perhaps she could distract them all with good melodrama, one last hurrah.

"Beware. Do not try my patience, foolish daughter. Where is my prize?"

"Gone, I expect." Carmilla shrugged. "I hardly know."

"Gone? How have you done this?"

"Oh, dear Maman, 'twasn't I, she fluttered away like a butterfly, now that the summer has come-" Mother's hand raised and without warning struck Carmilla across the face.

Carmilla shook her head slightly, trying to work the ringing out of her ears. Her jaw opened and closed achingly. Two trails of blood now marred her pale face, dripping from her cut lip and bleeding from her nose. Carmilla wiped the bloody trail from her upper lip and stared at the crimson stain on her hand as though she had never seen her own blood before.

"I really tire of people doing that to me," she muttered, licking her lip slightly.

"Do you understand what you have done?!" Mother said in an even, steely voice that bode ill for everyone within a ten mile radius. The cult of vampires all took a step back as they felt the evil energy force arch its back and push outward. "Do you know how long I have waited?"

"Oh well, I suppose you'll have to find another victim. Hark, here is an idea - why don't you kill me? _Like you did the rest of my family_?"

A beat.

Mother laughed now, laughed long, and Carmilla, despite herself, despite wanting to appear bold, quailed and shrivelled inside. She had not heard the evil of that laugh for - well ever. There was some new note of amused, bitter threat Carmilla could not place. Maybe Carmilla had bitten off more than she could chew.

"Ohho," laughed Mother in her silvery mirth. The vampires took another step back, standing uncertainly, as if poised to flee her wrath at any moment. "You amuse me dear, greatly. I'm so pleased. And who told you that little story?"

"Hell will have its sacrifices Mother. No sacrifice without blood."

" _Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned._ "

Mother said the words as though they were the incantation to a spell. Her shadowed face moved and shifted and the shadows danced over her frightening visage with its bright red lips. She smiled as though she had swallowed something distasteful.

"Well, well, look how the little girl learns _so quickly_ , after a century or so of murder and mayhem. And what else do you know? Tell Mother. Mother is waiting to be _impressed_ by your nursery tales."

"Why don't you kill me? Why didn't you kill me then, in that night of slaughter? Why keep me alive, why turn me into a monster?" Carmilla snarled furiously, suddenly impatient. She was close to breaking. The vampires hesitated, but stepped forward, closer to Carmilla to subdue her if necessary.

There was a pause as Mother surveyed her red talons calmly, undercutting Carmilla's tense anger.

"Oh Mircalla, always _so_ melodramatic." The dark Queen looked bored and dismissive. "Most young girls would appreciate the chance of another night alive, another ball to enjoy, another beauty to _seduce_. But not my _ungrateful_ diamond daughter, dear me, no -"

"The Baron told me all, before you sacrificed him to the darkness!" Carmilla growled with a deep, portentous anger, clenching her fists. "I know what you have wrought. I know what you are. I know of your vile, twisted loves. Where are your fine speeches now, Mother? What have you to say?"

"Oh my dear, the poor Baron should have held his _tongue_ but I suppose it suffices that I held it for him - _before I cut it off_. He was quite the worst consort I have ever had the misfortune to turn. So many loathsome, _oily_ speeches to the young ladies," the Queen pretended to shudder in her elegant way. But Carmilla could tell that something in her words had stung Mother and now she really was furious.

"Oh my - but his sickly sweet nothings seem to have made an _impression_ on my darling dear. Had I known you fancied the gentleman I would never have -" the Queen bared her pointed teeth, "waited so long before sacrificing him."

In the silence that followed, the force of the dark Queen's aura pushed insidiously against all within her sphere and grew with such pressure it suffocated, choking out all the air. Everyone fell back suddenly, unable to bear it, bowing their heads and averting their eyes, as though in helpless reverence, as the evil wind rushed around them. Carmilla struggled upright as the force subsided, feeling weak and broken now. The force was too much for her to handle.

"I don't understand. I don't understand. You need a sacrifice. Well here I am. I'm done." Carmilla shifted uncertainly, wringing her hands. It was not easy to declare defeat, but Carmilla was tired. She was tired and she wanted to be done with all of this. Done with all the thinking, of people she shouldn't think about. The people she had hurt. All the lies.

" _Darling_ child, do not look so _downcast_. You and I are as _one_. You have no power but what I choose to give you. You have no worth but for my favour. You would do well to remember. Mother _always_ knows best. The darkness does not deserve my glittering girl. Not yet," said Mother in amusement. She snapped her fingers at two of her minions, who faded away silently.

"My poor _confused_ child. Come, stand by me. Let me comfort you. No?" The Queen smiled in a wide grin. "Petulant girl. Very well. Perhaps I have been _too cruel_ to my sweet little bon bon. We are as one as I have said. If you suffer, ohho, Mother _feels_ it, believe me. I feel it all, as deliciously as a fresh picked peach, lying in the sun all the morning. How the sweet juice runs as I _bite_."

The two vampires had returned, levitating an old stone sarcophagus between them. All around the surface were symbols, strange and mystical, worked into the stone. They placed it down gently by the side next to Carmilla and the Queen. Carmilla couldn't help but shiver at the sight of it.

"Perhaps you are _right_ and my little girl deserves a holiday? I know how much you have always wanted to see... _Paris_ , was it?"

The vampires raised the stone lid with a muttered incantation. Inside, Carmilla was horrified to find it was full of blood, sloshing a little up and down the sides as it settled into a crimson warning of her future. 

"What is this?" said Carmilla, trying to step back, but an invisible pull from the Queen prevented her from moving. Her insides were twisting up in fear in completely new ways, even after a hundred years of knowing what the dark Queen was capable of. What was happening? What was going to happen?

"Tell me what you have done with the _worthless_ human, and I shall let you go. Continue on your _obstinate_ path to protect the insignificant little creature, and you will have a trip to the city of _romance_ you shall _never forget_. Say hello... to your new home, Mircalla." Mother hissed her name as though it disgusted her.

"I can't... I can't leave here," whispered Carmilla. "You cannot undo an enchantment you have already placed upon me. You cannot go back on a bargain struck. The letter of the law, Mother. It is greater than even your powers."

"Do you think I am such a fool as to reveal _all_ my secrets? This has not been the work of a _moment_. This is no mere coffin. It has taken me years to perfect this _lovely_ little home for you. Oh dear, I somehow _knew_ one day my daughter would betray me." A false note of long suffering world weariness had entered the Queen's tones.

"Stop. Stop lying. Stop pretending we are anything to each other. You are no family of mine. I hate you. I hate you!"

"Unworthy Karnstein _spawn_ \- I _hate_ you and I _love_ you, more than is bearable," the Queen snarled viciously, displaying all her enraged passions finally. Carmilla was stunned into silence in the face of the Queen's ferocious ire. There was something behind it, something she didn't understand, something she needed to know. 

"I have done far more for you than you are aware. So I think you shall _suffer_ all the torments I can devise for an _ungrateful_ child. For the last time, give up the true love you have _stolen_ to me and your Queen shall show you a mercy you little deserve."

The Queen attempted to compose herself after her unexpected outburst, but her face was still pale with intense anger. She would not forgive this. They had all seen her break from her lofty evil perch, Carmilla, her minions, everyone. They had seen a flash of her true face. She would not forgive. Carmilla had never seen her so scarily furious. It was almost as though she believed she was her mother, that she had some right to Carmilla's loyalty and obedience. But she was not some fresh eighteen year old girl to be tricked anymore. That was a hundred years ago.

"I do not know where she is gone. This is the truth. I beg you to release me. Kill me. Just let me go." Carmilla's voice was dull, tired.

"Lies, always lies with you, Mircalla. I am _disappointed_ by your loyalty to a mere speck of dust when I have given you life enough to live among the stars. Did you not see how _easily_ she turned against you? How they all turn against you?" The Queen drew up her taloned hands dramatically, forcing Carmilla to float above the ground.

"Perhaps you should go away and think about what you've done. Yes. I think Paris is a lovely place for you." Mother laughed mirthlessly.

"No! Please. No!" Carmilla struggled, but felt her limbs bound to her side by some invisible force.

Standing by the foot of the sarcophagus, the Queen held up her palm, the fingers long and curled, like a spider's legs about to grapple its prey. As if drawn by magnets, Carmilla's face was sucked into the expanse of that open hand, until her face was covered. The skin of the palm touching her was smeared with some sticky evil she could not escape. She lost all free movement. Her eyes, wide open in utter terror, between the Queen's fingers, moved frantically, uselessly. There was no escape.

The dark Queen pushed her down and she fell slowly like a leaf on the wind into the open coffin. Second by second, blood seeped into the black of her clothes, making the colour impossibly darker. It touched her skin, she could feel the wetness everywhere. Carmilla now knew the horrors in store for her. She was going to drown in blood, drown forever, and yet never die. They would bury her in a foreign land, one she had dreamed of visiting for so long. Paris. What a horrifying joke for her last days of freedom. Forced to go against the enchantments that ruled her, she would waste away, far from home.

Finally, with her body submerged, the Queen pushed her face down with no effort at all, smiling all the while. As her hand released Carmilla's face and she felt the power return to her, Carmilla struggled for her life in one last, fearsome burst of energy, one last cry for help that would never be heard, but it was too late. The lid slid back into place with a heavy scrape of stone, the last sound that she ever heard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings Gentle Readers!
> 
> It's been a helluva week, I'm sorry for the lack of updates. Thanks for your patience and enjoy the continuing saga!
> 
> Let me know what you think. :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura has unsettling, disturbing dreams and fractured images she can hardly remember throughout the night.

Laura was dreaming. Of course she was.

But the dreams were not like before. They were somehow fractured, seen from a mirror of shattered glass. Laura herself felt broken, the real world leaching in, all her movements were so slow and sluggish, as though she was meant only to observe, not to participate. Or perhaps these were not dreams but memories from long ago she'd simply forgotten.

It was as if butterflies roamed inside her, making her sick and anxious and heavy. Each dream seemed to emerge crawling up her throat to escape and then they would fly out of her mouth before she knew it, before she could even cry out. She would run with her anvil feet after the butterfly dreams and never get close enough to study what it all meant before another was born.

That was what it was like.

First, she was a child, and afraid of the dark, terribly afraid. Her father was afraid for her and so she had inherited all his fears.

A voice she knew somehow had whispered to her, deep in her ear as she slept. _"Mother warns you..."_

She awoke in darkness and the voice had disappeared. When her eyes grew used to the dark, she was frightened to see a slight, black figure before her, almost reaching out to her. As the band of moonlight passed over the figure she could see it was a young woman, all in black, with an impossibly pale face, a grey face, only from her lip to her jaw there was drawn a vivid red mark, a scar of some kind that bled. It _hurt_.

Laura screamed in her child's voice and to her surprise the black figure slipped noiselessly under her bed in something like a panic, as though it was frightened of Laura herself. For a while there was quiet all around and young Laura could only hear the sound of her own breathing and her heart breathing fast. She couldn't hear anything else. Had she imagined it? She dared not look under her bed, the source of all her nightmares. She dared not.

"Are you gone, monster under the bed?" she asked timidly.

"No," came a low voice.

Laura was so surprised that the monster answered her she forgot to scream.

"Don't be afraid of me," the monster said sadly.

"I'm not afwaid," said child Laura. But she was afraid, even as the voice of the monster chuckled like an ordinary human girl.

"What is your true name, little girl," asked the quiet voice under the bed. "Tell me."

"Daddy says I'm not allowed to talk to stwangers!" said child Laura, and then she gave a loud, piercing scream.

In another moment, her father had entered and all the lights were on and it was the real world, no nightmare world any longer. Child Laura's heart beat fast.

"There's nothing there, love," said Daddy, after he looked under the bed for her.

He laughed a nice, safe, dad kind of laugh, and held her close and tousled her hair, giving her a kiss on her head. She leaned against him, her eyes closed drowsily for just a second.

Laura awoke to find her staring at her watch, an old one on her slight wrist, a freckle just under the band. Somehow there was a new bandage on her hand and the cut still stung like anything. Blood had soaked through the gauze a little.

Her hands were on the wide steering wheel of some car - no a van or truck of some kind, that jerked from side to side and up and down wildly. What the hell? The road was bumpy - no, there was no road, she was driving in a field with all its hidden hillocks and low lying vales. The gears complained loudly every time she changed them, and everything in the back that hadn't been tied down clattered this way and that. Oh god, she wasn't looking forward to tidying that up.

She wore field green, with a band around her arm of a red cross. Of course, of course, she was a field medic with the women's army corps and she was late, terribly late. Hence the unauthorized shortcut across some poor farmer's land, just outside of Paris, as if they didn't have enough to deal with. The Germans had bombed the forest to bits from the air and now there was open field where once there were trees.

 _Bump!_ Driving like this was madness, completely wild, but she'd never get another opportunity to be wild like this ever again. It was completely foolhardy to go this way but she couldn't afford to be late, not again. _Bump!_ Besides, the war was just over, it was time for people like her to clean up the mess. _Bump!_ The medic van caught some air that time and Laura smiled, feeling a little exhilarated... only to swerve frantically as something exploded close by with a deafening boom. Her heart was in her throat from the shock, her ears ringing.

"What the hell?!" yelled Laura to no one, in anger and fear, slamming her hand on the steering wheel and then wincing sharply as the cut split open, bleeding out into the bandage. She felt lightheaded from the wound opening and was in shock at how close she'd gotten from being blasted to bits.

They were supposed to have cleared all the landmines in this area. Someone was going to have answer for this, army corps nurses had enough to do without having to take their lives in their hands out in the field.

"God dammit!" she swore, as the wheels spun uselessly. Stopping the van, she got out, seeing the front wheel still spinning to a slow stop. The van had scraped onto some dirt mound, it wouldn't be too hard to free the van. But it was lucky that mound had stopped the vehicle when it did, for Laura just noticed the deep depression just in front, a result of the landmine explosion close by. The ground nearby sloped gently towards the deepest part of the pit.

She wandered over to the edge, looking curiously over it, completely forgetting that she was late. The crater was wide and deep, and in the centre, as though it had always lain there undisturbed, was some kind of stone slab - no, it was a stone box of some kind. Near it, broken in two, was a thinner stone slab, some kind of strange carving worked all over the top.

Laura was no archaeologist, but she loved history and she was certain archaeologists would want to see this strange phenomenon. She had to tell a friend of hers in the corps who'd studied archaeology in college before joining up, she'd know what to do. Fearlessly, she slid down the side of the crater and walked over to the stone box.

Something was wrong, she could feel it. It was pushing at her. Some malignant sense of wrongness was woven all around the stone. _Go back_ , something told her. _Go now, run!_ But something else was pulling her close, some feeling of loss she couldn't explain.

She peered over the rim of the stone and stifled a scream. Hell, there was a body. It was _her_.

Wait, her? How did she know this person? This body in a stone box in the middle of nowhere? No. It was impossible. She didn't even know her name. This was crazy. Laura shook her head clear. What was going on here?

It was a girl, young and beautiful. Her eyes were closed as though she were sleeping. The body, somehow, seemed fresh. But she didn't seem to be breathing. She was dead. No pulse. Dead then. Her face was an ashen grey, a hue made even more horrible by the red liquid surrounding her face and body, into which she was half sunk. Oh god, it was blood wasn't it? All of that blood, and the girl was covered in it. Laura felt sick and had to hold it in. It was old blood, smelling like death, but she had to remind herself she'd seen worse out on the field.

This was not part of the job, but dead body or not, Laura had to get the girl out of there. It was inhumane. Whatever this weird set up was. It was evil. The police could arrest her for tampering with a crime scene if they wanted to. She was breaking every rule in the medic's handbook if it came to that. But something drove her to right this thing that was very, very wrong. She didn't know how she did it, but she pulled and dragged until the body slid, wet and lifeless, out onto the good clean earth.

"God dammit," Laura cursed again, falling to her knees, as her hand stung. The cut had split open even more and blood was soaking her bandage. She felt weak. So much blood, everywhere. She hoped the cut wouldn't get infected by whatever was in the box. The stone box was pure evil, she wanted to run. God she was sick of the war, heartsick of all the death and dying. She just wanted to go home.

She held the head of the lifeless girl gently between her hands, laying her down on the ground. Her cut hand slipped against the girl's lips and all of a sudden to her horror, the girl's sharp teeth had snagged into the thin bandage and was sucking in the fresh blood of the newly opened wound, as though she was desperately gasping for air. Jesus. Not dead - but how? The girl's eyes had flicked wide open in utter fear at first, with an anguished, strangled cry from her hoarse throat as she came to, but even more frightening to Laura was what came next.

"It's you," said the girl in soft, weak words as she released her teeth from Laura's bandaged hand. "You came and found me." Her voice croaked as though her throat was a desert. Did they... _know_ each other? How could this be? The girl's eyes fluttered shut as her head fell helplessly against Laura's hand.

Laura lay her down. She wanted to run, so she did, in a panic, in utter revulsion at what she had found. It was horrifying, there were no words for the rotting evil inside and around that stone box, that coffin. Laura held her cut hand as though it was a stranger's hand, and once she got to the lip of the crater, she was sick over the ground.

She ran to the medic van, giving an indecipherable scream, slamming her good hand against the side again and again. She leaned her head against her arm, breathing heavily, trying desperately to calm down. She was a nurse, she had a patient. That was all this was. She didn't know the girl, she didn't have to know her. Nurse, patient. Physician, heal thyself. But god, she wanted to cry with grief, her heart felt like it was being torn to shreds at what she had seen. That girl. She had to not think about it. Just get the job done. That was the important thing.

Within seconds she'd freed the van. These old Citroën vans could take any kind of terrain luckily. With a screaming of gears she slid the van slowly down the long slope of the crater. In the back there was the refrigeration unit and inside that, blood for transfusions out in the field. She took out a transfusion syringe. She was probably going to get court-marshalled for this, for even taking out a transfusion field vehicle without backup, but this was an emergency.

To Laura's surprise, the girl woke up relatively quickly after the field transfusion, just after Laura managed to move her into the vehicle on a stretcher, but she was in a severely weakened state. She would need a lot of intensive care before she was back to normal, whatever that meant. Laura had to get her to the field hospital, stat. She had no idea how she was going to explain this, how she was even going to write up the medical report. She shivered and trembled suddenly, coming down from the shocked adrenalin rush she'd gone through. She held her head in her hands, regulating her breathing, shaking in a cold sweat.

"Where am I?" asked the girl in a frail voice. Laura's heart went out to that voice, but some lump in her throat stopped her from speaking. The girl's eyes followed her as she looked elsewhere, before noticing where she was lying, on a stretcher in the van. A sign in French reminding everyone of the basic medical field practices was pinned to the wall and a French manual hung from a hook nearby.

"Je suis à Paris?" asked the girl finally, in a low voice.

"Ouais." Laura felt safe hiding behind French. Something was telling her to hide, to run away. She hadn't listened but still the feeling unsettled her.

"Vous êtes française?"

"Non, canadienne." Laura admitted this reluctantly.

"Ah bon? Et votre nom?" continued the girl's hoarse whisper.

Laura hesitated, made uncomfortable by the girl's piercing, intense stare. Her heart beat fast.

"Uh. L - Héloïse," she lied, feeling ashamed and guilty for some reason.

At this the girl lifted a weak arm over her eyes, as though to shut out the light. She seemed defeated somehow.

Laura was suddenly a child again, well, an in-between. She was ten or eleven, she couldn't remember which. She was crying, crying bitterly, her knees drawn up to her mouth, muffling the sounds.

A knock came at the door.

"Dad, I told you I'm fine!" she called petulantly, somehow managing to wipe the tears from her voice. After a hesitation, her dad's footsteps could be heard going down the stairs in worried thuds, getting fainter and fainter.

Laura sniffed, wiping her eyes with a crumpled tissue and then suddenly pushed herself back in fear, huddled against the headboard. The french window in her room had opened and a dark figure was sitting calmly on the sill, one slim black leg swinging.

"Peter... Pan?" she half whispered, and then felt foolish as the voice laughed a strange, amused laugh.

"Not quite."

"I'll scream and my daddy will come. He's just downstairs!" said Laura, drawing up the bedclothes to her chin.

"You won't scream," said the voice calmly.

As the figure advanced towards the bed, light from the street outside fell across the face. It was a girl, not so much older, looking tired and worn out. She looked as though she'd been running forever and looking, searching for something, never stopping to rest.

"What are you doing? Who are you? Don't come any closer, I'll scream, I'll do it!"

"If you were going to scream you would have already done it, little creampuff," said the girl lazily. "Admit it, kiddo, you can't help being curious. That's going to get you into trouble some day."

"Go away, leave me alone!" said little Laura crossly. The girl laughed.

"Why the tears, Wendy?"

"I'm not Wendy, if anything, I'm Peter," said Laura defiantly, sticking out her chin.

"Oh, my apologies Peter, " said the girl humorously, bowing. "Are you remembering all the tragedies you've forgotten? Are you crying because you don't have a mother?"

There was a pause as Laura stared at the stranger over her knees, her mouth hidden.

"I don't have a mother," said Laura, her voice muffled.

"Oh," said the girl, disconcerted. "Well, they're not worth much, really. I wish I didn't have one." The girl's voice trailed off into silence. She stood there for a long time, staring at nothing.

"The kids at school don't like me," explained the child Laura finally.

"Well don't worry about that, little girl, they're just useless dimwits."

"I'm not a little girl!" said Laura crossly.

"Sorry, sorry. I had no idea you were such a firebrand as a small child, cupcake."

"You're weird," said Laura, scrutinizing the stranger, sniffling, although her tears had stopped abruptly with the appearance of her surprise visitor.

"I've heard that before. Listen, I came to give you this," said the girl, dumping a small, square parcel at the foot of the bed, hastily wrapped in some kind of cloth. "Don't lose it. Keep it close to you. A present from a friend. Just remember that."

"Am I dreaming?" asked little Laura, staring at the package. "Who are you?"

"Well I'm no Christmas elf, kid. Hey. You listen to me little - uh - girl person. Stop your sniffling. Be brave. There's a whole world out there that's bigger than all the bullies at your school. Bigger than your small town. God, I'm not very good at this," muttered the girl under her breath.

"So, one day you'll make lots of friends, Peter Pan. You'll be good at that. Make sure you find all the lost girls, and hold onto them, tight. That's your job. Okay?"

"Okay," said little Laura, staring at the girl strangely. Her face turned, distracted, as she listened. Footsteps had climbed up the stairs outside her door.

"Now tell me your name, little cupcake girl."

A knock sounded at the door.

"Your name!" said the girl in a low whisper, desperately.

"Love, is everything okay in there?" called her dad.

"Daddy, I'm fine, I told you," said Laura towards the door. But when she turned back, the strange girl was gone, the window was still open, and a night breeze made the curtains dance.

Anyway Laura was wearing a miniskirt that was far too short, even for her height. So awkward pushing it down for modesty. Her hair, god, was rigid with hairspray. To her surprise, she was riding behind someone wearing a helmet on a motorscooter, and one of her arms had snaked around their body. Her other hand was feeling her hair. She should have been wearing a helmet for safety reasons, but she wasn't - her hair was like a helmet with how hard and high it was. What had she been thinking?! _Worst hair day ever_.

"Never let me go," said a muffled voice, from within the helmet.

"I know, I won't," said Laura, putting her hand back, holding on. She leaned against the body in front of her then, her chest pressed lightly against the fine curve of the back. Through her thin dress and through the fine leather jacket of the person before her, skin spoke to skin, wanting the warmth and the closeness, wanting nothing between them. She trembled against the body, and the body shuddered in response.

"Hold on tight," said the muffled voice, warm and golden, and Laura nodded her head against the set shoulders.

The bells were playing somewhere in the distance, and suddenly they were surrounded by figures in black, riding motorcycles, loud and menacing, revving their engines.

"Remember, hold on, don't let go," said the voice, getting lost in the noise around them. "This is it."

"I know," yelled Laura, but she was yelling into no helmet and no ear before her, because there was nothing before her but emptiness and her arms were a circle with nothing to hold onto but air. Laura looked at her open palms in confusion, spreading her arms out. The din of the bells was getting louder.

"Come on! Run!" yelled the girl from out of nowhere, grabbing her hand as they ran across the field together. Laura was completely prepared this time, she was wearing cargo pants which was packed full of all the safety kits and first aid kits and bear spray kits her father had ever given her, in each one of the voluminous pockets. And she had a wooden spatula hanging from a belt loop. She wore a band tshirt declaring The Shins proudly and by god she would kick anyone in the shins who tried to stop them.

"Don't let go this time," panted the girl, "hold onto what you desire, no matter what. It's what you're good at. Remember."

"I'm holding on tight, I am," said Laura, struggling to keep up. The bells were getting louder, making her steps so sluggish and tired. "But I can't run anymore. Please, I can't."

The girl slowly stopped then, kindly, but looking defeated and resigned. She looked into the distance at the advancing dusty cloud of something they didn't want to meet, rolling close to the ground and getting rapidly closer. Her shoulders seemed so heavy that it made Laura's hand in her hand feel heavy too. Like failure. The bells rang out gravely, like tolling for death, getting louder.

"Cupcake, I'm never going to find out who you really are, am I?" said the girl, rueful and sad. Her beautiful eyes stared into Laura's, the gaze was unbreakable. Intense. Trying to tell Laura something in a language she didn't understand yet. The girl sighed then.

"So kiss me goodbye, Elle."

"What?" said Laura, slow and confused as the girl drew closer. Her lips parted and her eyes fluttered shut as a matter of course, her heart beating fast, but the bells were so loud as to be deafening.

When Laura woke up with a start, those damn bells were playing Let's Do the Time Warp Again _again_ , almost mockingly. She hated those bellringers, truly, she did.

"Damn it, Janet!" said Laura, all of a sudden crying bitterly, for no reason she could understand, her eyes blinded by the morning sunlight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! An update already, to make up for my lack of updates last week. I guess I'm on a writing roll.
> 
> Thanks for reading and sending in comments, you guys are awesome. If you haven't commented yet, hey, come and say hi. Let me know what your theories are this time... :)
> 
> p.s. Sorry to any historians reading this, I did my best with the research on field transfusions in World War 2.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura returns to the real world and to real life.
> 
> But the dream world is not planning to let her go any time soon...

This had to stop.

_"I have been in love with no one, and never shall, unless it should be with you."_

Carmilla's loving voice was whispering those low, desperate words again and again in Laura's mind.

_"You are mine, you shall be mine. Trust me with all your loving spirit."_

_Trust me._

But all too quickly the memory of her face would mutate into that cold, heartless sneer, echoing those final, mocking words which ricocheted in Laura's head, like rattling an empty cage. It always ended with this. With hurt and harm and helplessness.

_"She is nothing - she is worthless - a filthy human - she begged for it - can you really blame me, cupcake? You give it up so easily."_

The crook of Laura's arm was already wet with her morning tears. She lay there, her eyes shaded, trying not to... just not to, anymore. Really, it had to stop. She was worrying everyone around her. She was just lying helplessly, like the damsel in distress she never wanted to be.

Betty would not be lying here like this, she'd be up finding out answers, in her place. Betty would have tried.

Gah! This was stupid and weak and not what a tough investigative reporter would do. Crying over some stupid jerkface vampire who'd played her, made a fool of her. Was it possible to ever feel whole again? She didn't want Carmilla to invade her space, her thoughts, her dreams, her memories. Not anymore.

The splintered shards of the night's dreams were horrifying and heartbreaking, even in the bright light of morning. But they weren't real, they weren't. Just her fevered imaginings after the shock she'd had. She shivered as she thrust the last fading images of that blood filled coffin, Carmilla's still, grey face and her dark hair, soaked and matted with the horror, far from her thoughts, feeling sick to her stomach. God, how terrifying to be buried like that, half drowned in blood. But it hadn't happened, it hadn't. Just her mind playing tricks. As confusing as it all was, the dreams last night were somehow not as real as the ones before. Or maybe it was because she couldn't remember them as clearly. Hell, it was all such a mess in her mind. And the thing with her name, of course it must have been guilt over her little white lies. Well wasn't it? What else could it be?

 _Never let me go_ , Carmilla had asked in her worn out voice. The words repeated, hollow and faint, in Laura's head. _Hold on_. But no. She couldn't afford to care. No more.

Real life was full of noise this morning, the bells now loudly clanking some kind of discordant emo song she couldn't be bothered trying to figure out. Wait, was that really Green Day? Ugh, she hated Green Day. Those horrible shrieking bells, all the time. Why couldn't they just stop? _Wake me up when that song ends._

Just then the sound of a vacuum cleaner started right in her ear, loud and harsh, a great accompaniment to the bells.

Oh god, Perry. Just great.

Apparently Perry for some reason had decided Laura's room was common university property which meant it was part of her floor don duties to clean it whenever she was having a stress attack. Which was, well, sweet in its way but just so annoying right now when Laura wanted to be left alone.

After her awkward teary outbreak yesterday she thought they would understand that she needed time to think - and to not think ever again. She wished Perry would go away, it was too much to have everyone around all the time, invading her room. If she'd wanted this many eyes on her she'd have started a vlog. At least that would be therapeutic. That was a thought actually. Maybe when she didn't look so much like a wet rag.

Laura groaned and counted to ten, willing herself to be patient. She swallowed the lump in her throat, took a deep breath and opened her eyes determinedly, blinking through the tears that were left on her lashes. The real world glistened like a diamond.

"Perry, is there a reason why you're vacuuming my room?" said Laura, dully, her throat rough and hoarse as though she'd been yelling the entire night. Her nose ran from the silent crying. She wiped with the back of her hand. _Ok. Ew_. She wiped her hand surreptitiously on her sheets.

"Oh good, you're awake," said Perry primly, wrinkling her nose probably as she considered whether she could clean Laura's sheets from under her. She turned off the vacuum cleaner with her green rubber gloved hand. She threw a wet sponge into a nearby mop bucket with her other hand. It landed with a dull splash.

"I need - I need to clean, I need to do something normal otherwise I'll go crazy. Do you know how worried we've been about you? I've been worried sick!" said Perry in distraction, handing Laura her own Tardis mug full of steaming hot cocoa. Soap suds from her rubber gloves trailed down the side. Perry seemed really attached to those rubber gloves.

"Uh... thanks?" said Laura timidly, in the face of Perry's energetic bulldozing.

Confused, she sat up slowly, sipping the hot cocoa gratefully, avoiding the soapy drip, feeling an ache all over her body as though she had been running and running. Hot cocoa, her cocoa. It felt a little like coming home. Perry was such a good friend, even if she had her annoying moments.

"We really have to talk Laura. Now."

Perry sighed, sitting on Betty's bed.

Wait, where was Betty? The bed was empty. Laura blinked, looking around the room. What had changed? Was Betty okay? Laura blinked. And blinked again.

"What. _The Hell_. Is that?!"

She almost dropped her precious Tardis mug of hot chocolate all over herself. Rubbing her eyes awake, her gaze focused and refocused on her desk, on which there was a - no, it couldn't be - a white rose, impossibly beautiful, that drew her closer despite herself.

"Where in hell or Hogwarts did that rose come from?" demanded Laura, in a mixture of trepidation, fear and anger. She got up quickly, still aching, putting her mug down on the corner of her desk and stretched her hesitating fingers towards the rose, not daring to touch it, yet wanting to. How could this be real? Was this another dream? She pinched herself quickly and winced at the pain. Perry looked at her weirdly.

"I was cleaning up Betty's desk - it was Betty's. I thought it would cheer you up since Betty's not here. It's soothing to have something around that's just sweet and normal and not so... fungus-filled Silas all the time, you know? Like - houseplants!" Perry added as an afterthought. "Uh... ordinary ones that don't try and eat your fingers."

Laura was frozen in place. Images were passing through her mind at the speed of light. Carmilla leaning down on horseback, the light touch of her fingers, plucking a rose for her. Her rose. The look in her eyes as they stared at each other. A gasp as she had bled for the prize, a drop of red on white.

She didn't know what to think. Was she still in a dream? Please be only a dream. What was it doing here? Was it - the same rose? It couldn't be, could it? But it was so beautiful, it had the same magnetic presence. She was so confused and disoriented, she was finding it hard to breathe.

"It's lasted a long time, it's really lovely isn't it?" Perry sounded a little puzzled at Laura's vehemence about an innocent flower. Her voice rang hollow in Laura's ears as though she was hearing it through a pipe, far away.

"Oh no no, this is not happening. I am not letting this happen. It is NOT happening," said Laura defiantly. "Ow!" she clapped her hand to her neck suddenly. That bite. It stung. The sudden memory of that strange, throbbing, sensual pain as Carmilla's lips met her neck flashed before her eyes. Why was she feeling so much?

Laura's body shook uncontrollably. Perry looked worried, her hand reaching out uselessly, uncertain of what to do, what to say.

The truth was, Laura knew it wasn't just a dream. Her body was shivering with the remembrance of fear and anguish and all kinds of other confused feelings, coming down from the shock. It was all too much. She knew it, no matter how much she wanted to forget, to deny it. But her heart and mind were constantly at war.

"Where's Betty?" Laura asked suddenly, rubbing her neck gingerly. "Is she okay? Is she awake?" She took a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm herself.

As she spoke, staring at the rose, she realized with some relief that there was no drop of blood on the petals, and really, the stem was much longer than hers had been. But that still didn't explain the strange sense of attraction she got from the rose, that surrounded it like some mythical aura. It even smelled like Carmilla, the faint floral scent of roses and something deeper. It was definitely the sister to Laura's rose, a rose that had been plucked in a dream. Had this rose been sitting on Betty's desk the whole time? Where had it come from? What - what did that mean, here in the real world? Was this - could it be the charm that caused the weird dreams?

"Oh Laura," Perry was saying apprehensively. "Don't you remember? We told you when you woke up three days ago. You were calling for Betty over and over and we had to tell you she was gone."

"What?! What do you mean she's gone?!"

The blood drained from Laura's face as Perry's words sunk through her foggy brain. She slumped back into her desk chair and the momentum made her swivel away from the rose. No. Not Betty.

"No no no, I mean we moved her to the infirmary," Perry hastened to explain. "We moved everyone there. Not the student health one because absolutely no one at the university will take us seriously. It's a travesty. " Perry threw up her hands.

"No one will answer my calls and I can't get through to her dad." Perry set her lips in a firm line, disapproving of the university's poor practices. "I didn't want to rock the boat too much. I'm not crazy enough to risk a personal audience with the Dean. I am a floor don after all."

"Everyone?" said Laura, confused and fearful.

Other people besides Betty were affected? Laura cringed. Had she really spent all her time uselessly dallying like a lovesick schoolgirl while other people were being attacked through their sleep? Was the same thing going to happen to her? What had Carmilla done to her? She touched the bite on her neck again, nervously.

Perry nodded, her brow furrowed, and sighed heavily.

"It's - it's bad, Laura. Not just about Betty anymore. There are other girls. You might be in danger. We may all be in danger. We just don't know. We need to know."

Perry changed her tone, trying to cheer up Laura's shocked, downcast look. She patted Laura on the shoulder comfortingly, oblivious to the damp. The rubber glove left a moist handprint on Laura's shoulder and she narrowed her eyes, before adjusting her tank top to wick the moisture away.

"But luckily, it turns out the Silas Medicals and Musicals Society have been running an infirmary in their basement where they can practice belting out show tunes with a - a captive audience. So to speak." Perry smiled a little too cheerily.

"They offered to monitor the situation. I mean, it's just harmless, musical theatre fun you know." Perry looked a little skeptical at her own words. "Maybe with a little medical experimentation on the side." She cleared her throat awkwardly.

"Anyway, they're being taken care of, thank goodness. Danny organized it, she's been spending as much time there as she can. That Summer Society sister we met that morning when Betty fainted is also one of the victims." Again. Victims. Plural. God. What had she been doing, wasting time like this? Carmilla and her horrible vampire cult had been busy, and like a fool, she'd fallen for all the sweet nothings in the book.

"No I don't remember - I can't even tell what's real and what isn't anymore. I feel like I've been away for ages. I'm so tired." Laura's voice broke a little and she sighed at her own weakness.

"Oh no, Laura, I hope you're not coming down with it too - I know it's been hard. That bite on your neck looks... terrible. But we really need to know what happened to you, if it's the same thing as what happened to Betty and the others. If it can hurt you through your dreams, I mean where will it end? I mean this has got to stop. It has to stop now. We have to discuss this - this Carmilla - _thing_. And everything. You have no idea what we've found out. It has to _stop_!" Perry's stressed, panicked voice climbed higher and higher despite her attempts to seem calm.

"I don't want to talk about Carmilla," said Laura, her face hardening, turning away. "I don't want to hear about her, to think about her, to have anything to do with her ever again. I can't. I just can't, Perry. Forget it. It was just a stupid dream okay? A nightmare really. She's probably not even real. Can't we please just - stop?" She pleaded in denial to herself, breathing deeply, rubbing her temple.

"Oh Laura, honey. You might not have a choice. It was one thing to have just a random vampire dream girl out for freshman blood. But now you're telling us that vampire was Carmilla - it's so much worse than we all thought." Perry's voice was faint and full of fear.

Perry shook her head over and over. She was very definitely worried about this. She wasn't going to budge. But just hearing Carmilla's name was painful. There was no way she could ever talk about what had happened between them. To admit to being such a little fool, having her heart broken by a monster. No. Laura winced again as she felt the sharp pain again in her neck, reminding her of the horrifying danger she'd been in. That evil woman. If stupid Carmilla hadn't bitten her, if the bells at Silas hadn't rung just then...

"No, no, no," Laura shook her head as though it would remove all thoughts of Carmilla from her head.

"But Laura, Carmilla is -" Perry persisted.

"I told you I can't. I can't talk about Carmilla. Don't you understand?" Laura said through gritted teeth, her jaw clenching.

"Are we talking about Carmilla?" said Laf, walking in at just the right - or wrong - moment.

"Yes."

"No!"

Laura and Perry answered at the same time. Perry gave Laura a stern yet sympathetic look but Laura returned it with a defiantly unhappy one.

Perry and Laf both began to babble over the top of each other, so many words that didn't make any sense, spilling out like a water pipe bursting. Her head ached, her heart ached, her sinuses were all stuffed up and her ears were ringing. The noise of so many people and of bells all of a sudden was driving Laura crazy.

"Stop, stop. Seriously? I swear to Gallifrey if they don't stop playing those bells soon I am going up there and ripping their heads off," Laura said crossly, her head in her hands. As if on cue, the bells stopped and died down with a sheepish echo. There was - thank god! - peace and quiet for a moment.

"Now I don't want to be rude but could you two - get out?!" said Laura in a small, drained voice. "I just -" She rubbed her temples.

"Do you think frosh is Betty 2.0?" asked Laf in a loud, worried whisper to Perry. "She still seems pretty disoriented."

"It sure looks like it, but it doesn't seem like exactly the same thing. All the others dropped like flies into that weird coma really suddenly - as soon as the bells started playing again. Laura woke up instead. I'm beginning to think Kirsch's theory was right," Perry whispered back.

"Words that probably have never been said in the history of Kirsch ever," said Laf.

"Guys, I'm right here and I can hear everything," said Laura dryly. "There's no need to whisper."

Perry suddenly burst. She couldn't hold in her nerves anymore, she paced, flapping her hands wildly as she spoke. Laura tilted her head to avoid a shower of soapy water drops.

"Laura, okay - I have to tell you that I broke into Student Records last night. _I_ did, _me_ , Lola Perry, Resident Rule Follower. That's how serious this is. You see? That's why we have to talk about this Carmilla _problem_. I'm still shaking. Look - look at my hands." Perry showed them her rubber gloved hand, which indeed was shaking and dropping dirty suds over the floor. "Do you think I can use a bedazzler with these hands right now? No!"

"L, for serious, we have to know what kind of monstrosity we're dealing with. You have to tell us what you know, you're the only one who's come out alive. I mean awake. I mean so far. Eh, you might still die -" Perry slapped Laf's arm lightly in warning.

Laf coughed awkwardly. "I mean, I don't want to scare you but we need all the intel we can get. And then we need figure out how to capture the vampire, collect samples, and examine it under laboratory conditions." LaFontaine brought out a laptop and rummaged around their pockets for a usb key.

"And then what?" asked Laura.

"We kill it," said three voices in unison.

Laura turned to see Danny in the doorway. She looked exhausted and not a little pissed off at life. She strode in quickly, slumping on Laura's bed without so much as a hello, staring up at the ceiling for a moment. There was a pause.

"Um, kill -?" said Laura faintly, her voice a little high-pitched.

"Yes, Laura, we kill the vampire, we kill the monster, we reclaim our right as young women to walk around campus safely at night without interference from the zetas or other unnatural creatures," said Danny firmly, sitting up and looking Laura in the eye. "Hey, by the way. Are you feeling better?"

"Hey - better - kill -" Laura's voice was just repeating words weakly now. _Carmilla_ , her lips wanted to say, but she closed her mouth and then she closed her eyes, to stop any feelings from escaping that way. She didn't want Carmilla dead, exactly, she just - she didn't even know what she wanted. 

"But Danny, how can you just talk about killing a person so casually like that?" said Laura finally. "I mean maybe, what if she was being forced to -"

"I don't care what sob story she told you, Hollis. It's not a person. It's a thing, it's a monster. And it's after our friends, Laura. You have no idea what's been going on here," Danny said abruptly. "So have we got a new tally of Vampyra's victims?" 

"What do you mean - tally?!" Just how many victims were there?

Perry sat on Laura's bed with a thump, as though she couldn't take it anymore, clasping her rubber gloved hands together with a squeak.

"At first it was just about Betty collapsing because of something in her head but now -" Perry gestured helplessly with her hands spread out, empty, "What if we're all in danger? I mean this isn't just about dreams anymore. This is real. Laura, Carmilla is -"

"Aaand speaking of danger, I just came from the infirmary. That's what I came by to tell you. The medics gave me some bad news... and they gave me some good news. Ish," interrupted Danny. "So, one, the society completed their initial diagnosis of Elsie and the girls."

"And?"

"Two, they can't tell what's wrong. Nothing outwardly is wrong with them. But somehow the girls' life forces are being drained away, little by little, every day. Three, they've registered a massive spike in energy drainage in the mornings just before the girls might wake up and then it peters out during the day." Danny held her head in her hands, her elbows balancing on her knees.

"God, it's awful, they're all grey as though they're withering from within, like a leaf drying up all curled and gnarled. Every now again in the mornings they have these violent seizures, with their faces all twisted up horribly. They're dying."

Danny's hand trembled as she brushed her fingers through her hair tiredly, over and over.

"They're dying in the worst way possible and there's nothing I can do about it." Her voice almost ended in an angry sob. "Except find that vampire bitch and kill her."

"Well, damn," said Laf in the brief silence that followed Danny's outburst. "And the good news?"

"Oh," said Danny wearily, her palm on her face, "that. The Medics and Musicals Society have finished rehearsing for A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum and invited us all to watch their final dress rehearsal with the... uh... patients. That was their good news."

"Well, double damn," said Laf after yet another silence. "At least they're keeping themselves busy in the face of a bloodsucking apocalypse."

"I have to go see Betty," said Laura suddenly. "I can't believe I just - I have to see her. Now! We've got to - I don't know, do something! Now!"

She got up from her chair, pacing the room, absentmindedly rummaging for shoes, spatulas, bear spray, throwing all kinds of odds and ends out from a box under her bed.

"Whoa, Hollis, just hold your horses," said Danny gently. She sighed, "I know how you feel but there's nothing we can do right now. Trust me. I'll take you when it's time. Right now, they're under strict observation. It's - not looking good. God, Elsie, her face was just -" Danny's voice trailed off uncertainly.

"Laura, I just tidied that!" groaned Perry to herself, looking at the mess on the floor. All three of them pushed Laura insistently back onto her chair. "Besides, there are things you have to hear first. Things that we found out."

"What did you find out?" said Laura, slowly, apprehensively as her arms were released, looking at them. Three pairs of eyes stared back at her, gravely, and that made her nervous.

"Hold onto your sorting hat, L." Laf started, "Not only are our friends in dire straits from some lifesucking evil inside their heads but - well, we found out the vampire of your dreams is - she's - well the thing is, there's a Carmilla Karnstein registered as a student here at Silas." said Laf abruptly, not knowing how to put it delicately. "She's real. And she's here."

"Wait. What - what?! She can't be!"

Laura shook her head in shock and confusion. Somehow, in all her thinking about Carmilla, Laura had never really thought it likely that Carmilla would be right here, among the Silas student body. She always seemed so - otherwordly. Laura had been so desperate to lock it all away as part of some weird dream world, nothing more, that she hadn't mentally prepared herself for the possibility that Carmilla existed. Here, at Silas. And she was definitely not emotionally prepared. She wasn't sure what she should feel. Laura shivered despite herself, as though someone had just walked over her future grave.

"We were just researching everything we could, hitting dead ends all the time, books had been destroyed, pages torn out - we got nothing for 'Carmilla' or for 'Karnstein Hall' so I tried googling 'Mircalla Karnstein', you know, the name on that gravestone you saw in your dream." Perry paused. "There was some kind of vague reference to a Mircalla at Silas, long, long ago, and it's such an unusual name, so I thought, student records, of course! As floor don I'd be less suspicious so -"

"Yeah. So in the middle of the night Perry here did the whole 'less suspicious' mission impossible heist in Student Records and -"

"I just happen to have a black turtleneck - and uh, a grappling hook," explained Perry inconsequentially. "And I didn't find a Mircalla Karnstein, the records don't go that far back. But I did find a Carmilla Karnstein -" Perry paused to look at Laura nervously.

"and - well - I also found out what her current address is."

Laura's hand shook, the cocoa sloshing up the sides of her mug.

To know where the real Carmilla could be found. Where she could see her. Oh god. This was just too much.

She put her mug down again, rolled her chair back until it hit Betty's bed, as though she wanted to be as far away as possible when she heard the news. She could see the rose out of the corner of her eye, somehow a symbol of loveliness and mockery, just like Carmilla herself.

"Where is she?" asked Laura in a low, hoarse voice.

Perry sighed heavily.

"Laura - Carmilla Karnstein is registered to Room 307."

There was a beat as they stared at Laura.

"But - that's my room," said Laura faintly. "This room." The air suddenly felt too close in that room. She couldn't breathe.

"Yes. And what's even weirder is -" Perry hesitated "It looks like you and this Carmilla Karnstein were always meant to be roommates. Maybe it's a coincidence or maybe you've always been her target. Because Elizabeth Anne Spielsdorf has never been registered to Room 307 or even to Silas University. Betty isn't officially a student here."

"We're still trying to figure out what Betty is doing here but, L," said Laf, "if she hadn't been here that might be you in a coma. Betty being your roommate might just have saved your life."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings gentle readers!
> 
> I have to apologize for several things - for not updating mostly. I actually wrote this chapter the day after Ch 15 but didn't have time to edit it until now. So sorry for the wait but I'm afraid it's more of a stepping stone/filler chapter to the action to come, so you might not find it that worth it.
> 
> Life got really crazy all of a sudden (including deaths and broken bones - don't worry, none of them mine, I am not writing this from the underworld). 
> 
> Anyway, I also set up a sideblog tumblr in case anyone wants to hound me to update in future or has any questions.
> 
> There's nothing there at the moment but I might post some drabbles or notes on this work that might give you a few more clues not in the main story: http://strangeandsombre.tumblr.com/
> 
> Thanks again for sticking with the story, if you're still here. And oops, sorry, if you're not still here? I guess? :)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disturbing revelations of the murderous kind.
> 
> Carmilla has been a busy girl.

"Okay, okay," said Laura with a shaky voice, setting the crumpled brown paper bag aside. She ran a nervous hand through her damp hair, now darkening brown.

"Tell me everything."

"I'm sorry I spilled soapy dishwater all over you Laura," said Perry apologetically, "Are you sure you don't want another glass of water or something, you know, to calm down the panic attack?"

"Panic? Who's panicking?" gabbled Laura, wet hair plastered to her face, stuffing her face with one stale cookie after another, "I've never felt better in my life. So a murderous vampire who just tried to eat me in my dreams is going to be my roommate in real life. I can deal with that. Yep. Just another regular day at Silas."

She nodded as if to encourage herself, gave a half-hearted thumbs up and attempted some rapid breathing exercises, only to cough up a cookie crumb, and waved frantically for that glass of water after all.

"Well to be fair, Laura, no one knows where she is. I mean, now that we'd all really like to know, she's nowhere to be found. I checked the records - it was like she was just replaced with Betty and nothing more was said. I haven't found who signed off on that yet," Perry said musingly, handing Laura the glass of water.

"The Dean. We all know it's the Dean, Perry. The Dean, right? Dean, everyone?" said Laf drily, "It had to be someone high up."

"No, Laf, we don't know that. Let's not jump to conclusions. The Dean of Students, I mean really, why would she bother herself with something so small like this? It's so unbelievable. It could have been some ordinary, bureaucratic mixup."

"Perr, this is Silas, weird conspiracies be happening. Do I have to remind you that the Dean is organizing this mysterious Jubilee 'celebration' that we're no closer to finding out about? It's like there's some magical force distracting us every time we inch a little closer to the truth."

* * *

"Mother wants to know why you haven't taken the blondie's memories yet, Kitty," Will said, flipping a coin into the air like he was some two bit crook out of a B grade film noir. "Starting to think you're planning something again. Some people just never learn."

"What are you her messenger boy now? You know you look like an idiot doing that by the way. This isn't the 1930s anymore Willy boy, and thug life? Not a good look for you, baby face."

Will pocketed the coin impatiently.

"Listen, Kitty, will you just quit making my life hard? I've spoken up for you when Mother wanted to -"

"Oh, gee, thanks snake eyes."

"You know what happened last time you tried this on," said Will, trying to reason with her.

It was moments like these Carmilla hated, when Will showed a throwback to some gentler, more human side of himself. Times like these she could almost believe he could be some kind of family. But he had it in for her, just like all the rest. He was determined to be Mother's right hand man, he was almost fanatical about it, toeing the line and jumping whenever she snapped her fingers. It was unfair to see something in him, that made her question whether he was friend or foe. Whatever. She wasn't going to be fooled, not again.

"Like you're some expert. You weren't even a glint in the milkman's eye when -"

"Not what I'm talking about Kitty. I saw you when you came back from Paris. I saw what it did to you. Paris changed you, from what I hear. You really want that to happen again?" Somehow he managed to make the words sound both sympathetic and threatening.

Carmilla was silent then, clenching her jaw, before throwing her book across the room in a burst of fury.

"If Mother wants the girl's memories so badly, why doesn't she just take them," she snarled, her jaw set. "She marked her, she can do her dirty work herself. I'm done."

"The girl took one of your roses, your responsibility Kitty-cat. You have to take a tithe. Them's the breaks. And Mother knows you were going to let her go. You know how that infuriates her."

"I thought Mother had some high-tech vampyriffic new invention now for sucking the brains out of young girls. If you ask me girl's halfway round the bend already thanks to Maman's thorny little stamp of approval. Leave me out of it, can't you? Or how about you do it? I know how much you like sucking faces and lets face it, it's the only way you're going to get any."

Will slammed his palm on the table, his face hard, but Carmilla swivelled in her chair back and forth, unperturbed, nibbling on a cookie.

"How about you stop being such an emo loser for a change? Rules are rules, and I don't make them." Will cracked his knuckles lightly. "But I do enforce them," he said, smiling insincerely.

"Oh give me a break," said Carmilla, her mouth full of cookie crumbs, not at all afraid. She swallowed them down, licking her lips and took a sip from the red stained straw of her drink.

"Oh don't think that I won't sis." He jerked her shoulder with his fingers in an annoying taunt, causing her to swivel in her chair again.

"Well any break that I give you will be to your worthless sack of bones you pathetic mamma's boy," Carmilla growled.

"I just made that joke, and I made it more subtly," Will pointed out.

"Well - well done... you!" Carmilla glowered at him. She breathed out heavily in irritation.

"If you must know, I did scan the girl in her sleep okay? She was a brainy one, I'll give her that. But damn, the blaming and the wailing and the gnashing of teeth. 'If she wasn't already dead, I'd kill crazy grandma Rheinfeldt for sending me here... oooh!'" said Carmilla in a cartoonish, high voice, waving her hands in mock anger "just over and over and over again, hell. Boring. It's all just so incredibly tedious. So kiddo, you can just tell Mother from me -"

"What?" said Will shortly. "What did you say?"

"What? She was being boring over and over and over again?"

"No, before that."

"Uh, she was being boring with all her weeping and wailing?"

"You know what I mean. What did she say? Tell me," said Will, a little wildly, thumping his fist on the table again.

"Whoa. Maybe you should take Anger Management 101 this semester."

Will gave her a look.

"She said 'I'd kill crazy grandma Rheinfeldt if she wasn't already dead,'" said Carmilla slowly. "What's the big deal, Willy boy?"

Will was pacing the floor nervously for a long time, gnawing on his knuckles. Finally he turned to her with a face full of desperation.

"Carmilla, you have to help me."

* * *

 

Jubilee? What was this reminding her of?

 _They are practicing for the Jubilee_ , Carmilla had said, her face twisted with some kind of unexplained hate. But why hate?

But Laura shook her head clear, her hands hovering as if she could arrange all the information she was hearing in neat piles in front of her.

"Wait, this is too much. One thing at a time. Where is Ca- where is the vampire? Am I going to die? I'm kinda interested in that bit. Let's start with that. I'll take notes."

Laura pulled out her journalism notebook and looked expectant and apprehensive, willing her hands to stop shaking.

"That's the thing. No one's seen any signs of her all semester. I couldn't find out anything about what classes she was registered for," Perry said. "If she's not careful she's not going to be able to matriculate."

"Really, Perr, that's what you're worried about? A centuries old vampire murderess not being able to matriculate?"

"I'm just saying too many students treat university like some kind of endless party time and they should be aware that it's not just about turning up to class. Well turning up to class is the barest minimum -" Perry retorted, glaring at Laf.

"Okay, Perry, take off your floor don cap, moving on," Laura urged her. "Back to my possible death at the hands of an undead, amoral, jerkface roommate."

Laf and Danny glanced over at Laura, eyebrows raised at Laura's sudden vehemence.

"I mean how did Betty even get assigned to be your roommate when she isn't even enrolled? Really, Silas needs to update its student attendance record procedures, the mess I found at Student Records was unbeliev-" Perry continued obliviously, absentmindedly wiping down the water she'd poured all over Laura with a large towel.

"Perry!" Laura's voice was muffled under Perry's overly enthusiastic ministrations with the towel. When she emerged her hair stood up in a tangle. Laura blew her hair out of her face.

"Well, I've got a long list of complaints I'll submit to - to _someone_ \- if we ever survive this thing." Perry muttered finally. Her face, her entire body and the towel she held drooped suddenly at her own words.

"Join the club Perr, they never even responded to my petition on actual binary encoded gender recognition, surprise, surprise. Talk about specist." Laf patted Perry on the shoulder understandingly.

"My head hurts," said Laura to no one in particular, holding her head.

"Join the club," Danny repeated in hollow, restless tones from the bed.

"Can we _please_ get back to me being on the alive side of the alive-dead binary spectrum?" Laura pleaded.

"Speaking of which, L, please meet our wonderful, amazing new library friend who doesn't bite, scratch or give us paper cuts - JP, are you with us?" asked Laf, tapping on the space bar key of their laptop.

"Greetings everyone! How are we all this fine morning?"

"Fine. Fine. Oh I'm fine," babbled Laura, hardly fazed at the idea of meeting a sentient USB stick, after what she'd just been through this morning. "It's nice to meet you, uh, JP."

"Likewise! LaFontaine, I have further news to impart!"

"Oh great!" said Laf brightly, ever hopeful.

"None of it good!"

"Oh great," said Laf, discouraged, their hopes dashed.

"For starters, here's the latest tally of possible Karnstein victims and missing persons throughout the ages I've been able to identify as previously requested. There's a disturbingly massive spike in victims between -1872 it looks like, till just after the second world war but otherwise it's been fairly flat since then."

1872\. That year stood out like a slap to the face. Laura still remembered so clearly the red, angry sting to her palm as she slapped Carmilla's heartless sneer off for her. Had Carmilla gone completely psychotic after the events of the bell tower when Laura had disappeared? Or had they put it down to another crazy, unreal dream when they found her missing? Laura wished she knew how much of the dream world was real and how much was false memory. She touched the bite on the neck distractedly.

But then - that weird, horrific dream she'd just had. Paris, just after the war. The landmine exploding so close, frightening her. Pulling Carmilla, half-drowned in blood, from that stone coffin, all worked over with strange carvings. She didn't want to think about it but her mind kept pulling her back. What had she been doing there in that coffin, in that place? Hadn't Carmilla always said she could not leave Karnstein Hall? Had it been punishment for the victims whose lives she'd destroyed? And was any of that even real?

As Laura shook her head at herself she realized Danny had been observing her from her bed, frowning intently. She turned to Laf and JP quickly, guiltily.

A long list of names blurred rapidly down the screen of Laf's laptop, going on endlessly on and on and on, beeping and whirring. Laura's jaw dropped as the list continued. Perry pushed her jaw shut helpfully, nodding and shrugging at her as though they were used to this kind of bad news by now.

"Oh god, why am I not surprised. Okay wait, hold up, JP, standby." Laf looked over at Laura, "Okay Lois Lane Jr, I have a feeling you're not going to be surprised by this either but we did a bit more digging after Perry's nighttime escapades - and I'm pretty sure young Carmilla of Karnstein Hall of the rhyme you found is exactly the same person as Mircalla, Countess Karnstein, who died in 1698, whose grave you dreamt about. JP found an earlier reference to the rhyme with Mircalla's name instead of Carmilla's."

"I... kinda knew that. Actually."

Laura felt so guilty. It was drawing too close to a conversation about her own personal interaction with Carmilla and that was something she really didn't want to get into just now. Laura was all prickles for the moment, already standing on guard against an attack, against Carmilla, against herself, from her friends. But Perry had thankfully continued on from Laf.

"Well while I was, um, researching student records I also found out - she's also Millarca Karnstein, Arcmilla Karnstein, Marcilla Karnstein, any number of other obvious aliases, all of whom have been students at this school... over the years," said Perry. "And every time she pops up, during the time of the mysterious Jubilee, which we still don't know too much about, people go missing."

"I... did not know that."

It just got worse and worse. Was there any way to see Carmilla in a good light now?

"Apart from having an almost pathological obsession with anagramming her name, there's almost no other information about her student activities anywhere. As for this semester, she's entirely disappeared, as though she never existed. I feel like if we knew more about Karnstein Hall and where it actually is - if we could only find its location we might be able to figure out more clues," said Perry. "But all the maps I've poured over - it's all just so vague. Everything's been destroyed."

"Guys, Betty was warned not to go there. It must have been for a reason. But why did Lucrezia Borgia Jr. warn us to stay away?" mused Danny. "If she's got something to hide there, I think that's exactly the thing we need to find out."

Laura opened her mouth to say something, but JP was beeping excitedly. They turned back to the laptop.

"My good fellows! Karnstein Hall! Speaking of which I must tell you all, it's terribly fascinating, it wasn't easy but I've finally uncovered a veritable treasure trove of folklore about the so-called _Monster of Karnstein Hall_ ," JP typed.

"Of course you must take this with a grain of salt - folklore is an uncertain reference.

But as the story goes Countess Mircalla Karnstein went on a murderous rampage soon after her death and the assassination of her entire family.

It is not clear whether she killed them before she became a vampire or after. It is not known how the transformation was effected, but the rumour then was that those humans, more or less wicked, with unholy lusts and murderous passions while living may naturally become vampires after their death, especially if they put an end to themselves in ungodly suicide.

What is clear is that once she became a vampire, she destroyed everything in her path, all of the peasants who depended on Karnstein for their livelihoods, no one was spared. There was no mercy. This was the origins of her title, The Monster of Karnstein Hall.

The villagers nearby fought back, they razed the area to the ground, until virtually nothing remained of a once famous and glorious estate. They attempted to destroy the Monster by all the known means of dispatching a vampire but she suddenly disappeared and was not heard from for years, almost out of living memory, until one day as the story goes "the bells tolled for their time had come, and young Carmilla came riding home."

The first appearance of the name Carmilla comes in 1872, which appears to be a fateful year in the annals of Karnstein Hall. I'll remind you that 1872 was also the year the number of victims increased dramatically.

After that there were only rumours and hearsay - no one lived to tell the tale of having seen her, but people went missing. Mostly young maidens. Mostly blondes or damsels with gold in their hair.

Soon, no one went near that place of evil, the graves of so many innocents fairly littered the area. Maps to the estate were destroyed, all historical references destroyed, the Karnstein name was struck from all good society. All that remained were the dark fairytales and the songs of the nearby villages, to frighten young girls and warn them not to stray. As mentioned I found evidence of the warning rhyme in a number of different towns' local histories, with each of Mircalla's names. It took a while for the separate villages to match the names to the same person.

Beware, young Mircalla; beware, young Carmilla; beware, young Millarca, you get the picture.

But that is all I've been able to find out thus far."

Complete, stunned silence met JP's news. Bare and unadorned yet entirely terrifying revelations that somehow made the mere tally of possible victims even more horrifying. They all exchanged frightened looks that said more than words could ever say.

_"Good riddance, to someone who would have been witless enough to become a monster to others had she lived. Let her die a monster and have an end to it."_

Laura shivered though the day was warm. Had Laura simply imagined the bitter pain and loneliness she'd heard in that Carmilla's voice, so long ago? Why had Carmilla said that about herself, what did it all mean? Did it give Carmilla pain to have had those very words thrown back in her face? If so, was there some spark of humanity in her after all?

She'd been so sure Carmilla had tricked her, had fooled her into feeling things, had used her to upset her Mother, all of it heartbreaking enough - but that had been a private thing, just between them.

This - this was murder and unspeakable evil on a whole new level. Laura felt sick to her stomach. All those girls, all those innocent people. Could it possibly be true? That silent journey through the ruined estate, the stale smell of smoke, the feeling of evil eyes tracking their passage, flashed into her mind. But then there was Carmilla herself, how she touched things, how she touched _her_ , how she cared.

What was a lie and what was true? Could evil also be loving? When was a monster not a monster? Laura didn't know what to think, she just came up with question after question. Panic rose in her every time, and no sooner as she was done dampening it down, it rose in some other direction, just as strong and just as difficult to answer. Wasn't it true that psychopaths could fool anyone? And Laura had very definitely been a fool, all along. Her friends had been able to find out so much, so much that horrified and alarmed them about this monstrous fiend, while Laura, dunce reporter, had been swanning around getting her heart broken by that same monster.

"Uh so, gang, can we - uh - maybe reconsider this whole hunting down a murderous vampire who has killed hundreds of people idea?" said Laf, breaking the silence. "I mean, I have papers due, specimens to experiment on, petitions to draw up. My hands are full."

"I'm with Susan - sorry, LaFontaine, I just get so nervous sometimes - this sounds like it's way out of control. This is too stressful. We're not equipped to deal with this. If I die before I graduate my parents will kill me," babbled Perry nonsensically.

"If we don't hunt down this wannabe blood countess bitch, who will?" asked Danny shortly. "You should see the state of the victims guys. It's no joke. I don't think we have a choice. I think we can do it. She's the only one we have to take down. There are four of us. Five if you count the overgrown puppy dog and six if you count binary bro here, who I'm sure can annoy her by spamming her email account or something, right JP?"

"Oh. I'm a librarian, not a hacker, but uh, I suppose -"

"All of this is moot, gang, because unless she comes waltzing in here saying, 'hey frosh, I'm your new roommate, and by the way, what's a little bloodsucking and certain death between friends,' we have no idea how to find her, much less hunt her down."

They stared at each other glumly. They were at an impasse, but for the information that only Laura knew. Information Carmilla had told her in confidence. Remembering how weak Carmilla had been in Paris, it made complete sense. Was betraying a monster for the good of the people really betrayal?

She took a deep breath.

"I don't know where she is," Laura said slowly, staring hard at the floor, "but I've a good idea where we might get some answers. Don't ask me how I know, but Carmilla can't leave the boundaries of Karnstein Hall without - without suffering. If she's away from the Karnstein estate, she's severely weakened. So maybe we need to get her away from there to a neutral place where we can - ask her to explain herself."

Laura sighed.

"You guys, I think I might know where Karnstein Hall is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings my dear readers,
> 
> You're all awesome! Thank you for sticking with the Bell-verse. You might find some continuity problems with this chapter so forgive me if I make any errors. It's just getting so hard to keep untangled even with all my many charts. I'm doing my best to keep it good quality so sorry for updating less frequently than daily. Hah!
> 
> For those who don't know, I took someone's advice and started a writing tumblr for this and have actually posted a few short fics and drabbles in this universe, as well as my influences. Each fic fleshes out the story and offers you one clue to ... something. But it's not necessary to follow the main story, only if you're feeling bored.
> 
> It's also a place for me to keep my thoughts organized about this fic, with visual and literary influences etc.
> 
> You can find the tumblr here: http://strangeandsombre.tumblr.com/
> 
> Feel free to say hi, I enjoy hearing from all you lovely readers. Thanks again!


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More necessary revelations! I'm sorry in advance, don't hurt me, no really, please put that knife down.
> 
> Join me here for more ficlets relevant to your interests: <http://strangeandsombre.tumblr.com/>

"It's here," said Laura simply.

"What do you mean?" Three pairs of eyes stared at her in confusion.

"I mean we're there. I mean here. I think we're on the Karnstein estate right now. I don't know exactly what counts as the Hall, but I know a few landmarks that could help."

"How - how do you know?"

_Those faraway bells you hear are from the bell tower at Silas Field, one of the few remaining structures left to us here._

"The belltower at Silas Field," said Laura, slowly, "That's what she called it. I think that's where we need to investigate."

"She?"

"Carmilla," Laura whispered, a little glumly.

_If we are apart, if you are lost, follow the sound of the bells to Silas Field. You cannot miss that, no matter what enchantments are woven around the land. I will look for you there. I will find you. But I warn you, you must take care, you understand? It is a dangerous place..._

No. This time Laura was going to find her, enchantments or no enchantments. And she was going to give her a piece of her mind, that no good, heartbreaking, stupid vampire. There had to be clues there, something that would tell them where Carmilla was hiding.

"So all the time we were warned not to go to Karnstein Hall, we were already there?"

"Pretty much."

"Lovely. Thanks for nothing, Countess Karnstein of the Useless Warnings."

They had already spent hours debating back and forth about the plan of attack, as Danny called it and plan of activities, as Perry called it. Little by little, Laura couldn't help revealing more and more about her dream adventures, feeling guilty every time for possibly betraying her - betrayer. The only thing she kept to herself was how Carmilla had played fast and loose with her affections. Their night together, however troubled the morning had been, was hers and hers alone. She'd been the only one who had felt anything at all, so that much at least was something she wanted to keep close to her.

They had laid out a map, outlining the boundaries of the Silas campus as best they could because surprisingly, only a silly student map of Silas existed, with no roads leading out or in. It was funny they hadn't really noticed that before. It seemed Silas University was an island unto itself.

"According to Laura, Silas Field is basically what the university campus is. So that's here. Maybe we can google earth it for any outlines of ruins for Karnstein Hall. I can do that later, or maybe JP can. Well, here's the bell tower, on the edge of it." Perry peered over the map with a pencil. "Interesting, on the Silas map, that's the oldest remaining structure, from medieval times, everything else is post -"

"1872," said Laura abruptly.

"Yeah. Just around the time the university was founded. And just when the number of victims started to spike. Isn't that - strange?" Perry looked puzzled.

1872\. Just when they were together and things fell apart. Did that have any real significance? The bells rang that year, it was a Jubilee year. But they still didn't know what that meant.

"Unless - they started the university to have easier access to young women," said Danny, looking visibly upset.

"This was one of the first institutions of higher learning in this area to accept young women as students and actually grant them degrees. That's why I wanted to go here. My mom went here. Lawrence women have always gone here. We celebrate that milestone for women's education every year at Summer Society, it's an old tradition, it's never changed. White rose garlands, white robes, the works. Although," Danny mused "just after the second world war we did add shooting fire-tipped arrows into the university pond to honour Artemis as part of the festivities."

"Whoa, that is - freaky," said Laf, "I am not down with the whole access to higher education for minority groups as a vampire convenience store. I am still not down with personally dying either, in case anyone's interested."

Danny started pacing the room, full of nervous energy, wanting to exercise it out. She ran her frustrated hands through her hair repeatedly.

"I can't even - everything we hear, sounds worse and worse. I have to - I have to go do something. Ugh! I'm sorry guys. I'm going to the infirmary. Hollis, if you want to come by later to see Elsie - Betty! I mean Betty. If you want to see Betty, text me. I need a break guys, this is - too much. Let me know if you find that walking hypodermic needle in a haystack. God dammit! I hate this!"

Danny beat her hand hard on the door frame as she left quickly, leaving an emptiness in her wake. They stared after her, rattled by her sudden anger.

"It's just that - Summer Society is so important to Danny, you know?" Perry said, excusing her. "It's her whole life."

Laura was silent. Danny had taken a strong, righteous energy away with her when she left the room, but maybe that was a good thing. One thing she was sure of now - she didn't want Danny to meet Carmilla by accident, not without having a chance to question Carmilla herself. It made her nervous the way they all spoke of killing another living being so casually, even one who was as horrible as Carmilla.

 _She's not alive, she's undead_ , Danny would have retorted. But then, Danny had been the only one so far to really see the victims writhing in the morning seizures that were draining them of their lives. Danny had always been one to feel so much for helpless creatures, to defend the weak against their oppressors. She couldn't help being anything other than a knight in shining armour.

"Okay, what about this then?" Laf was asking, trying to get back to the subject. They pointed to Silaston, just outside campus.

The tiny local village of Silaston, which Laura in her nerddom had been wont to think of as a Silas version of Hogsmeade, had mostly university run shops and everyone there lived and worked for Silas. Why had they never really thought this was a little odd? Why was it that no locals lived in the surrounding areas anymore?

"So basically the only road in or out is right there. The campus is huge, and we only have one way in or out. It's ridiculous. Here - Miles Cross, right by the bell tower. That's where everyone came in and out at the start of semester right? Otherwise it's stone walls and forest, everywhere. And mountains. Silas is like a fortress."

"Okay, Silas is only a part of Karnstein, I think it's the old Karnstein town. Karnstein Hall must be close by. We need to find a road. On one side is a wood, and on the other a hedgerow overgrown with roses. If you stand a little... north west I think, there are fields in the distance leading up to a forested hill or mountain of some kind," said Laura, her eyes towards the ceiling as she tried hard to recall what she'd seen long, long ago.

"Well mountains aren't too hard, I mean the mountains of Styria are right here," said Laf, tapping at the map. "That might be either a road or a stream, winding up this way. I can't tell. This map is too old."

"If that little squiggle is the road you're talking about, Laura, we might have a problem," said Perry.

"Why?"

"It's outside campus. That means we need special permission to go there. I mean we have to fill out forms and stuff and it takes a week to process. Don't you remember the Dean's new rules? Didn't you write a huge anonymous rant about it on your Silas blog that got shut down because of it?"

Laura looked crestfallen for a moment, before brightening up.

"Or -"

"Or?"

"We break out in the dead of night. I mean, journalists never follow the rules if they can help it," said Laura, "A girl's gotta manufacture her own excitement sometimes. And I am getting pretty tired of people pushing me around and telling me what to do, in or out of my dreams."

"But honey, to get there we'd have to scale this enormous stone wall - who knows what's on the other side?!"

"I may not know what's on the other side but I do know something Perry," said Laura coaxingly, as Perry looked sceptical. "You have a black turtleneck and a grappling hook. Do you, um, mind if I borrowed that?"

* * *

 

"I can't believe I fell for your lies again, god dammit," said Carmilla, throwing a glass at the wall until it shattered into a hundred pieces. "You're cleaning that up." She cradled her head in her hands, sitting against the wall with her elbows on her knees and groaned. "What the hell did I do to deserve this? Why?!"

"One, thanks for the compliment, Kitty," said Will, smirking, "I always was a better liar. But two, look, I'm sorry, this time I honestly didn't mean to betray you -"

"William," Carmilla said through gritted teeth. "You do realise the thing happened that you didn't want to happen, only worse and now I'm taking the fall for it - again?!" Carmilla glowered. "Mother just needs one more thing after this. One, William. Do you understand?"

"I will totally clean up that glass for you, totally." Will said lamely. "I said I'm sorry!"

"This doesn't mean we're quits Will. You owe me. You owe me big time. How do you expect to pay up? I now have zero chance of not being the tithe this year, thanks to you, loser breath."

"Yes, but in my defence, you're so emo you've already volunteered enough times, it's your own fault if they decide to take you up on it this time. And you don't know you're the tithe, no one knows. But," Will said, holding up a hand before she could interject, "I'll owe you twice over if only you'll do one more thing for me?"

"Oh god, what more?! I can't fix this for you, you dimwit. What do you want me to go back in time and undo it?" Carmilla growled. There was a beat.

"Uh, yeah, kind of?" said Will, looking puzzled at her.

"What do you mean?" Carmilla said slowly. Some half-dying flame of hope had flickered to life at his words, but she couldn't quite believe it. Was such a thing really possible? She damped it down.

"Wait - you're not serious - are you serious? What?" Will exclaimed, before laughing uproariously. "Oh man, Kitty, don't tell me. You're what, 334, is it? And you don't know. Oh my dear god in hell, you don't know, do you?" He laughed, unable to stop.

"Quit being such a lackwit and tell me, you feeble hyena-brained bloodsucker," Carmilla said crossly. "If this is such a joke to you, why the hell did you beg me to do it in the first place?"

"Girl, you need to have spent more time at court talking to other vampires and learning more about the amazing new advances in vampire technology and less time studying ancient Sumerian and brooding about your mysterious past."

"Will, I'm warning you, this is serious, if you have something to say, say it," Carmilla said impatiently. "Before I rip out your collarbone and use it for a boomerang to kill all the annoying rat pigeons around here! Shoo!" The nearby pigeon fluttered off with a strong beating of wings and Carmilla spluttered out a small feather that had landed on her lips.

"Dude, you can give her back her memories. There's a safe place." Will thought for a moment."Well, relatively safe. It's safer. Meh, it's only occasionally dangerous. Anyway, you're the one who holds her memories right now, not Mother. She can't take them till the Jubilee. The girl took a rose. So take it back."

"But it's too late, she's here, at Silas. Mother knows who she is. This is what you didn't want to happen, right? Or am I somehow in some crazy alternative universe where I can just waltz up to my victims and offer their memories back? She's not going to know anything! It'll be embarrassing!"

"Embarrassing, really? Well you could at least try. Being you is already an embarrassment. You're such a pessimist." Will ran a hand through his floppy dark hair.

"All right, how do you propose I do this, bird brain?"

"Kitty, Kitty, let Sweet William tell you a couple of things you might find interesting..."

* * *

 

"We have to girl the hell up and go to the belltower now," said Laura, determined, thumping her desk.

"Does that mean I have to wear a dress?" asked Kirsch, "not that I mind, I just wish I'd known in advance so I could shave my l -"

"Kirsch, shut it," said Laura.

Kirsch had stepped in to pick up some of Betty's things that Danny had requested for her. He'd told them in unnecessarily lurid detail of how SJ had writhed unbearably in her seizure, curling up like a dry leaf on fire, clawing the air as though to ask him to help her. It was horrible.

"Ookay," said Kirsh, backing off, holding his hands up in surrender. "But can I come too? You might need me to protect you little nerd hottie - uh, I mean reach for something on a top shelf for you? Open a sticky jar? Carry - something? I can be useful!"

He changed tactics hurriedly as Laura glared at him. She pointed silently but firmly towards the door. She still didn't know why he was suddenly hanging around them so much. Ugh. Didn't he have other people to harass? She turned back to Perry, ignoring him. He finally picked up Betty's things and left droopily, like a sad yet gigantic puppy dog. That was probably meaner than she needed to be. But she didn't have time to feel sorry for Kirsch.

"I don't see why we should wait till nightfall. Do we wait to nightfall to go to the library? No. I rest my case. Besides, nightfall was when Danny said I should go see Betty, she's at her calmest then."

"Laura, I mean this might be reaching but I think someone's bound to notice if we try and break into the oldest historical building in Silas in broad daylight - with a grappling hook!" said Perry, nervously tidying Laura's room again, putting all the things Laura had thrown out back into their boxes.

Perry was now so anxious by all the new scary information they'd just discovered, she was dusting all the books she found in a box under Laura's bed, making them all sneeze. Laura found time to hope she didn't look under the mattress where Laura kept her secret diary. Perry's style of invasive stress housekeeping was getting ridiculous.

"But it's safer in daylight," protested Laura. "I mean we don't know where Ca- the vampire is, but she's not even the worse thing we have to worry about. And I would rather not meet - the other thing we have to worry about in the dark. Again. Any time soon. Like ever."

Perry's face drained of colour.

"Wha- what do you mean?"

"So great, now what do we have to worry about?" asked Laf, "I mean, you got it all firsthand from the vampire's mouth, even through a dream - care to share?"

"Don't get me wrong, I know, I know she's an awful, homicidal, horrible vampire. We know she's the monster of Karnstein Hall. I know we have to find her, to get answers, but - I don't really ever want to see her again. Not in my dreams, not in real life. I -" Laura paused, swallowing hard, trying to get the words out "I  _hate_ her."

She almost whispered the words. It was hate that she felt, it was. That was all. She would try to find Carmilla, for the sake of Betty, for the sake of her friends, but that was all. Carmilla didn't care, no matter what pretty words she'd used. _I have been in love with no one, and never shall -._ Every lie has a piece of the truth in it.

Laura was silent for a long time,trembling with anger, with hurt, with something. Laf and Perry, stunned, not knowing how to take her words, waited for her to speak. Laura sighed heavily.

"But I know there's a far greater evil. The creepy woman Betty warned us about. Creepy is the least of it, you don't even want to know what it's like being in her presence. It's worse than having to attend a Town Hall meeting with the Dean. It's Carmilla's Mother. I think - I'm not sure but I think she's forcing Carmilla to -"

"Don't you think you might be a bit biased, crushes-on-vampires?" said Laf, "I mean, maybe she glamoured you. You'd say anything to save her. We have evidence that Carmilla is the monster of Karnstein, how much clearer can you get? We'll find her first and worry about the old lady later. She's gotta be stopped!"

"I don't have a crush on her! I don't want to save her. I just said she's the worst person in the world and I never want to see her again!" Laura burst out, incensed.

"Yeah okay," Laf agreed, "I take your point, L. I mean, hey, I get that it's tough out there, it's tough enough finding someone you really like, much less trying to find someone who just wants to kill you, but - and you're not going to like this _but_ \- you may be our best chance of finding her. I mean, she likes you. Apparently, a lot." LaFontaine stared significantly at Laura's neck. Laura covered her bite self-consciously.

"I dont think she does," said Laura, tiredly, massaging her temple and shading her eyes from them. "Not really. I was just another victim to her. Nothing special. Fresh blood. She made that - very clear." Laura leaned her elbows at her desk, her face in her hands. She felt so completely exhausted.

Perry suddenly sneezed and startled, they both turned to her. The discussion of murder, mayhem and vampires was making them all jumpy.

"Laura, um, what's this book?" asked Perry suddenly, holding up a dusty old book she'd got from the box. "I mean, I don't mean what it's about, I'm a German major after all, but -"

"Oh, that - I've had that since I was a little kid," said Laura, confused at the change of subject. "It belonged to my mother I think. She was Austrian. I mean that's kinda why I decided to go to Silas. I was having a really rough time at school and I think my dad gave it to me as a keepsake, it's got a lot of sentimental value. I think mom had a hard time at school too, being from a different country and all. I don't have that many things of hers."

Laura felt a little shy, explaining so many personal things about her life in one breath. She didn't talk about her mother often. She couldn't quite understand Perry's puzzled expression though. Perry was frowning in a way she couldn't read.

"I just wish I could read German, I'm so bad at it. I wanted something of hers close by to remind me of home, you know?" Laura continued, to fill in the awkward silence. Did Perry just really despise that book or something? Why was she looking like that?

"Huh," said Perry finally.

"Um, why do you ask?" Laura wondered curiously, apprehensively.

"Oh, uh, no reason," said Perry, opening the book up and holding it up for Laura to see, "I was just wondering why it says C. Karnstein on the fly leaf."

"What?!"

Laura, wide-eyed, positively snatched the book from her hands and Perry and Laf crowded around her. How had she never seen that before? But there it was, on the front leaf, faint but very much there, in a fine cursive hand, was the name _C. Karnstein_. What was it doing there?

Laura could hardly breathe. That memory came back to her like a sudden gust of hot air from an arid summer's day. Not the innocent time of her childhood with her father, when she thought he'd given her the book, but the much older, dream memory. With Carmilla. That day of waiting. That night of wanting.

Holding her breath, she lay the book's spine in her small hand and allowed it to open naturally. It fell open to the page with the colour plate Carmilla had shown her, of Undine and the knight in the forest, hiding from the storm, all those years ago. It was there where their hands lay side by side, almost touching. She could almost see Carmilla's slender fingertips there in her mind's eye, she could feel herself wanting to breach the gap between them and _touch_.

Someone had looked at that page so often the book could not fall any other way.

How could she have forgotten? How could she have missed all this? Throughout her childhood, in her naive childhood mythology, without asking, she'd assumed the book was her mother's and her father's. It spoke of care and comfort to her. It always had. The book was loved because it expressed love from its cover, from its spine, from its very pages.

She remembered now where it came from. And how strange it was that she could only recover these lost memories from her earlier life now, because she had dreamed of them just lately. It somehow made sense.

_Don't lose it. Keep it close to you. A present from a friend. Just remember that. Be brave. There's a whole world out there that's bigger than all the bullies at your school. Bigger than your small town. So, one day you'll make lots of friends, Peter Pan. You'll be good at that. Make sure you find all the lost girls, and hold onto them, tight. That's your job. Okay?_

Laura looked up at her friends with her now, always ready to help - she thought of her other friends, asleep and alone, being drained of their lifeforce. She thought of them until her eyes blurred. _Hold on_. How could she hold on? How could she? What did having this book, here in her hands, really mean? Her head was dizzy, trying to understand all the different, surprising, alarming, mysterious sides to Carmilla. _Damn you, Carmilla. What did you have to do this to me?_   _What did this mean?_

The colour drained from Laura's face as she recalled some other fleeting memory from her childhood. She turned to the back, heavy cover. Pressed there, almost flat, preserved perfectly, was the rose she thought she'd see, that she'd always thought was her mother's too, saved from a perfect day at summer's end.

The rose had a blackened spot of blood in the white heart of the flower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings!
> 
> I'm sorry to disappoint a few of you that Laura and Carmilla didn't meet in this chapter. They were initially going to meet, but then I split the chapter up so that the action would be a bit clearer. I just want to make sure the story makes sense and you had all the information you needed for it to make sense, so I had to delay their meeting a bit longer in chapter time (though not in story time).
> 
> I hope this doesn't cause you to abandon my story in disgust! *fingers crossed*


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to a rollercoaster ride. Buckle up everyone, hold on tight!
> 
> This is an extra long chapter. I'm too scared to break it up into two because I sense my imminent death if people don't see a certain vampire we all like.

Laura stared at the rose - her rose. She felt drawn to it, but its power had faded. Now it felt like a keepsake of a nostalgic time, tugging on her heartstrings.

None of this made any sense.

She slumped in her chair, the book in front of her, the rose laid on top of the page, her head between her hands. _What the hell did this mean? Think, Hollis, think!_ Perry and Laf sat on Betty's bed together, awkwardly waiting, exchanging looks.

Suddenly her head jerked up and she looked from side to side like some kind of meerkat.

"Oh! I am such an idiot!" Laura said, hanging onto her hair in frustration. "Argh! Perry, we're going to need that grappling hook pretty soon."

"But - Laura, we agreed not to go to the belltower until nightfall. And I'm even having second thoughts about that," Perry protested nervously.

"It's late afternoon, twilight will be here soon. Anyway, I'm not going to the belltower," said Laura, "Instead of searching for clues to find the vampire, I'm going to make the vampire come to us."

"You're offering yourself up as bait?" said Laf dubiously. "I mean I admire your slightly crazy dedication to this madcap scheme, L, and I'm not saying you have ulterior motives, but after what we've just heard, I'm not sure -"

"No! Well, maybe yes, but not the way you mean. I'm not going to sit somewhere like a virgin sacrifice waiting to be eaten by a vampire. But this rose -" Laura grabbed the vase, "this is Betty's rose. I'm pretty sure she got it from the same place I got mine," said Laura, laying her hand on the page next to her pressed rose.

"This is the charm, the dream charm we've been missing, I'm sure of it. This is how she got into my dreams."

Laf, who for some reaon still carried around that weird geiger counter they'd got from the Alchemy Club, immediately pulled it out for a scan. The energy levels went through the roof, beeping insanely in frantic warning. Their eyes widened in surprise.

"Yep, that's some kind of crazy magic ju-ju right there."

"Laura, I know we all need to do things at a time of - well, trouble - that we might not like, but I'm not sure I can break bounds out of campus without permission. I mean it's one thing to break into Student Records and creep on people's files but this -"

Both Laf and Laura gave her a look, but she shrugged.

"I follow the rules, it's what I do."

"You guys don't have to come along," said Laura firmly, holding up her flip phone, snapping it shut. "I've just texted Danny to come meet me at the Western Wall. Laf, maybe you and JP can take Betty's rose to your lab and see what else you can find out about it? Perry, maybe you could work on the map and see if you can pinpoint all the locations we've talked about? I've a feeling if we can at least see where the old Hall used to be, Mircalla's tomb, the cottage - they're all places we can investigate."

"That sounds like a plan!" said Laf enthusiastically. "I'm on it."

"I like having plans. Plans are good," Perry agreed. "Being able to stick to the rules if we possibly can would be better."

They both hurried out the door. At the door, Perry turned back, hesitating.

"Laura," Perry said, smiling ruefully, "I'm glad you're back."

"Thanks Perr," Laura smiled back, a little wanly, as Perry headed off.

It was all very well to be all action stations when people were looking, but on her own, she had to wonder - was she really doing the right thing? Within her so many competing forces were tearing her apart in so many directions. She absolutely did not want to see Carmilla again, yet she felt she couldn't live without seeing her again. It was the most frustrating thing to hate her with a passion and yet miss her all the same. It was painful either way and she didn't know which way was safer. But the time for safety was definitely over. What did it matter? Their lives were in danger, so it had to be done, someone had to do something. The questions whirled around Laura's head like flies circling carrion. If only, if only there was some kind of sign to direct her whether to forge ahead or to run and hide.

Just then, a phone rang. Weird. It wasn't hers. Confused, she rummaged around until she finally found the source on Betty's desk. It was an unidentified number.

"Uh, hello?" she answered tentatively.

"Hello, is that you Betty?" said a gruff, tobacco-lined voice.

"Uh, no this is her roommate, can I take a message?"

"This is her father, General Spielsdorf. Where's Betty?" the voice barked.

"Oh, hey, I mean, sir, yes sir, only the thing about Betty, she's come down with something, we're really worried, I -"

"Tell Bertha I'll be coming for a visit to Silas soon. With some of my harrumph - colleagues. When is the Jubilee set for exactly?"

"Sir, I don't - who's Bertha?"

"Never mind, let her know she should get ready to meet me at the Jubilee. I'll find out. Tell her to bring Grandma Rheinfeldt's jewelry box. Have you got all that, soldier?"

"Um, yes? But sir, about Betty -"

"General Spielsdorf over and out." The phone cut off abruptly.

Well. What the hell was that all about?

* * *

 

"What the hell is this?" said Danny, striding up to her at the Western Wall, shading her eyes from the orange glow of the setting sun. "Need help urgently, meet me at Western Wall, bring gardening shears?"

"Oh good, you're here," said Laura, struggling with the grappling hook, "could you?" The rope kept getting tangled in her feet whenever she tried to throw it, and it would only ever reach the tip of the wall before it fell down again. Laura would have to run for safety every time.

"You really need a lesson in subterfuge, Hollis," Danny said, rolling her eyes, "Are you actively trying to advertise where you are, because if so you're doing an excellent job." She took hold of the rope, swinging the hook clear, around and around with easy athleticism.

"Danny, can you just help me," said Laura through gritted teeth, "I can't help it if fate didn't give me the height advantage. I need. To try. And save. My friends." She climbed hand over hand, her feet searching for footholds on the stone wall.

"Laura, wait, let me do that first," warned Danny, but it was too late, Laura was sitting on the wall. It was hard to tell how steep the drop was on the other side, because of the undergrowth right by the wall. However, faint heart never won fair... answers to this mystery which had been driving her crazy for so long. Laura closed her eyes for a moment - and then dropped from the wall. She fell with a thud and a groan, rolling as she'd been taught to by her dad.

"Laura NO! Geez, are you completely crazy?" Danny chided from on top of the wall. She flung the rope over and slithered expertly down, unhooking the grappling iron. "You should have waited for me to get down so I can catch you, genius. God, Hollis."

"I was in a hurry," huffed Laura, her face scratched by brambles and limping a little. She winced.

"You could have seriously broken a foot, ugh. You stupid, impulsive, insane little hobbit, you're going to be the death of me, if you're not the death of yourself first." Danny was almost yelling in her panic and frustration for Laura, while she looped the rope arm over arm, tied it expertly and put it around her neck and shoulder.

"Okay, okay fine, Danny the champion of the world, shut it and let's get moving," said Laura impatiently, staring at the mini squiggle on the map Perry had drawn for her, before rotating the map around and around in confusion. "Well, I never had greatest sense of direction but this is ridiculous."

She pulled out a compass from her green canvas field bag, already bulging with odds and ends her father had given her. Without knowing it, he'd really prepared her for this. Spatula, check. Pepper spray. Check. Bear spray. Check. Vampire spray - Well, Dad couldn't be expected to foresee everything.

There was a wooden spoon she had tucked into a belt loop of her slim black jeans, reminding her of the dream she'd had. Running away, hand in hand with Carmilla, across the field, chased by dark figures. The end of it had split off when she dropped it on the floor earlier, and she thought the pointy end would probably come in handy if she ever came across any of those vampire minions again. It was the best kind of weapon she'd been able to come up with at short notice. She'd never staked a vampire before and she really didn't know how she would feel about doing it, but desperate times called for desperate kitchen implements.

She had a dark hoodie over a black tank top, deciding to opt out of Perry's collection of dark turtlenecks. She'd put her hair up in a serviceable but rather messy bun, and tucked it under a black knitted cap, a few strands escaping under the turned up brim. She'd refused Perry's offer to smear black gunk under her eyes for further night camouflage. Her tactical ninja outfit was thus complete, except in the late golden afternoon it kind of looked out of place and ridiculous.

Laura rubbed the back of her aching neck thoughtfully as she considered the compass. The new baby hairs growing at the nape of her neck felt like stubble for some reason, tickling her sensitive skin. She narrowed her eyes and pointed silently ahead of her, her fingers cocked into a gun, in a copy of what she thought would be army hand signals. Danny rolled her eyes, taking one long stride to each of Laura's two.

"Care to share why we just broke bounds, genius?" Danny asked a little witheringly, as they trudged along the side of the road, Laura limping only slightly.

"Uh, I need you to help me pick a flower, Danny," muttered Laura, as if it was obvious, hurrying to keep up with her with her lips set a little passive aggressively. She was aware of some sense of displeasure radiating from Danny, no matter how oblivious she was. "Can you just - help me?"

"Oh, of course, why did I even ask," Danny glanced over at her, her expression unreadable. "So you're going to bring flowers to your fang girl? Nice."

"Danny, what is with you? You're on my case all of a sudden," Laura said under her breath.

"It's fine, fine, I get it," said Danny, sounding reasonable, before exploding, "No, actually, I don't get it. I don't get why you're so obsessed with someone who tried to hurt you - who HAS hurt you. Who's hurt your friends." Laura opened her mouth to speak but Danny went on furiously, gesturing with her hands.

"And every time you need help, you call me, and I'm there. I'm here Laura. But I'm beginning to see that doesn't matter that much. Well it's fine, because, you know, if you want to throw over your friends, the people who care about you, for some bloodsucking psychopath that's your prerogative. I'm done."

"Danny," said Laura, her voice softening after her initial shock at Danny's words, "What are you saying? Of course you matter, you're my friend. I called you because you're my friend and we're in this together. I can depend on you, that's what I like about you."

Danny was silent. Laura sighed heavily.

"I don't want to fight by the side of the road, Danny. It's not about vampires or anyone being better than you. I like you, I really like you, as a friend. But I don't think we'd be good together as anything else," Laura looked at Danny carefully, "and you know, I think you don't think so either. It kind of sounds like you're mad at me because maybe you can't do anything to help - Elsie right now. Am I right?" She peered closely, trying to catch Danny's eye, who looked away.

"I don't know, Hollis," Danny said shortly. But she relented after a while. "Elsie completely - changed, but if it was because she was so sick - you should see them. My god. I just feel so helpless, and I let her go without doing anything, asking why, you know? I should have known, I should have done more. Then maybe she wouldn't be in this mess. I was a bad friend, I was a bad everything."

"You weren't, Danny, you weren't to know. Don't beat yourself up. I promise, we're going to get to the bottom of this." Laura put her arm on Danny's comfortingly, mutely asking her to keep walking.

"By bringing peace offerings to the Monster of Karnstein Hall?" asked Danny wryly, a little mollified, as they continued along the road.

"There's some enchantment with those roses Danny," Laura said determinedly, "Laf's geiger counter proved that. I think if I pick one, she has to come by and, um, tell me off," Laura finished awkwardly.

"Figures," Danny, joking lightly, "you would go for the bossy bad girls."

"I'm not," Laura protested. "It's just -"

"Methinks the lady doth protest too much," said Danny, "but at least let me pick the rose. Then she can yell at me, and if I happen to kill her with my bare hands, well, hey -"

"Danny, we're not killing anyone until we get some answers," Laura said firmly. "I have to do it, please," Laura continued in a low voice, "I need to."

Danny looked at her attentively as they walked along. The sun was starting to set, the sky full of crimson and grey. It was beautiful. Silas was a beautiful place, in all its weirdness. The thought of seeing her so soon, in the sunset, was making Laura's heart beat fast. What would she say? How would she react?

"Okay, Hollis. I hope you know what you're doing. But I'll help - against my better judgement, I'll add."

Laura suddenly put a hand on Danny's arm, stopping her.

"Wait. Danny, wait."

Laura looked up at the setting sun, the sky, the lay of the land. Was this it? It felt so familiar, she just had to close her eyes and imagine the sound of hooves, dashing down the road. Carmilla astride her black steed. She felt dizzy. She wasn't sure if she was ready, but there was no time left to prepare herself anymore. She had to be ready.

On one side were the trees, looming like shadow monsters by the side of the road. On the other, the green tangle of growth over the hedgerow. And the roses, there they were. Laura's heart beat faster as she caught sight of a lone white rose, rising out of the cloud of pink roses, high out of her reach.

"I think we're in the right place."

To her surprise, Danny had echoed those very words. Laura's eyes widened as Danny had stooped down to pick something off the ground.

In her hands lay a swiss army knife, tiny scissors projecting out of the base, a smear of some kind of rust on the blades. Engraved upon the red handle was the name: _E. A Spielsdorf_.

"Betty was here."

* * *

 

"Will, when I regain the use of my hands," Carmilla said with a clenched jaw, "I'm going to stake you. Twice."

"Hey, don't be like that. It wasn't like I did it on purpose!" Will protested, staying well out of reach. Carmilla was practically breathing smoke out of her ears.

"You did do it on purpose, numbnuts. And as usual, I took the fall for you. NOW I understand why Mother punished me again just after Paris. She thought she was one of my study buddies, didn't she? Because her Sweet William couldn't possibly do anything wrong, now could he? Why the hell did you give her Mother's ring, you idiot?" growled Carmilla.

"I didn't know it was one of your tithes, Kitty! Mother has so many and she's always complaining about how she's sick of you collecting baubles, so I thought, well, my girl Bertha wanted to go steady," Will finished lamely, "hey it was the 40s, that's what a fella did in those days. I was trying to blend in."

"Couldn't you have stolen something from somewhere else, you two-bit thug?"

"I didn't have time, I'd forgotten it was uh, our monthiversary."

Carmilla clapped a tired palm over her face, looking exhausted.

"So Einstein, you thought, hey, why don't I just take something from the Faerie Queen, her Majesty of Dark Magic's precious jewelry box. What could possibly go wrong? I mean, it's not like anything bad's ever happened when someone takes something that doesn't belong to them in any fairytale ever!"

"Why didn't she put it somewhere safer?! Geez, it was just a little one, a simple, plain silver band."

"That has Mother's real name engraved on the inside, you complete and utter knucklehead!" Carmilla pulled her hair in frustration, "And you know the appearance of things doesn't matter - it's the memory and the value behind it."

"Yeah well, there's no more sentimentality in that ring anymore," Will said shortly, "Mother made sure of that."

"Your little Bertha on the side, or whatever her name was, escaped, you said."

"Yeah. Yeah she did. I helped her get away, before anything could happen," Will stared in front of him without seeing anything, "But she went crazy before she left Silas. I don't know if it was the testing of some new vamp technology, but Mother did something to her. I don't know what."

"So you think her whiny golden-haired granddaughter is going to know any of that? It's a stretch."

"Well at least I'd know what happened to her," Will said, looking down at his shoes. "I just - I don't think Mother should get her hands on any information she doesn't need to know, you know? Come on, Carmilla."

Carmilla looked at him thoughtfully. It was another one of those times again. Maybe he just wanted to keep out of trouble, maybe he didn't actually care about this long-dead Betty of his. She didn't care, no she didn't. But a girl needed allies sometimes. Maybe having Will on her side could come in handy, if she could ever stop him from getting her in trouble for things she didn't do.

* * *

 

"Hollis, will you stop. Your damn. Wriggling!" Danny was desperately trying to keep her balance on the slippery ground, avoiding the thorny brambles at her feet. Laura was seated on her shoulders precariously, stretching and reaching without a regard to any solid foundation. "This isn't as easy as it looks so can you please take care - OOF!" Laura had somehow whipped her knee into Danny's face.

"I'm almost there, I can almost touch it," said Laura, almost pleading with the rose.

"I am getting a bad feeling about this," Danny started saying.

"Got it! Danny I got it!" said Laura triumphantly, pulling at the rose.

"Great, now can you snip it with the shears so we can get out of here or confront the vampire or whatever? I'm just getting a real bad feeling and it's not because I'm standing knee deep in a muddy ditch full of thorns with a wriggling shorty on my shoulders."

Laura took a deep and shuddering breath. This was it. Closing her eyes hard, her hands reached out to snip the rose.

A sudden gust of wind and some kind of black, hell-raising force snarled behind them in a ferocious growl. Before they could turn and orient themselves, some heavy thing had jumped onto Danny's back, forcefully toppling them both over into the thorny bushes. Danny groaned as somehow Laura had landed right on top of her, staring at Danny's pained face.

Another vicious snarl made her look up in surprise, and she saw an enormous black cat - or was it some kind of hell fiend of a panther, glare at her with something like hate in its eyes, before turning tail and speeding into the woods. It was a fearsome beast, but without thinking of the danger, frantic at the thought that she'd lose some clue to Carmilla's whereabouts, she quickly dashed up from the groaning Danny below her and chased after it.

Branches thrashed in her face as she ran. In the forest, it was a much darker place, with the sun going down every second.

"Wait! Wait," she panted, never ceasing to run. It was hopeless, no one could catch up to such a monster, a black flash of speed. She ran desperately after it anyway, her footsteps slowing little by little with each step. "Please," she begged breathlessly.

To her surprise, from out of the black shadow of the trees emerged the shape of the black beast, as large as a panther, maybe even larger. It stood there, eyeing her, sizing her up. Laura put her hands on her knees, panting hard, one hand still clutching the rose she'd picked. She caught her breath.

"Hey," she said shyly, holding out her hand, still panting, "hey cat."

The black beast took a slow step closer, considering her.

"Cat, hey cat," coaxed Laura in her gentlest voice, "Who do you belong to? Do you belong to, you know," Laura looked around her carefully and whispered, "Calm Liar?"

The creature padded slowly towards her, curious. Each step it took, closer and closer, it seemed to shrink from a huge, beastly hell fiend to the figure of a large cat. By the time it came to Laura, it was a mere kitten, shy and all over black fuzzy fur. It wasn't exactly timid as much as haughty. It stood against her legs as she knelt down, staring away from her, as if to ignore her, but hissed and arched its back as her hand hovered close as she tried to stroke it.

"Okay, okay," said Laura, "I can tell who you belong to, and it's not your fault." Laura soothed. "She has that effect on everyone."

It didn't make sense to be talking to a little black kitten in the middle of an enchanted forest, but Laura was passed caring what was crazy and what was sensible. It was just a good thing Perry wasn't here.

"But listen, I'm looking for her, if I follow you, can you bring me to her? Can you take me to your - uh, mistress?"

"Where are you?" Danny's voice hollered behind her. Danny's footsteps lumbered close, rustling the underbrush.

With a hiss and a growl, the cat fled, blending back into the shadows, just as Danny's tall figure came stumbling through. Laura's face fell into her hands in frustration. No Carmilla after all. No cat. And no clue.

"For god's sake, don't just run off like that, it's dangerous! I was scared for you," Danny said. She really sounded scared. "What was that?! What the hell was that?"

"I'm sorry," said Laura in a dull voice. "It was just a little kitty-cat." She gave a tired sigh.

"What? That thing was just a stray cat? So what, do we wait for vampire girl now that we have the rose?"

"No, I don't know. I didn't think that was how it was supposed to work. But maybe things have changed. I guess we'll have to go back to Plan A after all. I don't know what happens now."

"Well I have to go back to the infirmary," said Danny apologetically. "I guess this was worth a shot."

"I'll go with you, I want to see Betty. Let's go home Danny," Laura said, finding it hard to keep the heartbreaking disappointment from bubbling over. Her ears were ringing with the beating of her pulse, which was suddenly quickening. The distant sound of rumbling on the road, the leaves of the trees shaking, warned her in time.

"Danny, let's go, now. Now!"

* * *

 

When they entered the infirmary, Laura was almost bowed down by the heavy stench of something unreal and rotting in the air. She had to will herself not to be sick.

"What is that smell?" asked Laura, taken aback as though she had sidestepped a sudden punch to the gut.

"What smell?" asked Danny curiously.

"You don't smell that? It's like some kind of rotting, decaying rose smell, too sweet and sickly," Laura tried to explain, "Like some kind of slick, sticky evil smell -" It clicked. The smell was like being in the presence of the evil Queen, that creepy woman, Carmilla's Mother.

"I don't smell anything Laura, except disinfectant."

Why was that? Could Laura smell it because she'd experienced it before? Her skin crawled with the remembrance of fear as the smell hit her hard. She absentminded touched the rose to her nose, breathing in the fresh fragrance of the flower, the smell that reminded her of Carmilla. She didn't want to think of that, but it at least protected her from the evil stickiness that surrounded them. How strange that two smells were both so similar yet so different, one, young and fresh, and the other, old and decayed.

They reached Betty in her bed. Danny had gone off to see Elsie, but she'd not been exaggerating about the victims. Betty looked awful, as though her skin was now just hanging from her bones. She looked old. Youth was being sucked out of her. And with that evil smell touching her, surrounding her, it was no wonder.

As Laura got nearer, the rose seemed to part aside the waves of evil that were - yes, they were emanating from Betty herself. From Elsie, from all the others. The evil had rooted inside of them, pulling their goodness out until there was nothing left of them. Laura held the rose closer to Betty, who stirred slightly. Wide-eyed, Laura sat closer, holding the rose close.

"I'm so sorry Betty," Laura said regretfully, in her small voice, her heart in her throat. The sight of Betty lying there was bringing her close to tears. "I'm sorry she's doing this to you. I'm sorry this is happening."

Betty's breath was evening out, with the rose close by. This was good, something about the energy coming off the rose was helping. This was good. It was not much, but it was something. Wait, that was an idea. Laura quickly texted Laf to come by and drop off Betty's rose to her bedside. That done, she smoothed Betty's hair back with a gentle hand. To her horror, a small hank of hair came away from Betty's scalp. Laura dropped it with a yelp, her heart beating fast with the shock of it.

It was awful. All along, Betty had been suffering like this. She needed to girl the hell up now and do something about it. She set her jaw, determined.

"We'll get her, Betty, I swear. We'll find out what's doing this, and we'll make it stop. Okay? You just - you just have to hold on for us. We'll find her and we'll make her pay. Just hold on."

Laura stifled a scream as Betty's eyes opened far too wide, her eyeballs rolling back as though she had forgotten how to use them, her hand reaching out to grab Laura's wrist in a clawlike grip.

"Don't go to the tower, Laura," Betty said in a hoarse, hollow voice, struggling with the words. "Don't go below. Don't let that monster touch your face."

"Danny -! Betty, Betty, oh my god, Betty," Laura said frantically, "tell us, tell us what to do, what's happening? What should I do?" Laura pleaded tearfully. There was a slow beat as Laura strained to hear Betty's next words.

"Hollis," whispered Betty's exhausted, raspy tones, struggling with the words, "Never wear that striped top of yours again. Burn it. Please."

Her hand released Laura's wrist and she fell back to sleep. No amount of waving the rose under her nose got her to wake again, though her sleep was calmer. But as Laura stepped back in shock, shaking her head in disbelief at Betty's brief moment of consciousness, she saw that Betty's fingers had grabbed the bedclothes tightly. She was holding on.

Laura tried to take a breath and gasped instead. In that one split second, Laura had her friend back, her smart-mouthed roommate, the girl who didn't even belong. It was heartbreaking. It was so Betty to joke like that, when nothing else could be done, that it made Laura cry. She was crying as Danny came running up, crying as she explained what happened.

"I'm going to the belltower," she said, tears streaming down her face. "I have to."

"Hollis, Betty just warned you not to go there. Are you going to listen to every warning you get and do the complete opposite?"

"I have to go there. You can't come with me. I'm the only one who can make this right. It's the only thing we can do right now that will do anything. That place is important to this Jubilee thing, whatever it is. I need answers. I need to save Betty."

"For god's sake Laura, you're starting to sound like me," said Danny grumpily, "And I can totally see how annoying that can be. At least prepare yourself before you go in this time, for the love of Artemis. And no buts, we're coming to back you up, even if we don't go in ourselves. You're right that's it's probably too dangerous for all of us to break and enter. First sign of danger, you retreat, okay?"

* * *

 

Laura was ready. No ifs, no buts. Her heart was wrapped in a blanket, not allowed to interfere with what was coming, her friends were standing right by her side. They were just outside the belltower.

It looked a little different from how it had been in the past, in her dream. The boundary had been solidified somehow, with a more modern railing and fence around the perimeter. The churchyard, dotted over with old gravestones, was gone. The grass was still there, but manicured and trimmed in the superficial disguise of an ordinary campus lawn. The old belltower however, was just the same. Looming overhead like a giant, made of old stone and a devilishly dark ivy working its way through the cracks.

Innocent campus building? Not so much. Already they could feel the invisible force around it, pushing them gently but insistently away. A sign by the gate stated, unnecessarily, that due to construction and falling stonework, only authorized personnel was allowed on site. But the force field of magnetic repulsion was already enough to keep people out.

As if that wasn't enough, a quick test had already shown how useless the idea was of any of them entering in a group. Laura, holding the rose, was the only one who could push through.

"I just don't like the looks of this, Laura, are you sure?" Perry asked, uncertain. "I mean the last time you were here it wasn't exactly a picnic. Have you got everything? Bear spray?"

"Remember, this is your earpiece, L, don't drop it. So we'll be with you in spirit," Laf said, "I'll warn you if anything approaches."

"Hollis, be careful in there, please don't do anything crazy," said Danny, looking concerned. She considered this, looking dubious. "Please don't do anything TOO crazy. We'll be here to back you up. Gah, I can't believe I'm letting you do this."

"Hey nerd hottie, you didn't say I couldn't come along," said Kirsch, shrugging, "And I - I really wanna help out, so..."

Laura nodded. After seeing Betty, Elsie and SJ, she could understand his helplessness.

In a body, they all converged upon her in a giant hug. At first, it was comforting, but then as she realised she was one small person in a forest of armpits, she shook them off.

"Okay, okay!" she protested, "Gang -" she took a deep breath.

She checked and double-checked that the rose she'd attached to the inside of her hoodie was doing okay. It looked as fresh as if it had never been picked. She sniffed at its fragrance to remind herself of what she was about to go through. Pulling out her wooden spoon, clutching it in determination, she nodded.

"Gang, I'm going - in?"

It was more a question uttered in a nervous yelp than a battle cry, but it would have to do. She pushed aside the gate, which creaked on its hinges, and once more, she walked across the green of the dark belltower.

The atmosphere was heavy, the air was thick, as if there was the constant expectation of a storm. Carrying the rose with her, she could feel the air part aside for her, and though her feet felt leaden, it was not as bad as it had been in her dream. She slowly, softly took step after step. At the belltower, she lay her small, shaking hand against the worn wood of the heavy door, to her surprise, already ajar, and it opened silently, as though someone had just left and had intended to come back again. There was nothing more frightening than an unknown door left ajar, as though the occupants didn't care about any dangers to come.

Everything now that lay before her would be new.

"How's it looking L?" Laf's voice called in her ear. She jumped.

"Shh," she cautioned, as she turned down the volume.

"Fine so far."

"What do you see?"

In her dream, they had gone down into some cellar. It was not a place she wanted to go back to, though she knew she might have to, even without Betty's warning. Deep underground was where danger and darkness lay. First, she would rise to the top of the tower, to see what could be seen. If it was true that the bells had some kind of magical power to do with the Jubilee, that was what she'd have to investigate.

"Nothing, I'm going upstairs. Stop distracting me," she hissed.

Was the belltower empty? Would there be minions she'd have to fight? She held the spoon before her like a talisman and took her first silent steps up the winding stone staircase, into the dark. Her heart beat in her ears as adrenalin rushed through her.

"Uh, L -"

"Shh, it's nothing. Don't disturb her."

Laura frowned at the hushed voices in her earpiece. It sounded like Kirsch was talking.

"Bro? Is that -?"

 She shrugged it off.

Near the top of the tower, there was another door. She would have to open it to go any further. Taking a deep breath, panicking slightly, she pushed it open. It slid open silently to reveal darkness, with a small sliver of moonlight streaming in from a window.

In the dark, she could see a solitary figure standing by the narrow window looking out at the stars, a figure that looked oh so familiar in the set of her shoulders and her slim back, even in the shadow. Oh god. 

The figure turned. It was her, Laura was sure of it. Her heart beat fast enough to win some kind of world record. Everything was happening too quickly.

"Who the frilly hell are you?" the voice exclaimed in angry surprise. The figure took a step forward, hands clenched in fighting mode.

Without waiting to think, Laura advanced forward at the same time, her entire body, her pent up feelings of frustration, anger, hurt and hopeless heartbreak, all working on their own. Before anyone knew it, she had slammed Carmilla roughly against the stone wall, her hand keeping her there, the splintered end of her spoon directly above her heart. She knew Carmilla could feel that. She pushed, ever so slightly, her body pressed up against her, shivering with nerves, threatening all the force that her small but determined body had to give behind that one honest wooden spoon.

"L! Calling L, someone's coming, get out of there!" came Laf's muffled voice from her earpiece, as downstairs there was a muffled noise of footsteps, "L, can you read me? L?!" Laura winced at the high pitched sound.

The last words had come in a piercing, desperate call as downstairs there was the loud clang of the heavy wooden door, the clang of a bolt and crunch of a key as the lock settled into place. A fine sheen of sweat was raised on Laura's forehead. She was stuck in here, locked in, she was in for it now.

They eyed each other silently in the dim light of the moon streaming in from the window, neither of them giving an inch. The echoes of Carmilla's last words still hung in the air.

 _Who the frilly hell am I?_ Laura thought angrily, pushing against her, making herself felt.

"Guess I'm your new roommate, vampire," Laura hissed viciously, her head tilted close in mockery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings Not So Gentle Readers,
> 
> Some of you really like to crack the whip. I'm exhausted! My hands are shaking and I didn't even have to break in anywhere.
> 
> Enjoy, and let me know what you think in the comments if you like. :)


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura Hollis vs Carmilla Karnstein, WHO WILL WIN?
> 
> Featuring the oldest trick in the book: "How to trick a Canadian".
> 
> Warning: Krav Maga and angst involved. Hopefully things will get more lighthearted in following chapters.

"I don't know who the hell you think you are," Carmilla drawled languidly, seemingly unafraid by the pointy end of the wooden spoon right at her heart, "but do you always visit girls in their quarters, late at night, and put your hands on their chest?" She raised a fine eyebrow.

With a start, Laura looked down and realised that in the rush to capture her, her left hand pushing Carmilla back against the wall was dangerously close to an intimate area.

"That's quite the sinister hand you've got there," observed Carmilla calmly, with a hint of amusement.

Without thinking, Laura started to withdraw it slowly, uncertainly, blushing furiously as it brushed lightly against something small. Oh.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!" she said automatically, distracted for a moment by her embarrassment. Her right hand holding the spoon hesitated. That was all it took.

In a split second, her cheek was against the cold stone, her wrists pulled behind her back and their positions were reversed. Carmilla leaned her body against Laura's, trapping her, the wooden spoon now held in her hand between them. There was a strange, light jingle of silver bells as she moved, or was that in Laura's imagination?

"Oh I forgive you," said Carmilla lazily, plucking the spoon out of her grip as easily as plucking a flower. She threw it to the other side of the room where it fell with a light clatter.

"You - bitch!" Laura said, her voice muffled against the wall.

"Uh-uh, temper, temper, buttercup," came Carmilla's low, languid tones at her ear. "Now, tell me, strange little munchkin, to what do I owe the pleasure? Who are you and what are you doing here?"

"What?!"

Could it really be true? Did Carmilla in the real world not remember a thing? Laura's face paled, but she was in too sticky of a situation to ponder for long.

"Oh I'm sorry, have I forgotten your name? Did we study together?" asked Carmilla in amused tones. "I study with so many. I'm a popular girl. I'm sorry if I didn't recognize you, cutie. But if you visit a girl in the dark -"

"You don't remember me?" Laura said, indignantly. Her voice broke a little at her last word, and she felt a familiar pricking at her eyes. No, now was not the time. Remember the last time she was in the belltower. Be angry. Be furious. But -

"What's there to remember? We've never met." Carmilla's voice was low and harsh in her ear. Laura felt as though she'd been slapped.

Sensing that Laura was still attempting to struggle, Carmilla tightened her grip on Laura's wrists. There was that weird sound of silver bells again. Her strength was unbelievable. Supernatural. But Laura was now furious and she ignored her fear and pain.

"You're hurting me," she complained, a little petulantly. Carmilla loosened her grip the tiniest bit. An unexpected gentlewoman.

"I'll release you if you be a good little - "

Laura wasn't a student of krav maga and any number of other obscure martial arts for small people - for nothing. Her dad had signed her up for everything under the sun. No matter how strong your opponent, their strength can be used against them. With a twist she expertly slipped away from Carmilla's grasp and in another second had swept her legs from under her, until she fell with a painful thud to the ground, face down. Laura sat on her triumphantly, her knees pressing hard into Carmilla's arms.

"You enjoy the sound of your voice too much," Laura retorted, applying pressure as she felt Carmilla wriggle underneath her. She rubbed her own wrists, wincing and shaking the pain out of them.

"Listen, I don't want mess with a small but strange psychopath who just accosted me in my rooms but do you mind telling me why the frilly hell you're sitting on me in dark? I wouldn't ordinarily mind but I think we ought to be introduced first, don't you?"

"Don't you dare try and trick me again with your whole politeness trick you lying liar with all your lying lies!" Laura, pushed down harder on her knees and Carmilla groaned, expelling air.

"Charming. I can't - deny that - oof - I'm doing a lot of lying right now, cupcake, but correct me if I'm wrong here - you're the intruder. Don't think your defence would hold up in a court of law. Look, I'm sorry if I forgot some study session with you but if you want to indulge in foreplay can I suggest waltzing? It'd be far less mortifying to my ego."

"Argh!" Laura grunted unintelligibly in her throat. "You're disgusting! You're so frustrating! You've never been anything but frustrating! I don't know why I bother!"

"That makes - ow! - two of us. You're really not as light as you look, munchkin."

Laura rummaged around in her bag and brought out a small spray.

"Listen, you - you stupid vampire. I have pepper spray right here. I'm going to let you up but one false move and I spray you, got it?"

"If this is a robbery I'm afraid you're going to be pretty disappointed. I might have some empty wallets around here somewhere -"

"You're coming with me, and you're going to answer all my questions."

"Well if you wanted to play twenty questions why didn't you just -"

Laura clamped her free hand over Carmilla's mouth, none too gently, and too tightly for Carmilla to bite.

"Remember, pepper spray, right here in my hand. Not afraid to use it."

Laura got up carefully, pointing the nozzle at Carmilla's head, and backed away to the wall. Leaning down carefully, she picked up the fallen wooden spoon.

With superhuman speed, Carmilla was already right in front of her, the sound of silver bells jingling, holding her arms against the wall, the pepper spray and wooden spoon dangling uselessly from a height. Laura instinctively sprayed into the air and they both coughed.

"Nice try, but game over, cupcake. Care to spray again?" Carmilla slammed her wrist against the wall and the pepper spray fell to the floor.

Laura kicked her in the shins, screaming in frustration, and Carmilla howled in pain, doubling over.

"You little wildcat!"

But there was no time for that, because Laura had thrown a vicious punch - which Carmilla easily caught in her palm, with a jingle of bells, wrapped around Laura's small fist. It was no good. Carmilla was just too strong. And now Laura's hands were empty and pushed back against the wall, and Carmilla's limping leg leant against Laura for support. Her body pressed her into the wall and there was no chance of escape now. Laura gasped, feeling Carmilla's body slide completely against her, both of them panting slightly.

"You humans are ridiculous," Carmilla started to whisper into Laura's ear, before noticing the earpiece. She leaned in closer, curiously.

"L, can you hear us?" came the panicked voices from the piece, "we can't hear anything! L!" Carmilla looked puzzled, frowning.

"My friends know I'm here," Laura said staunchly. "There's no way you can escape if you do anything to me." She sounded braver than she felt.

"So they call you - Elle?" asked Carmilla, a little hesitantly, as though the name felt strange on her tongue. She shook her head slightly as if trying to remember something. Her face was close. Laura could feel her breath on her face. But she was silent, not wanting to answer, turning her head slightly away from her. This was not the time to feel anything for a vampire who didn't even know her.

Carmilla smiled then, a wide smile, baring her teeth, tilting her head back.

"Enchantée, what a pleasure. So delighted to meet you. I would shake your hand but a feisty little human wants to kill me so I kind of have my hands full right now." Her head nodded in a slight bow of exaggerated politeness.

"I don't want to kill you. I just have questions. Lots of questions. And you're coming with me to answer them. You have a lot to answer for, Dracu - Dracu- _loser_ ," Laura hissed angrily. Hurt was not even the word anymore, for how she felt. How could she have forgotten so easily? Carmilla laughed lightly.

"Oh? Well I'm impressed by your confidence if not by your terrible wordplay. Dracu-loser? Really?"

"You try coming up with banter when your life is in danger," Laura growled crossly.

"You certainly have a deathwish, sugar pie. It's tiresome. Didn't anyone ever tell you it's life-threatening to visit a vampire in her rooms, uninvited and alone? Not to mention rude."

Carmilla pushed Laura's arms up higher, and there was the slight jingle of bells again. Her face was close, temptingly close. Laura attempted a futile headbutt, but Carmilla drew back easily.

"Uh-uh, little wildcat. You try my patience. I don't know how you knew I was a vampire, cupcake, but I think it's pretty clear you're an idiot," Carmilla hissed out, with a sudden viciousness that was unexpected, "So I think I can be generous tonight and let you go, as long as you never come back here. Deal?"

"No deal! You're coming with me, vampire," Laura said firmly, pretending a confidence she didn't feel.

"Oh I don't think you understand," Carmilla said wearily, almost languidly, before enunciating her words clearly. "Get out! Get out now. Run."

She snarled furiously, showing her sharp fangs, pushing Laura away with great force. Her face was fearsome. There was a loud, angry, metallic jangling from somewhere. In sudden panic and fright, Laura ran, speeding her way to the door. She clattered more than halfway down the stone steps, breathing heavily when she realised that one, the door below her was barred, below that was the creepy cellar so there was no way out, and two, Carmilla for some reason had not bothered to come after her. Why?

She leaned against the curved wall of the tower, resting her head, calming her heart. In all her imaginings, somehow, she never thought that Carmilla would not know her. Had they really never met? Had she just forgotten? Was Laura - was she really so easy to forget? Laura was questioning so much. But it was true at least that she was a vampire, Laura had got that right. And what was she doing here in the belltower? Living here? Keeping a lookout for marauding Silas students?

Laura turned, taking a deep breath, and trudged back up the stairs. She couldn't keep giving into fear. Carmilla had hurt her yes, but she could have done so much worse. She hadn't. It was a slim chance, but Laura had taken worse chances before.

At the threshold, she pushed open the silent door. Carmilla was standing in the moonlight at the narrow window again, looking out at the stars. It reminded Laura of that air of simple melancholy, that night she had met Carmilla at her own grave.

"I thought I told you to run," Carmilla said in a low voice, her back to Laura.

"There isn't anywhere to run," said Laura, a little sadly, "I tried. I'm stuck until I finish this."

It meant so many things. She hoped Carmilla would understand that.

"This is a dangerous place, human. I told you to go. You _will_ be finished here, if that's what you're looking for. You really are a dimwit. You would do well to stay away," Carmilla said to the stars, shaking her head. She sighed.

"Come with me then, if it's so dangerous," said Laura impulsively, to Carmilla's back.

But Carmilla laughed then, like a stranger, for a long time, almost mockingly. Laura was disconcerted.

"I'm sorry," Carmilla laughed, wiping her eyes, "Oh my. That's - that's hilarious, buttercup. You mean from the frying pan to the fire or the fire to the frying pan? You know I would love to accompany a sassy little study buddy on a field trip at the point of a wooden spoon, sweetheart, but maybe you haven't noticed," Carmilla held up her wrists in the moonlight, "I'm a little tied up." She gave a choking laugh then, and Laura didn't know at all how to read that.

She saw now with confusion that there were silvery, almost transparent manacles on Carmilla's slender wrists. They were attached to slim chains which seemed to descend towards the ceiling, but in fact disappeared halfway up, invisible to the eye. Carmilla jangled like a myriad of silver bells every time she moved. Even in the moonlight they were faint, as though they came from some other place, not of the real world. She could move around the room, but no doubt, as soon as she tried to escape out the door, they would tighten and reign her in. Carmilla could never have chased her very far. Looking closer, Laura could see the red marks on Carmilla's wrists as she'd tried to pull them off. So she'd tried to escape before, unsuccessfully.

"Who is doing this to you?" Laura said in horror.

"You ask a lot of questions," Carmilla grumbled, rolling her eyes. "Who do you think, cupcake?"

It was an answer that gave away more than Carmilla had intended. It dawned on both their faces at the same time.

"So you do remember me," Laura said slowly and as evenly as she could, her voice shaking with fury.

Carmilla looked at her feet and didn't answer. The jangle of bells settled into silence.

Laura suddenly flung her wooden spoon across the room. It bounced off the stone wall, clattered close to Carmilla and she flinched.

"I hate you," Laura said in a low, heartbroken voice, sinking to her knees at the door, unable to stand it.

"I know," Carmilla said sadly.

* * *

 

They'd been sitting across the room from each other, staring at nothing, not speaking, for an hour. The air around them was heavy with feeling, with hurt, with expectations that could not be met.

Early on, still quivering with anger, Laura had stepped out into the stairwell to tell the others she was okay. They were panicked at the idea that she was in there with Carmilla, until she told them that Carmilla herself was a prisoner, and that there was no way she could escape herself until whoever had the key came and opened the door again. With that they had to be satisfied, because Laura switched off, just as they were randomly babbling on about Kirsch's friend Will for some reason.

Without making eye contact, she came back into the room and slid her back down against the wall. So there they sat in silence. Laura was stubborn. So many feelings were running through her head she felt like screaming and throwing every small object she could find in the room at Carmilla's head. Instead she sat still and waited for something to break.

Finally, during one of the moments when both Carmilla and Laura were sneaking glances at each other when they thought the other wasn't looking, their eyes snagged upon some invisible hook and they couldn't look away. They stared as though they'd been thirsty for cold, clear water for so long, and were only now coming upon some well in the desert. They drank their fill of each other.

Laura was starting to imagine that Carmilla's eyes had some soft, unreadable expression in them, and was preparing to harden her heart against being tricked again, when Carmilla broke the silence.

"If you're tired," Carmilla said tentatively, "you're welcome to take the bed. We'll figure out a way for you to escape in the morning when they come."

Laura looked over at the small, humble mattress on the cold wooden floor. In typical Carmilla fashion, it was messy, full of tangled blankets, twisted sheets, a winter coat for added warmth. There was no pillow, no cushion, nothing comforting to hold. It was a lonely, almost sordid scene. So this was where Carmilla spent her days, a prisoner under house arrest. For how long and for what reason? Why would Carmilla's Mother punish her like this? Yet another question that she wondered about. It all mixed together with emotions she didn't want to feel, anxiety about Betty and the other victims, fear for her own safety.

"I don't want to sleep," said Laura slowly, cautiously, "I can't sleep. I want to talk."

"Okay," Carmilla said softly, "so talk."

Laura sighed heavily. In the tussle, her knitted cap had fallen off, and now she released her messy bun and shook out her hair. She groaned in frustration as she ran her fingers through her golden brown locks and tugged at them. Her head fell onto her knees as she leaned against the wall. Carmilla looked at her with an unreadable expression. Laura balanced her chin on her knees.

"Why did you lie to me?" she said in a small voice.

"Now - hang on, Little Miss Jump to Conclusions, I didn't lie," Carmilla, a little too calmly, and far too jokingly for the kind of moment they were having, "not really. You'll see that -"

"You're a jerk. Stop. Stop playing around with words and tricking me like some kind of vampire defence lawyer. Stop lying to me," Laura exploded.

"Fine! Ask me a question and I'll tell you the truth, Nancy Drew."

"Fine. How long have we known each other?" asked Laura.

"That's - kind of a tricky question, cupcake," started Carmilla.

"Just answer the damn question, Carmilla, please, no more games," Laura pleaded, feeling exhausted.

"We met today, about an hour ago," Carmilla said evenly. She looked at Laura in the eye so she would know she wasn't lying.

"What?" said Laura in an uncertain voice. "If that's true, how do I remember so much about you? Were they all lies? Everything?"

"They were all dreams," Carmilla said gently, "None of it actually happened in real life."

"None of it?! Nothing?" said Laura, incredulous, "But they're my memories - they're my memories and they feel real. I remember them. You clearly remember me. Things happened, I know they did. How can you say that they aren't?"

"They weren't real, I'm sorry." Carmilla said, picking at the rips at the knees of her black jeans nervously. "I don't know what to tell you."

"So what, we never - we never kissed. Ever. We never touched each other. We never did any of that. I'm still a -" Laura whispered, her face reddening.

"Yes," Carmilla said in a low voice, very carefully. "You are. Exactly how you were and how you've always been before you met me. If you'd never barged in and met me today it wouldn't be any different. And that's how you will continue to be. How you choose to be. That's the way it is."

"I don't understand. You're lying to me," Laura held her head in her hands in utter confusion and hurt, "Why are you doing this? You're saying nothing had any meaning? Nothing at all? You broke my heart for no reason?" Laura wanted to cry.

Carmilla was silent. She was having her heart torn apart a second time and Carmilla was silent.

"I can't be in the same place as you right now."

Laura got up abruptly and left the room. She needed air, she needed to breathe, and she couldn't in there. She was suffocating. She ran down the steps, her bag thumping hard and loud against her hip, her heartbeat drumming in her ears. At the bottom of the barred door, she realised something. Something important, something that she'd forgotten. She walked back up the stairs slowly, every part of her heavy and aching. At each step, she considered what she was doing. Was it worth it? Was it really worth it? Did she really know what she was in for?

Carmilla was sitting with her back against the wall, her head lying back, staring vacantly out the window. Her knees were tucked up close. She looked like a tiny black ball, ready to roll into some kind of armoured defence if anyone hurt her. She was a mystery and Laura was always looking for answers.

Laura walked slowly towards her and knelt down before her. Carmilla looked at her with an unreadable expression. From her bag, she pulled out the book that Carmilla had given her, so long ago. The leather was worn from the touch of both their hands, at different times. So, across the years, they had talked to each other.

It was the proof that Carmilla had silently offered, the proof of love, no matter what came out of Carmilla's trickster mouth. Why that book, why go to the trouble of finding her, giving it to her, telling her to keep it close? It had to mean something. The thing with Carmilla, Laura was beginning to understand, was you couldn't get distracted by her words. She was always and ever speaking in a secret language you had to pay attention to first, because so much about her couldn't be spoken, couldn't be said out loud, even without the enchantments woven around her entire being forbidding her from explaining. And Laura, a girl of many words, was constantly being fooled by this.

What happened between them may not have been real, it may have been unreal, existing in an unreal world, but it was always and forever _true_. And it could never ever be false, never, as long as they both shared those memories. That had to mean something.

She knew now. She understood it. She placed it on the floor next to them.

Carmilla reached out tentatively, as though she couldn't help herself, couldn't believe what she was seeing, and touched the cover of the book with her fingertips, tracing the gold worked into the leather. Her lips parted as though she wanted to say something, but couldn't. Carmilla looked at the book for a long time and then finally looked at Laura.

"You are cruel," Laura said simply.

"Love will have its sacrifices," she said quietly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how people will take this chapter. It was a tricky one to write, because they have to come to a certain understanding but there's so much between them. But it is what it is.
> 
> Comments welcome!


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some answers for you all and Laura... and is Carmilla really as bad as she seems?

"I'm not asking for forgiveness. I don't expect that," Carmilla said finally, still hesitant, "But I suppose - I suppose it was something of - an apology. Atonement."

Carmilla's voice was hollow, and she looked anywhere but Laura's eyes as she answered to Laura's question. Carmilla's hand still lay on the book and she stared at it in wonderment, with a kind of suppressed joy. The light of the moon streamed in from the window, flooding them both with a strange glow.

Even to a person as oblivious as Laura, it was clear how much the book meant to Carmilla. It meant a great deal. What a sacrifice it must have been, to give it up, and give it up to a child Laura, who didn't yet understand, not knowing what would become of it. Laura as a child might have smeared peanut butter and jelly all over it, she might have ripped out the pages to make paper planes with, or thrown it out once she was tired of it. Anything could have happened. Yet Carmilla gave it up, she let go something that she loved, as though she had never expected to see it again. Why? It had to be proof of something. Perhaps loving something was as much about letting go as holding on.

A quick flick of her fingers and the book lay open, at just the right place. Carmilla's hand touched the page, tracing over the colour plate.

Laura lay her hand gently next to Carmilla's, repeating a memory from long ago.

"Was that all it was?" asked Laura, quiet and trembling inside. "Just an apology?"

The question smouldered between them. They could both feel the invisble crackle in the air, it was so charged.

When Laura touched Carmilla's fingers with hers, Carmilla withdrew her hand slowly with a stifled gasp.

She leaned back against the wall, looking out at the window again. They were both silent in the heaviness between them. Drawing a lighter from her pocket and frowning in thought, Carmilla played with it, lighting it over and over, before reaching across the floor for a couple of candles in jars that lay close. In the new glow of flickering candlelight mixed with the moonlight, Carmilla's face looked trickier than ever. There was something she was hiding.

It was some time before Carmilla responded, tangentially, of course, sidestepping what was important.

"Perhaps I didn't want you go away remembering just that last time," Carmilla said slowly, flicking the lighter flame daringly against the palm of her hand in a game of chicken with herself, her arms against her knees. Laura looked on anxiously at the hot flame against her skin. Uncertain, she traced the page in front of her absentmindedly.

Suddenly Carmilla tossed away the lighter, looking at Laura with some unreadable expression, and her hand slid forward to take Laura's, light and warm, pulling her up. Laura looked up, surprised.

"Come on, wildcat," said Carmilla, in a neutral voice.

"What are we doing? I don't want to fight anymore," said Laura in a tired voice. "I just want answers, please, Carmilla. Even if nothing is real anymore, please just -"

"I wouldn't dare," Carmilla laughed, "Not that my life is worth much. But I'll take that waltz now."

Laura raised an eyebrow.

"Right now, are you serious? You just tried to kill me and now you want to dance with me?"

"How you do like to exaggerate," Carmilla said dryly, placing Laura's hand on her shoulder, "I'm just ready for my close up now, Mr DeMille."

Tangling their fingers together, her arm slid around Laura's waist and pulled her gently closer. Laura tilted her head in confusion and skepticism, but inwardly her heart began beating faster. She bit her lip, looking down at their bodies, hovering close together.

"Don't think you can avoid my questions like this," Laura said, narrowing her eyes. Carmilla's body felt so close, it made her senses tingle. Laura once again was trying to regulate her own breathing.

"No," said Carmilla, easily, "but at least we can try and talk like civilized uh - people like this. Truce. You can hardly fight with me while we're waltzing. In 1698, it might as well have been sex." She smirked, lifting her eyebrows up cheekily.

Laura tried to let go, pushing her away, feeling peeved. Carmilla was - she was just so arrogant sometimes. Ugh.

"Uh-uh," said Carmilla, still smirking, pulling her suddenly closer, "the rule is you hold on and don't let go, okay? At least, if you want answers. I do my best talking this way."

"You say that a lot."

"Oh, so that's something you remember at least," Carmilla said, without explaining further. She twirled Laura around lightly and suddenly Laura felt the tiniest bit free, remembering riding with Carmilla into the wind. She fell back to earth in Carmilla's arms, a small secret smile teasing on her lips. Oh this was bad.

Carmilla felt warm and solid pressed right up against her, but then she moved away again to a respectable distance, and they started their dance again, slowly. Carmilla was graceful and Laura was awkward, but Carmilla didn't seem to mind, leading her gently through the motions. She laughed as though she hadn't a care in the world. The light, silvery jingle of Carmilla's chains followed them, lending a troubling reminder of her imprisonment to the whole dance. Laura was going to have a hard time thinking, which maybe was what Carmilla had intended in the first place. She was a trickster.

Carmilla continued the conversation as though they had never left off. She made them dance, slow and dreamlike in the flickering candlelight.

"You know, I wasn't at my best back then, in this belltower. I never am. It's an awful place. Things happened so quickly. It was - a shame. What happened." Her jaw clenched. She sighed, looking regretful. There was a note of something simmering below the surface of her voice. What was it?

"Then why, Carmilla," Laura's low voice was breaking, "If you know that, why did you have to hurt me, so badly? Why, in front of all those -"

Laura's voice was hoarse with the remembrance of that awful time, that terrifying time, expecting Carmilla's protection and getting only that cold, sneering look on her face. The betrayal. It all came rushing back. And now this. Atonement? Was that all it was?

Her hand tightened around Carmilla's fingers, squeezing hard. Carmilla let her. She didn't understand it and she needed desperately to understand. There was some sliver, some thin, breakable thread she had to tease out, untangle from this giant mess of a vampire girl. Still they moved and flowed as though they were made to dance together.

"Why did you bite me? Why did you attack me?" persisted Laura, not able to help her rising anger, "Was there any need for that? Adding injury to insult? Wasn't your cruel mockery enough for you? You _betrayed_ me. It was unforgiveable, Carmilla. You don't even know what you did to me and for what?! _What?!_ Even if it wasn't real, we had just - that night we had just - you broke my _heart_ -"

But Laura couldn't finish, her words all swallowed up by hurt. She closed her eyes, trying not to cry, and stopped dancing, trying to push Carmilla's arms away, too tired with hurt to do much more. This truce wasn't going to work. But Carmilla's arms were like stone, holding her even as they stood still.

A wall came down between them.

"What would you have preferred?" Carmilla said almost coldly and impersonally, "That you should hate me and escape or that I should watch my - watch you die right in front of me?"

The last words were almost a snarl as she looked away. But she didn't let go.

Oh.

"I -" Laura was speechless.

In all her anger, she'd forgotten that whatever had happened, whatever Carmilla had done to her, she _had_ escaped that nightmare, just at the right point. What a choice to make. Was it really true? In the silence, Laura - just didn't know what to say.

Her mouth opened and closed like a fish and when Carmilla suddenly looked up and caught her at it, she raised her eyebrows high. Laura clamped her mouth shut, feeling foolish. But the moment somehow served to diffuse the bristling anger that had arisen with Laura's words.

Carmilla sighed, running one hand through her unruly hair. She looked exhausted, shrugging in disbelief and shaking her head as though there was nothing to be done.

"Ugh! You are such a child. You know how to wake up from a dream super fast, genius?"

"Uh, set your alarm in advance?" Laura said lamely, scrunching up her face. Carmilla rolled her eyes. Was that a hint of - something in her eyes? A smile? A thaw?

Carmilla put her hand back on Laura's waist, and they began moving again to the sound of the chains.

"You turn it into a nightmare, sweetheart," Carmilla said dryly, her lips close to Laura's ear. Laura shivered.

"It's fear, okay? Anger, pain, danger. The works. That night we - when the car drove by, the night we were together - there were - good feelings - around." They exchanged another unreadable look. "And good feelings in the dream world means you feel safe, all warm and cosy in your very real bed and you start to forget - how dangerous the dream world can really be. You think the danger isn't real. Well the dream world might not be real but it can be just as deadly."

"So you're saying just because it's not real, doesn't mean it's not true." Laura slowly said in passing then, looking at her significantly. Suddenly she made Carmilla twirl underneath her fingertips, and Carmilla looked momentarily confused when they came back together. Laura raised her eyebrows, expecting an answer.

"You really don't let go when you want an answer do you?" Carmilla looked back at her coolly. But that was all she said about that. Laura sighed.

Some warm feeling was mixing up with the fear and anger inside her into a troubling concoction. Did Carmilla really save her? If so, Laura would have to rethink some things. How very like Carmilla to save her in the nastiest way possible.

"Listen, if you had any hope of me being on your side, because of what had happened between us, I wasn't sure you'd be able to make it out of that place, even with the bells ringing like fury. I was - I was afraid for you. Okay? So not that it matters anymore, but I had to do it." Carmilla explained patiently, but as though she didn't even care whether Laura believed her anymore.

"-but on a completely selfish note, I admit I needed your blood. You were fired up, little Pyro. Do you know how potent that is? I needed the strength to get away. It wasn't just about you anymore. I kind of had a few questions I needed answers for myself. There were bigger things at stake. There was my _life_."

Oh. Laura suddenly felt very small and very foolish. Breaking someone's heart seemed like such a tiny consideration now, in the face of death. Both of their deaths.

"And - did you get away?" Laura said, in a small voice.

Carmilla had taken her hand away from Laura's waist, hiding her face, whether out of exhaustion or something else, Laura couldn't tell. The fingers of her other hand tightened around Laura's small hand. They had stopped dancing and stood opposite each other, hand in hand.

"No," Carmilla said shortly. "My horse was killed, torn apart. No need to feel sorry for him, Calm Liar was never a fan of yours and he was always a bit of a stubborn beast." Carmilla's hunched shrug was the only sign that she cared deeply that he was gone.

"And I was captured. It seems I'm making a habit of being a prisoner in one way or another." Carmilla laughed mirthlessly, what Laura thought of as her crying laugh. The sound was grating to Laura's ears, no matter how sweet Carmilla's voice was.

"What- what happened to you?" Laura said, hesitant, her skin beginning to crawl. She knew, in her heart, she knew. But she didn't want to know. Oh god.

"You don't want to remember, do you? Well, that's nothing new," Carmilla said wryly. A note of careless amusement had entered her voice. "But you know, don't you? For over seventy years I was in there, until you - you found me. I don't know if I ever thanked you, but Sir Galahad, you sure had a gal's thanks that day." Carmilla nodded her head gracefully, in a mockery of royalty.

"Nice kind of reunion, eh, cupcake, meeting me at my coffin?" She smiled in self-mockery. "I like to go all out for my funerals. But please omit flowers."

Laura was shaking at this revelation. How awful. She didn't know where to look, turning this way and that, thinking, all the while never letting go of Carmilla's hand, still held tight as if they were ready to dance at any moment. Carmilla's eyes followed her.

Laura was full of a nervous energy, filled with fright from the memory of that time so long ago. It was frightening enough to have just the misty, unreal dream of seeing her in there. What would it have been like to be actually in there? It was no wonder Carmilla was so prickly and hard to deal with, thinking of the trauma she'd been through. Poor Carmilla. She made it difficult to like her sometimes, but no one deserved that, not even a monster. Laura looked at her then, her downcast expression, full of sardonic loneliness and amused resignation.

With an inaudible sigh, Laura couldn't help but fling herself at Carmilla, holding her tight, as though willing the memory to go away. Carmilla looked shocked, her eyebrows high, her hands raised and hovering uncertainly. It was some time before Carmilla tentatively placed her hands on Laura's back. When she began to hug back, Laura sighed. Carmilla's body was so real now, but seemed so frail in her arms.

"If it makes you feel any better, you weren't alone," Carmilla murmured into her hair, "I have bad luck with breaking hearts, even my own."

Stupid, stupid vampire. Laura clung to her. Laura would never understand what it was like, but she remembered the fetid smell of evil surrounding the coffin, the dark crimson ugliness of it all. Seventy years, buried underground, in that - that coffin of blood. Dear god. And Carmilla was still somehow functioning, still cracking jokes, still being a jerkface vampire. Laura breathed deeply, feeling sick. An image of Betty, lying in a coma amidst that sickly smell earlier that night flashed through her mind. The rose had helped, it definitely had.

Wait. Flowers. Of course. Laura pushed Carmilla away hurriedly, and Carmilla, surprised, let her go.

"Carmilla, I want you to see this," Laura said hurriedly, reaching up to unzip her hoodie. "I need to know what this is." She started to unzip, the zipper getting stuck midway in her impatience to open it.

"Hey now, whoa there pickles, this may be a truce, or whatever it is and I know we're kinda talking but I'm - I'm not ready for that just yet. I'm old-fashioned like that. Maybe later, cutie," she joked dryly, raising an eyebrow as high as it could go. "When I'm not, you know." She jingled her chained wrists lightly. "Unless you would like that." She smirked.

Laura's eyes narrowed and she gave an audible huff from her nostrils. The pity for Carmilla she'd so lately felt was starting to disappear under the weight of her wisecracks.

"You're contemptible," she said, her face scrunching up in annoyance. "Do you have to joke about everything? Right now?"

"Oh, I aim to please. That bunched up little face you make when you're angry is hilarious, buttercup." But Carmilla's amused gaze was tracking her every movement, sliding down with Laura's zipper. Laura's breath caught, much like her zipper, at Carmilla's interested stare. There was some new sense of openness now, and that could only be a good thing.

"What is this exactly?" Laura asked, as her hoodie unzipped and fell open. Carmilla breathed out audibly and then gave a small laugh.

"Uh, it looks like a rose, Sherlock. Gee, you really are a small-town girl, aren't you?"

Laura breathed out in frustration. She unpinned the rose, which was looking as fresh as when she first picked it, despite the recent struggles they'd just had in the tower room. She tossed it at Carmilla petulantly, a parody of a romantic gesture, who caught it expertly, hand against her chest.

The white rose lay there between her pale hand and black heart as though it belonged in that picture so completely. It was weird. Like the rose was somehow a part of Carmilla herself.

"Aw, for me? I didn't know you cared," Carmilla said sarcastically.

"Look, does everything have to be a snarky joke to you? Can we - can we please have no more lies, Carmilla? No more half-truths? No more creepy mysteries? I can't take it anymore," Laura said, exasperated, "I think it's time you told me your story, you stupid, smartass vampire. Your whole story. I need to know, don't you understand? I want to know when we really met, in whatever world it was. How did you get into my dreams, how - how - gah! -everything! But start with this rose. What does it do? What is it?"

Carmilla had picked up the long stemmed rose, twirling it around and around between her fingertips. With every word Laura uttered, her jaw clenched, her face frowned, and something like a furiously cold anger was simmering under the wisecracking surface. So much for the truce.

"Do you mind if I don't drag you through my painful past? Is that okay with you, Little Miss Sunshine? Do you think maybe, just maybe there was a reason I spoke to you in dreams instead of here in the real world?" Carmilla seemed to be at the point of explosion, but she contained it, wrapped in low, foreboding voice.

"Can you for once, just once, try and understand how dangerous this situation is? For you! Here, right now. You might not have noticed, but you're cooped up for the night with a caged vampire monster in this freaking creepy tower. And that's the least of it. The sooner you start remembering all the horrors of your dreams, and imagine them out here, the better off you'll be. Let me spell it out for you. It's not safe here. Really, really not. If something happens to you here in the real world, that's it! There's no rewind button, no second chances, no superman, no hero, Lois Lane freaking Junior! No one's going to get you out."

Carmilla's voice had risen, getting louder, and as she finished, the echoes of her words reverberated off the stone walls. _No one's going to get you out._ Laura looked at her thoughtfully. Carmilla's chest was rising and falling, almost as if she was feeling panic.

"Life's about chances, Carmilla. Real chances. Not everyone gets to take a test run in a dream world. I want to understand, you, everything. I want to take that chance, and it's my choice to do that," Laura said finally. "You can't keep hiding. You're the queen of mixed signals and you expect me to come when you call and go when you tell me to get lost, well, it doesn't work like that."

Laura drew closer, despite herself. Carmilla's eyes hooked onto Laura's, widening in surprise. Laura's hand reached out to touch Carmilla's cheek. It was cold, but suddenly warmth surrounded her fingertips. She caressed Carmilla's face lightly, a new softness in her eyes. Was it her imagination, or did Carmilla lean against her hand?

"Asking me to come find you, leaving me all these stupid hard to read clues. So that has to mean you want to be known. I don't know why you have to be so confusing. I don't want to play pin the trail on the vampire anymore, okay?" Laura said softly, staring at Carmilla. "Well I'm here, I've found you. So what now? Why do you keep running away from me?"

"I don't know, why don't you ask your girlfriend," Carmilla said coolly. She moved her head away from Laura's fingers, which hovered in midair, surprised. "Not that I care what you do in real life."

"What do you mean?" said Laura, confused.

"That giant red-headed step-ladder you were all over," Carmilla shrugged carelessly, "When you were busy taking something that didn't belong to you, thinking no one would see you two." She tossed the rose carelessly to the floor in front of them.

"Wait how do you know about that?" said Laura in surprise. "Your cat? Your cute little kitten? Where is she?" Laura was momentarily distracted, looking around.

"It's not cute!" Carmilla growled suddenly. "That's just rude. Talk about insult to injury."

"Don't be silly, she was adorable. A little haughty maybe but -" it slowly dawned on Laura. Carmilla looked down at her feet.

"Oh my god. Um, wow. Was that you? So - you're a cute little kitten - I mean a giant black cat, huh?" Laura laughed nervously at Carmilla's outraged expression.

"Shut up." Carmilla said grumpily. "Still doesn't change the fact you stole something that wasn't yours. It's not just a rose you know. I told you that."

"Carmilla. You told me - you said you had to come when someone picked a rose. That it was part of your enchantment. I'm sorry if it was against the rules but I wanted to find you, Carmilla, I wasn't trying to deflower you!"

At Laura's unintentional pun Carmilla looked up, raising a fine eyebrow as high as it would go. Laura blushed bright red.

"You know I don't mean deflower deflower -" Laura protested, embarrassed. Carmilla raised her eyebrow again, giving her a look, smirking annoyingly. _Grrr_.

"Oh shut up," Laura said crossly, as Carmilla hid a smile. "I meant, um - but how did you escape from the chains? I don't understand, I -"

Carmilla had shrugged noncommittally. She sat back down on the floor by the book. Her head leaned back against the wall with a thud.

"If I shapeshift into the form of a cat I can still fulfill my requirements," she said , "it's hard to stay a cat forever though. All enchantments have a price. As soon as I'm back to my true form I find myself - all tied up with nowhere to go." She jingled the chains mockingly. "Rings on my fingers and bells on my toes. Almost literally, some would say." Her hands reached for the book again, as if she couldn't help it. She opened it to the back, to see the pressed rose lying on the page.

Laura followed her, sliding down the wall as she sat down next to her.

"Well I'm sorry I took the rose. But what does it do?" Laura asked curiously. "You can have it back, I like the one you gave me better." She put her hand tentatively over Carmilla's, laying on the book. Carmilla left it there for a moment before she snatched her hand away, as though she'd been burnt. Laura's face flamed crimson. Rejected.

"You know I can't tell you much, especially out here," Carmilla said bitterly. "I keep warning you and you never listen. Just as well you took it and not your overgrown potato-fed girl. Because picking it comes with a penalty, not a very pleasant one. It's bait, okay? In a trap, for all the foolish mortals who walk by. Any time you find something you like in a strange, creepy place, you have to wonder - have I just fallen into a trap?" Carmilla looked at Laura significantly, and when she looked confused, she sighed.

"You heard the rhyme they made up about me. You steal a rose, you pay the price. I take something of value from you. I'm forced to. And then it goes to Mother Dearest. Sacrifice doesn't mean much if it's worthless, if it means nothing to you. And the most valuable things of all are those things we love the most. Things with sentimental value, memories - true love. I'll take it all. So if your ginger girlfriend had taken the rose, who knows what I might have done. I don't always get to choose." Carmilla's voice was harsh.

"And what would you have taken from me?" asked Laura, quietly. Love? She'd already given it up, to the one who would take it from her. Even if it had been in a dream. That time in the belltower, Carmilla's comments, it was all starting to make sense now, but how it fit into place with Carmilla's Mother and her insatiable greed for it, she was still trying to work out.

"Nothing," said Carmilla. "I don't want anything from you."

"Carmilla -"

"Even if you hadn't given it back, I wouldn't have taken anything," Carmilla said, in troubled tones, "because I stole something from you in the first place, so we're even, okay? Honour among thieves and all that jazz."

"What did you take?! What?!"

The chains jangled harshly as Carmilla took off a locket she'd been wearing around her neck. The necklace was a little blackened with age. She flicked open the locket smoothly, as though she'd been used to doing it often. Inside, Laura saw a soft, simple lock of her own hair. She gasped in shock, remembering earlier that day, feeling the short hairs at her neck.

"I should have asked first, but you wouldn't wake up," Carmilla sighed. "It was a thing you did in the Victorian era, if you were a fool. I wouldn't do it now. You can take it back if you want. I had it with me in the coffin, by chance. It - helped. I don't need it anymore." But she didn't sound convinced. She touched it with a light fingertip.

"What - what did you need it for? Why do you keep saying it doesn't matter anymore?" asked Laura, not knowing what to think.

Her mind was going a million miles an hour. Something about this, something about Carmilla's gloomy, hopeless manner, was thrilling her to her core, making her heart beat fast. The Victorians were weird. Romantic, but weird. And Carmilla was the weirdest of them all but - she liked her. She must like her, to do that. Here were all the clues that Carmilla did feel something, no matter how cruel she'd been. But why then was she pushing her away now? Why did she deny it?

"Nothing. It was just a stupid keepsake okay? Something to remember you by. I was a fool." Carmilla sounded flustered. "But it did come in handy when I had to find you in your dreams. You need - an anchor, you see? Some kind of fixed point. The rose, the locket, even the bite on your neck helped. It's possible to meet by chance in the dreamworld, but you have to be really lucky. If you really want to see someone, it only works if they want to see you too. So like I said, it doesn't matter anymore and you can take it back. You can do what you like in the real world, I don't care." Okay. What -

"Carmilla." No answer. Laura was getting impatient with Carmilla's broody vampire schtick.

"Carmilla, she's not my girlfriend," Laura said impatiently. "Danny's just a friend."

"An overly invested friend, right. Pretty caring friend to break out of this Silas hellhole prison with you."

"As a matter of fact yes, she is a caring friend. That's what friends do, that's what they are, Carmilla, don't you know that? Of course she is invested, we all are," Laura said fiercely. "Our friends are in danger, they're dying, they're having their lives sucked out of them little by little. And you know why. And you're going to tell me."

"Oh yeah?" was Carmilla's lame comeback. She sounded sheepish, awkward even. "I wouldn't know, I don't have time to bother with friends."

She sounded fierce herself, and suddenly, Laura was reminded of that first Carmilla of the past, the lonely, angry girl by the grave. Did Carmilla really not know what it was like to have close friends? Friends who you could count on? Her heart was filled with longing for the Carmilla of the past that she'd once known. This new girl with all her sharp angles and thorns, was defending herself as fiercely as she knew how, and inside, somewhere, the old Carmilla she knew was asleep.

"So your friends really call you Elle?" asked Carmilla suddenly. It was Laura's turn to look sheepish.

"Yes."

"Why did you tell me it wasn't your name?" asked Carmilla roughly, "I thought - I thought you'd lied to me. I thought you had betrayed me too. All this time I -"

"It isn't my name, it's my initial. The letter L," Laura said, ashamed suddenly. It was so simple a thing and yet - she'd accused Carmilla from hiding but she'd hidden all that time from Carmilla herself, out of fear.

"Ah," said Carmilla, a little broodily. "It just goes to show, we don't really know each other, do we, cupcake? It's a bit ridiculous, isn't it, you accusing me of not thinking things are real, of not knowing you, when you've never ever told me your name."

"Well you didn't tell me your real name," Laura answered back, the shame of her omissions making her sound fiercer than she intended. "I only found out because of that - that evil woman. So there, Mircalla, Countess Karnstein. Or is it Arcmilla? Millarca?"

"It's Carmilla," Carmilla said through gritted teeth. "I told you my real name. It's Carmilla, it always will be Carmilla, because that's the name you called me by when I was at my happiest." She folded her arms angrily, staring out the window in a black mood.

Oh. Carmilla seemed to be winning every argument now. Laura didn't know what to say. All her objections seemed to be so petty. Carmilla wasn't off the hook for a lot of what she'd done, she was definitely no hero, but neither was she a villain.

"Oh, Carmilla," Laura whispered, hesitating over the sounds, feeling them on her tongue. _When she was happiest._ What a stupid, romantic thing to say to her, just when they had their claws out and were fighting each other. Stupid Carmilla. She wasn't fair. Laura felt all warm and tingly inside. She had liked her, at least once upon a time. It went a long way to healing what had been broken inside of Laura, all this time.

Laura called her name again, gently. Carmilla turned, frowning slightly, caught in Laura's soft gaze. Laura wanted to touch her, she wanted to hold her. She leaned in closer. Her fingers reached out, tucking Carmilla's dark hair back behind her ears. Her breath caught at Carmilla's ethereal loveliness, feeling her lean slightly against her hand, sighing. Without realizing what she was doing, her face inched slowly closer, lips parted. She could feel Carmilla lean towards her too, her eyes closing slowly, looking dazed. Laura felt dazed herself, and soon she could feel their warm breath flowing over each other, they were so close. The tips of their noses touched lightly, their eyes opened to look at each other, and she stared, mesmerized by Carmilla's fine, dark eyes, until -

"Don't," whispered Carmilla, her eyes bright with something, shining in the warm glow of candlelight. Uncertain, Laura drew back. There was a pause.

"You think you know me, but you don't," Carmilla said, her eyes glittering. "And I don't know you either."

"Well I'll tell you my name now," Laura said awkwardly, placatingly. She felt deflated, the moment felt deflated. But Carmilla looked disbelieving.

"Forget it, I don't need to know anymore," Carmilla retorted abruptly. "Ask me that question again, the first one."

"Which one?" asked Laura, confused. Her heart was sinking at Carmilla's mixed signals, blowing so hot and cold all at once. "How long have we known each other?"

"Probably forever," said Carmilla, "give or take a few years. Sometimes I'm prone to exaggeration. Sometimes I forget myself, but mostly I remember. Lucky, lucky me."

"So you admit now, you remember everything I remember?" Laura demanded, feeling vindicated and a little exasperated. Why was Carmilla so stubborn and so - ugh!

"Sweetheart, I remember more than you remember. I remember almost everything. It's you that's forgotten me. So many times. So you'll excuse me if I don't care anymore, if I don't jump for joy that you've found me."

"What have I forgotten?" demanded Laura unreasonably. "What do you mean?"

"Ah, that's a question for a philosophy major. Luckily, I am one. We could spend countless years wondering what you've forgotten but I'll keep it short - my guess is, quite a lot."

"What - what does this mean? What do you mean? Tell me!" Laura was confused, her head was spinning. Forget Carmilla? She'd forgotten some things sure, the dreams were so hazy, but what else could Carmilla mean?

"Nothing that happened between us was real, _Elle_ ," Carmilla said simply, "I was telling the truth, even if you don't want to hear it. But you're right too. It's true that we share some of the same memories now, so they seem real to us. But they never ever happened. We don't know each other. I asked your name often enough, in the dreamworld, where it was safe, and you didn't want me to know. So okay, have it your way. But don't accuse me of pretending not to know you when you won't let me know you." Carmilla picked at the threads at her jeans, torn at the knees. "Fine. Now I don't want to know, not here, not now. There's nowhere to go from here. So, hey, look at us, two crazy, mixed up kids in a halfway place again, where nothing ever works out." She gave a short laugh.

She got up lightly and stood by the window looking out. The night had changed. Sunrise would soon come. Laura followed her, feeling the cool, cold breeze flow into the room. She shivered and without being able to help it, drew closer to Carmilla, who for a change, didn't move away. Carmilla, immoveable, flicked her eyes downward to glance at Laura, whose head was bowed, looking down at the darkness.

"My name is Laura Hollis," she said, "I'm a freshman at Silas and I live in room 307 at Silas House. So you see, I really do want to know you. I want to know you in the real world, not just in a dream." The light outside was becoming grey. She could almost see the ground below them now.

Carmilla ran a hand through her hair, her eyes wide and her face looking shocked and scared as hell.

"Are you an idiot?" she said angrily. Well. That was really not the response Laura had expected. "What kind of dimwit comes to a creepy tower with a monster in it and just blurts out their real name?! I just told you it's not safe here and you give me your name NOW?! Hell's bells, cupcake!"

"But -" Laura protested, quailing inside. Had she really - what had she done?

"Wait - Room 307?" Carmilla started laughing, shaking her head in amusement. Ookay. What was going on now? "All this time, I've been looking for you, searching high and low, and you were supposed to be my roommate this whole time? Oh this is great. This is super. I'm looking forward to Mother Dearest kicking herself."

Carmilla laughed uproariously, as though she'd never heard of anything so funny. Her hands covered her face and the chains began to jangle with her shaking shoulders.

"Oh god," Carmilla said, laughing fit to be killed. "I'm sorry - I'm sorry it had to end this way."

"What?" asked Laura, confused by what was happening. Carmilla's laughter and the jangling chains and her severe lack of sleep - everything was confusing her. Carmilla looked at her, her laughter finally dying down.

"God, you're unbelievably lovely," Carmilla said suddenly, in a low murmur, shaking her head lightly. Her fingers trailed along Laura's jawline. "I wish -"

Laura let out a slow, shuddering breath. Impulsively, Carmilla leaned in and gave her a slow, gentle kiss on the forehead. Her eyes were troubled and soft as she looked at Laura. The sun was slowly starting to rise. The kiss tingled on Laura's skin, even after Carmilla's lips had left her. What was happening?

"Well goodbye, Laura Hollis," Carmilla whispered suddenly. "It was nice to meet you finally."

Behind her, Laura heard the door open, abruptly, but before she could turn, a flash sped towards them and a strong hand clamped over her mouth so she couldn't scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, gentle readers!
> 
> I'm sorry for the delay, I had to rewrite this update a couple of times. Still not that happy with it, but feel free to let me know what you think!
> 
> Sorry about the length of this chapter, thanks for reading!


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens!
> 
> I fear this is not what people want, but the story must go on.

"Well, well, if it isn't Kirsch's little nerd hottie crush," smirked a voice behind Laura.

_Oh no._ She knew that voice, it was Kirsch's friend Will from the Zetas, a complete jerk, sly and secretive where Kirsch was an open kind of puppy dog. So that's what her friends had been trying to warn her of. Will - a vampire. It all made sense, he was notorious for bullying pre-med students, especially when they were carrying medical coolers full of fresh blood. God, how many vampires went to Silas?

It was a good thing these vampire bad guys all loved the sound of their own voices. Laura didn't wait for second chances. In that split second she slipped downward, biting his hand over her mouth and elbowed him in the groin, hard.

"Yow!" Will yelped in a high-pitched voice. "You little -" his voice was too strangled to say anymore.

Laura stamped down hard on his foot and wrenched her way free, pushing him off, almost stumbling at the momentum. This was frustrating beyond belief. Was it just her or did fate always have a way of interrupting them, always at the - well - fateful moment? Just for once, she wanted Carmilla to herself without so many deadly interruptions.

She turned on a dime, feeling the adrenalin rush through her veins; she put her whole angry, frustrated force into her fist and punched him hard. Will doubled over with the unexpected pain, groaning.

Laura ran across the room picking up stray objects and throwing at him as he limped forward advancing menacingly. His face was murderous, fearsome.

"Don't think you can get the best of me, little nerd, this isn't your grandma's lit class," Will threatened. But every stupid word out of his mouth made her bolder.

"Lame," Laura jeered, throwing everything she could at him. "Did you get your jokes from your grandma as well?"

His expression was fierce and furious at this, and inwardly, she was afraid. Anyone would be. But it didn't do to show it. An appearance of confidence, especially if you were a tiny little dynamo, was half the battle.

"Ouch!" Will yelled, ducking as she threw a chair and only narrowly avoiding one of the wooden legs at his chest. "You're going to pay for that!" He fumed, clenching his large fists.

Meanwhile, Carmilla's momentarily stunned face at his sudden appearance had settled into hilarity as she started laughing, as though she simply couldn't contain it any longer, after a night of angst and unresolved tension. Laura couldn't figure out who she was laughing at. They both turned to her at the sound of her amused laughter.

"Are you just going to stand there and let her do this?" asked Will, exasperated, in between gesturing and shielding his face with his hands as Laura threatened to throw yet another item.

"Are you just going to stand there and let him do this?" Laura asked at the same time, pointing at Will.

They turned slowly and looked at each other from across the room, surprised, then turned back to Carmilla, who was leaning against the window sill, arms crossed, observing them languidly, with amusement. She shrugged carelessly.

"Hey don't look at me, I'm a prisoner here, just enjoying what fun I can from the discomforts of my prison cell. I just wish I had some popcorn," she smiled insincerely, jangling her invisible chains, as they both stared at her hard, demandingly. "Oh please, you guys are doing fine without me," she encouraged them, laughing to herself, waving her hands for them to continue. The chains jingled happily. "Keep going. I want to see how it ends."

Gah, Carmilla was so infuriating! Fine, she'd do this on her own.

Laura turned back in time to see Will advance threateningly, and started throwing things at him again. As he reached her, she kicked him in the shins, hearing his howls of anguish with satisfaction. As he loomed over her, she drew her hand from behind her back and sprayed him with the pepper spray she'd picked up. _Boom! Thank you Dad, and I will never complain about your self-defence care packages again._

But even a feisty little human who was girling the hell up with the best of them was no match for an unchained vampire in peak condition who had a habit of stealing fresh blood from premed students. Will, blinking blindly and crying from being pepper sprayed, had finally had enough, zipping close to capture Laura and pin back her arms as he shook his face, trying to get clear of the spray's effects, snarling.

Carmilla had steered clear of them both, walking aimlessly around the edge of the room, picking her room back up.

"Ow, you're hurting me!" Laura complained, spitting out the words angrily. Will laughed horribly.

"That's the whole idea, sugar," he said, laughing yet crying at the same time, "Don't think that damsel in distress act is going to work on me like I'm sure it does on tender-hearted Kitty here."

"Oh, I'm not tender-hearted," Carmilla said languidly. "Just lazy."

Will laughed, with an evil leer on his face, made just that much worse by his reddening eyes and runny nose.

"Carmilla!" Laura pleaded, her voice tight with fear and pain, as Will pulled her arms back roughly.

"Enough," said Carmilla lazily, and suddenly she was right next to them, holding Laura's wooden spoon against Will's heart, pointy end pressing hard against his chest. "Let her go."

"What the -"

"I said, let her go, you don't want her," Carmilla said evenly, as though she was reciting a shopping list she didn't have much interest in.

"Hey, what the hell is this Kitty? Dude, you know what my orders are. You know what Mother'll say if I don't take her, what she'll do to me. And you'll comply, if you know what's good for you. You're the prisoner here, don't forget it. So just put. The goddamn. Spoon. Down." Will suddenly looked puzzled, narrowing his eyes. "I can't believe I just said that."

"She's not the one, Will. Let her go. She's -" Carmilla hesitated, chewing on her lip.

This was just like before. The memory of it came flooding back to her. Laura scrunched her eyes up, waiting to hear it. _She's nothing, she's worthless, she's just a filthy human._

"She's - she's just a friend, okay Will?" Carmilla bit her lip, thinking. Just a friend? Really? Well, it was a start and it was better than being nothing. "An overly enthusiastic, overly invested, caring sort of - friend. Who finds it hard letting go sometimes." Carmilla smiled a rueful smile to herself. "You know the kind."

Carmilla rolled her eyes quickly at Will, almost conspiratorially. Laura spluttered in protest, before stopping abruptly, swallowing hard, as she felt Carmilla place her gentle palm on Laura's front, where she felt most vulnerable. With how close Carmilla was to both of them, holding the wooden spoon firmly against his chest, Will couldn't see a thing, and neither could Laura. But she felt it. She felt Carmilla's thumb stroking in lazy circles, comforting, warning her to play along. She stood still, she tried. But it made her shiver. Carmilla didn't know what she was doing to her. Or maybe she did.

"You know you owe me," Carmilla was saying carelessly, "I'm calling in that favour now. You know what I can do, what I know, okay? No one knows she's here, except you. Let's keep it that way." Carmilla pressed the spoon in a little harder. Will broke out in a sweat, Laura could feel his hands getting clammy.

"Yeah right - do you know how many idiots I just had to fight off just to get here? A bunch of dumb gingers and that dimbro Kirsch. So I'd say, yeah, people know she's here."

"I mean Mother and her minions, you lackwit."

Will paused as he considered this.

"Just a friend huh? Thought you were too good for friends?" Will jeered, trying to act macho. "Where did you pick this one up? You and your study-buddies, I can't believe even locked up you manage to find them. Don't tell me the stone-hearted Carmilla is actually getting to _like_ people? Dude, like how did she even get in here?"

"Are you done whining about your inadequate security measures?" Carmilla said impatiently. "Are you going to do as I say or are you going to take the high road to hell? You do realize I have nothing to lose here. It's your fault I'm in here, Willy boy, why shouldn't you be the one to get me out, one way or another."

Will gulped as Carmilla pushed in a little firmer.

"I - I don't know Kitty, you know it's just a matter of time. Mother will find out, she always does. You know that. And where does that leave me? Uh - hey, not so hard there -"

"Fine, so give me that time. I'm tired of being bait for Mother's stupid little cat and mouse games, okay? Just give me that much," Carmilla breathed out, trying to contain her impatient anger, "And as for where that leaves you, I'd say a helluva lot better than if I tell her about the little matter of Blondie Spielsdorf and your little thing on the side with her grandma."

Laura's reporter's ears pricked up. Betty? What was this about Betty? And whoa, hold the front page, what? Grandma?

"So you really have a thing for grandmas, huh?" Laura said, musingly. Carmilla shrugged and nodded at Laura's fair point.

"Shut up, shorty!" Will growled, "She wasn't a grandma when I knew her. She was the most beautiful - ugh, just shut up!"

Will's eyes moved, thinking fast, as if he was going over all the options in his head.

"You're lucky I know your type by now, Kitty," he sneered, "After all the study buddies I've seen you with, I'd be hella surprised if you picked up this mousy-haired midget for your one and only -"

"Hey! -" Laura protested. But Carmilla's hand pressed against Laura's front again and she fell silent.

"- Duh, of course I know she's not the one - that's the only reason I'm playing along, not cause I'm scared of your lame spoonfed - whoa, geez - spoonfed threats, Kitty. I'm a peaceful guy -" Carmilla snorted at this "- and I don't see any need for unnecessary violence. At least, not this early in the morning." He flicked his floppy dark hair back in an attempt to be nonchalant.

What did that mean? What did Will mean, Carmilla's one and only? Laura closed her eyes. What did that mean, that she wasn't the one? Just how many study-buddies did Carmilla really have? Laura didn't know what to think, but she was being slowly eaten away by a rising jealousy she'd never felt before. Maybe all this time, with everything that had happened - Carmilla hadn't done it for her after all. She was just convenient.

Carmilla was cocking her head at Will and motioned him away silently.

Will glared furiously at Carmilla, but then he quickly released Laura, raising his hands clear with a mocking expression on his face. Without thinking, Laura dashed behind Carmilla for protection, who stood casually in her ripped black jeans and black top, a red plaid shirt tied around her waist, twirling the wooden spoon between her fingers like a drumstick, as though she wasn't afraid of a single thing. God she was so - wow -

She raised an eyebrow at Will, who backed away further, before she glanced down at Laura huddling behind her.

"Uh, your hand is on my butt there, McTouchypants," she drawled in a low voice.

"Oh, god, I'm so sorry," said Laura, flustered, clinging a bit higher up. Carmilla sighed heavily and looked up at the ceiling.

Will, who had been drying his watering eyes with the hem of his black tshirt, was now looking curiously at the both of them and their weird little interactions. He frowned, side-eying them.

"Just friends, huh? Are you - are you two," he said, pointing a finger from one to the other over and over.

"No!" Carmilla and Laura answered in unison, before glaring at each other for answering so quickly. Laura came from behind Carmilla and they stood apart, fuming at each other.

"Are you sure, because it sure looks like -" Will pointed fingers, trying to figure them out.

"She hates me," Carmilla smiled sardonically, with no humour in it whatsover. "She said so often enough tonight. You know study-buddies." Laura looked at her, furious, but Carmilla didn't meet her eyes.

Will shook his head, not really caring.

"Okay, whatever, weirdos. I just came here to remind you about the bells, Kitty. It's been dawn for a while and now I see you've been messing around with -"

"We have _not_ been fooling around!" Carmilla and Laura protested in one voice, before glaring at each other again. Will rolled his eyes, ignoring them.

"You - know - what- I - mean." Will spoke to Carmilla carefully through gritted teeth, his lips tightening and eyes widening, semi-secretly pointing at Laura behind his hand as if to keep her from knowing. "Mother was pretty furious when they didn't go for 3 days straight. I'm sure you don't want that to happen again." He smirked at the memory, cracking his knuckles threateningly and raising his eyebrows at Carmilla. She rolled her eyes at this.

Laura had another thing to wonder about. Bells? They were in the belltower, sure, but what did the bells have to do with Carmilla? After all, she was chained, a prisoner. What did she have to do? This was all just so confusing. Question after question she'd have to pin Carmilla down for - uh - ask her for answers.

"Mother can kiss my vampire a-" Carmilla started.

"Kitty!" Will protested, "Don't make me be the bad guy here, all right? I'm just delivering a message. Why can't we all just get along? Just - play the game, Kitty!"

"Hate to break it to you, Willy boy, but you _are_ the bad guy," Carmilla said witheringly. "But speaking of deliveries, do me a favour and take this small human package outside the field where she won't do any more harm to herself?"

"What?!" Laura said furiously. "What the hell, Carmilla?!" 

"So now I have to clean your study-buddy messes up? Is this what this is? Great. Just great. Any more coming out of the woodwork, just so I can get a heads up?" Will said sarcastically.

Carmilla shrugged.

"Carmilla - you can't just do this. What do you think you're doing? We're not done. I'm not leaving."

"You heard me, buttercup. Willy boy here is going to take you home, where it's nice and safe and cosy," Carmilla turned to the window, looking out at the sunrise. Her voice turned low and menacing. "And Will - I'll know if you've done something you shouldn't. You'd better keep her safe - she needs all the help she can get."

"How dare you?!" Laura spluttered, incensed. "Don't tell me what to do. You're not the boss of me, Carmilla!" Will frowned again.

"Are you sure you two - you two aren't," Will asked suspiciously, pointing at each of them in turn with a flick of his fingers.

"NO!" Carmilla and Laura shouted in unison. Will raised his hands up in mock surrender.

"You can't just get rid of me when you want. I'm not going. I need answers!" Laura said angrily, "You stupid, frustrating, obnoxious, contemptible - ugh! I could cheerfully strangle you right now. We're not done Carmilla Jerkface Karnstein!"

She rushed towards Carmilla, grabbing onto her wrist, pulling her, managing, in that split second, to close something small into the palm of Carmilla's hand before Will caught her.

"Let me go, you jerk!" Laura pulled away. "Carmilla!"

"Goodbye, cupcake," said Carmilla, in a low voice, moving away easily. Her back was turned towards them both, and she didn't bother to turn around. Laura started for her again, intending to pull her round by the shoulder, to look her in the face, but Will caught her by the arm.

"Ookay, all right, come on lover nerd, no more poking the bear in the cage. Time to get you back to your Harry Potter figurines or whatever." But Laura was struggling again.

"Ow! Carmilla!" Laura pleaded.

But Carmilla didn't respond. Her shoulders slumped somehow in defeat, there by the brightening window, the last Laura saw of her.

By pinching her shoulder hard and then grabbing onto her arms, Will frogmarched her quickly down the spiral staircase of the belltower and out the door. He kicked the heavy door behind them with a slam.

* * *

"Let go of me," yelled Laura furiously, pushing Will away. "I have to go back!"

She wanted to cry and stamp in rage and frustration. And yes, just sheer, exhausted longing. Carmilla had been so close. She'd found her. They had touched. She'd been so close to getting answers finally. And as much as things had been difficult, she thought - she felt they'd been getting to some sort of understanding. Laura could still feel Carmilla in her arms, holding her tight. She could still feel Carmilla's soft kiss on her forehead. And now this. Goodbye? And to be just pushed out of there, without even a - What the hell, Carmilla?! It was just all so - ugh!

"Whoa, okay, word of advice, Dora the explorer," Will said, rubbing his shoulder where Laura punched it, "if you're going to go all mission impossible here, don't keep yelling your head off in a dangerous place if you don't want any nasties to find you."

"You're the only nasty I see around here," Laura said, narrowing her eyes and scrunching up her face in distaste. Will mocked her with the same look.

"All the same, that idiot Kitty said to keep you safe, so as much as this is a sign her mind is totally going, being cooped up in that place, that's what we're going to do," said Will, pulling her roughly along to a quiet, deserted corner.

"Where are you taking me?" Laura said apprehensively.

"Just before we leave the field, you and I, little nerd hottie," Will said, baring his teeth nastily, "are going to have a nice quiet little chat before I let you go. Somewhere we can't be overheard, or pounced on by your eager beaver ginger goofball pals."

"If you hurt me -" warned Laura, bunching up her fists and taking a stance.

"Relax, karate kid," Will said, rolling his eyes, "You don't know what a raging bitch your study buddy crush can be. But I do, if you piss her off one too many times. Even chained up, her bite is worse than her snark. You know she's a vampire though so I'm guessing you're in it for the thrill of it all, aren't you? Just can't get enough. You humans are all the same. But a deal's a deal and she's got me good this time, so I don't wanna have any trouble, see?" Will sneered, sounding like a gangster from an old black and white film.

"What do you want from me?" Laura said sullenly, pulling away from him. "Just let me go."

"I'm thinking we can help each other out, with a little exchange, whaddya say?" Will winked horribly, trying to look charming but failing miserably. Laura rolled her eyes.

They'd reached a small stand of trees around a clearing with a stone slab. It was overgrown enough to be hidden, but it was still easy enough to see if anyone crept up on them. Will pushed Laura roughly towards the stone slab.

"Take a seat, short stuff. Listen - I know you, I've heard about you from my boy Kirsch - you're like all the nosy journalism majors ever - I know you want answers, Lois Lane, and you might be able to get me a little something I need from your roommate."

Betty? Why Betty? What did she have to do with Will? And for that matter, what was that crack earlier about Betty's grandma? Could this be information that could help save Betty? But Will was as untrustworthy a character as she'd ever hoped never to meet, and he was a zeta dudebro to boot. She wouldn't trust him as far as she could throw him, especially if he was responsible for putting Carmilla in chains.

"Why would I help you?" Laura said in the unfriendliest way she knew how. "If I do will it make you go away?" Will rolled his eyes, looking up at the sky.

"Seriously, I do not see why Kitty wasted a favour on a puny human like you," Will muttered, clenching his hands in the air, "She's going soft. " He sighed. "Welp, guess that's what happens just before you die. Atonement for your sins and all that." He shrugged to himself, shaking his head over Carmilla's foolishness.

"WHAT?!" Laura almost shouted.

"What? What?!" said Will in a panic, looking around, "What do you see? Do you see Mother? Oh hell!"

"No, I mean what did you just say?" Laura said, her face pale. "What's going to happen to Carmilla? Tell me." Laura's mouth was dry.

"Relax, study buddy, it would never have worked out between you anyway," Will said easily, before -

"You will tell me now or I swear to god I will dump you in a vat of boiling - ugh - garlic-infused oil!" She's grabbed his tshirt, bunched in her tiny fist, before pushing him away in frustration. _What was going to happen to Carmilla? What now?_

"Watch it, shorty, don't you know enough not to mess with a vampire? Geez, where does Kitty find you people and query: why doesn't she just leave you there?" Will said, shaking his head, tidying his tshirt in annoyance.

"Carmilla's days are numbered, okay, what's the big idea screeching in my ear like that? I told you it's dangerous here, to be yelling all over the place, so shut your piehole, kiddo."

"Carmilla - is going to die?" Laura said faintly. _Not that my life's worth much. Not that it matters anymore._ "Why? How? Is she sick? Oh god, I have to get back inside the tower. I have to see her." Laura said stubbornly, starting to move back. But she was easily caught by Will and forced to sit back down again on the old stone bench. He pointed an angry finger at her, warning her to stay put.

"Yeah, nerd girl. She's going to die. Her time has come. She knows it. I know it. Everybody knows it. It'll happen at the Jubilee. In the time of the bells."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure everyone will hate me for doing this - but this is how it has to happen. Carmilla would never have told Laura what she needed to know, especially not what she learns in this chapter. And it's crucial she learns what is going to happen and why Carmilla is being so stubborn and mysterious.
> 
> Note, the original chapter was twice as long and I split it up, so the next one should come fairly soon. I hope.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the midst of danger, Laura gets cracking with finding out what the hell is going on here.
> 
> The verse that inspired me, from The Bells by Edgar Allan Poe.
> 
> In the silence of the night   
>  How we shiver with affright   
>  At the melancholy menace of their tone!   
>  For every sound that floats   
>  From the rust within their throats   
>  Is a groan.   
>  And the people—ah, the people,   
>  They that dwell up in the steeple,   
>  All alone,   
>  And who tolling, tolling, tolling,   
>  In that muffled monotone,   
>  Feel a glory in so rolling   
>  On the human heart a stone—   
> They are neither man nor woman,   
> They are neither brute nor human,   
>  They are Ghouls

_"She's going to die. Her time has come. She knows it. I know it. Everybody knows it. At the time of the Jubilee. In the time of the bells."_

"Have you got some kind of a death wish, you damn idiot?"

Will had grabbed her easily as she'd tried to run for the tower and pulled her back by her hoodie, as though she were a puppet on a string. For a moment his face was the face of someone so scared by what might happen, actually scared for her, he'd forgotten his own strength. She slumped back down again, choking, and he loomed over her dangerously, his eyes glittering, preventing her escape. But then his stance softened just the tiniest bit, seeming confused by her stubbornness.

"You're not getting anywhere near that tower. I may not always get on with Kitty but the deal was to get you to safety and that tower - do you not even know that's the most dangerous place you can be on campus? Why do you think Mother put her there, for funsies?"

"If you're so set on doing Carmilla a favour why don't you help me get her out of there instead of mouthing off? Why are we just sitting here?!" Laura hissed through gritted teeth, rubbing her neck from the pain.

Will looked puzzled still, shaking his head, before he started chuckling.

"You really are one obsessive study buddy. You and your whole ginger crew - and you got Kirsch roped in as well. I get it. So you've found out some of our dirty little secrets and you're going all Scooby gang over it now. Whoo... uncovering the big mystery. Like that matters." Will mocked them, pretending to look scared.

"I just don't get why you care so much. It's _Carmilla_." Will said this as though it was obvious and shrugged.

"Ex _cuse_ me? She's going to die, and you're asking why I'm making a big deal out of this? What planet are you from?"

Will gave a short laugh.

"I'm feeling in a generous mood this morning, so I'll give you some friendly advice." Will said sourly, "Don't think you can change things. The sooner you stop going all googly eyes over her the better for you. Doesn't matter how many times you try and break into the most dangerous place in Silas and any other crazy romantic gesture you wanna do."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You should know - Carmilla has some epic thing going on with a mysterious hottie from her past. That's what I hear. That chick's the only one who has the remotest chance of altering what's already set in place, and that's clearly not you. And when this hottie comes to call, if she comes at all, Mother will be waiting for her. Mother knows. You haven't met my Mother, but I'm warning you, you seriously do not want to."

Will's laugh grated on Laura's ears. She shivered involuntarily, remembering the Queen, her face in shadow, the swathe of evil that wrapped around her. No, she really wished she had never met her. But as for that mysterious girl from Carmilla's past - was it her? Wasn't it her? It was hard to tell. But just the fact that they might know of her existence and were waiting for her, frightened her - Carmilla had silently warned her not to give herself away for good reason.

Will was still speaking. These vampires really loved the sound of their own voices.

"So give it up, little nerd, Carmilla is never going to be with you. If you're set on getting your heart broken, do it on your own time and just stay out of the way of the grown ups, hey?"

Well. Okay then. They had all warned her. Her friends, the Monster of Karnstein Hall herself, and now Will, resident bad guy. Laura Hollis, smalltown girl, what could she possibly do? How could she ever save the day? The insecure part of Laura was fighting with whatever confidence she had left, which wasn't much. But she knew one thing, and that was Carmilla didn't deserve this. Betty didn't deserve this, none of them did. Not to die, not now. Not if Laura had anything to do with it. No. She wasn't going to turn back now.

"I care about my friends, about Carmilla, about Betty and the others, and if you had any friends, maybe you'd -" Laura returned angrily.

"Well, yeah, it's not like she hasn't been aware for hundreds of years she could be next in line for sacrifice and the way she deliberately gets Mother's goat - she's asking for it. Literally. I mean she's even volunteered herself a couple of times," Will mused. "Not sure why Mother never took her up on that offer before. I would have, like a shot." He snapped his fingers. "Bye bye Kitty." He smirked.

"Volunteered?" Laura shook her head. That didn't make sense. "Why would she volunteer?"

Who would ever volunteer to die? What kind of hopeless state of mind did a person have to be in to even think like that? Why was she set on sacrificing herself? Had Carmilla really just given up? On life? On... her?

_It's you that's forgotten me. So many times. So you'll excuse me if I don't care anymore, if I don't jump for joy that you've found me._

What did that mean? What had she done, what had she forgotten? _What had she forgotten?_  

"You're a nosy little frosh aren't you? Don't think you can just keep asking me questions and get answers. Everything has a price. What you know already is liable to get you killed, but hey whatever floats your boat. But if you do a little something for me, I'll tell you all the nitty-gritty details of Shawshank's last days. Deal?"

"What is it you want, Will?" Laura asked tiredly.

"There's a ring," Will said, hesitating, "Sleeping Betty has it, I'm sure. I really really need your help finding it. Okay? It belongs to me. I gave it to Bertha - to her grandmother, by accident years ago. It's all on the up and up, I swear. It was mine first and I need it back. Just a simple, plain silver band. There's some engraving on the inside -"

Laura frowned. Something was coming back to her, that time they searched Betty's things for a charm that would explain the weird dreams. Laf had taken away a few things for testing. Hadn't there been a ring amongst those items?

"- I don't exactly remember. Blondie might be wearing it on her finger, on a necklace, it could be somewhere in her room, I don't know. I've searched all over, rifled around her underwear drawer, so many times, I looked in her jewelry box and I can't -"

"What do you mean you've searched her underwear drawer?! You - you - ugh!" Laura looked disgusted. "Wait - her room? You mean _my_ room?! You broke into my room?!" Was there no end to this jerkface's long list of douchey criminal acts?

"Yeah, listen, so I'm a bad guy okay? Don't act so surprised. But I need that ring, short stuff. I need that ring like yesterday. You get me that ring and I'll tell you what you want to know."

Laura considered this, her heart racing. What to do? If that ring was one of the trinkets they tested... This - this did not seem like a good idea. But - Carmilla. She had to know more. She had to.

"Well I can look but that's all I can do. I mean how can I even tell what it looks like?"

What was she doing? Why was she agreeing to do this, for Will, who just admitted to being a bad guy?! He couldn't be trusted, not at all. But - Carmilla. What choice did she have?

"Does this have anything to do with Carmilla, this ring?" Laura asked suddenly. "Is that why you want to find it? Why would her Mother make her own daughter a prisoner?"

"Eh, so families are weird," Will avoided the question, his eyes shifting. "But nuh-uh - not telling you another thing until I get the ring." Will glared, but underneath his glare was - what? Uncertainty? Untrustworthiness?

"Now, Will, or no deal." Will hesitated, chewing on his lip. He looked at the ground, frowning in thought.

"You'll look for the ring, right, nerd? Right away? You promise you'll hand it over to me? I need that ring."

"I promise if you promise to tell me what you know right now." Laura agreed.

"Done. It's a promise. I'm holding you to that. I must be going soft in the head." Will said, shaking his head. "We don't have much time, but -"

Will looked around, scanning the trees for any unusual movements. He seemed antsy.

"So what do you know about the Jubilee?"

 

* * *

 

"Shh, did you hear that?"

It had taken the split second Will had turned, mid-sentence in another one of his long speeches, to peer anxiously through the trees, for Laura to turn and run. She'd heard enough. She needed to see Carmilla, the feeling was overwhelming after what she'd heard from Will.

She ran hard, until she thought her heart would burst, back towards the dark tower. All the while she could sense two things weighing heavily against her. One was that Will, with a snarl, had already zipped his way after her, getting closer by the second. The other was that her own sense of fear and horror was revolted by the feeling of danger from the tower, which pressed and pushed her away, telling her to run the other way, to forget Carmilla, alone in that dark, mysterious belltower. She didn't listen - she couldn't.

By the time she had touched the door to the tower, it had pushed opened, silently, and one of her problems had gone. For some reason, Will had not run after her, just as she'd avoided his last futile grab, she'd pushed her way in and suddenly - no Will. That should have made her fearful, it should have made her turn tail and run, but Laura set her shoulders and took a step forward. She wasn't going to turn back now. Carmilla was up there.

The atmosphere was oppressive. It smothered, like an unbearably warm day just before a terrible storm. Something pushed all around her, making her weary and distracted, as a buzz went round her head. Had gravity somehow gotten heavier? Still, her feet took one silent step after another, up the stone staircase.

Her shaking hand pushed at Carmilla's door with a light creak. She just wanted to see her, to understand. Why? Why to all of this?

To her surprise, there was no one inside. The bed, with its rumpled sheets, was still unmade, the objects she'd thrown at Will were still strewn around the room. The only thing she noticed together was that her bag had been placed neatly by the wall, bulging a little. No sign of the book, or any of her other things. She picked up the bag and slung it over her shoulder. It was all in there, the book, her rose. Carmilla had packed it up carefully. But where was Carmilla?

She opened her mouth, but the name died on her lips. She felt a strange force, urging her to stay silent. Everything around her was calling out danger, danger! Laura broke out in a cold sweat, considering whether to run. In the morning light, she could see a lot more in Carmilla's room. It was a lonely, austere place. And this was where Carmilla had been, all semester. Carmilla had lived here. It wasn't right.

There was a small, dark green door that she had never noticed before. It was tiny - enough room for her to fit through. It must have been where Carmilla had gone. It couldn't be some kind of washroom, because Laura could see the open door of the bathroom to one side of the room. No, the dark green door led to something else, and that something else was telling her to run. Run now. But there was no turning back. Not now.

Feeling like some heroine in a gothic novel, she touched her small hand to the door. It buzzed and vibrated under her palm. Some unreadable power was behind that door. Whatever it was, in there was an answer to her many questions. She took a deep breath and pushed it open.

 

* * *

 

"You know, that big ol' celebration, celebrating who the hell knows? Silas boundaries, shut down to outside traffic?" Will asked.

"Well, like everyone else, we know it's happening. We went to the town halls. But when is it on? And what even is it? That's what we don't know." Laura said curiously, her reporter's hat on.

"And you never _will_ know, as long as you try and find out about it outside the field. Not till it actually happens. Not until they want you to know. Hear any bells?" Will said abruptly.

"What do you mean, does that ring any bells? What should it remind me of?"

"No I mean, literally, do you hear any bells?" Will asked.

"No. No I don't. Hey that's -"

"Weird right?" Will clicked his tongue and cocked his finger into a gun, shooting it to make his point.

"We designed a force field around this place to block out the bells. New vamp technology. It's pretty nifty. We can even pipe the sound wherever we want."

Will's voice sounded almost proud now, like he was showing off. They thought they'd have to interrogate vampires to get any information, and maybe she'd just bargained away she didn't even know what, but Will now was just giving everything away, huge secrets. Hidden vampire technology? This sounded huge, the potential scoop of a century. Even for the possible return of a ring, it seemed weird he was telling her. Before Laura had time to wonder why, he kept going, bursting with the thrill of revealing the news to a new audience.

"Only whoever is playing the bells can hear the bells inside the tower, but that's okay because they're playing it. They know. Up until the fifties, anyone near this field hearing the bells - it would totally mess you up, even us vampires, especially once we put the amplifiers in place. People were getting so distracted, forgetting their own names, especially if they hadn't been conditioned to listen to the bells leading up to the Jubilee, they'd go gaga. Sometimes they'd be bleeding from their ears, their eyes, everything. Dude, you should have seen it in those days, man! Chaos!"

He snorted like a stupid frat boy, finding it funny. Laura shook her head, giving him a dubious side-eye at his enthusiasm for people bleeding out of their ears.

"How - why? I don't understand. What do the bells have to do with the Jubilee?"

Will ran an impatient hand through his hair, grunting inaudibly.

"I don't know how much you and your Scooby-doo crew have found out but I don't have time to explain everything. You've heard the phrase forgive and forget?"

"I'm sure that's one you try and use often." Laura said witheringly, nodding. Will made a mocking face at her.

"Think of the Jubilee as a season of forgiveness and forgetting."

"Okay - that doesn't sound too bad?" Will laughed mirthlessly at this.

"Yeah, right, little nerd. It's really a time when bonds - enchanted bonds, can be completely severed or permanently strengthened. So you want to break out of a curse, a geas, an enchantment? The Jubilee would be the time to do it, if you're able to pay the price. It happens every seven years, give or take a couple - I mean, it's kinda up to Hell to dictate the terms."

"Hell?" Laura asked faintly. "Like Hell Hell? As in evil demons, fire and brimstone, hell no we won't go to Hell Hell?" Laura whimpered, her voice strangled by fear.

"Yeah, that Hell. The bells play during the Jubilee and they make people all distracted, they make people forget - even forget that it happened just seven years ago. It's like everything old is new again. There's a dangerous power in those bells - you don't even wanna know."

 

* * *

 

Laura was _not_ prepared. She had been warned, but that had never stopped her before. Nothing could have prepared her for this.

She was not prepared for the relentless wall of mysterious energy that slammed into her so suddenly, the horrendous pain of the shrieking bells, upon walking through that strange small door. Above her head, at the top of the long shaft of the steeple, were the heavy iron bells that hung, tolling, clanging, screeching. Before she could turn and leave, the door slammed shut behind her, from some force coming from the bells themselves. They hungered for her, how they hungered. She could feel it and she was afraid. They were true monsters, hanging from the rafters, jeering at her, snatching at her.

They rang ceaselessly, a noise that was unbearable. Oh god that noise. She was frozen in place. She had never heard such a thing, she never ever wanted to again. It was not even like the sound of bells anymore, this close up, but the sound of thousands of lost souls, collected in the bodies of those bells, screaming the blood from their hearts. Every sorrow, every pain, every hatred, every heartache ever known seemed to be coming from those bells. It pierced right through her ears to the rest of her body. It shook her violently.

Her head, her heart, her entire being was about to explode in this collected centuries of sorrow and despair. She could now feel a wet trail of tears coming from her ears and her eyes, dripping slowly, as suddenly she looked past the gloom, to a dirty little window on the other side, where she saw Carmilla's horrified face looking back at her.

She felt dizzy and faint, as though she was going to black out at any minute, but her mind and body refused to. They were held fast by something. Instead, it seemed as though her entire life was being sucked away through all her pores and nerve endings, in one burst, by the evil force emanating from the bells. Their horrifying music was slowing down, but the echoes were still doing their evil work, slamming off the walls, slapping her this way and that. Her body started shaking in some kind of seizure, as she staggered further into the room looking for relief, her arms and legs moving uncontrollably. Her ears. The pain in her ears. It was unbearable.

In a moment, she was reminded of the first time she ever saw Carmilla. She was gliding towards her, quickly, like a ghost in the belltower, her arm outstretched, her fingers pointing outward. Her face was pale with a heart-sinking fright, there was no mistaking that. Once again her slim fingers had tangled in Laura's hair, but now it was to cover her ears, to block out the noise, desperately. But it didn't work. Carmilla quickly tucked Laura's head against her, stopping her ears against her body, cradling her, comforting her, but Laura's body was going limp like all the damsels in distress she never wanted to be. The bells. They were horrifying. The noise wouldn't stop.

If Carmilla had tried to talk to her, her lips moving like some impossible dream, Laura did not hear, for there was nothing to be heard but the exhausting shrieking of the bells, the cry of so many ghouls, reaching out for fresh humanity. She felt now as if she had never heard anything but that destructive sadness, in her whole entire life, and she would die hearing it, of that she was sure. She would die here, having done nothing, saved no one, being completely useless. Her eyes blurred with the tears she knew finally to be blood.

This was what Carmilla had tried to warn her of. Even Will, not caring a thing for her, had warned her, had yanked her back in his fear that anyone should experience what she was experiencing now. He had chased after her, but had been too afraid to follow her any further to the tower while the bells were ringing.

And like a fool, she had not listened, always thinking she knew better, that she had to fight the people who wanted to protect her.

But once again, Carmilla lowered her mouth, and tenderly this time, she sunk her teeth into Laura's neck, and drained her until the blackness took over.

 

* * *

 

"This is how it works, nerd reporter - every geas has to have a way out. It's all about balance in the world. You can't have an unbreakable enchantment because the power needed to maintain that would be insane. That's the rule, you've read the fairytales.

So during the Jubilee, the person who has a hold over you, who's placed that geas on you, is bound by Hell to let you try to escape if you request it. But they don't make it easy. Our Mother Dearest really likes to hold her grudges, let's say that. You still have to follow the letter of the law, but the Jubilee is the time where you can bend the supernatural rules just a little bit and be forgiven. Find a little loophole, play a little trick, you know what I'm saying?"

"So Carmilla has a chance? During the Jubilee, she can be set free? She really has a chance? But how? What has to happen? Tell me!"

"Hah, not so fast, in a minute, nerd hottie. You have to understand, all our power comes from Mother. Carmilla's power is all tangled up with Mother's in some intricate way, so they're almost the same person. You know? We are linked to her, like family. We _are_ family. But Mother herself had to get it from somewhere, and she has to maintain it, for the good of us all. And for us to keep our powers, we have to help her. See?

So the Jubilee is also about strengthening those bonds. Hell doesn't just give you a free ride, you have to pay. It means anyone who wants to wield more power, like, I dunno, the ancient evil ruler of a vampire clan I like to call Mom, can ask for it."

"Ask who? Santa?"

It was just starting to strike Laura that Will was really telling her a lot of secrets, secrets that he surely would be punished for sharing if anyone ever found out. He kept looking around him nervously. There was something definitely weird about this.

"Close enough." Will shrugged, "Satan. You know how my Mother got her powers? Satan. You know how she keeps it?"

"Human sacrifice?" Laura said half-jokingly, before stopping short. "Ugh. Human victims. My friends."

"Bingo. Human victims... or even vampires." Will's voice was scared now. The air around them had stilled and his tones were hushed. "It's not a safe time for any of us, during the Jubilee."

 

* * *

 

Laura groaned, her eyes fluttering open. Everything seemed blurry still, and she had a massive headache, not to mention the pain in her neck. She felt so weak, so exhausted. She moved her head, and realised with a shock that she was laying down, her head propped up on Carmilla's lap. Carmilla was half cradling her with one hand and with the other she was - what? Doing paperwork?

"We have to stop meeting like this, cupcake," Carmilla said dryly, glancing at her briefly, before scribbling something into a notebook that - ugh - lay on Laura's stomach. How dare Carmilla do paperwork at a time like this?

"Has anyone ever told you you're a pain in the neck?" Laura joked weakly.

She felt, not just a huge relief at seeing Carmilla, but some indescribably warm feeling that rushed through her at finding her not as cold and confusing as she'd been the last time they'd met. Carmilla was holding her, as though - well as though she cared. Leaning against her was comforting, after all this time, despite the dangerous circumstances she'd found herself in. Of course, she couldn't let Carmilla know that. Not right now. Carmilla was a flash of safety in an unsafe world but there was still too much between them that had to be dealt with. Though she was pretty sure Carmilla had just risked her life to save her. Those bells were definitely no joke. Carmilla, it was turning out, was making a habit of being a hero.

"Well I'm sorry I didn't punch you in the face to relieve you of your seizures instead but maybe I should do that next time." Carmilla said mildly, not bothering to look at her. Okay, well, only kind of a hero.

"Mind telling me why you're using me as a desk?" Laura said after a moment. Her voice was faint, but all her other senses were just a little on fire. Carmilla's arm around her was feeling good right now. She felt warm and safe. She leaned her head more closely against Carmilla. The arm around her tightened as Carmilla supported her head carefully. Carmilla cared about her, she must, to do this.

"A girl's got to do her philosophy homework. Wouldn't want to be caught slacking. I don't think they make exceptions for being imprisoned in a Kafkaesque nightmare, that's virtually a standard philosophical state of mind." Carmilla glared at her now, intently. "I didn't exactly know when you'd be waking up, sunshine. And as much as I like to sit in silence, contemplating your demise, I thought I should put my time to better use."

She was not angry exactly, more withering. Laura felt sheepish. She had been warned after all, so many times.

Laura finally broke off the eye contact, reluctantly, looking around her as best she could, considering she'd nearly been put in a coma. She groaned again, as a sharp pain pierced behind her eyes. Her head ached so much. Was she dreaming or was Carmilla's hand slowly stroking her hair? It was hard to know what she was feeling in this state.

"Where am I?" she said in a distracted voice.

"You are," Carmilla murmured slowly, "in the most dangerous room in Silas."

"Huh," said Laura noncommittally. Carmilla's voice grew rougher.

"Right after I warned you not to come here and actually asked a fairly powerful though apparently incompetent vampire, who I'll have a bone to pick with later, to escort you from the premises for your own safety, you somehow managed to run headlong into another near death experience. This is quite an achievement. Congratulations, I hope that was enjoyable for you." Carmilla said sarcastically.

"Carmilla," Laura began, her voice fragile.

"No. Do not 'Carmilla' me. What part of 'this place is dangerous, you are _not_ safe here' is so hard for you to understand?"

Laura opened her mouth, a frustrated, sarcastic response on her lips, when Carmilla clapped her palm over her face, hard, stopping her. Laura instinctively struggled but Carmilla's warning face stopped her. Her dark eyes had hardened, her ears alert. She bent down, her eyes glittering with an unreadable intensity.

"This is the most dangerous room in Silas," she repeated, whispering in Laura's ear, "but ironically it might just be the safest one for you right now. Stay here, do not move, do not make a noise if you value your life."

Carefully, she raised Laura as if she weighed no more than a feather and placed her gently and silently on the floor. Standing up, she zipped quickly towards the door, gliding smoothly, and left without a sound, closing the door behind her.

Surprised by the sudden exit, Laura exerted herself and crawled her way towards the door. It took a while. She was groggy, she felt beaten up, not at all in good condition, but she had to know what was going on. She knelt at the door, her cheek leaning against the worn wood. She tried to breathe quietly, her eye peering through a narrow gap in the door to see what was going on.

Before she could see anything at all, she could feel it against her face, a slight hint of evil wafting through the air, even through the cracks in the heavy wooden door. A feeling she knew well. The sense of very real danger hit her hard. Uh oh. This was exactly what Carmilla had not wanted. This was no dream anymore.

"Well, well my glittering girl," came a mocking voice, that was familiar, yet different at the same time. She'd missed some intense talk between them already, for Carmilla's posture showed a furious anger. The black shadowy figure before her was much harder to see - but something about the voice seemed more familiar than it ought to be.

Laura's skin crawled as she tried to place the new tone in that voice. It had the deep, rich snarl of the Queen, that she remembered well, and she would never forget it. But here in the dark, not distracted by the waves of pure evil that drowned everything else out, there was something else she tried to catch about that voice. What was it?

Laura peered hard through the gap but it was no good - the woman was in shadow as usual and moved little.

"I understand there was some disturbance outside the perimeter last night. Some _nosy_ little Silas students. Poor sweet William had _such_ a time." The voice drawled, sounding more and more familiar, "Friends of yours?"

"I don't have any friends, as you know well. You've made sure of that, _Mother_ ," Carmilla hissed.

"Oh, _tsk, tsk_ ," the strange woman clicked, "I thought surely perhaps some lovesick young girl might have had some idea of a grand, _romantic_ gesture, rescuing you from the tower. No? Must I still wait, after all these years, for your one true love? Mother is _so_ hoping to properly meet her this time. Our first visit was cut - _regrettably_ short. But she comes round almost every Jubilee, doesn't she, like clockwork. I do adore punctuality in a young girl. This time I'll be ready for her." The face was hard to see, but the sneering, snarling smile was unmistakeable.

Laura shifted, and then froze as she made an audible noise. She leaned her head against the wood for a moment, exhausted and afraid. But she couldn't stop looking. The woman perked up, looking around, looking hard at the door, straight, it seemed, into Laura's eyes. Laura stopped breathing, mesmerized by the fear of being discovered.

"Have you come here just to gloat at the prisoner or is there something you want?" Carmilla said coolly.

"What was that noise?" The woman said, her voice hard like diamonds. She took a step closer. Then another.

"A mouse probably," Carmilla answered easily. "But by all means why don't you go have a look?"

Laura still held her breath. What? Carmilla, no! Was she about to be betrayed again?

"I'm sure it's been a while since you heard the bells up close and personal." Carmilla said, mildly threatening. "I could arrange a life altering musical session if that's what you'd like."

There was a long pause. Laura leaned against the wood, closing her eyes, trying not to breathe. Finally she could hear the woman's steps retreating, almost hesitant, which seemed unusual for her forceful character. It made Laura even more afraid that she was stuck in a place where the bells seemed to make even the most evil of evildoers nervous.

Laura dared to open her eyes again.

"The playing of the bells is a privilege of tradition, Mircalla, but not set in stone. I might suddenly have the whim to lock you up with the bells. Do not try my patience. Children are so ungrateful."

"You've already put me in chains, imprisoned me in this hellhole, not to mention slaughtered my entire family, assassinated me and tricked me - maybe you could spare me your woe-is-me dramatics," Carmilla said dryly.

Was that true? JP had said the stories told how the Monster of Karnstein had murdered her family before going on to slaughter all the innocents at Karnstein. Had the woman Carmilla now called Mother done it all? And why? Why Carmilla? Why sacrifice Carmilla now, after having kept her alive for all these years? Laura's mind could hardly wrap itself around all the new information she'd received. So much of this didn't make any sense. Not at all.

"Mircalla," Carmilla's Mother said evenly, sounding oddly business like now and not as flamboyantly dramatic, "you disappoint me. You know full well, if you had behaved and followed the rules, you wouldn't be here. I have the human targets who are in stasis - I do not need to sacrifice you to the darkness. You insist on defying me. If you would play the game, give up the girl, you might go free, go to your classes, live in the dorms, just like a normal Silas student. Mother would take care of you, child. I always have."

Carmilla didn't even bother to laugh at this speech. She looked bored, peering at her nails. The woman, Carmilla's Mother, clicked her tongue in impatience and anger at Carmilla's disobedience.

Laura, behind the door, quivered with the fear of sudden understanding and discovery. She knew now. The woman, Carmilla's Mother, was the Dean. The Dean was not just some glamazon administrator in cahoots with the vampires, organizing the Jubilee and signing off on placing Betty in Laura's dorm room. She was the kingpin.

But this woman had gone from the immense power of the Queen of some other, Faerieland world, as Carmilla had described it, to being the Dean of Students at Silas, a relatively humble position. Seeing her at town hall meetings was fearful enough, but there wasn't always the same sickening black cloud of evil that flowed from her, like there had been in the dreams. Had she lost that power? Or was she better able to hide her evil in plain sight now? What had happened? Was that the reason she'd needed Carmilla and Will and others, because their youth and beauty could lure in the targets more easily?

Laura made a mental note to ask JP to find out more about the founding of Silas U. It was all connected somehow. Perhaps Danny had been right. Maybe Silas really had started as one giant honeypot trap for young women? It would have been just after Carmilla had been - god - buried alive. The threads were so slowly coming together, but Laura still had a lot of untangling to do.

But the other thing that struck her was about Betty and the others. That was right. If Carmilla was the accepted sacrifice, marked for death, why had they still collected human victims? Why were her friends in this coma, every morning going through the same kind of horrifying seizures that she'd just experienced?

 

* * *

 

"The Summoning is part of the Jubilee. It's where you summon the demons of hell to give you the powers you ask for. But beware, you have to give something back in exchange and man, it doesn't come cheap. You summon a demon - you really need to give them something valuable for their trouble. As a sacrifice, a tithe. And then you have to pay up installments. Every. Freaking. Jubilee. _If_ you want to maintain that power and good relations with Hell. It's like true vampire lending, like payday loans with diabolical interest. Once you make a deal with the devil you gotta keep it up. You don't ever EVER want to mess with Hell."

"Okay, so you're saying Satan is basically a sleazy loanshark? But why vampires? Why would you sacrifice your own kind?" Laura asked, completely confused. "It doesn't make sense. Don't you guys want to stay alive to, you know, drink blood and be annoying and whatever else it is that vampires do?" Will rolled his eyes.

"Think about it shorty. What use is a random number of human bodies to Hell? It's just flesh and blood. All it is is offering Hell a sense of fear, of puny humans being afraid. It's cheap and nasty. You could so easily kidnap, maim, murder any number of stupid humans. It gets boring after a while. But Hell wants something actually valuable -"

"Gee, thanks, Will," Laura said sarcastically.

"- and that means things that are valued, wherever you find may it, whether it's a sentimental keepsake or precious memories or... true love. Real hurt, real pain comes from mislaid love. Hell likes to take away things you love and make you pay, just for kicks and giggles. More fun that way."

Like the rose. Just like the rose.

_You steal a rose, you pay the price. I take something of value from you. I'm forced to. And then it goes to Mother Dearest. Sacrifice doesn't mean much if it's worthless, if it means nothing to you. And the most valuable things of all are those things we love the most. Things with sentimental value, memories - true love. I'll take it all._

It was starting to make sense, what Carmilla had said. A sacrifice to Hell, so Carmilla's Mother could maintain her own powers. And she had a hold on Carmilla, she had a hold over all of them. Carmilla's Mother had forced her into a deal at the point of death - enchanted power and long life in exchange for a steady collection of human victims. And where did that leave Laura? All the time they'd spent together, that fateful night in 1872 - was it all part of this elaborate game too or was Laura somehow the only exception to the rule? She didn't know what she could really trust.

But Will was continuing as though he had to get it all out, as though he'd been dying to explain it to someone.

"A vampire is a pretty valuable member of higher society - " Laura snorted at this, as Will glared at her in passing "- and there aren't that many of us. Sacrificing a vampire to Hell is super powerful but it's a double-edged sword. It's not that easy to raise a vampire, to bring life back to someone who's dead. It's freaking hard, dude. That's why any vampire who isn't grateful to his or her Sire is a damn fool," Will said bitterly.

"And Carmilla?" Laura persisted.

"Yep, Kitty is the biggest damn fool of them all." Will shook his head as though he wished Carmilla were older and wiser. "I don't know why I bother sometimes. She just. Won't. Listen."

"No, I mean can we get back to Carmilla?" Laura asked, frustrated.

"Okaay, One Track. I'm getting to that. Every Jubilee there's the danger that one of us will be sacrificed to Hell in place of the human victims, especially if we don't have enough valuable ones - but we don't know and we can't know until the time of the Jubilee itself. We don't exactly know what Hell will accept and only Mother really knows how to read the signs, since it's through her that the power flows. But it makes us all work harder to get the targets leading up to the Jubilee. The more human targets, the safer we are. No human victims means one of us definitely will be sacrificed that Jubilee year. Our own lives are at stake, you see? It's not like we're bloodsucking monsters just for the fun of it. Well at least not _just_ for the fun of it." He smirked.

This was getting worse and worse. Even the vampires were being kept in line with the fear of sacrifice, forced to capture human victims whether they wanted to or not. But knowing Will, he got a kick out of snatching worthy victims. 

"But why not fight back? Why would you just sit there and accept being sacrificed? Why just give up and take it like that?"

"Oh you naive little nerd. It's for the good of society of course. You know, like cannibalism." Will nodded, as though he thought it was obvious.

"Uh. Ookay. I think, Will, we might have _slightly_ different ideas of what's good for society." 

"I'm saying if one of us is sacrificed, the rest of us are saved for many, many years. That's how valuable a vampire sacrifice is, way more valuable than a bunch of idiot humans. Once we didn't hold a Jubilee for twenty years after a vampire sacrifice. But it's the not knowing who it is that's nerve-wracking - Mother is the one who chooses, so you would think hey, why don't I get on her good side? But no, not Kitty, she's too high and mighty for that."

"So how do you know it'll be Carmilla? This year?"

"She practically volunteered, forced herself to be chosen. Look, I don't know the whole story, I wasn't here for all of it. But she's been kicking up a stink, getting in trouble for trying to release the human victims - Mother pretty much insinuated she was the tithe this Jubilee. I don't know why she just doesn't toe the line, life would be so much easier. Mother just wants what's best for her and us, you know? She's got a cult to run. Kitty could have everything she ever wanted. If she would just - be normal! Hell, Kitty's a mess." Will sighed, passing his hand over his face in frustration, and Laura was reminded, oddly, of Perry.

"But the real reason I think has to do with the only way Kitty can break free of her enchantments."

"How? How can she break free?"

Will ran his hand through his hair again, ignoring her question. He was jittery, looking all around him, sensitive to any noise.

"She's in that belltower now, all chained up, because she's basically bait in a trap for the only person who can free her."

Suddenly Will lifted his head, raising a hand to silence Laura. "Shh, did you hear that?" He turned his back to Laura, peering intently into the trees, searching for anything out of place.

Laura ran.

* * *

 

Carmilla and her Mother had traded biting witticisms back and forth until the conversation was finally hissed in undertones. Laura could hear no more, until the Dean finally left, slamming the door behind her. Carmilla made a loud, frustrated, unintelligible noise and threw something at the door with a thud and a jangle of chains, her back to Laura.

Laura saw Carmilla's shoulders slump then, heavy with resignation, before she cracked her neck, moving her head from side to side, and set her shoulders.

In a split second, she'd zipped back to the door and opened it. Laura had hardly any time to stand up and step back when Carmilla slammed into her unexpectedly. She caught her in her arms before they could fall into some awkward moment all tangled up on the floor. Laura released a breath.

"Well if it isn't a little mouse. You," Carmilla said with mild irritation, "are incorrigible. I told you to stay put so naturally you did the opposite and risked your life, again, for a spot of nosy eavesdropping. Happy, Lauronica Mars?"

Laura was not really listening. Her eyes dropped down involuntarily. Their faces were so close together as Carmilla held her, and Carmilla's lips looked very soft. What with her near death experience, Laura's mind was getting very distracted. They drew imperceptibly closer to each other, staring, unable to help it. But once Carmilla noticed this, she set Laura back firmly on her feet and released her. Laura's knees gave way weakly, and Carmilla caught her again, putting's Laura's limp arm around her shoulder to support her. They took slow steps back to Carmilla's room.

"So your Mother is the Dean of Students," Laura said by way of conversation.

"Lucky me."

"I have - so many questions." Laura felt still very weak. She closed her eyes and paused for a moment, before taking another step.

"Colour me surprised."

"Why didn't you tell me? That you were marked for death?" Laura said in her awkward, straightforward way.

Carmilla froze. She placed Laura gently down on her mattress and sat down next to her with a sigh.

"If Will's been talking, I wouldn't trust anything he says. What did you give up?" Carmilla said cautiously. How did she know?

"Well he wants me to find some ring that Betty has and in return, he told me a few things. That was the deal."

"What did he tell you?" Carmilla asked abruptly.

"What you wouldn't."

Carmilla took her head in her hands.

"Goddammit!" she said under her breath. Laura looked at her carefully, but Carmilla wouldn't look at her.

"Why, Carmilla," Laura burst out. "Why would you ever ever volunteer for death? To sacrifice yourself? I'm so - ugh, mad at you! You can't do things like that. There's always a way out, somehow. We can figure something out, together. If it's for some stupid, heroic reason I -"

Carmilla laughed as though it was one of the funniest things she'd ever heard.

"I may be many things, but I'm anything but a hero. Don't waste your time thinking of me as one, okay? You'll save yourself a lot of trouble," Carmilla said shortly. She chewed her lip.

"The thing is, you were right the first time," she said finally.

"What do you mean?"

"I _am_ cruel," Carmilla said. She looked at Laura seriously. "There's something you should know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, I'm not too sure about this chapter, I know there are some weak moments but bear with me! This is a 4th rewrite and my head hurts and I'm getting all tangled up myself. I apologise in advance for any continuity errors you might find, there are probably lots. I hang my head in shame.
> 
> Let me know what you think if you like. Thanks for reading! :)

**Author's Note:**

> Just had a very silly idea I wanted to try about Carmilla's back story. Let me know what you think in the comments, if I should go on.


End file.
